cb.imajica2-第27章

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　he　didn't　much　mind。　Admiration　charged　the　blood。　And　when　the　Reconciliation　had　been　achieved；　the　more　tongues　there　were　to　say　they'd　seen　it　done；　and　sanctify　the　doer；　the　better。
　〃I　beg　you；　sir；〃　Lucius　was　saying。　〃I'll　be　in　your　debt　forever。〃
　Gentle　nodded；　ruffling　the　youth's　ginger　hair。　〃You　may　watch；〃　he　said。
　Tears　started　to　the　boy's　eyes；　and　he　snatched　up　Gentie's　hand；　laying　his　lips　to　it。　〃I　am　the　luckiest　man　in　England；〃　he　said。　〃Thank　you；　sir；　thank　you。〃
　Quieting　the　boy's　profusions；　Gentle　left　him　at　the　door　and　stepped　through　into　the　dining　room。　As　he　did　so　he　wondered　if　all　these　events　and　conversations　had　actually　dovetailed　in　this　fashion；　or　whether　his　memory　was　collecting　fragments　from　different　nights　and　days；　knitting　them　together　so　that　they　appeared　seamless。　If　the　latter　was　the　case…and　he　guessed　it　was…then　there　were　probably　clues　in　these　scenes　to　mysteries　yet　to　be　unveiled；　and　he　should　try　to　remember　their　every　detail。　But　it　was　difficult。　He　was　both　Gentle　and　Sartori　here；　both　witness　and　actor。　It　was　hard　to　live　the　moments　when　he　was　also　observing　them；　and　harder　still　to　dig　for　the　seam　of　their　significance　when　their　surface　gleamed　so　fetchingly；　and　when　he　was　the　brightest　jewel　that　shone　there。　How　they　had　idolized　him！　He'd　been　like　a　divinity　among　them；　his　every　belch　and　fart　attended　to　like　a　sermon；　his　cosmological　pronouncements…of　which　he　was　too　fond…greeted　with　reverence　and　gratitude；　even　by　the　mightiest。
　Three　of　those　mighty　awaited　him　in　the　dining　room；　gathered　at　one　end　of　a　table；　set　for　four　but　laden　with　sufficient　food　to　sate　the　street　for　a　week。　Joshua　was　one　of　the　trio；　of　course。　Roxborough　and　his　long…time　foil　Oliver　McGann　were　the　others；　the　latter　well　in　his　cups；　the　former；　as　ever；　keeping　his　counsel；　his　ascetic　features；　dominated　by　the　long　hook　of　his　nose；　always　half　masked　by　his　hands。　He　despised　his　mouth；　Gentle　thought；　because　it　betrayed　his　nature；　which　despite　his　incalculable　wealth　and　his　pretensions　to　metaphysics　was　peevish；　penurious；　and　sullen。
　〃Religion's　for　the　faithful；〃　McGann　was　loudly　opining。　〃They　say　their　prayers；　their　prayers　aren't　answered；　and　their　faith　increases。　Whereas　magic…〃　He　stopped；　laying　his　inebriated　gaze　on　the　Maestro　at　the　door。　〃Ah！　The　very　man！　The　very　man！　Tell　him；　Sartori！　Tell　him　what　magic　is。〃
　Roxborough　had　made　a　pyramid　of　his　fingers；　the　apex　at　the　bridge　of　his　nose。　〃Yes；　Maestro；〃　he　said。　〃Do　tell。〃
　〃My　pleasure；〃　Gentle　replied；　taking　the　glass　of　wine　McGann　poured　for　him　and　wetting　his　throat　before　he　provided　tonight's　profundities。　〃Magic　is　the　first　and　last　religion　of　the　world；〃　he　said。　〃It　has　the　power　to　make　us　whole。　To　open　our　eyes　to　the　Dominions　and　return　us　to　ourselves。〃
　〃That　sounds　very　fine；〃　Roxborough　said　flatly。　〃But　what　does　it　mean？〃
　〃It's　obvious　what　it　means；〃　McGann　protested。
　〃Not　to　me　it　isn't。〃
　〃It　means　we're　born　divided；　Roxborough；〃　the　Maestro　replied。　〃But　we　long　for　union。〃
　〃Oh；　we　do；　do　we？〃
　〃I　believe　so。〃
　〃And　why　should　we　seek　union　with　ourselves？〃　Roxborough　said。　〃Tell　me　that。　I　would　have　thought　we're　the　only　pany　we're　certain　we　have。〃
　There　was　a　riling　smugness　to　the　man's　tone；　but　the　Maestro　had　heard　these　niceties　before　and　had　his　answers　well　honed。
　〃Everything　that　isn't　us　is　also　ourselves；〃　he　said。　He　came　to　the　table　and　set　down　his　glass；　peering　through　the　smoky　candle　flames　at　Roxborough's　black　eyes。　〃We're　joined　to　everything　that　was；　is；　and　will　be；〃　he　said。　〃From　one　end　of　the　Imajica　to　another。　From　the　tiniest　mote　dancing　over　this　flame　to　the　Godhead　Itself。〃
