道林格雷的画像_奥斯卡·王尔德-第2章

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is　a　portrait　of　the　artist；　not　of　the　sitter。　the　sitter　is　merely　the　accident；　the　occasion。　it　is　not　he　who　is　revealed　by　the　painter；　it　is　rather　the　painter　who；　on　the　coloured　canvas；　reveals　himself。　the　reason　i　will　not　exhibit　this　picture　is　that　i　am　afraid　that　i　have　shown　in　it　the　secret　of　my　own　soul。〃

lord　henry　laughed。　〃and　what　is　that？〃　he　asked。

〃i　will　tell　you；〃　said　hallward；　but　an　expression　of　perplexity　came　over　his　face。

〃i　am　all　expectation；　basil；〃　continued　his　panion；　glancing　at　him。

〃oh；　there　is　really　very　little　to　tell；　harry；〃　answered　the　painter；　〃and　i　am　afraid　you　will　hardly　understand　it。　perhaps　you　will　hardly　believe　it。〃

lord　henry　smiled；　and　leaning　down；　plucked　a　pink…petalled　daisy　from　the　grass　and　examined　it。　〃i　am　quite　sure　i　shall　understand　it；〃　he　replied；　gazing　intently　at　the　little　golden；　white…feathered　disk；　〃and　as　for　believing　things；　i　can　believe　anything；　provided　that　it　is　quite　incredible。〃

the　wind　shook　some　blossoms　from　the　trees；　and　the　heavy　lilac…blooms；　with　their　clustering　stars；　moved　to　and　fro　in　the　languid　air。　a　grasshopper　began　to　chirrup　by　the　wall；　and　like　a　blue　thread　a　long　thin　dragon…fly　floated　past　on　its　brown　gauze　wings。　lord　henry　felt　as　if　he　could　hear　basil　hallwards　heart　beating；　and　wondered　what　was　ing。

〃the　story　is　simply　this；〃　said　the　painter　after　some　time。　〃two　months　ago　i　went　to　a　crush　at　lady　brandons。　you　know　we　poor　artists　have　to　show　ourselves　in　society　from　time　to　time；　just　to　remind　the　public　that　we　are　not　savages。　with　an　evening　coat　and　a　white　tie；　as　you　told　me　once；　anybody；　even　a　stock…broker；　can　gain　a　reputation　for　being　civilized。　well；　after　i　had　been　in　the　room　about　ten　minutes；　talking　to　huge　overdressed　dowagers　and　tedious　academicians；　i　suddenly　became　conscious　that　some　one　was　looking　at　me。　i　turned　half…way　round　and　saw　dorian　gray　for　the　first　time。　when　our　eyes　met；　i　felt　that　i　was　growing　pale。　a　curious　sensation　of　terror　came　over　me。　i　knew　that　i　had　e　face　to　face　with　some　one　whose　mere　personality　was　so　fascinating　that；　if　i　allowed　it　to　do　so；　it　would　absorb　my　whole　nature；　my　whole　soul；　my　very　art　itself。　i　did　not　want　any　external　influence　in　my　life。　you　know　yourself；　harry；　how　independent　i　am　by　nature。　i　have　always　been　my　own　master；　had　at　least　always　been　so；　till　i　met　dorian　gray。　thenbut　i　dont　know　how　to　explain　it　to　you。　something　seemed　to　tell　me　that　i　was　on　the　verge　of　a　terrible　crisis　in　my　life。　i　had　a　strange　feeling　that　fate　had　in　store　for　me　exquisite　joys　and　exquisite　sorrows。　i　grew　afraid　and　turned　to　quit　the　room。　it　was　not　conscience　that　made　me　do　so：　it　was　a　sort　of　cowardice。　i　take　no　credit　to　myself　for　trying　to　escape。〃

〃conscience　and　cowardice　are　really　the　same　things；　basil。　conscience　is　the　trade…name　of　the　firm。　that　is　all。〃

〃i　dont　believe　that；　harry；　and　i　dont　believe　you　do　either。　however；　whatever　was　my　motiveand　it　may　have　been　pride；　for　i　used　to　be　very　proudi　certainly　struggled　to　the　door。　there；　of　course；　i　stumbled　against　lady　brandon。　you　are　not　going　to　run　away　so　soon；　mr。　hallward？　she　screamed　out。　you　know　her　curiously　shrill　voice？〃

〃yes；　she　is　a　peacock　in　everything　but　beauty；〃　said　lord　henry；　pulling　the　daisy　to　bits　with　his　long　nervous　fingers。

