lh.narcissusinchains-第17章

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　feeling　in　that　arm。　I　used　the　seconds　I　had　　the　ones　he　used　to　cut　me　　and　it　didn't　hurt　to　turn　the　sword　in　my　right　hand　and　plunge　it　backwards；　behind　me　without　turning　to　see　where　he　was。　It　was　as　if　I　could　feel　him　behind　me；　as　if　I　knew　just　where　he　stood。　I　felt　the　blade　bite　into　flesh。　I　shoved　upward；　ing　to　my　feet　with　the　force　of　the　blow；　shoving　the　blade　backwards；　inwards；　through　him；　as　hard　as　I　could。　I　had　never　done　anything　like　that　before；　but　the　movement　felt　like　old　memory。　And　I　knew　it　wasn't　my　memory。　It　wasn't　my　body　that　remembered　now　to　turn　the　sword　as　I　turned　my　body　to　do　extra　damage；　scrambling　internal　organs　as　I　drew　the　blade　out；　and　raised　it　over　the　kneeling　figure。　I　raised　the　sword　one…handed。　This　I　knew　how　to　do。　I'd　been　taking　heads　off　of　bodies　for　years。　The　blade　was　on　its　downward　stroke　when　he　screamed；　〃Enough！〃　I　didn't　stop　or　even　hesitate。
　It　was　Jamil　who　launched　himself　into　me；　over　the　man's　bowed　head。　He　pinned　me　to　the　wall；　one　hand　on　my　wrist；　while　I　fought　him。　〃Anita；　Anita！〃
　I　looked　up　at　him；　and　it　was　as　if　I　was　just　realizing　who　he　was；　or　what　he　was　doing。　I'd　known；　but　only　in　theory；　my　body　had　been　about　to　take　the　snake　man's　head。　My　body　relaxed　in　Jamil's　grip；　but　he　didn't　let　me　go。
　〃Talk　to　me；　Anita。〃
　〃I'm　alright。〃
　〃He　gives。　We　win。　You　get　your　leopards。〃　His　hand　went　to　my　hand　where　it　still　gripped　the　sword。　〃Ease　down；　you　won。〃
　I　tried　to　keep　the　sword；　but　Jamil　wasn't　happy　until　I　let　him　take　it。　Then　he　moved　slowly　away　from　me；　and　I　was　left　looking　down　at　Coronus　still　kneeling　on　the　floor；　holding　his　claws　against　the　blood　that　was　flowing　from　his　side。　He　looked　up　at　me　and　coughed；　a　little　blood　touching　his　lips。　He　licked　it　off。　〃You　nicked　a　lung。〃
　〃It's　not　silver。　You'll　heal。〃
　He　laughed；　but　it　seemed　to　hurt　him。　〃We'll　all　heal；〃　he　said。
　〃You　better　hope　Gregory　heals；〃　I　said。
　His　black　eyes　flicked　up　to　me；　and　there　was　something　in　that　look　that　I　didn't　like。　〃What　is　it；　Coronus；　what　puts　such　unease　in　your　eyes？〃　I　went　to　my　knees　in　front　of　him。　My　left　arm　hung　nearly　useless　at　my　side；　but　it　wasn't　numb　anymore。　A　deep　burning　pain　was　working　its　way　from　the　wounds　at　my　shoulder　and　lower　back。　I　purposefully　didn't　look　at　them。　I　could　feel　the　blood　flowing　down　my　skin　in　tickling　lines。　I　kept　my　gaze　on　Coronus's　eyes。
　He　met　my　eyes　for　a　minute　while　Jamil　loomed　over　us；　then　Coronus's　gaze　did　a　small　slide　to　his　right。　I　followed　his　look　and　saw　Nathaniel　across　the　wide　room　for　the　first　time　clearly。　The　world　swam　in　streams　of　color；　and　I　would　have　fallen　to　the　floor　if　my　right　arm　hadn't　caught　me。　It　was　partly　from　blood　loss　and　shock；　but　not　all　of　it　was　from　the　wounds。　I　could　hear　Coronus　speaking　through　the　dizziness　and　the　nausea。
