tg.stone of tears-第37章

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to　be　that。
　
　A　maidservant　on　her　hands　and　knees；　concentrating　on　wiping　at　a　spot　on　a　carpet；　looked　up　just　in　time　to　leap　back　out　of　the　way　with　a　'Forgive　me；　Sister。'　On　her　hands　and　knees；　she　touched　her　head　to　the　floor　with　another　apology。
　
　Grown。　It　would　have　been　difficult　enough　to　turn　this　one　if　he　were　still　a　boy。　But　a　man？　She　shook　her　head　again。　Grown。　She　smacked　the　rod　against　her　thigh　in　frustration。　Two　maidservants　nearby　jumped　at　the　sound　and　fell　to　their　knees；　burying　their　tightly　closed　eyes　behind　prayerful　hands。
　
　Well；　grown　or　not；　he　would　have　a　Rada'Han　around　his　neck；　and　a　whole　palace　full　of　Sisters　to　watch　over　him。　But　even　wearing　a　Rada'Han；　he　was　still　grown　into　a　man。　And　the　Seeker。　He　might　be　difficult　to　control。　Dangerously　difficult。
　
　If　necessary；　she　guessed；　he　could　always　have　a　'training　accident。'　If　not　that；　there　were　certainly　enough　other　dangers　to　one　with　the　gift；　dangers　that　could　leave　a　man　worse　than　dead。　But　if　she　could　turn　him；　or　use　him；　that　would　make　all　the　trouble　worthwhile。
　
　She　turned　into　a　hall　she　at　first　thought　empty；　then　noticed　a　young　woman　standing　in　the　shadows　between　lamps；　gazing　out　a　window。　She　thought　she　recognized　her。　One　of　the　novices。　She　stopped　behind　the　young　woman　and　folded　her　arms。　The　novice　tapped　her　toe　on　the　carpet　as　she　leaned　on　her　elbows　through　the　opened　window；　looking　at　the　gates　below。
　
　She　cleared　her　throat。　The　young　woman　spun；　gasped；　and　dropped　into　a　curtsy。
　
　'Forgive　me；　Sister；　I　didn't　hear　you　ing。　A　good　evening　to　you。'
　
　When　the　big　brown　eyes　came　up；　she　put　the　end　of　the　rod　under　the　young　woman's　chin　and　lifted　it　a　little　more。　'Pasha；　isn't　it？'
　
　'Yes；　Sister。　Pasha　Maes。　Novice；　third　rank。　Next　in　line　to　be　named。'
　
　'Next　in　line；'　she　sniffed。　'Presumption；　my　dear；　does　not　befit　a　Sister；　and　less　so　a　novice。　Even　one　of　the　third　rank。'
　
　Pasha　cast　her　eyes　down　and　gave　a　curtsy；　as　best　she　could　with　the　rod　still　under　her　chin。　'Yes；　Sister。　Forgive　me。'
　
　'What　are　you　doing　here？'
　
　'Just　watching；　Sister。　Watching　the　night。'
　
　'Watching　the　night。　I　would　say　you　were　watching　the　gates。　Am　I　wrong；　novice？'
　
　Pasha　tried　to　look　down；　but　the　rod　lifted　her　chin；　keeping　her　eyes　to　her　superior。　'No；　Sister；'　she　admitted；　'you　are　not　wrong。　I　was　watching　the　gates。'　She　licked　her　full　lips　several　times。
　
　At　last　she　spilled　out　the　words。　'I　heard　the　talk；　the　talk　among　the　girls。　They　say；　well；　they　say　three　of　the　Sisters　have　been　gone　a　long　time　now；　and　that　could　only　mean　they　are　bringing　back　one　with　the　gift。　A　new　one。　In　all　the　years　I　have　been　here；　I；have　never　seen　a　new　one　brought　in。'　She　licked　her　lips　again。　'Well；　I　am　。。。　I　mean　。。。　I　hope　to　be　next　in　line。　And　if　I　am　to　be　named；　I　will　have　to　be　assigned　a　new　one。'　She　knitted　her　fingers　together。　'I　so　want　to　be　named　a　Sister。　I　have　studied　hard；　worked　hard。　Waited　and　waited。　And　no　new　one　has　e　yet。　Forgive　me　Sister；　but　I　just　can't　help　being　excited；　and　hopeful；　that　I　will　be　worthy。　So　。。。　yes；　I　was　watching　the　gate；　hoping　I　would　see　him　brought　in。'
　
　'And　you　think　you　are　strong　enough　to　handle　the　job？　To　handle　a　new　one？'
　
　'Yes；　Sister。　I　study　and　practice　my　forms　every　day。'
　
　She　looked　down　her　nose　at　the　novice。　'Is　that　so？　Show　me。'
　