〃i　could　not　get　rid　of　her。　she　brought　me　up　to　royalties；　and　people　with　stars　and　garters；　and　elderly　ladies　with　gigantic　tiaras　and　parrot　noses。　she　spoke　of　me　as　her　dearest　friend。　i　had　only　met　her　once　before；　but　she　took　it　into　her　head　to　lionize　me。　i　believe　some　picture　of　mine　had　made　a　great　success　at　the　time；　at　least　had　been　chattered　about　in　the　penny　newspapers；　which　is　the　nineteenth…century　standard　of　immortality。　suddenly　i　found　myself　face　to　face　with　the　young　man　whose　personality　had　so　strangely　stirred　me。　we　were　quite　close；　almost　touching。　our　eyes　met　again。　it　was　reckless　of　me；　but　i　asked　lady　brandon　to　introduce　me　to　him。　perhaps　it　was　not　so　reckless；　after　all。　it　was　simply　inevitable。　we　would　have　spoken　to　each　other　without　any　introduction。　i　am　sure　of　that。　dorian　told　me　so　afterwards。　he；　too；　felt　that　we　were　destined　to　know　each　other。〃

〃and　how　did　lady　brandon　describe　this　wonderful　young　man？〃　asked　his　panion。　〃i　know　she　goes　in　for　giving　a　rapid　precis　of　all　her　guests。　i　remember　her　bringing　me　up　to　a　truculent　and　red…faced　old　gentleman　covered　all　over　with　orders　and　ribbons；　and　hissing　into　my　ear；　in　a　tragic　whisper　which　must　have　been　perfectly　audible　to　everybody　in　the　room；　the　most　astounding　details。　i　simply　fled。　i　like　to　find　out　people　for　myself。　but　lady　brandon　treats　her　guests　exactly　as　an　auctioneer　treats　his　goods。　she　either　explains　them　entirely　away；　or　tells　one　everything　about　them　except　what　one　wants　to　know。〃

〃poor　lady　brandon！　you　are　hard　on　her；　harry！〃　said　hallward　listlessly。

〃my　dear　fellow；　she　tried　to　found　a　salon；　and　only　succeeded　in　opening　a　restaurant。　how　could　i　admire　her？　but　tell　me；　what　did　she　say　about　mr。　dorian　gray？〃

〃oh；　something　like；　charming　boypoor　dear　mother　and　i　absolutely　inseparable。　quite　forget　what　he　doesafraid　he　doesnt　do　anythingoh；　yes；　plays　the　pianoor　is　it　the　violin；　dear　mr。　gray？　neither　of　us　could　help　laughing；　and　we　became　friends　at　once。〃

〃laughter　is　not　at　all　a　bad　beginning　for　a　friendship；　and　it　is　far　the　best　ending　for　one；〃　said　the　young　lord；　plucking　another　daisy。

hallward　shook　his　head。　〃you　dont　understand　what　friendship　is；　harry；〃　he　murmured〃or　what　enmity　is；　for　that　matter。　you　like　every　one；　that　is　to　say；　you　are　indifferent　to　every　one。〃

〃how　horribly　unjust　of　you！〃　cried　lord　henry；　tilting　his　hat　back　and　looking　up　at　the　little　clouds　that；　like　ravelled　skeins　of　glossy　white　silk；　were　drifting　across　the　hollowed　turquoise　of　the　summer　sky。　〃yes；　horribly　unjust　of　you。　i　make　a　great　difference　between　people。　i　choose　my　friends　for　their　good　looks；　my　acquaintances　for　their　good　characters；　and　my　enemies　for　their　good　intellects。　a　man　cannot　be　too　careful　in　the　choice　of　his　enemies。　i　have　not　got　one　who　is　a　fool。　they　are　all　men　of　some　intellectual　power；　and　consequently　they　all　appreciate　me。　is　that　very　vain　of　me？　i　think　it　is　rather　vain。〃

〃i　should　think　it　was；　harry。　but　according　to　your　category　i　must　be　merely　an　acquaintance。〃

〃my　dear　old　basil；　you　are　much　more　than　an　acquaintance。〃

〃and　much　less　than　a　friend。　a　sort　of　brother；　i　suppose？〃

〃oh；　brothers！　i　dont　care　for　brothers。　my　elder　brother　wont　die；　and　my　younger　brothers　seem　never　to　do　anything　else。〃

〃harry！〃　exclaimed　hallward；　frowning。

〃my　dear　fellow；　i　am　not　quite　serious。　but　i　cant　help　detesting　my　relations。　i　suppose　it　es　from　the　fact　that　none　of　us　can　stand　other　people　having　the　same　faults　as　ourselves。　i　quite　sympathize　with　the　rage　of　the　english　democracy　against　what　they　call　the　vices　of　the　upper　orders。　the　masses　feel　that　drunkenness；　stupidity；　and　immorality　should　be　their　own　special　property；　and　that　if　any　one　of　us　makes　an　ass　of　himself；　he　is　poaching　on　their　preserves。　when　poor　southwark　got　into　the　divorce　court；　their　indignation　was　quite　magnificent。　and　yet　i　dont　suppose　that　ten　per　cent　of　the　proletariat　live　correctly。〃

