grrm.astormofswords-第81章

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　〃Why　not？〃　Grenn　sounded　honestly　puzzled。　〃It's　a　good　name；　and　you　came　by　it　fairly。〃
　Pyp　always　teased　Grenn　about　being　thick　as　a　castle　wall；　so　Sam　explained　patiently。　〃It's　just　a　different　way　of　calling　me　a　coward；〃　he　said；　standing　on　his　left　leg　and　wriggling　back　into　his　muddy　boot。　〃They're　mocking　me；　the　same　way　they　mock　Bedwyck　by　calling　him　'Giant。〃'
　〃He's　not　a　giant；　though；〃　said　Grenn；　〃and　Paul　was　never　small。　Well；　maybe　when　he　was　a　babe　at　the　breast；　but　not　after。　You　did　slay　the　Other；　though；　so　it's　not　the　same。〃
　〃I　just　。　。　。　I　never　。　。　。　I　was　seared！〃
　〃No　more　than　me。　It's　only　Pyp　who　says　I'm　too　dumb　to　be　frightened。　I　get　as　frightened　as　anyone。〃　Grenn　bent　to　scoop　up　a　split　log；　and　tossed　it　into　the　fire。　〃I　used　to　be　scared　of　Jon；　whenever　I　had　to　fight　him。　He　was　so　quick；　and　he　fought　like　he　meant　to　kill　me。〃　The　green　damp　wood　sat　in　the　flames；　smoking　before　it　took　fire。　〃I　never　said；　though。　Sometimes　I　think　everyone　is　just　pretending　to　be　brave；　and　none　of　us　really　are。　Maybe　pretending　is　how　you　get　brave；　I　don't　know。　Let　them　call　you　Slayer；　who　cares？〃
　〃You　never　liked　Ser　Alliser　to　call　you　Aurochs。〃
　〃He　was　saying　I　was　big　and　stupid。〃　Grenn　scratched　at　his　beard。　〃If　Pyp　wanted　to　call　me　Aurochs；　though；　he　could。　Or　you；　or　Jon。　An　aurochs　is　a　fierce　strong　beast；　so　that's　not　so　bad；　and　I　am　big；　and　getting　bigger。　Wouldn't　you　rather　be　Sam　the　Slayer　than　Ser　Piggy？〃
　〃Why　can't　I　just　be　Samwell　Tarly？〃　He　sat　down　heavily　on　a　wet　log　that　Grenn　had　yet　to　split。　〃It　was　the　dragonglass　that　slew　it。　Not　me；　the　dragonglass。〃
　He　had　told　them。　He　had　told　them　all。　Some　of　them　didn't　believe　him；　he　knew。　Dirk　had　shown　Sam　his　dirk　and　said；　〃I　got　iron；　what　do　I　want　with　glass？〃　Black　Bernarr　and　the　three　Garths　made　it　plain　that　they　doubted　his　whole　story；　and　Rolley　of　Sisterton　came　right　out　and　said；　〃More　like　you　stabbed　some　rustling　bushes　and　it　turned　out　to　be　Small　Paul　taking　a　shit；　so　you　came　up　with　a　lie。〃
　But　Dywen　listened；　and　Dolorous　Edd；　and　they　made　Sam　and　Grenn　tell　the　Lord　mander。　Mormont　frowned　all　through　the　tale　and　asked　pointed　questions；　but　he　was　too　cautious　a　man　to　shun　any　possible　advantage。　He　asked　Sam　for　all　the　dragonglass　in　his　pack；　though　that　was　little　enough。　Whenever　Sam　thought　of　the　cache　Jon　had　found　buried　beneath　the　Fist；　it　made　him　want　to　cry。　There'd　been　dagger　blades　and　spearheads；　and　two　or　three　hundred　arrowheads　at　least。　Jon　had　made　daggers　for　himself；　Sam；　and　Lord　mander　Mormont；　and　he'd　given　Sam　a　spearhead；　an　old　broken　horn；　and　some　arrowheads。　Grenn　had　taken　a　handful　of　arrowheads　as　well；　but　that　was　all。
