cb.imajica2-第34章

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　After　a　time；　he　raised　her　foot　to　his　mouth　and　licked　the　sole　from　heel　to　toe　in　one　motion。　Then　his　breath　again；　cooling　the　fluid　he'd　bathed　her　with；　and　slowing　still　further　as　it　came　and　went；　until　her　system　seemed　to　teeter　on　termination　at　the　end　of　each　breath；　only　to　be　coaxed　back　into　life　again　as　she　inhaled。　This　was　the　substance　of　every　moment；　she　realized：　the　body…never　certain　if　the　next　lungful　would　be　its　last…hovering　for　a　tiny　time　between　cessation　and　continuance。　And　in　that　space　out　of　time；　between　a　breath　expelled　and　another　drawn；　the　miraculous　was　easy；　because　neither　flesh　nor　reason　had　laid　their　edicts　there。　She　felt　his　mouth　open　wide　enough　to　enpass　her　toes　and　then；　impossible　as　it　was；　slide　her　foot　into　his　throat。
　He's　going　to　swallow　me；　she　thought；　and　the　notion　conjured　once　again　the　book　she'd　found　in　Estabrook's　study；　with　its　sequence　of　lovers　enclosed　in　a　circle　of　consumption：　a　devouring　so　prodigious　it　had　ended　with　mutual　eclipse。　She　felt　no　unease　at　the　prospect。　This　wasn't　the　business　of　the　visible　world；　where　fear　got　fat　because　there　was　so　much　to　win　and　lose。　This　was　a　place　for　lovers；　where　there　was　only　ever　gain。
　She　felt　him　draw　her　other　leg　up　to　his　head　and　immerse　it　in　the　same　heat；　then　felt　him　take　hold　of　her　hips　and　use　them　as　purchase　to　impale　himself　upon　her；　inch　by　inch。　Perhaps　he'd　bee　vast：　his　maw　monstrous；　his　throat　a　tunnel；　or　perhaps　she　was　pliant　as　silk；　and　he　was　drawing　her　into　him　like　a　magician　threading　fake　flowers　into　a　wand。　She　reached　up　towards　him　in　the　darkness；　to　feel　the　miracle；　but　her　fingers　couldn't　interpret　what　buzzed　beneath　them。　Was　this　her　flesh　or　his？　Ankle　or　cheek？　There　was　no　way　of　knowing。　Nor；　in　truth；　any　need　to　know。　All　she　wanted　now　was　to　do　as　the　lovers　in　the　book　had　done　and　match　his　devouring　with　her　own。
　She　reached　for　the　edge　of　the　bed　and　turned　herself　half　over；　bringing　him　down　beside　her。　Now；　though　her　eyes　were　besotted　by　darkness；　she　saw　the　outline　of　his　body；　folded　into　the　shadows　of　her　own。　There　was　nothing　changed　about　his　anatomy。　Though　he　was　consuming　her；　his　body　was　in　no　way　distorted。　He　lay　beside　her　like　a　sleeper。　She　reached　out　to　touch　him　a　second　time；　not　expecting　to　make　sense　of　his　body　now　but　finding　she　could。　This　was　his　thigh；　this　his　shin；　this　his　ankle　and　foot。　As　she　ran　her　palm　across　his　flesh　a　delicate　wave　of　change　came　with　it；　and　his　substance　seemed　to　soften　beneath　her　touch。　The　scent　of　his　sweat　was　appetizing。　It；　quickened　the　juices　in　her　throat　and　belly。　She　drew　her　head　towards　his　feet　and　touched　her　lips　to　the　substance　of　him。　Then　she　was　feeding；　spreading　her　hunger　around　him　like　a　mouth　and　closing　her　mind　on　his　glistening　skin。　He　shuddered　as　she　took　him　in；　and　she　felt　the　thrill　of　his　pleasure　as　her　own。　He　had　already　consumed　her　to　the　hips；　but　she　quickly　matched　his　appetite；　taking　his　legs　down　into　her；　swallowing　both　his　prick　and　the　belly　it　lay　hard　against。　She　loved　the　excess　of　this；　and　its　absurdity；　their　bodies　defying　physics　and　physique；　or　else　making　fresh　proofs　of　both　as　the　configuration　closed　upon　itself。　Was　anything　ever　so　easy　and　yet　so　impossible；　besides　love？　And　what　was　this；　if　not　that　paradox　laid　on　a　sheet？　He　had　slowed　his　swallows　to　allow　her　to　catch　up；　and　now；　in　tandem；　they　closed　the　loop　of　their　consumption；　until　their　bodies　were　figments；　and　they　were　mouth　to　mouth。
