cpike.thelastvampire-第15章

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　〃You　are　not　being　pletely　honest　with　me。〃
　〃I'm　telling　you　what　I　can。〃
　〃When　you　say　my　father　is　in　danger；　what　exactly　do　you　mean？　Would　this　man　kill　my　father？〃
　〃He　has　killed　in　the　past。〃
　The　space　inside　the　car　is　suddenly　cramped。　Ray　hears　beyond　my　words。　〃Is　my　father　dead　already？〃　he　asks　quietly。
　I　have　to　lie；　I　have　no　choice。　〃I　don't　know。〃
　We　arrive　at　my　house。　No　one　has　e　while　I　was　away；　I　can　tell。　I　activate　the　security　system。　It　is　the　most　elaborate　available　on　the　market。　Every　wire　of　every　section　of　fence　around　my　house　is　now　heavily　electrified。　There　are　motion　sensors　and　laser　beams　and　radar　tracking　the　perimeter。　I　know　it　will　not　stop　Yaksha　for　a　second　if　he　wishes　to　e　for　me。　At　a　minimum　he　has　twice　my　strength　and　speed。　In　reality　I　think　he　is　much　more　powerful　than　that。
　Ray　wanders　around　my　house；　taking　in　the　sights。　He　pauses　and　looks　out　over　the　ocean。　A　waning　moon；　half　full；　hangs　over　the　dark　shadow　of　the　water。　We　face　west；　but　behind　us；　in　the　east；　I　detect　a　hint　of　dawn。
　〃What　next？〃　he　asks。
　〃What　do　you　want　to　do　next？〃
　He　faces　me。　〃You　are　waiting　for　this　man　to　e　here。〃
　〃Perhaps。　He　could　e。〃
　〃You　said　something　about　arming　yourself。　Do　you　have　guns　here？〃
　〃Yes。　But　I'm　not　going　to　give　you　one。　It　would　not　help。〃
　〃Are　you　some　kind　of　expert　with　guns？〃
　〃Yes。〃
　He　is　exasperated。　〃Who　the　hell　are　you；　Sita？　If　that　is　even　your　real　name。〃
　〃It　is　my　real　name。　Few　people　know　it。　It　is　the　name　my　father　gave　me。　The　man　I　am　talking　about…he　is　the　one　who　murdered　my　father。〃
　〃Why　don't　we　call　the　police？〃
　〃This　man　is　very　powerful。　He　has　almost　unlimited　resources。　The　police　would　not　be　able　to　stop　him　if　he　wants　to　hurt　us。〃
　〃Then　how　are　you　going　to　stop　him？〃
　〃I　don't　know　if　I　can。〃
　〃Then　why　are　we　here？　Why　don't　we　just　get　in　the　car　and　drive　away？〃
　His　question　is　an　interesting　one；　it　has　a　certain　logic　to　it。　I　have　considered　the　option　since　disposing　of　Slim。　Yet　I　do　not　believe　that　I　can　run　successfully　from　Yaksha；　not　once　he　has　got　me　in　his　sights；　which　he　obviously　does。　I　do　not　like　to　postpone　the　inevitable。
　〃You　can　drive　away　if　you　want；〃　I　say。　〃You　can　take　my　car　and　go　home。　Or　you　can　take　my　car　and　drive　to　Los　Angeles。　That　might　be　the　best　thing　for　you　to　do。　I　can　tell　you　for　a　fact　that　while　you　are　here　you　are　in　extreme　danger。〃
　〃Then　why　did　you　bring　me　here？〃
　I　turn　away。　〃I　do　not　know　why。　But　I　think…I　don't　know。〃
　〃What？〃
　〃This　man…his　real　name　is　Yaksha…he　knows　you　are　my　friend。　You　are　part　of　the　equation　that　deals　with　me…in　his　mind。〃
　〃What　do　you　mean？〃
　I　turn　back　to　Ray。　〃He　has　been　watching　me　since　I　saw　your　father；　I'm　sure　of　it。　But　he　has　not　e　for　me　personally。　Oh；　he　sent　his　people　after　me；　but　that　is　not　the　same　thing；　not　to　him　and　not　to　me。〃
　〃You　think　that　I　afford　you　some　protection？〃
　〃Not　exactly。　More；　I　think　he　is　curious　about　my　relationship　with　you。〃
　〃Why？〃
　〃I　do　not　make　friends　easily。　He　knows　that　much。〃
　Ray　sighs。　〃I　don't　even　know　if　I　am　your　friend。〃
　His　words　sting；　more　than　the　bullet　I　was　hit　with　earlier　in　the　night。　I　reach　out　and　touch　his　face。　Such　a　beautiful　face；　so　like　Rama's；　even　though　they　do　not　look　that　much　alike。　Their　essence　is　similar。　Maybe　Krishna　was　right。　Maybe　their　souls　are　the　same；　if　there　are　such　things。　I　doubt　I　have　one。
　〃I　care　more　for　you　than　I　have　cared　for　anyone　in　a　long　time；〃　I　say。　〃I　am　much　older　than　I　look。　I　have　been　more　lonely　than　I　have　been　willing　to　admit　to　myself。　But　when　I　met　you；　that　loneliness　eased。　I　am　your　friend；　Ray；　even　if　you　do　not　want　to　be　mine。〃
