tg.stone of tears-第163章

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her；　and　not　to　the　crowd。
　
　'You　would　think　to　use　your　power　on　me；　Mother　Confessor？'
　
　That　had　been　exactly　what　she　had　been　thinking；　to　use　her　power　knowing　she　would　die　in　the　process。　But　she　said　nothing。
　
　Ranson's　smile　was　cold　and　cruel。　'You　shall　not　have　the　chance。　I　am　going　to　strip　you　of　three　things。　First；　your　power　and　its　symbol。　Second；　your　dignity。　Third；　your　life。'
　
　Kahlan　threw　herself　at　him。　He　stood；　his　hands　clasped；　and　watched　as　she　was　able　to　move　only　inches　before　she　was　mired　in　a　thickness　of　air　that　held　her　tight。　She　fought　unsuccessfully　against　the　staggering　power　that　held　her。
　
　The　wizard　lifted　his　hands。　Kahlan　saw　a　flash。　She　cried　out　as　she　felt　a　cold　shock　flood　through　her　body。　It　felt　as　if　she　had　plunged　naked　into　an　icy　river。　She　shivered　violently。　The　sting　of　cold　brought　tears　to　her　eyes。　The　cold　pain　felt　as　if　it　could　grow　no　worse；　could　hurt　no　more；　but　then　it　did。
　
　It　felt　as　if　her　insides　ripped；　as　if　her　heart　were　being　torn　from　her　chest。　She　screamed　in　pain。　Stunned　by　the　shock　of　it；　she　realized　she　was　on　her　knees。　Ranson　was　holding　his　hands　out；　over　her　head。
　
　When　the　pain　lifted；　she　felt　tingling　panic。
　
　Her　power　was　gone。
　
　Where　she　had　always　felt　it　before；　without　even　being　aware　of　it　most　of　the　time；　she　now　felt　a　forlorn　emptiness。
　
　She　had　so　often　wished　to　be　rid　of　it；　but　never　realized　what　it　would　feel　like　to　be　without　her　magic。　She　cried　out　again。　Tears　streamed　down　her　cheeks　at　the　forsaken；　vacant　desolation。　She　felt　naked　before　the　mob　of　people。
　
　She　forced　herself　to　stop　the　tears。　She　would　not　let　these　people　see　the　Mother　Confessor　cry。　No　…　she　would　not　let　these　people　see　Kahlan　Amnell　cry。
　
　Ranson　drew　Prince　Fyren's　sword　from　its　scabbard。　He　stepped　behind　her。　He　took　up　her　hair　in　his　fist　and　pulled　it　out　tight　as　she　knelt　on　the　cold　floor。
　
　With　the　sword；　he　sliced　her　hair　off；　close；　right　at　the　nape　of　her　neck。　The　shearing　felt　almost　as　shocking　to　her　as　having　her　power　taken。　The　hair　Richard　loved　so。　She　bit　back　tears。
　
　Neville　Ranson　held　up　the　severed　handful　of　her　hair　to　wild　cheering。　Kahlan　knelt；　numbly　staring　at　nothing；　as　soldiers　tied　her　wrists　behind　her　back。　Ranson　grasped　her　arm；　under　her　shoulder；　and　hauled　her　to　her　feet。
　
　'The　first　of　it；　then；　Mother　Confessor。　You　have　been　stripped　of　your　power；　and　its　symbol。　As　I　promised　you。　Now　to　the　rest　of　it。'
　
　Kahlan　was　silent　…　there　was　nothing　to　say　…　as　Ranson　and　a　cluster　of　grinning　guards　led　her　down　through　the　palace。　She　didn't　pay　any　attention　to　where　she　was　being　taken。　She　was　thinking　about　Richard；　hoping　he　would　remember　her　love　for　him。　She　lost　herself　in　memories　of　him。　She　let　the　world　around　her　go。　She　would　soon　let　the　world　of　life　go；　too。　The　good　spirits　had　deserted　her。
　
　She　was　numb　to　what　was　happening。　The　emptiness　of　being　without　her　power　left　her　feeling　half　dead　already。　She　had　never　known　how　much　it　meant　to　her；　how　much　a　part　of　her　the　magic　was；　until　it　was　gone。　She　wondered　if　this　dull　bleakness　was　the　way　people　without　the　power　felt　all　the　time。　She　couldn't　imagine　living　without　the　magic。
　
　She　longed　for　death；　now；　to　end　this　dead　feeling。　Only　Richard　had　accepted　her　with　her　power。　She　never　pletely　accepted　it　herself；　but　Richard　had。　Now　it　was　too　late。　She　grieved　more　for　the　loss　of　her　magic　than　her　life。　She　knew；　now；　what　the　other　creatures　of　magic　would　feel；　when　it　happened　to　them。　She　grieved　for　them。
　