　Something　from　outside…a　shout　in　the　street；　a　sour　saxophone　chord…threw　her　back　into　the　plausible　world　again；　and　she　saw　the　root　from　which　their　invention　had　flowered。　It　was　a　monplace　conjunction：　her　legs　crossed　around　his　hips；　his　erection　high　inside　her。　She　couldn't　see　his　face；　but　she　knew　he　wasn't　here　in　this　fugitive　place　with　her。　He　was　still　dreaming　their　devouring。　She　panicked；　wanted　to　regain　the　vision　but　not　knowing　how。　She　tightened　her　grip　on　his　body　and；　in　so　doing；　inspired　his　hips　to　motion。　He　began　to　move　in　her；　breathing　oh　so　slowly　against　her　face。　She　forgot　her　panic　and　let　her　rhythm　once　again　slow　until　it　matched　his。　The　solid　world　dissolved　as　she　did　so；　and　she　returned　to　the　place　from　which　she'd　been　called　to　find　that　the　loop　was　tightening　by　the　moment；　his　mind　enveloping　her　head　as　she　enveloped　his；　like　layers　of　an　impossible　onion；　each　one　smaller　than　the　layer　it　concealed：　an　enigma　that　could　only　exist　where　substance　collapsed　into　the　very　mind　which　begged　its　being。
　This　bliss　could　not　be　sustained　indefinitely；　however。　Before　long　it　began　once　more　to　lose　its　purity；　tainted　by　further　sounds　from　the　outside　world；　and　this　time　she　sensed　that　he　was　also　relinquishing　his　hold　on　the　delirium。　Perhaps；　as　they　learned　to　be　lovers　again；　they'd　find　a　way　to　sustain　the　state　for　longer：　spend　nights　and　days；　perhaps；　lost　in　the　precious　space　between　a　breath　expelled　and　another　drawn。　But　for　now　she　would　have　to　be　content　with　the　ecstasy　they'd　had。　Reluctantly；　she　let　the　tropic　night　in　which　they'd　devoured　each　other　be　subsumed　into　a　simpler　darkness；　and；'without　quite　knowing　where　consciousness　began　and　ended；　she　fell　asleep。
　When　she　awoke　she　was　alone　in　the　bed。　That　disappointment　apart；　she　felt　both　lively　and　light。　What　they'd　shared　was　a　modity　more　marketable　than　a　cure　for　the　mon　cold：　a　high　without　a　hangover。　She　sat　up；　reaching　for　a　sheet　to　drape　around　her；　but　before　she　could　stand　she　heard　his　voice　in　the　predawn　gloom。　He　was　standing　by　the　window；　with　a　fold　of　curtain　clipped　between　middle　and　forefinger；　his　eye　to　the　chink　he'd　opened。
　〃It's　time　for　me　to　get　working；〃　he　said　softly。
　〃It's　still　early；〃　she　said。
　〃The　sun's　almost　up；〃　he　replied。　〃I　can't　waste　time。〃
　He　let　the　curtain　drop　and　crossed　to　the　bed。　She　sat　up　and　put　her　arms　around　his　torso。　She　wanted　to　spend　time　with　him；　luxuriating　in　the　calm　she　felt；　but　his　instinct　was　healthier。　They　both　had　work　to　do。
　〃I'd　rather　stay　here　than　return　to　the　studio；〃　he　said。　〃Would　you　mind？〃
　〃Not　at　all；〃　she　replied。　〃In　fact；　I'd　like　you　to　stay。〃
　〃I'll　be　ing　and　going　at　odd　hours。〃
　〃As　long　as　you　find　your　way　back　into　bed　once　in　a　while；〃　she　said。
　〃I'll　be　with　you；〃　he　said；　running　his　hand　down　from　her　neck　to　rub　her　belly。　〃From　now　on；　I'll　be　with　you　night　and　day。〃
　
　10
　
　Though　Jude's　memory　of　the　night　before　was　vivid；　she　had　no　recollection　of　either　herself　or　Gentle　taking　the　telephone　off　the　hook；　and　it　wasn't　until　nine…thirty　the　following　morning；　when　she　decided　to　call　Clem；　that　she　realized　that　one　of　them　had　done　so。　She　replaced　the　receiver；　only　to　have　the　telephone　ring　seconds　later。　At　the　other　end　of　the　line　was　a　voice　she'd　almost　given　up　expecting　to　hear　again：　Oscar。　At　first　she　thought　he　was　breathless；　but　after　a　few　stumbling　sentences　she　realized　his　pantings　were　barely　suppressed　sobs。
　〃Where　have　you　been；　my　darling？　I've　rung　and　rung　since　I　got　your　note。　I　thought　you　were　dead。〃
　〃The　phone　was　off　the　hook；　that's　all。　Where　are　you？〃
　〃At　the　house。　Will　you　e？　Please。　I　need　you　here！〃　He　spoke　with　escalating　panic；　as　though　she　were　punctuating　his　appeals　with　refusals。　〃We　don't　have　much　time。〃