　As　they　stared　at　each　other；　she　felt　her　feet　rise　off　the　ground　a　few　inches。　Solid　grip　of　air；　strong。　Not　bad。　She　wondered　if　the　novice　could　handle　interference。　With　that　thought；　fire　ignited　at　both　ends　of　the　hall；　sweeping　with　a　howl　toward　the　two　women。　Pasha　didn't　flinch。　The　fire　hit　a　wall　of　air　before　reaching　them。　Air　was　not　the　best　for　fire。　A　small　error　Pasha　quickly　corrected。　Before　the　fire　burned　through；　the　air　became　moist；　dripping。　The　fire　hissed　out。
　
　Although　she　didn't　try　to　move；　she　knew　she　couldn't。　She　could　feel　that　the　grip　held　her　firmly。　She　turned　it　cold；　brittle；　with　ice；　and　broke　it。　When　she　was　free；　she　lifted　Pasha　from　the　floor。　Defensive　webs　from　the　girl　wove　through　her　snaking　onslaught；　but　failed　to　break　the　grip。　Her　feet　rose　again。　Impressive　…　the　girl　could　counter　even　while　being　held。
　
　Spells　tangled　together；　conflicting；　fighting；　snarling　into　knots。　Each　matched　and　defended；　striking　back　at　any　opportunity。　The　silent；　motionless　battle　raged　on　for　a　time；　the　two　of　them　hanging　inches　off　the　ground。
　
　At　last；　she　tired　of　the　sport　and　severed　herself　from　the　webs；　tying　them　to　the　girl；　locking　them　on。　She　settled　gently　to　the　ground；　and　left　Pasha　with　the　whole　weight　of　the　load　to　juggle。　A　simple；　if　devious；　escape：　giving　the　opponent　not　only　the　attacking　spells　to　deal　with；　but　dumping　her　own　back　on　her。　Pasha　hadn't　been　expecting　this；　and　wasn't　able　to　defend　against　it；　it　was　not　the　way　she　had　been　taught。
　
　Sweat　ran　down　the　novice's　face　as　she　grimaced　slightly。　The　force　radiating　through　the　hall　made　carpets　curl　up　at　their　corners。　Lamps　chattered　in　their　brackets。　Pasha　was　getting　angry。　Her　brow　wrinkled。　With　a　loud　crack　that　shattered　a　mirror　far　off　down　the　hall；　she　broke　the　spells。　Her　slippered　feet　settled　to　the　ground。
　
　Pasha　took　a　few　deep　breaths。　'I　have　not　seen　that　done　before；　Sister。　It　is　not　。。。　by　the　rules。'
　
　She　put　the　rod　back　under　the　other's　chin。　'Rules　are　for　children's　games。　You　are　no　longer　a　child。　When　you　are　a　full　Sister；　you　must　deal　with　situations　where　there　are　no　rules。　You　must　be　prepared　for　that。　If　you　always　stick　to　somebody's　'rules；'　you　may　find　yourself　at　the　point　of　a　very　sharp　knife；　held　by　a　hand　that　doesn't　know　about　your　'rules。''
　
　Pasha　didn't　flinch。　'Yes；　Sister。　Thank　you　for　showing　me。'
　
　She　smiled　inwardly；　but　kept　it　off　her　face。　This　one　had　a　spine；　if　a　small　one。　A　rare　modity　in　a　novice；　even　one　of　the　third　rank。
　
　She　let　her　eyes　take　in　Pasha　again：　soft　brown　hair　that　just　touched　her　shoulders；　big　brown　eyes；　attractive　features；　lips　of　the　sort　men　stared　at；　proud；　upright　shoulders；　and　a　sweep　of　curves　that　even　a　novice's　dress　failed　to　conceal。
　
　She　let　the　rod　trail　from　Pasha's　chin；　down　her　neck；　down　into　the　heart　of　her　exposed　cleavage。
　
　Grown　into　a　man。
　
　'And　since　when；　Pasha；'　she　said　in　a　quiet　voice　that　could　have　been　taken　for　either　threatening；　or　kind；　'have　novices　been　allowed　to　wear　their　dresses　unbuttoned　like　this？'
　
　Pasha　blushed　furiously。　'Forgive　me；　Sister。　It's　such　a　warm　night。　I　was　alone　。。。　I　didn't　think　there　was　anyone　about。　I　just　wanted　to　let　the　breeze　cool　my　skin。'　Her　face　turned　a　deeper　red。　'I　sweat　so；　there。　I　never　meant　to　offend　anyone。　I'm　so　embarrassed。　Forgive　me。'
　
　Pasha's　hands　rushed　to　the　buttons。　With　the　rod；　she　gently　pushed　the　hands　away　from　the　swell　of　the　young　woman's　bosom。
　
　'The　Creator　made　you　this　way。　You　should　not　be　embarrassed　of　what　He　has　chosen；'　in　his　wisdom；　to　bestow　upon　you。　You　should　never　be　ashamed；　Pasha；　of　what　He　has　graced　you　with。　Only　those　of　questionable　loyalty　to　the　Creator　would　scorn　you　for　being　proud　of　showing　the　Maker's　hand　in　all　its　magnificence。'
　