　Ranson's　hand　on　her　arm　jerked　her　to　a　halt；　jerked　her　to　awareness；　before　an　iron　door　in　a　dim　corridor。　One　of　the　guards　worked　at　a　rusty　lock　on　the　iron　door。　Kahlan　recognized　the　door。　She　had　taken　confessions　down　here。
　
　'And　now；　to　my　second　promise；　Mother　Confessor；'　Ranson　said　with　a　sneer。　'You　will　be　stripped　of　your　dignity。'
　
　Kahlan　gasped　as　his　fist　grabbed　what　was　left　of　her　hair　and　jerked　her　head　back。　As　she　was　held　helpless；　her　wrists　bound　painfully　behind　her　back；　and　her　hair　in　his　fist；　Ranson　kissed　her　neck。
　
　Right　where　Darken　Rahl　had　kissed　her　neck。
　
　The　same　horrors　coursed　through　her　mind　as　when　Darken　Rahl　had　done　it。　She　shuddered　with　revulsion；　with　the　horror　of　the　visions。　In　her　mind；　she　saw　the　young　women　in　Ebinissia；　only　this　time；　she　was　one　of　them。
　
　'I　would　rape　you　myself；'　Ranson　whispered　in　her　ear；　'but　I　find　your　sense　of　honor　disgusting。'
　
　The　door　squeaked　open；　and　without　any　further　word；　Ranson　shoved　her　through　the　doorway；　into　the　pit。
　
　
　CHAPTER　59
　
　Kahlan　gasped　at　the　feeling　of　falling　through　space；　but　before　she　had　a　chance　to　fully　consider　what　would　happen　when　she　hit　the　floor；　rough　hands　caught　her。　They　pushed　her　down　to　the　cold　stone。　She　saw　the　light　of　the　doorway　above　disappear　when　the　door　clanged　closed。　In　the　light　of　a　sputtering　torch　in　a　bracket；　she　saw　grinning　men　all　about；　pushing　in　at　her。
　
　The　rope　cut　into　her　wrists。　Her　feelings　of　terror　and　helplessness　gave　way　to　desperate　action。　Kahlan　kicked　a　man　in　the　groin。　She　was　on　her　back　on　the　floor；　so　she　had　leverage　to　do　damage。　She　rammed　her　heel　into　the　face　of　another　man　leaning　over　her。　He　fell　back　with　a　cry。　She　kicked　frantically　at　the　others。
　
　The　grasping　hands　caught　her　ankles。　She　kicked　her　legs　but　the　men　held　tight。　She　rolled　to　the　side；　breaking　the　grip；　and　skittered　into　a　corner。　Her　freedom　was　only　momentary。　They　seized　her　flailing　legs　again。
　
　In　the　back　of　her　mind；　as　she　fought；　Kahlan　desperately　tried　to　think。　A　spark　of　thought　tried　to　get　her　attention。　It　was　something　about　Zedd；　but　she　couldn't　think　clearly。
　
　The　men　fighting　to　get　at　her　pushed　her　white　dress　up　her　legs。　Hands　pawed　at　her　thighs。　Big；　meaty　fingers　hooked　her　smallclothes；　stripping　them　down　her　legs　and　off　her　feet。　She　felt　rough　hands　and　cold　air　on　her　flesh。　She　fought　the　men　and；　at　the　same　time；　her　own　panic。
　
　Two　men　were　on　the　floor；　one　holding　his　crotch；　the　other　sprawled　out；　blood　gushing　from　his　ruined　face。　His　nose　was　crushed。　There　were　ten　others；　all　trying　to　get　at　her　at　once。　They　threw　each　other　back；　trying　to　force　themselves　on　top　of　her；　the　biggest　working　his　way　in。　Kahlan　couldn't　get　her　breath。
　
　With　frantic　effort；　the　spark　of　thought　sprang　forth。　She　remembered　asking　Zedd　if　he　could　remove　her　power。　She　had　wanted　to　be　free　of　it　so　she　could　be　with　Richard。　Zedd　had　told　her　that　it　wasn't　possible　to　rid　a　Confessor　of　her　power；　that　she　was　born　with　the　magic；　and　it　couldn't　be　separated　from　her　as　long　as　she　was　alive。
　
　How　could　Ranson　have　stripped　her　of　her　power？　Zedd　was　a　wizard　of　the　First　Order；　there　was　no　wizard　with　more　power　than　a　wizard　of　the　First　Order。　Why　wouldn't　Ranson　have　wanted　to　rape　her　first？　He　said　she　disgusted　him。　But　he　said　he　wanted　to　strip　her　of　her　dignity。　Why　wouldn't　he　want　to　do　it？
　
　Unless　he　was　afraid。
　
　Afraid　she　would　figure　it　out。　Figure　what　out？
　
　It　came　to　her。　The　Wizard's　First　Rule。
　
