lmb.shardsofhonor-第23章

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　〃I　hadn't　expected　to　get　the　cream　of　the　Service。〃
　〃They　used　to　call　it　Vorkosigan's　Leper　Colony；　at　headquarters。〃
　〃With　myself　as　leper…in…chief；　eh？〃　Vorkosigan　seemed　more　amused　than　offended。　〃Well；　if　they　were　the　worst　the　Service　has　to　offer；　perhaps　we　shall　not　do　so　badly　after　all。　Take　care　of　yourself。　I　don't　fancy　being　his　second…in…mand。〃
　Vorhalas　chuckled；　and　they　shook　hands。　He　started　for　the　door；　then　paused。　〃Do　you　think　they'll　counterattack？〃
　〃My　God；　of　course　they'll　counterattack。　This　isn't　some　trade　outpost。　These　people　are　fighting　for　their　homes。〃
　〃When？〃
　Vorkosigan　hesitated。　〃Sometime　after　you've　started　disembarking　ground　troops；　but　well　before　it's　pleted。　Wouldn't　you？　Worst　time　to　have　to　start　a　retreat。　Shuttles　not　knowing　whether　to　go　up　or　down；　their　mother　ships　scattering　to　hell　and　gone　under　fire；　supplies　needed　not　landed；　supplies　landed　not　needed；　the　chain　of　mand　disrupted…an　inexperienced　mander　in　absolute　control。。。〃
　〃You　give　me　the　shivers。〃
　〃Yes；　well…try　to　hold　the　start　for　as　long　as　possible。　And　make　sure　your　troopship　manders　have　their　contingency　orders　crystal　clear。〃
　〃The　Prince　doesn't　see　it　your　way。〃
　〃Yes；　he's　itching　to　lead　a　parade。〃
　〃What　do　you　advise？〃
　〃I'm　not　your　mander　this　time；　Rulf。〃
　〃Not　my　fault。　I　remended　you　to　the　Emperor。〃
　〃I　know。　I　wouldn't　take　it。　I　remended　you　instead。〃
　〃So　we　ended　up　with　that　sodomizing　son…of…a…bitch　Vorrutyer。〃　Vorhalas　shook　his　head　bleakly。　〃Something　wrong　there。。。〃
　Vorkosigan　chivvied　him　gently　out　the　door；　blew　out　his　breath　with　a　sigh；　and　remained　standing；　caught　up　in　his　vision　of　the　future。　He　looked　up；　and　met　Cordelia's　eyes　with　unhappy　irony。　〃Wasn't　there　some　character；　when　the　old　Romans　held　their　triumphs；　who　rode　along　whispering　in　the　honored　party's　ear　that　he　was　mortal；　and　death　waited　for　him？　The　old　Romans　probably　thought　he　was　a　pain　in　the　neck；　too。〃
　She　held　her　peace。
　Vorkosigan　and　Illyan　went　to　retrieve　Sergeant　Bothari　from　his　makeshift　and　unfortable　hiding　place。　They　were　halfway　through　the　door　with　him　when　Vorkosigan　swore。　〃He's　stopped　breathing。〃
　Illyan　hissed　explosively；　and　they　laid　Bothari　out　quickly　on　the　friction　matting　on　his　back。　Vorkosigan　laid　his　ear　to　his　chest；　and　felt　his　neck　for　a　pulse。
　〃Son…of…a…bitch。〃　He　doubled　his　fists；　and　brought　them　down　sharply　against　the　Sergeant's　sternum；　then　listened　again。　〃Nothing。〃
　He　rolled　back　on　his　heels；　looking　fierce。　〃Illyan。　Whoever　you　got　that　lizard's　piss　from；　go　find　him　and　get　a　shot　of　the　antidote。　Quickly。　And　quietly。　Very　quietly。〃