　His　words　were　tripping　over　each　other。　〃Remember　that　it　was　the　hyenas　who　made　us　stop。　They　who　decreed　that　nothing　else　was　to　be　done　until　your　arrival。　We　would　never　have　been　so　cruel　unless　we　intended　to　kill　him。〃
　My　vision　cleared；　and　all　I　could　do　was　stare。　Nathaniel　was　nude；　hanging　from　his　wrists；　ankles　chained　like　Gregory's　had　been。　But　Nathaniel　was　facing　the　room。　Knives　bisected　each　tricep。　Smaller　blades　had　been　forced　through　each　hand　so　he　couldn't　close　his　fingers　around　them。　Thin　knives　had　been　forced　through　the　bulk　of　the　muscles　just　above　each　of　his　collarbones。　Then　the　swords　began。
　Sword　blades　stuck　out　just　below　his　collarbones。　The　blades　gleamed　silver；　sprinkled　with　drying　blood。　Unlike　the　knives；　the　swords　had　been　shoved　in　from　behind　so　you　couldn't　see　the　hilts。
　A　wide　curved　sword　stuck　out　of　Nathaniel's　right　side；　through　the　meat　of　his　body。　There　were　more；　too　big　to　be　knives；　too　small　to　be　swords；　bisecting　his　thighs；　his　calves。
　I　was　on　my　feet　and　didn't　even　remember　standing　up。　I　was　walking　towards　him；　my　left　arm　hanging　down；　blood　spilling　from　my　fingers。　The　thing　that　I　hadn't　expected　when　I　saw　the　damage　was　his　eyes。　Those　lilac　eyes　of　his　were　open；　staring　at　me；　full　of　things　that　I　didn't　want　to　understand。　A　gag　filled　his　mouth；　cut　across　that　long　auburn　hair。　He　watched　me　with　wide　eyes　as　I　walked　to　him。
　I　stood　in　front　of　Nathaniel　and　tried　to　get　the　gag　out　of　his　mouth；　but　I　couldn't　do　it　one…handed。　Faust　was　there；　breaking　the　thong；　helping　me　take　it　out　gently。　I　touched　Nathaniel's　mouth；　trying　to　stop　him　from　making　any　noise。　I　looked　down　the　length　of　his　body。　All　the　blood！　All　the　blood　drying；　stiff　and　tacky　against　his　skin。　I　couldn't　not　look　at　the　blades；　and　from　inches　away　I　saw　something　that　couldn't　be　true。　I　lowered　my　hand　from　his　mouth　towards　the　sword　blade　that　protruded　from　his　upper　chest。　I　touched　the　dried　blood；　rubbed　at　it　with　my　fingertips。　Nathaniel　made　a　small　moan。　I　didn't　stop；　I　had　to　be　sure。　I　cleared　the　blood　enough　to　see；　enough　to　feel　that　his　skin　had　closed　around　the　blades。　In　the　two　hours　it　had　taken　me　to　get　to　this　room；　his　body　had　reknit　itself　with　the　blades　inside　of　him。
　I　dropped　to　my　knees　as　if　I'd　been　hit　between　the　eyes。　I　tried　to　say　something；　but　no　sound　came　out。　Jamil　was　there；　kneeling　beside　me。　I　grabbed　a　handful　of　the　leather　straps　across　his　chest。　There　was　fresh　blood　on　him；　wounds　in　his　arms　and　chest。
　I　finally　managed　to　say；　〃How；　how　do　we　。。。　fix　this？〃
　He　looked　up　at　Nathaniel。　〃We　pull　the　blades　out。〃
