sk.petsematary-第54章

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　　Along　the　other；　he　saw　some　sort　of　monster　emerging　from　the　woods　behind　the　house。　He　had　accepted　so　much　that　he　did　not　balk　at　the　idea　of　monsters；　or　even　of　daemons；　discorporeal　beings　of　evil　from　the　outerworid　which　might　well　take　charge　of　a　reanimated　body　from　which　the　original　soul　had　fled。
　　Either　way；　he　and　his　son　would　be　alone。　And　he　would。
　　I　will　make　a　diagnosis。
　　Yes。　That　is　what　he　would　do。
　　I　will　make　a　diagnosis；　not　only　of　his　body　but　of　his　spirit。　I　will　make　allowances　for　the　trauma　of　the　accident　itself；　which　he　may　or　may　not　remember。　Keeping　the　example　of　Church　before　me；　I　will　expect　retardation；　perhaps　mild；　perhaps　profound。　I　will　judge　our　ability　to　reintegrate　Gage　into　our　family　on　the　basis　of　what　I　see　over　a　period　of　from　twenty…four　to　seventy…two　hours。　And　if　the　loss　is　too　great…or　if　he　es　back　as　Timmy　Baterman　apparently　came　back；　as　a　thing　of　evil…i　will　kill　him。
　　As　a　doctor；　he　felt　he　could　kill　Gage；　if　Gage　was　only　the　vessel　containing　some　other　being；　quite　easily。　He　would　not　allow　himself　to　be　swayed　by　its　pleadings　or　its　wiles。　He　would　kill　it　as　he　would　kill　a　rat　carrying　bubonic　plague。　There　need　be　no　melodrama　about　it。　A　pill　in　solution；　perhaps　two　or　three　of　them。　If　necessary；　a　shot。　There　was　morphine　in　his　bag。　The　following　night；　he　would　return　the　lifeless　clay　to　Pleasantview　and　reenter　it；　simply　trusting　that　his　luck　would　hold　a　second　time　（you　don't　even　know　if　it　will　hold　once；　he　reminded　himself）。　He　had　considered　the　easier　and　safer　alternative　of　the　Pet　Sematary；　but　he　would　not　have　his　son　up　there。　There　were　a　lot　of　reasons。　A　child　burying　his　pet　five　years　or　ten　years　or　even　twenty　years　later　might　stumble　on　the　remains…　that　was　one　reason。　But　the　most　pelling　one　was　simpler。　The　Pet　Sematary　might　be。　。　。　too　close。
　　The　reinterment　pleted；　he　would　fly　to　Chicago　and　join　his　family。　Neither　Rachel　nor　Ellie　would　ever　need　to　know　about　his　failed　experiment。
　　Then；　looking　along　the　other　path…the　path　he　hoped　for　blindly　with　all　his　love　for　his　son：　he　and　Gage　would　leave　the　house　when　the　examination　period　was　over；　would　leave　at　night。　He　would　take　certain　papers　with　him　and　plan　never　to　return　to　Ludlow　again。　He　and　Gage　would　check　into　a　motel…perhaps　this　very　one　in　which　he　now　lay。
　　The　following　morning　he　would　cash　every　account　they　had；　converting　everything　into　American　Express　traveler's　checks　（don't　leave　home　with　your　resurrected　son　without　them；　he　thought）　and　flat　cash。　He　and　Gage　would　fly　somewhere…　Florida；　most　likely。　From　there　he　would　call　Rachel；　tell　her　where　he　was；　tell　her　to　take　Ellie　and　catch　a　plane　without　telling　her　mother　and　father　where　she　was　going。　Louis　believed　he　could　convince　her　to　do　this。　Ask　no　questions；　Rachel。　Just　e。　e　now。　This　minute。
　　He　would　tell　her　where　he　（they）　were　staying。　Some　motel。　She　and　Ellie　would　arrive　in　a　rental　car。　He　would　bring　Gage　to　the　door　when　they　knocked。　Perhaps　Gage　would　be　wearing　a　bathing　suit。
　　And　then…　Ah；　but　beyond　that　he　did　not　dare　go；　instead　he　turned　back　to　the　plan's　beginning　and　began　to　go　over　it　again。　He　supposed　that　if　things　worked　out；　it　would　mean　accumulating　the　identification　minutae　of　whole　new　lives　so　that　Irwin　Goldman　could　not　use　his　overflowing　checkbook　to　trace　them。　Such　things　could　be　done。
　　Vaguely；　he　remembered　arriving　at　the　Ludlow　house；　tense；　tired；　and　more　than　a　little　scared；　and　having　some　fantasy　about　just　driving　down　to　Orlando　and　hiring　on　as　a　medic　at　Disney　World。　Maybe　that　wasn't　so　farfetched　after　all。