　So　now　all　they　had　was　Mormont's　dagger　and　the　one　Sam　had　given　Grenn；　plus　nineteen　arrows　and　a　tall　hardwood　spear　with　a　black　dragonglass　head。　The　sentries　passed　the　spear　along　from　watch　to　watch；　while　Mormont　had　divided　the　arrows　among　his　best　bowmen。　Muttering　Bill；　Garth　Greyfeather；　Ronnel　Harclay；　Sweet　Donnel　Hill；　and　Alan　of　Rosby　had　three　apiece；　and　Ulmer　had　four。　But　even　if　they　made　every　shaft　tell；　they'd　soon　be　down　to　fire　arrows　like　all　the　rest。　They　had　loosed　hundreds　of　fire　arrows　on　the　Fist；　yet　still　the　wights　kept　ing。
　It　will　not　be　enough；　Sam　thought。　Craster's　sloping　palisades　of　mud　and　melting　snow　would　hardly　slow　the　wights；　who'd　climbed　the　much　steeper　slopes　of　the　Fist　to　swarm　over　the　ringwall。　And　instead　of　three　hundred　brothers　drawn　up　in　disciplined　ranks　to　meet　them；　the　wights　would　find　forty…one　ragged　survivors；　nine　too　badly　hurt　to　fight。　Forty…four　had　e　straggling　into　Craster's　out　of　the　storm；　out　of　the　sixty…odd　who'd　cut　their　way　free　of　the　Fist；　but　three　of　those　had　died　of　their　wounds；　and　Bannen　would　soon　make　four。
　〃Do　you　think　the　wights　are　gone？〃　Sam　asked　Grenn。　〃Why　don't　they　e　finish　us？〃
　〃They　only　e　when　it's　cold。〃
　〃Yes；〃　said　Sam；　〃but　is　it　the　cold　that　brings　the　wights；　or　the　wights　that　bring　the　cold？〃
　〃Who　cares？〃　Grenn's　axe　sent　wood　chips　flying。　〃They　e　together；　that's　what　matters。　Hey；　now　that　we　know　that　dragonglass　kills　them；　maybe　they　won't　e　at　all。　Maybe　they're　frightened　of　us　now！〃
　Sam　wished　he　could　believe　that；　but　it　seemed　to　him　that　when　you　were　dead；　fear　had　no　more　meaning　than　pain　or　love　or　duty。　He　wrapped　his　hands　around　his　legs；　sweating　under　his　layers　of　wool　and　leather　and　fur。　The　dragonglass　dagger　had　melted　the　pale　thing　in　the　woods；　true　。　。　。　but　Grenn　was　talking　like　it　would　do　the　same　to　the　wights。　We　don't　know　that；　he　thought。　We　don't　know　anything；　really。　I　wish　Jon　was　here。　He　liked　Grenn；　but　he　couldn't　talk　to　him　the　same　way。　Jon　wouldn't　call　me　Slayer；　I　know　And　I　could　talk　to　him　about　Gilly's　baby。　Jon　had　ridden　off　with　Qhorin　Halfhand；　though；　and　they'd　had　no　word　of　him　since。　He　had　a　dragonglass　dagger　too；　but　did　he　think　to　use　it？　Is　he　lying　dead　and　frozen　in　some　ravine　。　。　。　or　worse；　is　he　dead　and　walking？
　He　could　not　understand　why　the　gods　would　want　to　take　Jon　Snow　and　Barmen　and　leave　him；　craven　and　clumsy　as　he　was。　He　should　have　died　on　the　Fist；　where　he'd　pissed　himself　three　times　and　lost　his　sword　besides。　And　he　would　have　died　in　the　woods　if　Small　Paul　had　not　e　along　to　carry　him。　I　wish　it　was　all　a　dream。　Then　I　could　wake　up。　How　flne　that　would　be；　to　wake　back　on　the　Fist　of　the　First　Men　with　all　his　brothers　still　around　him；　even　Jon　and　Ghost。　Or　even　better；　to　wake　in　Castle　Black　behind　the　Wall　and　go　to　the　mon　room　for　a　bowl　of　Three…Finger　Hobb's　thick　cream　of　wheat；　with　a　big　spoon　of　butter　melting　in　the　middle　and　a　dollop　of　honey　besides。　just　the　thought　of　it　made　his　empty　stomach　rumble。
