rh.royalassassin-第8章

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t　once　while　Hands　and　I　sat　our　weary　horses　at　the　edge　of　the　hubbub。　The　sergeant；　one　Blade；　finally　shouted　them　to　silence；　mostly　so　he　could　speak　his　own　ments　easily。　〃We　hadn't　looked　for　you　until　spring；　man；〃　the　burly　old　soldier　declared。　〃And　even　then；　we　was　told　you　might　not　be　the　man　that　left　here。　But　you　look　good；　you　do。　A　bit　cold；　and　outlandishly　dressed；　and　another　scar　or　two；　but　yourself　for　all　that。　Word　was　that　you　was　hurt　bad；　and　the　Bastard　like　to　die。　Plague　or　poison；　the　rumors　was。〃
　　　　　　　Burrich　laughed　and　held　out　his　arms　that　all　might　admire　his　Mountain　garb。　For　a　moment　I　saw　Burrich　as　they　must　have　seen　him；　his　purple…and…yellow　quilted　trousers　and　smock　and　buskins。　I　no　longer　wondered　at　how　we　had　been　challenged　at　the　gate。　But　I　did　wonder　at　the　rumors。
　　　　　　　〃Who　said　the　Bastard　would　die？〃　I　demanded　curiously。
　　　　　　　〃Who's　asking？〃　Blade　demanded　in　return。　He　glanced　over　my　garments；　looked　me　in　the　eye；　and　knew　me　not。　But　as　I　sat　up　straighter　on　my　horse；　he　gave　a　start。　To　this　day；　I　believe　he　knew　Sooty　and　that　was　how　he　recognized　me。　He　did　not　cover　his　shock。
　　　　　　　〃Fitz？　There's　hardly　half　of　you　left！　You　look　like　you've　had　the　Blood　Plague。〃　It　was　my　first　inkling　of　just　how　bad　I　looked　to　those　who　knew　me。
　　　　　　　〃Who　said　I　had　been　poisoned；　or　afflicted　with　plague？〃　I　repeated　the　question　quietly。
　　　　　　　Blade　flinched　and　glanced　back　over　his　shoulder。　〃Oh；　no　one。　Well；　no　one　in　particular。　You　know　how　it　is。　When　you　didn't　e　back　with　the　others；　well；　some　supposed　this　and　some　that；　and　pretty　soon　it　was　almost　like　we　knew　it。　Rumors；　guardroom　talk。　Soldiers　gossip。　We　wondered　why　you　didn't　e　back；　that　was　all。　No　one　believed　anything　that　was　said。　We　spread　too　many　rumors　ourselves　to　give　gossip　any　credence。　We　just　wondered　why　you　and　Burrich　and　Hands　hadn't　e　back。〃
　　　　　　　He　finally　realized　he　was　repeating　himself　and　fell　silent　before　my　stare。　I　let　the　silence　stretch　long　enough　to　make　it　plain　that　I　didn't　intend　to　answer　this　question。　Then　I　shrugged　it　away。　〃No　harm　done；　Blade。　But　you　can　tell　them　all　the　Bastard　isn't　done　for　yet。　Plagues　or　poisons；　you　should　have　known　Burrich　would　physick　me　through　it。　I'm　alive　and　well；　I　just　look　like　a　corpse。〃
　　　　　　　〃Oh；　Fitz；　lad；　I　didn't　mean　it　that　way。　It's　just　that…〃
　　　　　　　〃I　said；　no　harm　done；　Blade。　Let　it　go。〃
　　　　　　　〃Good　enough；　sir；〃　he　replied。
　　　　　　　I　nodded；　and　looked　at　Burrich　to　find　him　regarding　me　strangely。　When　I　turned　to　exchange　a　puzzled　glance　with　Hands；　I　met　the　same　startlement　on　his　face。　I　could　not　guess　the　reason。
　　　　　　　〃Well；　good　night　to　you；　Sergeant。　Don't　chide　your　man　with　the　pike。　He　did　well　to　stop　strangers　at　Buckkeep's　gate。〃