　He　stares　at　me；　as　if　he；　too；　knows　me；　then　lowers　his　lips　to　kiss　my　hand　that　touches　him。　His　next　words　e　to　me　as　if　from　far　away。
　〃Sometimes　I　look　at　you　and　you　do　not　look　human。〃
　〃Yes。〃
　〃You're　like　something　carved　from　glass。〃
　〃Yes。〃
　〃Old　but　always　new。〃
　〃Yes。〃
　〃You　said　you　are　a　vampire。〃
　〃Yes。〃
　But　he　does　not　ask　me　if　I　am　a　vampire。　He　knows　better。　He　knows　I　will　tell　him　the　truth；　and　he　does　not　want　to　hear　it。　He　kisses　my　hand　again；　and　I　lean　forward　to　kiss　his　lips。　Long　and　deep…he　does　not　smother　this　time　and　I　am　glad。　He　wants　to　make　love；　I　can　tell；　and　I　am　very　glad。
　I　start　a　roaring　blaze　in　the　living　room　fireplace；　many　logs　piled　high。　There　is　a　rug　from　ancient　Persia　on　top　of　the　wall…to…wall　carpeting　in　front　of　the　fire；　it　is　where　I　sometimes　sleep；　when　the　sun　is　high。　I　bring　in　blankets　and　pillows。　We　undress　slowly；　I　let　Ray　take　off　my　clothes。　He　touches　my　body；　and　I　kiss　his　from　head　to　foot。　Then　we　lie　down　together　and　the　sex　is　a　wonder　to　him；　as　well　as　to　me。　I　am　careful　not　to　hurt　him。
　Later；　when　he　is　asleep；　I　go　for　an　automatic　weapon　in　the　attic。　I　load　the　clip　carefully；　making　sure　all　the　parts　are　well　oiled；　ready　for　use。　Then　I　return　to　Ray's　side　and　put　the　weapon　under　my　pillow。　Ray　is　exhausted；　I　stroke　his　head　and　whisper　words　that　will　cause　him　to　sleep　away　the　entire　day。　I　suspect　Yaksha　will　not　e　until　the　following　night…a　fresh　night　for　a　fresh　slaughter。　It　would　be　his　way。　I　know　my　gun　will　not　stop　him。　I　have　only　Krishna's　promise　to　protect　me。　But　what　is　the　promise　of　a　God　I　don't　even　know　if　I　believe　in？
　Yet　one　thing　is　certain。　If　Krishna　was　not　God；　he　was　the　most　extraordinary　human　who　ever　lived。　Even　more　powerful　than　all　the　vampires　bined。　I　think　of　him　as　I　lie　beside　Ray；　and　I　wonder　about　my　feelings　of　love　for　the　boy。　If　they　are　just　my　longing　for　the　face　of　Krishna　hidden　inside　him。　I　do　remember　Krishna's　face　well。　It　was　a　face　that　would　be　impossible　to　forget　even　after　five　thousand　years。
　
　
　9
　
　
　Once　more；　I　go　back。　We　left　the　area；　Yaksha　and　I。　We　were　quickly　joined　by　two　of　the　men　from　the　village　who　had　disappeared。　They　were　vampires。　I　was　a　vampire。　But　that　word　did　not　exist　then。　I　didn't　know　what　I　was；　except　somehow　I　was　like　Yaksha。
　The　horror　and　the　wonder　of　it　all。
　My　craving　for　blood　did　not　e　over　me　in　the　first　days；　and　Yaksha　must　have　told　the　others　not　to　speak　to　me　about　it；　because　they　did　not。　But　I　did　notice　that　bright　light　bothered　me。　The　rays　of　the　midday　sun　were　almost　intolerable。　This　I　understood。　Because　when　we　were　growing　up；　I　had　noticed　that　Yaksha　had　a　tendency　to　disappear　in　the　middle　of　the　day。　It　saddened　me　that　I　would　never　again　enjoy　a　wonderful　daytime　sky。
　Yet　the　nights；　they　became　a　thing　of　great　beauty。　For　I　could　see　in　the　dark　better　than　I　had　been　able　to　see　in　the　day。　I　would　look　up　at　the　moon　and　see　that　it　was　not　the　smooth　orb　we　had　all　believed；　but　a　pitted　and　scarred　world　with　no　air。　Distant　objects　would　appear　before　me　as　if　only　an　arm's　length　away。　I　could　see　detail　I　had　never　imagined　before：　the　pores　of　my　skin；　the　multifaceted　eyes　of　tiny　insects。　Sound；　even　on　a　supposedly　silent　plain；　became　a　constant。　I　quickly　became　sensitive　to　the　breathing　patterns　of　different　people。　What　each　rhythm　meant；　how　it　corresponded　to　different　emotions。　My　sense　of　smell　took　on　an　incredible　vitality。　With　just　a　slight　shift　of　the　breeze　the　world　was　constantly　bathed　in　new　perfumes。