　People　would　believe　anything；　if　they　wanted　to　believe。　Or　if　they　were　afraid　it　was　true。　She　was　afraid　it　was　true　that　he　had　stripped　her　of　her　power。　Maybe　he　had　used　magic　to　give　her　pain　and　mask　her　ability　to　sense　her　own　magic；　to　try　to　trick　her　into　believing　what　she　feared。
　
　As　the　men　groped　at　her；　she　groped　for　her　power。　She　tried　to　find　the　calmness；　the　place　of　her　magic；　but　it　just　wasn't　there。　All　she　felt　was　emptiness。　Where　she　always　felt　the　swell　of　magic　before；　she　now　felt　only　a　numb；　hollow　void。
　
　She　wanted　to　cry　at　the　feel　of　the　men's　hands　on　her　legs；　and　between　them；　but　she　couldn't　allow　herself　to　lose　control；　her　only　chance。　Try　as　she　might；　she　couldn't　find　the　magic；　couldn't　call　it　forth。　It　was　simply　gone。　She　desperately　wanted　her　hands　free。
　
　'Wait！'　she　screamed。
　
　The　men　all　stopped　for　a　moment；　their　faces　pulling　back；　looking　at　her。　She　gasped　to　catch　her　breath。
　
　Talk；　she　ordered　of　herself；　while　you　have　the　chance。　'You're　doing　it　all　wrong！'
　
　They　laughed。　'We　think　we'll　figure　it　out；'　one　said。
　
　Kahlan　struggled　to　control　her　fear；　and　think。　They　were　going　to　do　what　they　were　going　to　do；　and　she　couldn't　stop　them。　Fighting　them　in　this　way　was　going　to　acplish　nothing；　except　to　feed　her　panic。　She　had　only　one　chance；　and　that　was　to　use　her　head。　She　had　to　slow　them　down　and　give　herself　time　to　think。
　
　'If　you　do　it　this　way；　you　will　just　be　denying　yourselves　the　full　satisfaction　of　it。'
　
　They　frowned。　'What　do　you　mean？'
　
　'If　you're　all　fighting　each　other；　and　me；　you　won't　be　able　to　really　enjoy　me　as　a　woman。　Wouldn't　it　be　more　enjoyable　if　I　cooperated？'
　
　They　all　looked　at　one　another。　One　to　the　side　spoke　up。　'She　has　a　point。　The　queen　wasn't　nearly　so　much　good　after　she　went　numb　on　us。'
　
　'Queen？'　Kahlan　asked。　'What　queen？　You　men　are　just　bragging　on　me。　You've　had　no　queen。'
　
　'Queen　Cyrilla；'　a　different　man　said。　'She　fainted　on　us；　then　went　feebleminded。　Just　lay　there　the　whole　time；　like　a　dead　fish。　But　we　had　her　anyway；　had　a　queen。　Still　。。。'
　
　Kahlan　fought　back　the　scream；　fought　to　keep　the　meaning　of　what　she　had　just　learned　from　making　her　start　kicking　again。　That　would　only　get　her　the　same　as　Cyrilla。
　
　Her　only　chance　was　to　use　her　head。　She　needed　time　to　search　for　her　magic；　and　if　she　somehow　did　find　it；　she　needed　the　men　separated。　Otherwise；　nine　men　would　overpower　that　one。　She　had　to　have　things　organized　first；　in　case　the　magic　worked。　And；　she　needed　the　strongest　to　be　the　one。
　
　For　an　instant；　she　abandoned　her　idea；　fearing　it　wouldn't　save　her；　and　worse；　fearing　she　wouldn't　have　the　nerve　to　do　it。　But　then　she　bleakly　realized　that　even　if　it　didn't　work；　it　didn't　matter。　They　were　going　to　rape　her　one　way　or　the　other。　Her　only　chance　was　to　try。　She　had　nothing　to　lose。
　
　'That's　what　I　mean。　Wouldn't　you　rather　have　my　cooperation？　I'm　going　to　be　down　here　for　days。　You'll　each　have　more　than　your　share　of　time　on　me。　Wouldn't　you　rather　I　helped？　That　way；　you　could　all　have　what　you　want。'　She　thought　she　might　vomit。
　
　'Keep　talking；'　the　biggest　man　said　in　a　gruff　voice。
　
　Kahlan　stiffened　her　resolve。　'I've　never　。。。　had　a　man　before。'　They　all　hooted　at　their　luck。　She　waited　until　their　leers　came　back　to　her。　She　fought　back　the　urge　to　shriek　at　the　looks　in　those　eyes。　'Like　I　said；　I've　never　had　a　man。　I　know　you　men　are　going　to　have　me；　and　I　can't　stop　you。　If　it's　going　to　be　done　anyway；　I'd　rather　。。。　enjoy　it。'
　
　Their　hungry　smiles　widened。　'Yea？　Well；　what　do　you　think　you'd　enjoy　most；　little　lady？'
　
　'If　you　did　it　one　at　a　time。　Wouldn't　that　be　better　for　you；　too？　If　you　weren't　fighting　each　other；　if　you　waited　your　turn；　then　you　could　concentrate　on　enjoy