　　　　　　　〃Yes；　sir。　Good　night；　sir。〃　Blade　gave　me　a　rusty　salute　and　the　great　wooden　gates　swung　wide　before　us　as　we　entered　the　keep。　Sooty　lifted　her　head　and　some　of　the　weariness　fell　from　her。　Behind　me；　Hands's　horse　whinnied　softly　and　Burrich's　snorted。　Never　before　had　the　road　from　the　keep　wall　to　the　stables　seemed　so　long。　As　Hands　dismounted；　Burrich　caught　me　by　the　sleeve　and　held　me　back。　Hands　greeted　the　drowsy　stable　boy　who　appeared　to　light　our　way。
　　　　　　　〃We've　been　some　time　in　the　Mountain　Kingdom；　Fitz；〃　Burrich　cautioned　me　in　a　low　voice。　〃Up　there；　no　one　cares　what　side　of　the　sheets　you　were　born　on。　But　we're　home　now。　Here；　Chivalry's　son　is　not　a　Prince；　but　a　bastard。〃
　　　　　　　〃I　know　that。〃　I　was　stung　by　his　directness。　〃I've　known　it　all　my　life。　Lived　it　all　my　life。〃
　　　　　　　〃You　have；〃　he　conceded。　A　strange　look　stole　over　his　face；　a　smile　half…incredulous　and　half…proud。　〃So　why　are　you　demanding　reports　of　the　sergeant；　and　giving　out　mendations　as　briskly　as　if　you　were　Chivalry　himself？　I　scarce　believed　it；　how　you　spoke；　and　how　those　men　came　to　heel。　You　didn't　even　take　notice　of　how　they　responded　to　you；　you　didn't　even　realize　you'd　stepped　up　and　taken　mand　away　from　me。〃
　　　　　　　I　felt　a　slow　flush　creep　up　my　face。　All　in　the　Mountain　Kingdom　had　treated　me　as　if　I　were　a　Prince　in　fact；　instead　of　a　Prince's　bastard。　Had　I　so　quickly　accustomed　myself　to　that　higher　station？
　　　　　　　Burrich　chuckled　at　my　expression；　then　quickly　grew　sober。　〃Fitz；　you　need　to　find　your　caution　again。　Keep　your　eyes　down　and　don't　carry　your　head　like　a　young　stallion。　Regal　will　take　it　as　a　challenge；　and　that's　something　we　aren't　ready　to　face。　Not　yet。　Maybe　not　ever。〃
　　　　　　　I　nodded　grimly；　my　eyes　on　the　churned　snow　of　the　stable　yard。　I　had　bee　careless。　When　I　reported　to　Chade；　the　old　assassin　would　not　be　pleased　with　his　apprentice。　I　would　have　to　answer　for　it。　I　had　no　doubt　that　he　would　know　all　about　the　incident　at　the　gate　before　he　next　summoned　me。
　　　　　　　〃Don't　be　a　sluggard。　Get　down；　boy。〃　Burrich　interrupted　my　musings　abruptly。　I　jumped　to　his　tone　and　realized　that　he；　too；　was　having　to　readjust　to　our　parative　positions　at　Buckkeep。　How　many　years　had　I　been　his　stable　boy　and　ward？　Best　that　we　resume　those　roles　as　closely　as　possible。　It　would　save　kitchen　gossip。　I　dismounted　and；　leading　Sooty；　followed　Burrich　into　his　stables。