　　He　saw　himself；　dressed　in　white；　resuscitating　a　pregnant　woman　who　had　foolishly　gone　on　the　Magic　Mountain　ride　and　had　fainted。　Stand　back；　stand　back；　give　her　some　air；　he　heard　himself　saying；　and　the　woman　opened　her　eyes　and　smiled　gratefully　at　him。
　　As　his　mind　spun　out　this　not　disagreeable　fantasy；　Louis　fell　asleep。　He　slept　as　his　daughter　awoke　in　an　airplane　somewhere　above　Niagara　Falls；　screaming　from　a　nightmare　of　clutching　hands　and　stupid　yet　merciless　eyes；　he　slept　as　the　stewardess　rushed　down　the　aisle　to　see　what　was　wrong；　he　slept　as　Rachel；　totally　unnerved；　tried　to　soothe　her；　he　slept　as　Ellie　cried　over　and　over　again：　It's　Gage！　Mommy！　It's　Gage！　it's　Gage！　Gage　is　alive！　Gage　has　got　the　knife　from　Daddy's　bag！　Don't　let　him　get　me！　Don't　let　him　get　Daddy！
　　He　slept　as　Ellie　quieted　at　last　and　lay　shuddering　against　her　mother's　breast；　her　eyes　wide　and　tearless；　and　as　Dory　Goldman　thought　what　an　awful　thing　all　of　this　had　been　for　Eileen；　and　how　much　she　reminded　Dory　of　Rachel　after　Zelda　had　died。
　　He　slept　and　woke　up　at　a　quarter　past　five；　with　the　afternoon　light　beginning　to　slant　down　toward　the　ing　night。
　　Wild　work；　he　thought　stupidly　and　got　up。
　　　45
　　By　the　time　United　Airlines　flight　419　touched　down　at　O'Hare　Airport　and　offloaded　its　passengers　at　ten　minutes　past　three；　central　standard　time；　Ellie　Creed　was　in　a　state　of　low　hysteria；　and　Rachel　was　very　frightened。
　　If　you　touched　Ellie　casually　on　the　shoulder；　she　jumped　and　stared　around　at　you　with　big　walleyes；　and　her　whole　body　quivered　steadily　and　without　letup。　It　was　as　if　she　were　full　of　electricity。　The　nightmare　on　the　airplane　had　been　bad　enough；　but　this。　。　。　Rachel　simply　didn't　know　how　to　cope　with　it。
　　Going　into　the　terminal；　Ellie　tripped　over　her　own　feet　and　fell　down。　She　did　not　get　up　but　merely　lay　there　on　the　carpet　with　people　passing　around　her　（or　looking　down　at　her　with　that　mildly　sympathetic　but　disconnected　glance　of　people　who　are　in　transit　and　cannot　be　bothered）　until　Rachel　picked　her　up　in　her　arms。
　　〃Ellie；　what's　wrong　with　you？〃　Rachel　asked。
　　But　Ellie　would　not　answer。　They　moved　across　the　lobby　toward　the　luggage　carousels；　and　Rachel　saw　her　mother　and　father　waiting　there　for　them。　She　waved　at　them　with　her　free　hand；　and　they　came　over。
　　〃They　told　us　not　to　go　to　the　gate　and　wait　for　you；〃　Dory　said；　〃so　we　thought。　。　。　Rachel？　How's　Eileen？〃
　　〃Not　good。〃
　　〃Is　there　a　ladies'　room；　Mommy？　I'm　going　to　throw　up。〃
　　〃Oh；　God；〃　Rachel　said　despairingly　and　took　her　by　the　hand。　There　was　a　ladies'　room　across　the　lobby；　and　she　led　Ellie　toward　it　quickly。
　　〃Rachel；　shall　I　corner'　Dory　called。
　　〃No；　get　the　luggage；　you　know　what　it　looks　like。　We're　okay。〃
　　Mercifully　the　ladies'　room　was　deserted。　Rachel　led　Ellie　to　one　of　the　stalls；　fumbling　in　her　purse　for　a　dime；　and　then　she　saw…thank　God…that　the　locks　on　three　of　them　were　broken。　Over　one　broken　lock；　someone　had　written　in　grease　pencil：　
　　SIR　JOHN　CRAPPER　WAS　A　SEXIST　PIG！
　　Rachel　pulled　the　door　open　quickly；　Ellie　was　now　moaning　and　holding　her　stomach。　She　retched　twice；　but　there　was　no　vomiting；　they　were　the　dry　heaves　of　total　nervous　exhaustion。
　　When　Ellie　told　her　she　felt　a　little　better；　Rachel　took　her　over　to　the　basins　and　washed　her　daughter's　face。　Ellie　was　wretchedly　white；　and　there　were　circles　under　her　eyes。
　　〃Ellie；　what　is　wrong？　Can't　you　tell　me？〃
　　〃I　don't　know　what's　wrong；〃　she　said。　〃But　I　knew　something　was　wrong　ever　since　Daddy　told　me　about　the　trip。　Because　something　was　wrong　with　him。〃
