adam bede(亚当[1].比德)-第124章
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should go mad with thinking of her looks and what she said to me；
and then； that I couldn’t get a full pardon—that I couldn’t save her
from that wretched fate of being transported—that I can do
nothing for her all those years； and she may die under it； and
never know comfort any more。”
“Ah； sir；” said Adam； for the first time feeling his own pain
merged in sympathy for Arthur； “you and me’ll often be thinking
o’ the same thing； when we’re a long way off one another。 I’ll pray
God to help you； as I pray him to help me。”
“But there’s that sweet woman—that Dinah Morris；” Arthur
said； pursuing his own thoughts and not knowing what had been
the sense of Adam’s words； “she says she shall stay with her to the
very last moment—till she goes； and the poor thing clings to her as
if she found some comfort in her。 I could worship that woman； I
don’t know what I should do if she were not there。 Adam； you will
see her when she comes back。 I could say nothing to her
yesterday—nothing of what I felt towards her。 Tell her；” Arthur
went on hurriedly； as if he wanted to hide the emotion with which
he spoke； while he took off his chain and watch； “tell her I asked
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you to give her this in remembrance of me—of the man to whom
she is the one source of comfort； when he thinks of 。 。 。 I know she
doesn’t care about such things—or anything else I can give her for
its own sake。 But she will use the watch—I shall like to think of
her using it。”
“I’ll give it to her； sir；” Adam said； “and tell her your words。 She
told me she should come back to the people at the Hall Farm。”
“And you will persuade the Poysers to stay； Adam？” said
Arthur； reminded of the subject which both of them had forgotten
in the first interchange of revived friendship。 “You will stay
yourself； and help Mr。 Irwine to carry out the repairs and
improvements on the estate？”
“There’s one thing； sir； that perhaps you don’t take account of；”
said Adam； with hesitating gentleness； “and that was what made
me hang back longer。 You see； it’s the same with both me and the
Poysers： if we stay； it’s for our own worldly interest； and it looks as
if we’d put up with anything for the sake o’ that。 I know that’s
what they’ll feel； and I can’t help feeling a little of it myself。 When
folks have got an honourable independent spirit； they don’t like to
do anything that might make ’em seem base…minded。”
“But no one who knows you will think that； Adam。 That is not a
reason strong enough against a course that is really more
generous； more unselfish than the other。 And it will be known—it
shall be made known； that both you and the Poysers stayed at my
entreaty。 Adam； don’t try to make things worse for me； I’m
punished enough without that。”
“No； sir； no；” Adam said； looking at Arthur with mournful
affection。 “God forbid I should make things worse for you。 I used
to wish I could do it； in my passion—but that was when I thought
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you didn’t feel enough。 I’ll stay； sir； I’ll do the best I can。 It’s all I’ve
got to think of now—to do my work well and make the world a bit
better place for them as can enjoy it。”
“Then we’ll part now； Adam。 You will see Mr。 Irwine to…
morrow； and consult with him about everything。”
“Are you going soon； sir？” said Adam。
“As soon as possible—after I’ve made the necessary
arrangements。 Good…bye； Adam。 I shall think of you going about
the old place。”
“Good…bye； sir。 God bless you。”
The hands were clasped once more； and Adam left the
Hermitage； feeling that sorrow was more bearable now hatred was
gone。
As soon as the door was closed behind him； Arthur went to the
waste…paper basket and took out the little pink silk handkerchief。
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Book Sixth
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Chapter XLIX
At the Hall Farm
he first autumnal afternoon sunshine of 1801—more than
eighteen months after that parting of Adam and Arthur in
T
the Hermitage—was on the yard at the Hall Farm； and the
bull…dog was in one of his most excited moments； for it was that
hour of the day when the cows were being driven into the yard for
their afternoon milking。 No wonder the patient beasts ran
confusedly into the wrong places； for the alarming din of the bull…
dog was mingled with more distant sounds which the timid
feminine creatures； with pardonable superstition； imagined also to
have some relation to their own movements—with the tremendous
crack of the waggoner’s whip； the roar of his voice； and the
booming thunder of the waggon； as it left the rick…yard empty of
its golden load。
The milking of the cows was a sight Mrs。 Poyser loved； and at
this hour on mild days she was usually standing at the house door；
with her knitting in her hands； in quiet contemplation； only
heightened to a keener interest when the vicious yellow cow； who
had once kicked over a pailful of precious milk； was about to
undergo the preventive punishment of having her hinder…legs
strapped。
To…day； however； Mrs。 Poyser gave but a divided attention to
the arrival of the cows； for she was in eager discussion with Dinah；
who was stitching Mr。 Poyser’s shirt…collars； and had borne
patiently to have her thread broken three times by Totty pulling at
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her arm with a sudden insistence that she should look at “Baby；”
that is； at a large wooden doll with no legs and a long skirt； whose
bald head Totty； seated in her small chair at Dinah’s side； was
caressing and pressing to her fat cheek with much fervour。 Totty is
larger by more than two years’ growth than when you first saw
her； and she has on a black frock under her pinafore。 Mrs。 Poyser
too has on a black gown； which seems to heighten the family
likeness between her and Dinah。 In other respects there is little
outward change now discernible in our old friends； or in the
pleasant house…place； bright with polished oak and pewter。
“I never saw the like to you； Dinah；” Mrs。 Poyser was saying；
“when you’ve once took anything into your head： there’s no more
moving you than the rooted tree。 You may say what you like； but I
don’t believe that’s religion； for what’s the Sermon on the Mount
about； as you’re so fond o’ reading to the boys； but doing what
other folks ’ud have you do？ But if it was anything unreasonable
they wanted you to do； like taking your cloak off and giving it to
’em； or letting ’em slap you i’ the face； I daresay you’d be ready
enough。 It’s only when one ’ud have you do what’s plain common
sense and good for yourself； as you’re obstinate th’ other way。”
“Nay； dear Aunt；” said Dinah； smiling slightly as she went on
with her work； “I’m sure your wish ’ud be a reason for me to do
anything that I didn’t feel it was wrong to do。”
“Wrong！ You drive me past bearing。 What is there wrong； I
should like to know； i’ staying along wi’ your own friends； as are
th’ happier for having you with ’em an’ are willing to provide for
you； even if your work didn’t more nor pay ’em for the bit o’
sparrow’s victual y’ eat and the bit o’ rag you put on？ An’ who is it；
I should like to know； as you’re bound t’ help and comfort i’ the
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world more nor your own flesh and blood—an’ me th’ only aunt
you’ve got above…ground； an’ am brought to the brink o’ the grave
welly every winter as comes； an’ there’s the child as sits beside you
’ull break her little heart when you go； an’ the grandfather not
been dead a twelvemonth； an’ your uncle ’ull miss you so as never
was—a…lighting his pipe an’ waiting on him； an’ now I can trust
you wi’ the butter； an’ have had all the trouble o’ teaching you； and
there’s all the sewing to be done； an’ I must have a strange gell out
o’ Treddles’on to do it—an’ all because you must go back to that
bare heap o’ stones as the very crows fly over an’ won’t stop at。”
“Dear Aunt Rachel；” said Dinah； looking up in Mrs。 Poyser’s
face； “it’s your kindness makes you say I’m useful to you。 You
don’t really want me now； for Nancy and Molly are clever at their
work； and you’re in good health now； by the blessing of God； and
my uncle is of a cheerful countenance again； and you have
neighbours and friends not a few—some of them come to sit with
my uncle almost daily。 Indeed； you will not miss me； and at
Snowfield there are brethren and sisters in great need； who have
none of those comforts you have around you。 I feel that I am called