　My　newfound　strength　I　loved　most　of　all。　I　could　leap　to　the　top　of　the　tallest　tree；　crumble　huge　boulders　with　a　clap　of　my　hands。　I　loved　to　chase　the　animals；　especially　the　lions　and　tigers。　They　ran　from　me。　They　knew　there　was　something　inhuman　about　me。
　But　my　blood　hunger　came　over　me　quickly。　On　the　fourth　day　I　went　to　Yaksha　and　told　him　my　chest　was　on　fire　and　my　heart　was　pounding　in　my　ears。　Honestly；　I　thought　I　was　dying…I　kept　thinking　about　bleeding　things。　Yet　I　did　not　think　of　drinking　blood；　it　was　too　impossible　an　idea。　Even　when　Yaksha　told　me　it　was　the　only　way　to　stop　the　pain；　I　pushed　it　out　of　my　mind。　Because　even　though　I　was　no　longer　human；　I　wanted　to　pretend　I　was。　When　Yaksha　had　held　me　that　long　night；　I　felt　myself　die。　Yet　I　imagined　that　I　was　alive　as　others　were　alive。　But　the　life　in　me　was　not　from　this　world。　I　could　live　off　that　life；　but　I　could　never　give　in　to　it。　Yaksha　told　me　I　was　sterile　at　the　same　time　he　told　me　about　the　blood。　It　made　me　cry　for　Lalita　and　Rama　and　wonder　how　they　were　doing　without　their　Sita。
　But　I　would　not　go　to　see　them。
　I　would　not　let　them　see　the　monster　I　had　bee。
　I　feared　I　would　make　them　vampires；　too。
　I　resisted　drinking　another's　blood；　until　pain　was　all　I　knew。　I　grew　weak；　I　couldn't　stop　moaning。　It　was　as　if　because　I　would　not　drink　another's　blood；　then　the　thing　Yaksha　had　put　inside　me　would　eat　me　alive。　A　month　after　my　transformation；　Yaksha　brought　me　a　half…conscious　boy；　with　his　neck　veins　already　partially　open；　and　ordered　me　to　drink。　How　I　hated　him　then　for　putting　such　temptation　in　front　of　me。　How　it　rekindled　in　me　my　hatred　for　how　he　had　taken　me　from　Rama　and　Lalita。　Yet　my　hate　did　not　give　me　strength　because　it　was　not　a　pure　thing。　I　needed　Yaksha　after　he　changed　me；　and　need　is　a　close　kin　of　love。　But　I　would　not　say　I　ever　loved　Yaksha；　rather；　I　looked　up　to　him　because　he　was　greater　than　I　was。　For　a　long　time　he　was　the　only　one　to　look　up　to…until　Krishna。
　Yet　I　drank　the　boy's　blood。　I　fell　upon　him　even　as　I　swooned。　And　even　though　I　resolved　not　to　kill　him；　I　couldn't　stop　drinking　once　I　started。　Then　the　boy　was　dead。　I　cried　in　horror　as　he　took　his　last　breath　in　my　arms。　But　Yaksha　just　laughed。　He　said　that　once　you　killed；　it　was　easy　to　kill　again。
　Yes；　I　hated　him　then　because　I　knew　he　was　right。
　After　that；　I　killed　many；　and　I　grew　to　love　it。
　The　years　went　by。　We　headed　southeast。　We　never　stopped　moving。　It　never　took　that　long　for　people　in　a　village　to　realize　we　were　dangerous。　We　came；　we　made　friends…eventually　we　slew；　and　the　rumors　went　before　us。　We　also　made　more　of　our　kind。　The　first　vampire　I　created　was　a　girl　my　age；　with　large　dark　eyes　and　hair　like　a　waterfall　made　from　the　light　of　the　midnight　sky。　I　imagined　she　could　bee　a　friend；　even　though　I　took　her　against　her　will。　By　then　Yaksha　had　told　me　what　was　necessary：　the　lifting　out　of　my　vein　ing　from　my　heart；　the　merger　of　her　vein　going　back　to　the　heart；　the　transfusion；　the　terror；　the　ecstasy。　Her　name　was　Mataji；　and　she　never　thanked　me　for　what　I　did　to　her；　but　she　stayed　close　in　the　years　to　e。
　Making　Mataji　drained　my　strength；　and　it　was　several　days　and　many　victims　later　before　I　regained　my　full　powers。　It　was　the　same　for　all　of　us　except　Yaksha。　When　he　created　another；　he　just　grew　stronger。　I　knew　it　was　because　it　was　his　soul　that　fed　us　all。　The　yakshini　embodied。　The　demon　from　the　deep。
　Yet　there　was　kindness　in　him；　but　I　couldn't　understand　its　source。　He　was　protective　of　all　he　created；　and　he　was　unusually　nice　to　me。　He　never　again　told　me　that　he　loved　me；　however；　but　he　did。　His　eyes　were　often　on　me。　What　was　I　supposed　to　do？　The　damned　could　not　marry。　God　would　not　w