　　Louis；　what　are　you　hiding？　You　were　hiding　something。　I　could　see　it；　even　Ellie　could　see　it。
　　It　occurred　to　her　that　she　had　also　been　nervous　all　day；　as　though　waiting　for　a　blow　to　fall。　She　felt　the　way　she　did　in　the　two　or　three　days　before　her　period；　tense　and　on　edge；　ready　to　laugh　or　cry　or　get　a　headache　that　would　e　bulleting　through　like　a　fast　express；　there　and　then　gone　three　hours　later。
　　〃What？〃　she　said　now　to　Ellie's　reflection　in　the　mirror。　〃Honey；　what　could　be　wrong　with　Daddy？〃
　　〃I　don't　know；〃　Ellie　said。　〃It　was　the　dream。　Something　about
　　Gage。　Or　maybe　it　was　Church。　I　don't　remember。　I　don't　know。〃
　　〃Ellie；　what　was　your　dream？〃
　　〃I　dreamed　I　was　in　the　Pet　Sematary；〃　Ellie　said。　〃Paxcow　took　me　to　the　Pet　Sematary　and　said　Daddy　was　going　to　go　there　and　something　terrible　was　going　to　happen。〃
　　〃Paxcow？〃　A　bolt　of　terror　both　sharp　and　yet　undefined　struck　her。　What　was　that　name；　and　why　did　it　seem　familiar？　It　seemed　that　she　had　heard　that　name…or　one　like　it…but　she　could　not　for　the　life　of　her　remember　where。　〃You　dreamed　someone　named　Paxcow　took　you　to　the　Pet　Sematary？〃
　　〃Yes；　that's　what　he　said　his　name　was。　And…〃　Her　eyes　suddenly　widened。
　　〃Do　you　remember　something　else？〃
　　〃He　said　that　he　was　sent　to　warn　but　that　he　couldn't　interfere。　He　said　that　he　was。　。　。　I　don't　know。　。　。　that　he　was　near　Daddy　because　they　were　together　when　his　soul　was　dis…disI　can't　remember！〃　she　wailed。
　　〃Honey；〃　Rachel　said；　〃I　think　you　dreamed　about　the　Pet　Sematary　because　you're　still　thinking　about　Gage。　And　I'm　sure　Daddy　is　fine。　Do　you　feel　any　better　now？〃
　　〃No；〃　Ellie　whispered。　〃Mommy；　I'm　scared。　Aren't　you　scared？〃
　　〃Huh…uh；〃　Rachel　said；　with　a　brisk　little　shake　of　her　head　and　a　smile…but　she　was；　she　was　scared；　and　that　name；　Fax…cow；　haunted　her　with　its　familiarity。　She　felt　she　had　heard　it　in　some　dreadful　context　months　or　even　years　ago；　and　that　nervy　feeling　would　not　leave　her。
　　She　felt　something…something　pregnant；　swollen；　and　waiting　to　burst。　Something　terrible　that　needed　to　be　averted。　But　what？　What？
　　〃I'm　sure　everything　is　fine；〃　she　told　Ellie。　〃Want　to　go　back　to　Grandma　and　Grandda？〃
　　〃I　guess　so；〃　Ellie　said　listlessly。
　　A　Puerto　Rican　woman　led　her　very　young　son　into　the　ladies'；　scolding　him。　A　large　wet　stain　had　spread　on　the　crotch　of　the　little　boy's　Bermudas　and　Rachel　found　herself　reminded　of　Gage　with　a　kind　of　paralyzing　poignancy。　This　fresh　sorrow　was　like　novocaine；　smothering　her　jitters。
　　〃e　on；〃　she　said。　〃We'll　call　Daddy　from　Grandda's　house。〃
　　〃He　was　wearing　shorts；〃　Ellie　said　suddenly；　looking　back　at　the　little　boy。
　　〃Who　was；　honey？〃
　　〃Paxcow；〃　Ellie　said。　〃He　was　wearing　red　shorts　in　my　dream。
　　That　brought　the　name　momentarily　into　focus；　and　Rachel　felt　that　knee…weakening　fear　again。　。　。　then　it　danced　away。
　　They　could　not　get　close　to　the　luggage　carousel；　Rachel　could　just　see　the　top　of　her　father's　hat；　the　one　with　the　feather。　Dory　Goldman　was　holding　two　seats　against　the　wall　for　them　and　waving。　Rachel　brought　Ellie　over。
　　〃Are　you　feeling　any　better；　dear？〃　Dory　asked。
　　〃A　little　bit；〃　Ellie　said。　〃Mommy…〃
　　She　turned　to　Rachel　and　broke　off。　Rachel　was　sitting　bolt　upright；　her　hand　clapped　to　her　mouth；　her　face　white。　She　had　it。　It　had　suddenly　gone　through　with　a　terrible　thud。　Of　course　she　should　have　known　at　once；　but　she　had　tried　to　put　it　out　of　her　mind。　Of　course。
　　〃Mommy？〃
　　Rachel　turned　slowly　to　her　daughter；　and　Ellie　could　hear　the　tendons　in　her　neck　creak。　She　took　her　hand　away　from　her　mouth。
　　〃Did　the　man　in　your　dream　tell　you　his　first　name；　Eileen？〃
　　〃Mommy；　are　you　all…〃
　　〃Did　the　man　in　your　dream　tell　you　his　first　name？〃
　　Dory　was　looking　at　her