　'Why　。。。　thank　you；　Sister。　I　never　looked　at　it　in　quite　that　way。'　A　frown　wrinkled　her　brow。　'What　do　you　mean；　'questionable　loyalty'？'
　
　She　pulled　the　rod　away　and　lifted　an　eyebrow。　'Those　who　worship　the　Nameless　One　don't　hide　in　the　shadows；　my　dear。　They　could　be　anywhere。　Why；　even　you　could　be　one。　Even　me。'
　
　Pasha　fell　to　a　knee；　bowing　her　head。　'Oh；　please；　Sister；'　she　implored；　'don't　say　such　a　thing　of　yourself；　even　in　jest。　You　are　a　Sister　of　the　Light；　and　we　are　in　the　Palace　of　the　Prophets；　safe；　I　pray；　from　the　whispers　of　the　Nameless　One。'
　
　'Safe？'　With　her　rod；　she　motioned　the　novice　up。　After　she　was　on　her　feet；　she　gave　her　a　stern　look。　'Only　a　fool　assumes　she　is　safe；　even　here。　Sisters　of　the　Light　are　not　fools。　Even　they　must　always　be　alert　to　the　dark　whispers。'
　
　'Yes；　Sister。　I　will　remember。'
　
　'Remember　it；　any　time　someone　would　make　you　ashamed　of　how　the　Creator　has　formed　you。　Ask　yourself　why　they　blush　at　seeing　the　Maker's　hand。　Blush；　as　the　Nameless　One　would。'
　
　'Yes；　Sister。　。。。　Thank　you；'　she　stammered。　'You　have　given　me　things　to　think　on。　I　have　never　thought　about　the　Creator　in　this　way　before。'
　
　'He　has　reasons　for　the　things　He　does。　Is　this　not　true？'
　
　'What　do　you　mean？'
　
　'Well；　when　He　gives　a　man　a　strong　back；　what　does　that　say？'
　
　'Everyone　knows　that。　He　was　given　the　strong　back　to　use。　It　means　the　Creator　has　given　him　the　strong　back　so　that　he　might　work　to　feed　his　family。　Work　to　make　his　way。　Work　to　make　the　Creator　proud。　And　not　waste　the　Creator's　gift　by　being　lazy。'
　
　She　whisked　the　rod　up　and　down　in　front　of　Pasha。　'And　what　do　you　think　the　Creator　had　in　mind　when　he　gave　you　this　body？'
　
　'I　。。。　don't　know　。。。　exactly。　That　I　should　use　it　to　。。。　make　the　Creator　proud　of　His　work　。。。　in　some　way？'
　
　She　nodded。　'You　think　on　it。　You　think　on　your　reason　for　being　here。　Being　here　at　this　time。　We　are　all　here　for　a　reason。　The　Sisters　of　the　Light　are　here　for　a　reason；　are　they　not？'
　
　'Oh；　yes；　Sister。　We　are　here　to　teach　the　ones　with　the　gift；　teach　them　to　use　it；　and　guide　them　so　they　may　not　hear　the　whispers　of　the　Nameless　One；　that　they　may　hear　only　the　Creator。'
　
　'And　how　are　we　able　to　do　that？'
　
　'We　were　given　the　gift　of　being　sorceresses；　so　that　we　may　be　able　to　guide　them　in　their　gift。'
　
　'And　if　the　Creator　was　wise　enough　to　give　you　that　gift；　the　gift　of　being　a　sorceress；　do　you　not　think　He　may　have　given　you　your　looks　for　a　reason　too？　Maybe　to　be　a　part　of　your　calling　as　a　Sister　of　the　Light？　To　use　your　looks　to　serve　Him？'
　
　Pasha　stared。　'Why；　I　never　thought　of　it　that　way　before。　In　what　way　are　my　looks　to　be　of　aid？'
　
　She　shrugged。　'We　cannot　always　know　what　the　Creator　has　intended。　When　He　wishes；　it　will　be　revealed。'
　
　'Yes；　Sister。'　Her　voice　was　unsure。
　
　'Pasha；　when　you　see　a　man　that　the　Creator　has　graced　with　good　looks；　a　finely　shaped　body；　what　do　you　think？　What　do　you　feel？'
　
　Pasha　blushed。　'I　。。。　sometimes　。。。　it　makes　my　heart　race。　I　guess。　It　makes　me　feel。。。　good。　Feel　longings。'
　
　At　last　she　allowed　a　small　smile。　'There　is　no　need　to　blush；　my　dear。　It　is　a　longing　to　touch　what　the　Creator's　hand　has　wrought。　Don't　you　suppose　it　pleases　the　Creator　that　you　appreciate　His　work？　Don't　you　think　He　wants　you　to　like　what　He　has　done？　To　enjoy　it？　Just　as　you　must　know　that　men　enjoy　witnessing　your　beauty　and　long　to　touch　the　work　of　the　Creator's　hand。　It　would　be　a　crime　against　the　Creator　not　to　use；　in　your　service　to　Him；　what　He　has　given　you。'
　
　Pasha　smiled　shyly。　'I　never　thought　about　it　in　that　way。　You　have　given　me　new　eyes；　Sister。　The　more　I　learn；　the　more　it　seems　I　don't　know