　He'took　breath；　leaving　room　for　a　retort　from　Roxborough。　But　none　came。
　〃We'll　not　be　subsumed　at　our　deaths；〃　he　went　on。　〃We'll　be　increased：　to　the　size　of　Creation。〃
　〃Yes。。。〃　McGann　said；　the　word　ing　long　and　loud　from　between　teeth　clenched　in　a　tigerish　smile。
　〃Magic's　our　means　to　that　Revelation；〃　the　Maestro　said；　〃while　we're　still　in　our　flesh。〃
　〃And　is　it　your　opinion　tnat　we　are　given　that　Revelation？〃　Roxborough　replied。　〃Or　are　we　stealing　it？〃
　〃We　were　born　to　know　as　much　as　we　can　know。〃
　〃We　were　born　to　suffer　in　our　flesh；〃　Roxborough　said。
　〃You　may　suffer；　I　don't。〃
　The　reply　won　a　guffaw　from　McGann。
　〃The　flesh　isn't　punishment；〃　the　Maestro　said；　〃it's　there　for　joy。　But　it　also　marks　the　place　where　we　end　and　the　rest　of　Creation　begins。　Or　so　we　believe。　It's　an　illusion；　of　course。〃
　〃Good；〃　said　Godolphin。　〃I　like　that。〃
　〃So　are　we　about　God's　business　or　not？〃　Roxborough　wanted　to　know。
　〃Are　you　having　second　thoughts？〃
　〃Third　and　fourth；　more　like；〃　McGann　said。
　Roxborough　gave　the　man　at　his　side　a　sour　glance。　〃Did　we　swear　an　oath　not　to　doubt？〃　he　said。　〃I　don't　think　so。　Why　should　I　be　castigated　because　I　ask　a　simple　question？〃
　〃I　apologize；〃　McGann　said。　〃Tell　the　man；　Maestro。　We're　doing　God's　work；　aren't　we？〃
　〃Does　God　want　us　to　be　more　than　we　are？〃　Gentle　said。　〃Of　course。　Does　God　want　us　to　love；　which　is　the　desire　to　be　joined　and　made　whole？　Of　course。　Does　It　want　us　in　Its　glory；　forever　and　ever？　Yes；　It　does。〃
　〃You　always　say　It；〃　McGann　observed。　〃Why's　that？〃
　〃Creation　and　its　maker　are　one　and　the　same。　True　or　false？〃
　〃True。〃
　〃And　Creation's　as　full　of　women　as　it　is　of　men。　True　or　false？〃
　〃Oh；　true；　true。〃
　〃Indeed；　I　give　thanks　for　the　fact　night　and　day；〃　Gentle　said；　glancing　at　Godolphin　as　he　spoke。　〃Beside　my　bed　and　in　it。〃
　Joshua　laughed　his　Devil's　laugh。
　〃So　the　Godhead　is　both　male　and　female。　For　convenience；　an　It。〃
　〃Bravely　said！〃　Joshua　announced。　〃I　never　tire　of　hearing　you　speak；　Sartori。　My　thoughts　get　muddy；　but　after　I've　listened　to　you　awhile　they're　like　spring　water；　straight　from　the　rock！〃
　〃Not　too　clean；　I　hope；〃　the　Maestro　said。　〃We　don't　want　any　Puritan　souls　spoiling　the　Reconciliation。〃
　〃You　know　me　better　than　that；〃　Joshua　said；　catching　Gentle's　eye。
　Even　as　he　did　so；　Gentle　had　proof　of　his　suspicion　that　these　encounters；　though　remembered　in　one　continuous　stream；　had　not　occurred　sequentially　but　were　fragments　his　mind　was　knitting　together　as　the　rooms　he　was　walking　through　evoked　them。　McGann　and　Roxborough　faded　from　the　table；　as　did　most　of　the　candlelight　and　the　litter　of　carafes；　glasses；　and　food　it　had　illuminated。　Now　there　was　only　Joshua　and　himself；　and　the　house　was　stilt　above　and　below。　Everyone　asleep；　but　for　these　conspirators。
　〃I　want　to　be　with　you　when　you　perform　the　working；〃　Josbua　was　saying。　There　was　no　hint　of　laughter　now。　He　looked　harassed　and　nervous。　〃She's　very　precious　to　me；　Sartori。　If　anything　were　to　happen　to　her　I'd　lose　my　mind。〃
　〃She'll　be　perfectly　safe；〃　the　Maestro　said；　sitting　down　at　the　table。
　There　was　a　map　of　the　Imajica　laid　out　in　front　of　him；　with　the　names　of　the　Maestros　and　their　assistants　in　eacS　Dominion　marked　beside　their　places　of　conjuration。　He　scanned　them　and　found　he　knew　one　or　two。　Tick　Raw　was　there；　as　the　deputy　to　Uter　Musky；　Scopique　was　there　too；　marked　as　an　assistant　to　an　assistant　to　Heratae　Hammeryock；　the　latter　a　distant　relation；　perhaps；　of　the　Hammeryock　whom　Gentle　and　Pie　had　encountered　in　Vanaeph。　Names　from　two　pasts；　intersecting　here　on　the　map。