　I　shook　my　head。　〃Help　me　up。〃　The　blood　loss　and　the　sheer　horror　were　catching　up　with　me。　I　felt　sick；　dizzy。　Jamil　helped　me　stand　in　front　of　Nathaniel。　〃Do　you　understand　what　we're　going　to　have　to　do？〃
　Nathaniel　looked　at　me　with　those　purple　eyes　of　his。　〃Yes；〃　he　said；　softly；　almost　no　sound　at　all。
　I　gripped　the　knife　that　was　in　his　quadricep；　hand　wrapping　around　the　hilt。　My　lower　lip　was　trembling；　and　my　eyes　felt　hot。　I　stared　into　his　eyes；　no　flinching；　no　looking　away。　I　took　a　deep　breath；　and　I　pulled　it　out。　His　eyes　closed；　his　head　thrust　backwards；　breath　ing　out　in　a　hissing　rush。　The　flesh　clung　to　the　blade。　It　wasn't　like　taking　a　knife　out　of　a　roast。　The　flesh　hugged　the　blade　as　if　it　had　grown　around　it。
　The　bloody　knife　fell　from　my　hand；　making　a　sharp　sound　on　the　cement　floor。　Nathaniel　screamed。　Jamil　was　behind　him；　and　one　of　the　swords　was　missing　from　Nathaniel's　upper　chest。　The　other　sword　sucked　back　through　his　body　as　I　watched。　Nathaniel　screamed　again。　Blood　welled　from　the　wound　and　I　turned　away。　I　looked　back　at　Coronus　still　crouched　on　the　floor；　two　of　his　people　crowded　around　him。　Something　in　the　look　on　my　face　must　have　frightened　him；　because　his　eyes　widened；　and　I　saw　something　like　human　fear　cross　his　reptilian　face。
　〃We　would　have　taken　the　blades　out；　but　the　hyenas　ordered　us　not　to　touch　either　of　them　again　until　you　arrived。〃
　I　looked　across　the　room　at　the　guard　that　was　closest　to　Nathaniel。　The　one　that　had　looked　unhappy　to　be　there。　He　flinched　under　my　gaze。　〃I　was　following　orders。〃
　〃Is　that　an　excuse　or　a　defense？〃
　〃We　don't　owe　you　an　excuse；〃　the　other　guard　said；　the　tall　brown…haired　one　that　had　let　us　into　the　room。　He　was　standing　by　the　closed　door。　He　was　arrogant；　defiant；　and　I　could　taste　his　fear　like　candy　on　my　tongue。　He　was　afraid　of　what　I'd　do。
　Gregory　came　to　stand　near　me　in　half…leopard；　half…man　form。　I'd　never　seen　him　like　this；　all　spotted　fur；　taller　than　his　human　form；　more　muscled。　His　genitalia　hung　large　and　healed　between　his　legs。
　One　of　the　snake　men　was　on　the　floor；　dragging　its　legs　behind　it。　Its　spine　was　broken；　but　it　would　heal。　Another　scream　tore　from　behind　me；　from　Nathaniel's　throat。　Another　snake　man　was　huddled　against　the　far　wall　beside　the　chained　brunette。　Its　arm　was　almost　torn　from　its　socket。　Sylvie's　dress　was　in　shreds；　baring　her　breasts　to　the　world。　She　didn't　seem　to　care；　her　hands　still　curled　into　claws；　pale　wolf　eyes　staring　back　at　me。
　〃Take　your　leopards；〃　Coronus　said；　〃and　go　in　peace。〃
　Another　scream　came　on　the　end　of　his　words。　〃Peace；〃　I　said。　I　felt　strangely　numb；　like　part　of　me　was　folding　away。　I　couldn't　stand　in　this　room　and　listen　to　Nathaniel's　screams；　and　feel。　Not　and　stay　sane。　A　quietness　that　I　sunk　into　when　I　killed　spilled　over　me；　and　it　felt　so　much　better。　There　are　worse　things　than　emptiness。