　〃How　did　you…what　if…shouldn't　you…is　it　worth…〃　began　Illyan。　He　threw　up　his　hands　helplessly；　and　fled　out　the　door。
　Vorkosigan　looked　at　Cordelia。　〃Do　you　want　to　push；　or　blow？〃
　〃Push；　I　guess。〃
　She　knelt　by　Bothari's　side；　and　Vorkosigan　went　to　his　head；　tilted　it　back；　and　gave　him　his　first　breath　of　air。　Cordelia　pressed　the　heels　of　her　hands　on　his　sternum　and　pushed　with　all　her　strength；　setting　up　the　rhythm。　Push；　push；　push；　blow；　over　and　over；　don't　stop。　After　a　short　time　her　arms　were　shaking；　and　sweat　beaded　on　her　hairline。　She　could　feel　her　own　ribs　grind　with　each　push；　screamingly；　and　her　chest　muscles　knotted　spasmodically。
　〃Got　to　switch。〃
　〃Good。　I'm　hyperventilating。〃
　They　changed　places；　Vorkosigan　taking　over　the　heart　massage；　Cordelia　pinching　Bothari's　nostrils　shut　and　closing　her　mouth　over　his。　His　mouth　was　wet　from　Vorkosigan's　saliva。　The　parody　of　a　kiss　was　horrible；　but　to　shrink　from　it　beneath　contempt。　They　went　on；　and　on。
　Lieutenant　Illyan　returned　at　last；　breathless。　He　knelt　and　pressed　the　new　ampule　against　Bothari's　corded　neck　over　the　carotid　artery。　Nothing　happened。　Vorkosigan　kept　pumping。
　Suddenly；　Bothari　shuddered；　then　stiffened；　arching　his　back。　He　took　an　irregular；　gasping　gulp　of　air；　then　stopped　again。
　〃e　on；〃　urged　Cordelia；　half　to　herself。
　With　a　sharp　spasmodic　intake　he　began　to　breathe　again；　raggedly；　but　persistently。　Cordelia　slumped　from　her　knees　to　a　sitting　position　on　the　floor　and　gazed　at　him　in　joyless　triumph。　〃Suffering　bastard。〃
　〃I　thought　you　saw　meaning　in　that　sort　of　thing；〃　said　Vorkosigan。
　〃In　the　abstract。　Most　days　it's　just　stumbling　around　in　the　dark　with　the　rest　of　creation；　smashing　into　things　and　wondering　why　it　hurts。〃
　Vorkosigan　gazed　at　Bothari　too；　sweat　running　down　his　face。　Then　he　jumped　to　his　feet　and　hurried　to　his　desk。
　〃The　protest。　Have　to　get　it　written　and　filed　before　Vorhalas　leaves；　or　it　will　be　no　damned　good。〃　He　slid　into　his　chair　and　began　rapidly　keying　his　console。
　〃What's　so　important　about　it？〃　asked　Cordelia。
　〃Sh。　Later。〃　He　typed　furiously　for　ten　minutes；　then　set　it　electronically　in　pursuit　of　his　mander。
　Bothari　in　the　meanwhile　continued　to　breathe；　although　his　face　retained　a　deathly　greenish　pallor。
　〃What　do　we　do　now？〃　asked　Cordelia。
　〃Wait。　Pray　that　the　dosage　is　right；〃　he　glanced　irritably　at　Illyan；　〃and　that　it　won't　send　him　into　some　kind　of　manic　state。〃
　〃Shouldn't　we　be　thinking　of　some　way　to　get　them　both　out　of　here？〃　protested　Illyan。
　〃Think　away。〃　Vorkosigan　began　plugging　the　new　data　disks　into　his　console　and　viewing　the　tactical　readouts。　〃But　as　a　hiding　place　it　has　two　advantages　not　shared　by　any　other　spot　on　the　ship。　If　you're　as　good　as　you　claim；　it's　not　monitored　by　either　the　Chief　Political　Officer　or　the　Prince's　men…〃
