rz.thegunsofavalon-第28章
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He overcharged me； of course。 Since I was rational in all other matters； the alternative to psychosis would be that I was party to an expensive boondoggle。 While the ramifications must have intrigued him； he apparently decided not to look too far into such a sticky…seeming enterprise。 He was willing to seize every opportunity I extended for dissociating himself from the project。 Once he found the ammo people … a Swiss outfit as it turned out … he was quite willing to put me into contact with them and wash his hands of everything but the money。
Ganelon and I went to Switzerland on fake papers。 He was a German and I was Portuguese。 I did not especially care what my papers showed； so long as the forgery was of good quality； but I had settled on German as the best language for Ganelon to learn； since he had to learn one and German tourists have always seemed to be all over the place。 He picked it up quite rapidly。 I had told him to tell any real Germans and any Swiss who asked that he had been raised in Finland。
We spent three weeks in Switzerland before I was satisfied with the quality controls on my ammo。 As I had suspected； the stuff was totally inert in this shadow。 I had worked out the formula； though； which was all that really mattered at that point。 The silver came high； of course。 Perhaps I was being over…cautious。 Still； there are some things about Amber that are best dispatched with that metal； and I could afford it。 For that matter； what better bullet … short of gold … for a king？ Should I wind up shooting Eric； there would be no lese…majeste involved。 Indulge me； brothers。
Then I left Ganelon to shift for himself for a time； since he had thrown himself into his tourist role in a true Stanislavskian fashion。 I saw him off to Italy； camera about his neck and a faraway look in his eyes； and I flew back to the States。
Back？ Yes。 That run…down place on the hillside below me had been my home for the better part of a decade。 I had been heading toward it when I was forced off the road and into the accident which led to everything which has since occurred。
I drew on my cigarette and regarded the place。 It had not been run…down then。 I had always kept it in good shape。 The place had been pletely paid for。 Six rooms and an attached two…car garage。 Around seven acres。 The whole hillside； actually。 I had lived there alone most of the time。 I had liked it。 I had spent much of my time in the den and in my workshop。 I wondered whether the Mori woodcut still hung in my study。 Face to Face it was called； and it depicted two warriors in mortal bat。 It would be nice to have it back。 It would be gone； though； I felt。 Probably everything that had not been stolen had been sold for back taxes。 I imagined that was what the State of New York would do。 I was surprised that the house itself seemed not to have acquired new occupants。 I kept watching； to make certain。 Hell； I was in no hurry。 There was no place else I had to be。
I had contacted Gerard shortly after my arrival in Belgium。 I had decided against trying to talk with Benedict for the time being。 I was afraid that he would simply try to attack me； one way or the other； if I did。
Gerard had studied me quite carefully。 He was out somewhere in open country and he seemed to be alone。 〃Corwin？〃 he had said； then； 〃Yes。。。〃
〃Right。 What happened with Benedict？〃
〃I found him as you said he would be and I released him。 He was set to pursue you once again； but I was able to persuade him that a considerable time had passed since I had seen you。 Since you said you had left him unconscious； I figured that was the best line to take。 Also； his horse was very tired。 We went back to Avalon together。 I remained with him through the funerals； then borrowed a horse。 I am on my way back to Amber now。〃
〃Funerals？ What funerals？〃
Again； that calculating look。
〃You really do not know？〃 he said。
〃If I knew； damn it； I would not ask！〃
〃His servants。 They were murdered。 He says you did it。〃
〃No；〃 I said。 〃No。 That is ridiculous。 Why should I want to murder his servants？ I do not understand。。。〃
〃It was not long after his return that he went looking for them； as they were not on hand to wele him。 He found them murdered and you and your panion gone。〃
〃Now I see how it looked；〃 I said。 〃Where were the bodies？〃
〃Buried； but not too deeply； in the little wood behind the garden to the rear of the house。〃
Just so； just so。。。 Better not to mention I had known about the grave。
〃But what possible reason does he think I could have for doing such a thing？〃 I protested。
〃He is puzzled； Corwin。 Very puzzled； now。 He could not understand why you did not kill him when you had the chance； and why you sent for me when you could have just left him there。〃
〃I see now why he kept calling me a murderer as we fought； but … Did you tell him what I said about not having slain anyone？〃
〃Yes。 At first he shrugged it off as a self…serving statement。 I told him you sounded sincere； and very puzzled yourself。 I believe it bothered him a bit that you should be so insistent。 He asked me several times whether I believed you。〃
〃Do you？〃
He dropped his eyes。
〃Damn it； Corwin！ What am I supposed to believe？ I came into the middle of this。 We have been apart for so long。。。〃
He met my gaze。
〃There is more to it；〃 he said。
〃What is that？〃
〃Why did you call me to help him？ That was a plete deck you took。 You could have called any of us。〃
〃You must be joking；〃 I said。
〃No； I want an answer。〃
〃Very well。 You are the only other one I trust。〃
〃Is that all？〃