　〃Who　are　the　women？〃
　〃Swanmanes；〃　he　said。　〃No　concern　of　yours；　Nimir…Ra。〃
　I　looked　at　him　and　felt　a　smile　curl　my　lips。　I　knew　it　was　an　unpleasant　smile。　〃What　happens　to　them　when　we　leave？〃
　〃They'll　heal；〃　he　said。　〃We　don't　want　them　dead。〃
　My　smile　widened；　I　couldn't　help　it。　I　laughed；　but　it　was　a　bad　sound；　even　to　me。　〃You　expect　me　to　leave　them　to　your　mercy？〃
　〃They　are　swans　not　leopards。　Why　should　you　care？〃
　Nathaniel's　voice　came　thick；　and　when　I　turned　I　saw　tears　sliding　down　his　face。　〃Don't　leave　them。　Please；　don't　leave　them　here。〃
　Jamil　pulled　another　blade　out。　Only　three　to　go。　Nathaniel　didn't　scream　this　time；　just　closed　his　eyes　and　shivered。　〃Please；　Anita；　they　would　never　have　e　here　if　I　hadn't　asked　them。〃
　I　looked　at　the　three　women；　chained　naked　to　the　walls；　gagged；　surrounded　by　dozens　of　clean；　unused　blades。　They　watched　me　with　wide　eyes；　their　breath　ing　in　quick　shallow　pants。　Their　fear　slid　down　my　throat　as　if　it　were　wine　and　I　could　drink　it　down；　deep　and　cool。　Fear；　like　wine；　goes　good　with　food。　And　I　knew　just　by　looking　that　they　were　food。　They　were　swans；　not　predators。　They　were　not　us。　I　was　channeling　Richard　now。　I　was　being　a　smorgasbord　of　the　boys　tonight；　of　their　thoughts　and　feelings。　But　there　was　one　thing　that　was　my　own。　Rage。　Not　the　hot　rage　that　the　wolves　used　when　they　killed。　This　was　something　colder　and　more　sure　of　itself。　It　was　a　rage　that　had　nothing　to　do　with　blood　and　everything　to　do　with　。。。　death。　I　wanted　them　all　dead　for　what　they'd　done　to　Nathaniel　and　Gregory。　I　wanted　them　dead。　By　the　rules；　I　couldn't　have　them　dead；　but　I'd　do　what　I　could。　I'd　cheat　them　of　their　other　victims。　I　would　not；　could　not；　leave　the　three　women　here　like　this。　I　could　not　do　it。　Simple　as　that。
　〃Don't　worry；　Nathaniel；　we　won't　leave　them　behind。〃
　〃You　have　no　right　to　them；〃　Coronus　said。
　Gregory　growled　at　him。　I　touched　Gregory's　furred　arm。　〃It's　alright。〃　I　looked　at　Coronus　surrounded　by　his　snakes。　〃If　I　were　you　I　wouldn't　tell　me　what　I　have　a　right　to。　If　I　were　you；　I'd　shut　the　fuck　up　and　let　us　walk　out　of　here　with　everyone　we　came　for。〃
　〃No；　they　are　ours　until　their　swan　king　rescues　them。〃
　〃Hey；　he's　not　here；　but　I　am；　and　I　say　to　you；　Coronus　of　the　Black　Water　Clan；　that　I　will　take　the　swanmanes　with　me。　I　will　not　leave　them　behind。〃
　〃Why？　Why　do　you　care？〃
　〃Why？　Partly　because　I　just　don't　like　you。　Partly　because　I　want　you　dead　and　I　can't　do　that　tonight　according　to　lycanthrope　law。　So　I'll　cheat　you　of　your　prize。　That　will　have　to　suffice。　But　don't　ever；　ever　get　in　my　way　again；　because　I　will　kill　you；　Coronus。　I　will　kill　you。　In　fact；　I'd