　〃Of　course　I'll　e；〃　she　told　him。
　〃Now；〃　he　insisted。　〃You've　got　to　e　now。〃
　She　told　him　she'd　be　on　his　doorstep　within　the　hour；　and　he　replied　that　she'd　find　him　waiting。　Putting　off　her　call　to　Clem　and　putting　on　a　little　makeup；　she　headed　out。　Though　it　wasn't　yet　midmorning　the　sun　was　blazing　hot；　and　as　she　drove　she　remembered　the　monologue　that　she　and　Gentle　had　been　treated　to　on　their　ride　back　from　the　estate。　Monsoons　and　heat　waves　all　through　the　summer；　the　doomsayer　had　predicted；　and　how　he'd　relished　his　prophecies！　She'd　thought　his　enthusiasm　grotesque　at　the　time；　a　petty　mind　indulging　in　apocalyptic　fantasies。　But　now；　after　the　extraordinary　night　she'd　had　with　Gentle；　she　found　herself　wondering　how　these　bright　streets　might　be　made　to　experience　the　miracles　of　the　previous　midnight：　sluiced　of　vehicles　by　an　almighty　rain；　then　softened　in　the　blaze　of　sun；　so　that　solid　matter　flowed　like　warm　treacle　and　a　city　divided　into　public　places　and　private；　into　wealthy　ghettoes　and　gutters；　became　a　continuum。　Was　this　what　Gentle　had　meant　when　he'd　talked　about　her　sharing　his　vision？　If　so；　she　was　ready　for　more。
　Regent's　Park　Road　was　quieter　than　usual。　There　were　no　kids　playing　on　the　pavement　and；　though　she'd　had　a　hellish　time　carving　her　way　through　the　traffic　just　two　streets　away；　no　vehicles　parked　within　half　a　mile　of　the　house。　It　stood　shunned；　but　for　her。　She　didn't　need　to　knock。　Before　she'd　even　set　her　heel　on　the　step　the　door　was　opening；　and　there　was　Oscar；　looking　harried；　beckoning　her　in。　He　answered　the　door　dry…eyed；　but　as　soon　as　it　was　closed　and　locked　and　bolted；　he　put　his　arms　around　her　and　the　tears　began；　great　sobs　that　racked　his　bulk。　Over　and　over　he　told　her　how　much　he　loved　her；　missed　her；　and　needed　her；　now　more　than　ever。　She　embraced　him　and　calmed　him　as　best　she　could。　After　a　time　he　controlled　himself　and　ushered　her　through　to　the　kitchen。　The　lights　were　burning　throughout　the　house；　but　after　the　blaze　of　the　day　their　contribution　looked　jaundiced　and　didn't　flatter　him。　His　face　was　pale；　where　it　wasn't　discolored　with　bruises；　his　hands　were　puffed　and　raw。　There　were　other　wounds；　she　guessed；　beneath　his　unpressed　clothes。　Watching　him　brew　Earl　Grey　for　them；　she　saw　a　look　of　disfort　cross　his　face　when　he　moved　too　fast。　Their　talk；　of　course；　rapidly　turned　to　their　parting　at　the　Retreat。
　〃I　was　certain　Dowd　would　slit　your　throat　as　soon　as　you　got　to　Yzordderrex。〃
　〃He　didn't　lay　a　finger　on　me；〃　she　said。　Then　added；　〃That's　not　quite　true。　He　did　later。　But　when　we　arrived　he　was　too　badly　hurt。〃　She　paused。　〃So　are　you。〃
　〃I　was　in　a　pretty　wretched　state；〃　he　said。　〃I　wanted　to　follow　you；　but　I　could　barely　stand。　I　came　back　here；　got　a　gun；　licked　my　wounds　awhile；　then　crossed　over。　But　by　that　time　you'd　gone。〃
　〃So　you　did　follow？〃
　〃Of　course。　Did　you　think　I'd　leave　you　in　Yzordderrex？〃
　He　set　a　large　cup　of　tea　in　front　of　her；　and　honey　to　sweeten　it　with。　She　didn't　usually　indulge；　but　she　hadn't　breakfasted；　so　she　put　enough　spoonfuls　of　honey　into　the　tea　to　turn　it　into　an　aromatic　syrup。
　〃By　the　time　I　reached　Peccable's　house；〃　Oscar　went　on；　〃it　was　empty。　There　were　riots　going　on　outside。　I　didn't　know　where　to　start　looking　for　you。　It　was　a　nightmare。〃
　〃You　know　the　Autarch　was　deposed？〃
　〃No；　I　didn't；　but　I'm　not　surprised。　Every　New　Year；　Peccable　would　say；　He'll　go　this　year；　he'll　go　this　year。　What　happened　to　Dowd；　by　the　way？〃
　〃He's　dead；〃　she　said；　with　a　little　smile　of　satisfaction。
　〃Are　you　sure？　His　type　is　difficult　to　kill；　my　dear；　let　me　tell　you。　I　speak　from　bitter　experience。〃
　〃You　were　saying…〃
　〃Yes。　What　was　I　saying？〃
　〃That　you　followed　us　a