　〃Snow。〃
　Sam　glanced　up　at　the　sound。　Lord　mander　Mormont's　raven　was　circling　the　fire；　beating　the　air　with　wide　black　wings。
　〃Snow；〃　the　bird　cawed。　〃Snow；　snow〃
　Wherever　the　raven　went；　Mormont　soon　followed。　The　Lord　mander　emerged　from　beneath　the　trees；　mounted　on　his　garron　between　old　Dywen　and　the　fox…faced　ranger　Ronnel　Harclay；　who'd　been　raised　to　Thoren　Smallwood's　place。　The　spearmen　at　the　gate　shouted　a　challenge；　and　the　Old　Bear　returned　a　gruff；　〃Who　in　seven　hells　do　you　think　goes　there？　Did　the　Others　take　your　eyes？〃　He　rode　between　the　gateposts；　one　bearing　a　ram's　skull　and　the　other　the　skull　of　a　bear；　then　reined　up；　raised　a　fist；　and　whistled。　The　raven　came　flapping　down　at　his　call。
　〃My　lord；〃　Sam　heard　Ronnel　Harclay　say；　〃we　have　only　twenty…two　mounts；　and　I　doubt　half　will　reach　the　Wall。〃
　〃I　know　that；〃　Mormont　grumbled。　〃We　must　go　all　the　same。　Craster's　made　that　plain。〃　He　glanced　to　the　west；　where　a　bank　of　dark　clouds　hid　the　sun。　〃The　gods　gave　us　a　respite；　but　for　how　long？〃　Mormont　swung　down　from　the　saddle；　jolting　his　raven　back　into　the　air。　He　saw　Sam　then；　and　bellowed；　〃Tarly！〃
　〃Me？〃　Sam　got　awkwardly　to　his　feet。
　〃Me？〃　The　raven　landed　on　the　old　man's　head。　〃Me？〃
　〃Is　your　name　Tarly？　Do　you　have　a　brother　hereabouts？　Yes；　you。　Close　your　mouth　and　e　with　me。〃
　〃With　you？〃　The　words　tumbled　out　in　a　squeak。
　Lord　mander　Mormont　gave　him　a　withering　look。　〃You　are　a　man　of　the　Night's　Watch。　Try　not　to　soil　your　smallclothes　every　time　I　look　at　you。　e；　I　said。〃　His　boots　made　squishing　sounds　in　the　mud；　and　Sam　had　to　hurry　to　keep　up。　〃I've　been　thinking　about　this　dragonglass　of　yours。〃
　〃It's　not　mine；〃　Sam　said。
　〃Jon　Snow's　dragonglass；　then。　if　dragonglass　daggers　are　what　we　need；　why　do　we　have　only　two　of　them？　Every　man　on　the　Wall　should　be　armed　with　one　the　day　he　says　his　words。〃
　〃We　never　knew　。　。　。〃
　〃We　never　knew！　But　we　must　have　known　once。　The　Night's　Watch　has　forgotten　its　true　purpose；　Tarly。　You　don't　build　a　wall　seven　hundred　feet　high　to　keep　savages　in　skins　from　stealing　women。　The　Wall　was　made　to　guard　the　realms　of　men　。　。　。　and　not　against　other　men；　which　is　all　the　wildlings　are　when　you　e　right　down　to　it。　Too　many　years；　Tarly；　too　many　hundreds　and　thousands　of　years。　We　lost　sight　of　the　true　enemy。　And　now　he's　here；　but　we　don't　know　how　to　fight　him。　Is　dragonglass　made　by　dragons；　as　the　smallfolk　like　to　say？〃
　〃The　m…maesters　think　not；〃　Sam　stammered。　〃The　maesters　say　it　es　from　the　fires　of　the　earth。　They　call　it　obsidian。〃