　〃I'm　quite　sure　I　got　them　all。　I'd　stake　my　reputation　on　it。〃
　〃Right　now　you're　staking　your　life　on　it；　so　you'd　better　be　correct。　Second；　there　are　two　armed　guards　in　the　corridor　to　keep　everybody　out。　You　could　scarcely　ask　for　more。　I　admit　it's　a　bit　crowded。〃
　Illyan　rolled　his　eyes　in　exasperation。　〃I've　diddled　the　Security　search　to　the　limit　I　dare。　I　can't　do　any　more　without　drawing　more　attention　than　I　divert。〃
　〃Will　it　hold　twenty…six　more　hours？〃
　〃Maybe。〃　Illyan　frowned　at　his　charge；　baffled　and　bothered。　〃You　have　something　planned；　don't　you；　sir。〃　It　was　not　a　question。
　〃I？〃　His　fingers　worked　the　keys　of　his　console；　and　reflections　of　colored　light　from　the　readouts　played　over　his　impassive　face。　〃I'm　merely　waiting　in　hope　of　some　reasonable　opportunity。　When　the　Prince　leaves　for　Escobar　most　of　his　own　security　people　will　go　with　him。　Patience；　Illyan。〃
　He　keyed　his　console　again。　〃Vorkosigan　to　Tactics　Room。〃
　〃mander　Venne　here；　sir。〃
　〃Oh；　good。　Venne；　I'd　like　hourly　updates　piped　down　here　from　the　time　the　Prince　and　Admiral　Vorhalas　leave。　And　let　me　know　immediately；　regardless　of　time；　if　you　start　getting　anything　unusual；　anything　not　in　the　plans。〃
　〃Yes；　sir。　The　Prince　and　Admiral　Vorhalas　are　leaving　now；　sir。〃
　〃Very　good。　Carry　on。　Vorkosigan　out。〃
　He　sat　back　and　drummed　his　fingers　on　the　desk。　〃Now　we　wait。　It　will　be　about　twelve　hours　before　the　Prince　reaches　Escobar　orbit。　They'll　be　starting　landings　soon　after　that。　An　hour　for　signals　to　reach　us　from　Escobar。　An　hour　for　signals　to　return。　So　much　lag。　A　battle　can　be　over　in　two　hours。　We　could　cut　the　lag　by　three…quarters　if　the　Prince　would　let　us　move　off　station。〃
　His　casual　tone　barely　masked　his　tension；　in　spite　of　his　advice　to　Illyan。　The　room　in　which　he　sat　scarcely　seemed　to　exist　for　him。　His　mind　moved　with　the　armada　wheeling　in　a　tightening　constellation　around　Escobar；　fast　glittering　couriers；　grim　cruisers；　sluggish　troop　carriers；　bellies　crammed　with　men。　A　light　pen　turned；　forgotten；　in　his　fingers；　around　and　over；　around　and　over。
　〃Hadn't　you　better　eat；　sir？〃　suggested　Illyan。
　〃What？　Oh；　yes；　I　suppose。　And　you；　Cordelia…you　must　be　hungry。　Go　ahead；　Illyan。〃
　Illyan　left　to　forage。　Vorkosigan　worked　at　his　desk　console　for　a　few　more　minutes　before　shutting　it　down　with　a　sigh。　〃I　suppose　I'd　better　think　about　sleep；　too。　Last　time　I　slept　was　on　board　the　General　Vorhartung；　closing　on　Escobar…a　day　and　a　half　ago；　I　guess。　About　the　time　you　were　being　captured。〃
　〃We　were　captured　a　bit　before　that。　We　were　in　tow　for　almost　a　day。〃
　〃Yes。　Congratulations；　by　the　way；　on　a　very　successful　maneuver。　That　wasn't　a　real　battle　cruiser；　I　take　it？〃
　〃I　really　can't　say。〃
　〃Somebody　wants　to　claim　it　as　a　kill。〃