〃i　dont　agree　with　a　single　word　that　you　have　said；　and；　what　is　more；　harry；　i　feel　sure　you　dont　either。〃

lord　henry　stroked　his　pointed　brown　beard　and　tapped　the　toe　of　his　patent…leather　boot　with　a　tasselled　ebony　cane。　〃how　english　you　are　basil！　that　is　the　second　time　you　have　made　that　observation。　if　one　puts　forward　an　idea　to　a　true　englishmanalways　a　rash　thing　to　dohe　never　dreams　of　considering　whether　the　idea　is　right　or　wrong。　the　only　thing　he　considers　of　any　importance　is　whether　one　believes　it　oneself。　now；　the　value　of　an　idea　has　nothing　whatsoever　to　do　with　the　sincerity　of　the　man　who　expresses　it。　indeed；　the　probabilities　are　that　the　more　insincere　the　man　is；　the　more　purely　intellectual　will　the　idea　be；　as　in　that　case　it　will　not　be　coloured　by　either　his　wants；　his　desires；　or　his　prejudices。　however；　i　dont　propose　to　discuss　politics；　sociology；　or　metaphysics　with　you。　i　like　persons　better　than　principles；　and　i　like　persons　with　no　principles　better　than　anything　else　in　the　world。　tell　me　more　about　mr。　dorian　gray。　how　often　do　you　see　him？〃

〃every　day。　i　couldnt　be　happy　if　i　didnt　see　him　every　day。　he　is　absolutely　necessary　to　me。〃

〃how　extraordinary！　i　thought　you　would　never　care　for　anything　but　your　art。〃

〃he　is　all　my　art　to　me　now；〃　said　the　painter　gravely。　〃i　sometimes　think；　harry；　that　there　are　only　two　eras　of　any　importance　in　the　worlds　history。　the　first　is　the　appearance　of　a　new　medium　for　art；　and　the　second　is　the　appearance　of　a　new　personality　for　art　also。　what　the　invention　of　oil…painting　was　to　the　venetians；　the　face　of　antinous　was　to　late　greek　sculpture；　and　the　face　of　dorian　gray　will　some　day　be　to　me。　it　is　not　merely　that　i　paint　from　him；　draw　from　him；　sketch　from　him。　of　course；　i　have　done　all　that。　but　he　is　much　more　to　me　than　a　model　or　a　sitter。　i　wont　tell　you　that　i　am　dissatisfied　with　what　i　have　done　of　him；　or　that　his　beauty　is　such　that　art　cannot　express　it。　there　is　nothing　that　art　cannot　express；　and　i　know　that　the　work　i　have　done；　since　i　met　dorian　gray；　is　good　work；　is　the　best　work　of　my　life。　but　in　some　curious　wayi　wonder　will　you　understand　me？his　personality　has　suggested　to　me　an　entirely　new　manner　in　art；　an　entirely　new　mode　of　style。　i　see　things　differently；　i　think　of　them　differently。　i　can　now　recreate　life　in　a　way　that　was　hidden　from　me　before。　a　dream　of　form　in　days　of　thoughtwho　is　it　who　says　that？　i　forget；　but　it　is　what　dorian　gray　has　been　to　me。　the　merely　visible　presence　of　this　ladfor　he　seems　to　me　little　more　than　a　lad；　though　he　is　really　over　twenty　his　merely　visible　presenceah！　i　wonder　can　you　realize　all　that　that　means？　unconsciously　he　defines　for　me　the　lines　of　a　fresh　school；　a　school　that　is　to　have　in　it　all　the　passion　of　the　romantic　spirit；　all　the　perfection　of　the　spirit　that　is　greek。　the　harmony　of　soul　and　body　how　much　that　is！　we　in　our　madness　have　separated　the　two；　and　have　invented　a　realism　that　is　vulgar；　an　ideality　that　is　void。　harry！　if　you　only　knew　what　dorian　gray　is　to　me！　you　remember　that　landscape　of　mine；　for　which　agnew　offered　me　such　a　huge　price　but　which　i　would　not　part　with？　it　is　one　of　the　best　things　i　have　ever　done。　and　why　is　it　so？　because；　while　i　was　painting　it；　dorian　gray　sat　beside　me。　some　subtle　influence　passed　from　him　to　me；　and　for　the　first　time　in　my　life　i　saw　in　the　plain　woodland　the　wonder　i　had　always　looked　for　and　always　missed。〃

〃basil；　this　is　extraordinary！　i　must　see　dorian　gray。〃

hallward　got　up　from　the　seat　and　walked　up　and　down　the　garden。　after　some　time　he　came　back。　〃harry；〃　he　said；　〃dorian　gray　is　to　me　simply　a　motive　in　art。　you　might　see　nothing　in　him。　i　see　everyth