　　　　　　　Inside　it　was　warm　and　close。　The　blackness　and　cold　of　the　winter　night　were　shut　outside　the　thick　stone　walls。　Here　was　home；　the　lanterns　shone　yellow　and　the　stalled　horses　breathed　slow　and　deep。　But　as　Burrich　passed；　the　stables　came　to　life。　Not　a　horse　or　a　dog　in　the　whole　place　didn't　catch　his　scent　and　rouse　to　give　greeting。　The　stablemaster　was　home；　and　he　was　greeted　warmly　by　those　who　knew　him　best。　Two　stable　boys　soon　trailed　after　us；　rattling　off　simultaneously　every　bit　of　news　concerning　hawk　or　hound　or　horse；　Burrich　was　in　full　mand　here；　nodding　sagely　and　asking　a　terse　question　or　two　as　he　absorbed　every　detail。　His　reserve　only　broke　when　his　old　bitch　hound　Vixen　came　walking　stiff　to　greet　him。　He　went　down　on　one　knee　to　hug　and　thump　her　and　she　wiggled　puppyishly　and　tried　to　lick　his　face。　〃Now；　here's　a　real　dog；〃　he　greeted　her。　Then　he　stood　again；　to　continue　his　round。　She　followed　him；　hindquarters　wobbling　with　every　wag　of　her　tail。
　　　　　　　I　lagged　behind；　the　warmth　robbing　the　strength　from　my　limbs。　One　boy　came　hurrying　back　to　leave　a　lamp　with　me；　and　then　hastened　away　to　pay　court　to　Burrich。　I　came　to　Sooty's　stall　and　unlatched　the　door。　She　entered　eagerly；　snorting　her　appreciation。　I　set　my　light　on　its　shelf　and　looked　about　me。　Home。　This　was　home；　more　than　my　chamber　up　in　the　castle；　more　than　anywhere　else　in　the　world。　A　stall　in　Burrich's　stable；　safe　in　his　domain；　one　of　his　creatures。　If　only　I　could　turn　back　the　days；　and　burrow　into　the　deep　straw　and　drag　a　horse　blanket　over　my　head。
　　　　　　　Sooty　snorted　again；　this　time　rebukingly。　She'd　carried　me　all　those　days　and　ways；　and　deserved　every　fort　I　could　give　her。　But　every　buckle　resisted　my　numbed　and　weary　fingers。　I　dragged　the　saddle　down　from　her　back　and　very　nearly　dropped　it。　I　fumbled　at　her　bridle　endlessly；　the　bright　metal　of　the　buckles　dancing　before　my　eyes。　Finally　I　closed　them　and　let　my　fingers　work　alone　to　take　her　bridle　off。　When　I　opened　my　eyes；　Hands　was　at　my　elbow。　I　nodded　at　him；　and　the　bridle　dropped　from　my　lifeless　fingers。　He　glanced　at　it；　but　said　nothing。　Instead　he　poured　for　Sooty　the　bucket　of　fresh　water　he　had　brought；　and　shook　out　oats　for　her　and　fetched　an　armful　of　sweet　hay　with　much　green　still　to　it。　I　had　taken　down　Sooty's　brushes　when　he　reached　past　me　and　took　them　from　my　feeble　grip。　〃I'll　do　this；〃　he　said　quietly。
　　　　　　　〃Take　care　of　your　own　horse　first；〃　I　chided　him。
　　　　　　　〃I　already　did；　Fitz。　Look。　You　can't　do　a　good　job　on　her。　Let　me　do　it。　You　can　barely　stand　up。　Go　get　some　rest。〃　He　added；　almost　kindly；　〃Another　time；　when　we　ride；　you　can　do　Stoutheart　for　me。〃
　　　　　　　〃Burrich　will　have　my　hide　off　if　I　leave　my　animal's　care　for　someone　else。〃
　　　　　　　〃No；　he　won't。　He　wouldn't　leave　an　animal　in　the　care　of　someone　who　can　barely　stand；〃　Burrich　observed　from　outside　the　stall。　〃Leave　Sooty　to　Hands；　boy。　He　knows　his　job。　Hands；　take　charge　of　things　here　for　a　bit。　When　you've　done　with　Sooty；　check　on　that　one　spotted　mare　at　the　south　end　of　the　stables。　I　don't　know　who　owns　her　or　where　she　came　from；　but　she　looks　sick。　If　you　find　it　so；　have　the　boys　move　her　away　from　the　other　horses　and　scrub　out　the　stall　with　vinegar。　I'll　be　back　in　a　bit　after　I　see　FitzChivalry　to　his　quarters。　I'll　bring　you　food；　and　we'll　eat　in　my　room。　Oh。　Tell　a　boy　to　start　us　a　fire　there。　Probably　cold　as　a　cave　up　there。〃