　Mormont　snorted。　〃They　can　call　it　lemon　pie　for　all　I　care。　If　it　kills　as　you　claim；　I　want　more　of　it。〃
　Sam　stumbled。　〃Jon　found　more；　on　the　Fist。　Hundreds　of　arrowheads；　spearheads　as　well　。　。　。〃
　〃So　you　said。　Small　good　it　does　us　there。　To　reach　the　Fist　again　we'd　need　to　be　armed　with　the　weapons　we　won't　have　until　we　reach　the　bloody　Fist。　And　there　are　still　the　wildlings　to　deal　with。　We　need　to　find　dragonglass　someplace　else。〃
　Sam　had　almost　forgotten　about　the　wildlings；　so　much　had　happened　since。　〃The　children　of　the　forest　used　dragonglass　blades；〃　he　said。　〃They'd　know　where　to　find　obsidian。〃
　〃The　children　of　the　forest　are　all　dead；〃　said　Mormont。　〃The　First　Men　killed　half　of　them　with　bronze　blades；　and　the　Andals　finished　the　job　with　iron。　Why　a　glass　dagger　should…〃
　The　Old　Bear　broke　off　as　Craster　emerged　from　between　the　deerhide　flaps　of　his　door。　The　wildling　smiled；　revealing　a　mouth　of　brown　rotten　teeth。　〃I　have　a　son。〃
　〃Son；〃　cawed　Mormont's　raven。　〃Son；　son；　son。〃
　The　Lord　mander's　face　was　stiff。　〃I'm　glad　for　you。〃
　〃Are　you；　now？　Me；　I'll　be　glad　when　you　and　yours　are　gone。　Past　time；　I'm　thinking。〃
　〃As　soon　as　our　wounded　are　strong　enough　。　。　。〃
　〃They're　strong　as　they're　like　to　get；　old　crow；　and　both　of　us　know　it。　Them　that's　dying；　you　know　them　too；　cut　their　bloody　throats　and　be　done　with　it。　Or　leave　them；　if　you　don't　have　the　stomach；　and　I'll　sort　them　out　myself。〃
　Lord　mander　Mormont　bristled。　〃Thoren　Smallwood　claimed　you　were　a　friend　to　the　Watch…〃
　〃Aye；〃　said　Craster。　〃I　gave　you　all　I　could　spare；　but　winter's　ing　on；　and　now　the　girl's　stuck　me　with　another　squalling　mouth　to　feed。〃
　〃We　could　take　him；〃　someone　squeaked。
　Craster's　head　turned。　His　eyes　narrowed。　He　spat　on　Sam's　foot。　〃What　did　you　say；　Slayer？〃
　Sam　opened　and　closed　his　mouth。　〃I　。　。　。　I　。　。　。　I　only　meant　。　。　。　if　you　didn't　want　him　。　。　。　his　mouth　to　feed　。　。　。　with　winter　ing　on；　we　。　。　。　we　could　take　him；　and　。　。　。〃
　〃My　son。　My　blood。　You　think　I'd　give　him　to　you　crows？〃
　〃I　only　thought　。　。　。〃　You　have　no　sons；　you　expose　them；　Gilly　said　as　much；　you　leave　them　in　the　woods；　that's　why　you　have　only　wives　here；　and　daughters　who　grow　up　to　be　wives。
　〃Be　quiet；　Sam；〃　said　Lord　mander　Mormont。　〃You've　said　enough。　Too　much。　Inside。〃
　〃M…my　lord　…
　〃Inside！〃
　Red…faced；　Sam　pushed　through　the　deerhides；　back　into　the　gloom　of　the　hall。　Mormont　followed。　〃How　great　a　fool　are　you？〃　the　old　man　said　within；　his　voice　choked　and　angry。　〃Even　if　Craster　gave　us　the　child；　he'd　be　dead　before　we　reached　the　Wall。　We　need　a　newborn　babe　to　care　for　near　as　much　as　we　need　more　snow。　Do　you　have　milk　to　feed　him　in　those　big　teats　of　yours？　Or　did　you　mean　to　take　the　mother　too？〃
　〃She　wan