　Cordelia　suppressed　a　grin。　〃Fine　by　me。〃　She　braced　herself　for　more　questioning；　but；　strangely；　he　turned　the　subject。
　〃Poor　Bothari。　I　wish　the　Emperor　might　give　him　a　medal。　I'm　afraid　the　best　I'll　be　able　to　do　for　him　is　get　him　properly　hospitalized。〃
　〃If　the　Emperor　disliked　Vorrutyer　so；　why　did　he　put　him　in　charge？〃
　〃Because　he　was　Grishnov's　man；　and　widely　famous　as　such；　and　the　Princes　favorite。　Putting　all　the　bad　eggs　in　one　basket；　so　to　speak。〃　He　cut　himself　off　with　a　fist…closing　gesture。
　〃He　made　me　feel　like　I'd　met　the　ultimate　in　evil。　I　don't　think　anything　will　really　scare　me；　after　him。〃
　〃Ges　Vorrutyer？　He　was　just　a　little　villain。　An　old…fashioned　craftsman；　making　crimes　one…off。　The　really　unforgivable　acts　are　mitted　by　calm　men　in　beautiful　green　silk　rooms；　who　deal　death　wholesale；　by　the　shipload；　without　lust；　or　anger；　or　desire；　or　any　redeeming　emotion　to　excuse　them　but　cold　fear　of　some　pretended　future。　But　the　crimes　they　hope　to　prevent　in　that　future　are　imaginary。　The　ones　they　mit　in　the　present…they　are　real。〃　His　voice　fell；　as　he　spoke；　so　that　by　the　end　he　was　almost　whispering。
　〃modore　Vorkosigan…Aral…what's　eating　you？　You're　so　keyed　up　I　expect　you　to　start　pacing　the　ceiling　any　minute。〃　Hag…ridden；　she　thought。
　He　laughed　a　little。　〃I　feel　like　it。　It's　the　waiting；　I　expect。　I'm　bad　at　waiting。　Not　a　good　thing；　in　a　soldier。　I　envy　your　ability　to　wait　in　patience。　You　seem　calm　as　moonlight　on　the　water。〃
　〃Is　that　pretty？〃
　〃Very。〃
　〃It　sounds　nice。　We　don't　have　either　one　at　home。〃　She　was　absurdly　pleased　by　the　implied　pliment。
　Illyan　returned　with　a　tray；　and　she　got　no　more　out　of　Vorkosigan。　They　ate；　and　Vorkosigan　took　a　turn　at　sleeping；　or　at　least　lying　on　the　bed　with　his　eyes　shut；　but　getting　up　every　hour　to　view　the　new　tacticals。
　Lieutenant　Illyan　watched　over　his　shoulder；　and　Vorkosigan　pointed　out　salient　features　of　the　strategy　to　him　as　they　came　up。
　〃It　looks　pretty　good　to　me；〃　Illyan　mented　once。　〃I　don't　see　why　you're　so　anxious。　We　really　could　carry　it　off；　in　spite　of　the　Esco's　superior　mand　of　resources　in　the　long　run。　Won't　do　them　any　good　if　it's　all　over　in　the　short　run。〃
　Afraid　to　put　Bothari　back　into　a　deep　a；　they　let　him　return　to　near…consciousness。　He　sat　in　the　corner　in　a　miserable　knot；　drifting　in　and　out　of　sleep　with　bad　dreams　in　both　states。
　Eventually　Illyan　took　himself　off　to　his　own　cabin　to　sleep；　and　Cordelia　had　another　nap　herself。　She　slept　a　long　time；　not　waking　until　Illyan　returned　with　another　tray　of　food。　She　was　being　disoriented　with　respect　to　time；　locked　in　this　changeless　room。　Vorkosigan；　however；　was　tracking　time　by　the　minute　now。　After　they　ate　he　vanished　into　the　bathroom　to　wash　and　shave；　and　returned　in　fresh　dress　gre