　　　　　　　Hands　nodded；　already　busy　with　my　horse。　Sooty's　nose　was　in　her　oats。　Burrich　took　my　arm。　〃e　along；〃　he　said；　just　as　he　spoke　to　a　horse。　I　found　myself　unwillingly　leaning　on　him　as　we　walked　the　long　row　of　stalls。　At　the　door　he　picked　up　a　lantern。　The　night　seemed　colder　and　darker　after　the　warmth　of　the　stables。　As　we　walked　up　the　frozen　path　to　the　kitchens；　the　snow　began　falling　again。　My　mind　went　swirling　and　drifting　with　the　flakes。　I　wasn't　sure　where　my　feet　were。　〃It's　all　changed；　forever；　now；〃　I　observed　to　the　night。　My　words　whirled　away　with　the　snowflakes。
　　　　　　　〃What　has？〃　Burrich　asked　cautiously。　His　tone　bespoke　his　worry　that　I　might　be　getting　feverish　again。
　　　　　　　〃Everything。　How　you　treat　me。　When　you　aren't　thinking　about　it。　How　Hands　treats　me。　Two　years　ago　he　and　I　were　friends。　Just　two　boys　working　in　the　stables。　He'd　never　have　offered　to　brush　down　my　horse　for　me。　But　tonight；　he　treated　me　like　some　sickly　weakling　。。。　not　even　someone　he　can　insult　about　it。　Like　I　should　just　expect　him　to　do　things　like　that　for　me。　The　men　at　the　gate　didn't　even　know　me。　Even　you；　Burrich。　Six　months　or　a　year　ago；　if　I　took　sick；　you'd　have　dragged　me　up　to　your　loft　and　dosed　me　like　a　hound。　And　if　I'd　plained；　you'd　have　had　no　tolerance　for　it。　Now　you　walk　me　up　to　the　kitchen　doors　and…〃
　　　　　　　〃Stop　whining；〃　Burrich　said　gruffly。　〃Stop　plaining　and　stop　pitying　yourself。　If　Hands　looked　like　you　do；　you'd　do　the　same　for　him。〃　Almost　unwillingly　he　added；　〃Things　change；　because　time　passes。　Hands　hasn't　stopped　being　your　friend。　But　you　are　not　the　same　boy　who　left　Buckkeep　at　harvest　time。　That　Fitz　was　an　errand　boy　for　Verity；　and　had　been　my　stable　boy；　but　wasn't　much　more　than　that。　A　royal　bastard；　yes；　but　that　seemed　of　small　importance　to　any　save　me。　But　up　at　Jhaampe　in　the　Mountain　Kingdom；　you　showed　yourself　more　than　that。　It　doesn't　matter　if　your　face　is　pale；　or　if　you　can　barely　walk　after　a　day　in　the　saddle。　You　move　as　Chivalry's　son　should。　That　is　what　shows　in　your　bearing；　and　what　those　guards　responded　to。　And　Hands。〃　He　took　a　breath　and　paused　to　shoulder　the　heavy　kitchen　door　open。　〃And　I；　Eda　help　us　all；〃　he　added　in　a　mutter。
　　　　　　　But　then；　as　if　to　belie　his　own　words；　he　steered　me　into　the　watch　room　off　the　kitchen　and…unceremoniously　dumped　me　at　one　of　the　long　benches　beside　the　scarred　wooden　table。　The　watch　room　smelled　incredibly　good。　Here　was　where　any　soldier；　no　matter　how　muddy　or　snowy　or　drunk；