〃No。 Benedict does not want his whereabouts known back in Amber。 You and Julian are the only two I know for certain to be aware of his location。 I don't like Julian； I don't trust him。 So I called you。〃
〃How did you know that Julian and I knew about him？〃
〃He helped you both out when you ran into trouble on the black road awhile back； and he put you up while you recuperated。 Dara told me about it。〃
〃Dara？ Who is this Dara anyway？〃
〃The orphaned daughter of a couple who once worked for Benedict；〃 I said。 〃She was around when you and Julian were there。〃
〃And you sent her a bracelet。 You also mentioned her to me by the road； back when you summoned me。〃
〃Correct。 What is the matter？〃
〃Nothing。 I do not really remember her； though。 Tell me； why did you leave so suddenly？ You have to admit； it seemed the act of a guilty man。〃
〃Yes；〃 I said； 〃I was guilty … but not of murder。 I went to Avalon to obtain something that I wanted； I got it； and I cleared out。 You saw that wagon； and you saw that I had a cargo in it。 I got out before he returned to keep from answering questions Benedict might ask me about it。 Hell！ If I just wanted to run； I wouldn't go dragging a wagon along behind me！ I'd have traveled on horseback； fast and light。〃
〃What was in the wagon？〃
〃No；〃 I said。 〃I did not want to tell Benedict and I do not want to tell you。 Oh； he can find out； I suppose。 But let him do it the hard way； if he must。 It is immaterial； though。 The fact I went there for something and really obtained it should be sufficient。 It is not especially valuable there； but is in another place。 Fair enough？〃
〃Yes；〃 he said。 〃It does make a kind of sense。〃
〃Then answer my question。 Do you think I murdered them？〃
〃No；〃 he said。 〃I believe you。〃
〃What about Benedict； now？ What does he think？〃
〃He would not attack you again without talking first。 There is doubt in his mind； I know that。〃
〃Good。 That's something； anyway。 Thank you； Gerard。 I am going away now。〃 I moved to break the contact。
〃Wait； Corwin！ Wait！〃
〃What is it？〃
〃How did you cut the black road？ You destroyed a section of it at the place you crossed over。 How did you do it？〃
〃The Pattern；〃 I said。 〃If you ever get in trouble with that thing； hit it with the Pattern。 You know how you have to sometimes hold it in your mind if shadows begin to run away from you and things start going wild？〃
〃Yes。 I tried that and it didn't work。 All I got was a headache。 It is not of Shadow。〃
〃Yes and no；〃 I said。 〃I know what it is。 You did not try hard enough。 I used the Pattern until my head felt as if it were being torn apart； until I was half blind from the pain and about ready to pass out。 Then the road came apart about me instead。 It was no fun； but it did work。〃
〃I will remember；〃 he said。 〃Are you going to talk to Benedict now？〃
〃No；〃 I said。 〃He already has everything we've gone over。 Now that he is cooling off； he will begin pushing the facts around some more。 I would just as soon he do it on his own … and I do not want to risk another fight。 When I close this time I will be silent for a long while。 I will resist all efforts to municate with me； also。〃
〃What of Amber； Corwin？ What of Amber？〃
I dropped my eyes。
〃Don't get in my way when I e back； Gerard。 Believe me； it will be no contest。〃
〃Corwin。。。 Wait。 I'd like to ask you to reconsider。 Do not hit Amber now。 She is weak in all the wrong ways。〃
〃I am sorry； Gerard。 But I am certain I have given the matter more thought during the past five years than all the rest of you put together。〃
〃I am sorry； too； then。〃
〃I guess I had better be going now。〃
He nodded。
〃Good…by； Corwin。〃
〃Good…by； Gerard。〃
After waiting several hours for the sun to disappear behind the hill； leaving the house in a premature twilight； I mashed a final cigarette； shook out my jacket and donned it； rose to my feet。 There had been no signs of life about the place； no movement behind the dirty windows； the broken window。 Slowly； I descended the hill。
Flora's place out in Westchester had been sold some years before； which came as no surprise to me。 I had checked merely as a matter of curiosity； since I was back in town。 Had even driven past the place once。 There was no reason for her to remain on this shadow Earth。 Her long wardenship having ended successfully； she was being rewarded in Amber the last time I had seen her。 To have been so near for as long as I had without even realizing her presence was a thing I found somewhat galling。
I had debated contacting Random； decided against it。 The only way he could possibly benefit me would be with information as to current affairs in Amber。 While this would be nice to have； it was not absolutely essential。 I was fairly certain that I could trust him。 After all； he had been of some assistance to me in the past。 Admitted； it was hardly altruism … but still； he had gone a bit further than he had had to。 It was five years ago； though； and a lot had happened since。 He was being tolerated around Amber again； and he had a wife now。 He might be eager to gain a little standing。 I just did not know。 But weighing the possible benefits against the possible losses； I thought it better to wait and see him personally the next time I was in town。
I had kept my word and resisted all attempts to make contact with me。 They had e almost daily during my first two weeks back on the shadow Earth。 Several weeks had passed； though； and I had not been troubled since。 Why should I give anyone a free shot at my thinking machinery？ No thanks； brothers。
I advanced upon the rear of the house； sidled up to a window； wiped it with my elbow。 I had been wat