　〃Are　you　listening　to　me？〃　Joshua　said。
　〃I　told　you　she'd　be　perfectly　safe；〃　came　the　Maestro's　reply。　〃The　workings　are　delicate；　but　they're　not　dangerous。〃
　〃Then　let　me　be　there；〃　Godolphin　said；　wringing　his　hands。　〃I'll　be　your　assistant　instead　of　that　wretched　mystif。〃
　〃I　haven't　even　told　Pie　'oh'　pah　what　we're　up　to。　This　is　our　business　and　only　ours。　You　just　bring　Judith　here　tomorrow　evening；　and　I'll　see　to　the　rest。〃
　〃She's　so　vulnerable。〃
　〃She　seems　very　self…possessed　to　me；〃　the　Maestro　observed。　〃Very　heated。〃
　Godolphin's　fretful　expression　soured　into　ice。　〃Don't　parade　it；　Sartori；〃　he　said。　〃It's　not　enough　that　I've　got　Roxborough　at　my　ear　all　yesterday；　telling　me　he　doesn't　trust　you；　I　have　to　bear　you　parading　your　arrogance。〃
　〃Roxborough　understands　nothing。〃
　〃He　says　you're　obsessed　with　women；　so　he　understands　that；　at　least。　You　watch　some　girl　across　the　street；　he　says…〃
　〃What　if　I　do？〃
　〃How　can　you　give　yourself　to　the　Reconciliation　if　you're　so　distracted？〃
　〃Are　you　trying　to　talk　me　out　of　wanting　Judith？〃
　〃I　thought　magic　was　a　religion　to　you。〃
　〃So's　she。〃
　〃A　discipline；　a　sacred　mystery。〃
　〃Again；　so's　she。〃　He　laughed。　〃When　I　first　saw　her；　it　was　like　my　first　glimpse　of　another　world。　I　knew　I'd　risk　my　life　to　be　inside　her　skin。　When　I'm　with　her；　I　feel　like　an　adept　again；　creeping　towards　a　miracle；　step　by　step。　Tentative；　excited…〃
　〃Enough！〃
　〃Really？　You　don't　want　to　know　why　I　need　to　be　inside　her　so　badly？〃
　Godolphin　eyed　him　ruefully。　〃Not　really；〃　he　said。　〃But　if　you　don't　tell　me；　I'll　only　wonder。〃
　〃Because　for　a　little　time；　I'll　forget　who　I　am。　Everything　petty　and　particular　will　go　out　of　me。　My　ambition。　My　history。　Everything。　I'll　be　unmade。　And　that's　when　I'm　closest　to　divinity。〃
　〃Somehow　you　always　manage　to　bring　everything　back　to　that。　Even　your　lust。〃
　〃It's　all　One。〃
　〃I　don't　like　your　talk　of　the　One；〃　Godolphin　said。
　〃You　sound　like　Roxborough　with　his　die　turns！　Simplicity　is　strength　and　all　the　rest。〃
　〃That's　not　what　I　mean　and　you　know　it。　It's　just　that　women　are　where　everything　begins；　and　I　like…how　shall　I　put　it？　…　to　touch　the　source　as　often　as　possible。〃
　〃You　think　you're　perfect；　don't　you？〃　Godolphin　said。
　〃Why　so　sour？　A　week　ago　you　were　doting　on　my　every　word。〃
　〃I　don't　like　what　we're　doing；〃　Godolphin　replied。　〃I　want　Judith　for　myself。〃
　〃You'll　have　her。　And　so　will　I。　That's　the　glory　of　this。〃
　〃There'll　be　no　difference　between　them？〃
　〃None。　They'll　be　identical。　To　the　pucker。　To　the　lash。〃
　〃So　why　must　I　have　the　copy？〃
　〃You　know　the　answer　to　that。　Because　the　original　loves　me；　not　you。〃
　〃I　should　never　have　let　you　set　eyes　on　her。〃
　〃You　couldn't　have　kept　us　apart。　Don't　look　so　forlorn。　I'm　going　to　make　you　a　Judith　that'll　dote　on　you　and　your　sons；　and　your　son's　sons；　until　the　name　Godolphin　disappears　off　the　face　of　the　earth。　Now　where's　the　harm　in　that？〃
　As　he　asked　the　question　all　the　candles　but　the　one　he　held　went　out；　and　the　past　was　extinguished　with　them。　He　was　suddenly　back　in　the　empty　house；　a　police　siren　whooping　〃nearby。　He　stepped　back　into　the　hallway　as　the　car　sped　down　Gamut　Street；　its　blue　light　pulsing　through　the　windows。　Seconds　later；　another　came　howling　after。　Though　the　din　of　the　sirens　faded　and　finally　disappeared；　the　flashes　did　not。　They　brightened　from　blue　to　white；　however；　and　lost　their　regularity。　By　their　brilliance　he　saw　the　house　once　more　restored　to　glory。　It　was　no　longer　a　place　of　debate　and　laughter　however。　There　was　sobbing　above　and　below；　and　the　animal　smells　of　fear　in　every　corner。　Thunder　rattled　the　roof；　but　there　was　no　rain　to　soothe　its　choler。
　I　don't　want　to　be　he