adam bede(亚当[1].比德)-第129章
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slept in the cottage since that night after Thias’s death； when； you
remember； Lisbeth praised her deft movements and even gave a
modified approval to her porridge。 But in that long interval Dinah
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had made great advances in household cleverness； and this
morning； since Seth was there to help； she was bent on bringing
everything to a pitch of cleanliness and order that would have
satisfied her Aunt Poyser。 The cottage was far from that standard
at present； for Lisbeth’s rheumatism had forced her to give up her
old habits of dilettante scouring and polishing。 When the kitchen
was to her mind； Dinah went into the new room； where Adam had
been writing the night before； to see what sweeping and dusting
were needed there。 She opened the window and let in the fresh
morning air； and the smell of the sweet…brier； and the bright low…
slanting rays of the early sun； which made a glory about her pale
face and pale auburn hair as she held the long brush； and swept；
singing to herself in a very low tone—like a sweet summer
murmur that you have to listen for very closely—one of Charles
Wesley’s hymns：
“Eternal Beam of Light Divine；
Fountain of unexhausted love；
In whom the Father’s glories shine；
Through earth beneath and heaven above；
Jesus！ the weary wanderer’s rest；
Give me thy easy yoke to bear；
With steadfast patience arm my breast；
With spotless love and holy fear。
Speak to my warring passions； “Peace！”
Say to my trembling heart； “Be still！”
Thy power my strength and fortress is；
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For all things serve thy sovereign will。
She laid by the brush and took up the duster； and if you had
ever lived in Mrs。 Poyser’s household； you would know how the
duster behaved in Dinah’s hand—how it went into every small
corner； and on every ledge in and out of sight—how it went again
and again round every bar of the chairs； and every leg； and under
and over everything that lay on the table； till it came to Adam’s
papers and rulers and the open desk near them。 Dinah dusted up
to the very edge of these and then hesitated； looking at them with
a longing but timid eye。 It was painful to see how much dust there
was among them。 As she was looking in this way； she heard Seth’s
step just outside the open door； towards which her back was
turned； and said； raising her clear treble；
“Seth； is your brother wrathful when his papers are stirred？”
“Yes； very； when they are not put back in the right places；” said
a deep strong voice； not Seth’s。
It was as if Dinah had put her hands unawares on a vibrating
chord。 She was shaken with an intense thrill； and for the instant
felt nothing else； then she knew her cheeks were glowing； and
dared not look round； but stood still； distressed because she could
not say good…morning in a friendly way。 Adam； finding that she
did not look round so as to see the smile on his face； was afraid she
had thought him serious about his wrathfulness； and went up to
her； so that she was obliged to look at him。
“What！ You think I’m a cross fellow at home； Dinah？” he said；
smilingly。
“Nay；” said Dinah； looking up with timid eyes； “not so。 But you
might be put about by finding things meddled with； and even the
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man Moses； the meekest of men； was wrathful sometimes。”
“Come； then；” said Adam； looking at her affectionately； “I’ll
help you move the things； and put ’em back again； and then they
can’t get wrong。 You’re getting to be your aunt’s own niece； I see；
for particularness。”
They began their little task together； but Dinah had not
recovered herself sufficiently to think of any remark； and Adam
looked at her uneasily。 Dinah； he thought； had seemed to
disapprove him somehow lately； she had not been so kind and
open to him as she used to be。 He wanted her to look at him； and
be as pleased as he was himself with doing this bit of playful work。
But Dinah did not look at him—it was easy for her to avoid looking
at the tall man—and when at last there was no more dusting to be
done and no further excuse for him to linger near her； he could
bear it no longer； and said； in rather a pleading tone； “Dinah；
you’re not displeased with me for anything； are you？ I’ve not said
or done anything to make you think ill of me？”
The question surprised her； and relieved her by giving a new
course to her feeling。 She looked up at him now； quite earnestly；
almost with the tears coming； and said； “Oh； no； Adam！ how could
you think so？”
“I couldn’t bear you not to feel as much a friend to me as I do to
you；” said Adam。 “And you don’t know the value I set on the very
thought of you； Dinah。 That was what I meant yesterday； when I
said I’d be content for you to go； if you thought right。 I meant； the
thought of you was worth so much to me； I should feel I ought to
be thankful； and not grumble； if you see right to go away。 You
know I do mind parting with you； Dinah？”
“Yes； dear friend；” said Dinah； trembling； but trying to speak
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calmly； “I know you have a brother’s heart towards me； and we
shall often be with one another in spirit； but at this season I am in
heaviness through manifold temptations。 You must not mark me。 I
feel called to leave my kindred for a while； but it is a trial—the
flesh is weak。”
Adam saw that it pained her to be obliged to answer。
“I hurt you by talking about it； Dinah；” he said。 “I’ll say no
more。 Let’s see if Seth’s ready with breakfast now。”
That is a simple scene； reader。 But it is almost certain that you；
too； have been in love—perhaps； even； more than once； though
you may not choose to say so to all your feminine friends。 If so； you
will no more think the slight words； the timid looks； the tremulous
touches； by which two human souls approach each other
gradually； like two little quivering rain…streams； before they
mingle into one—you will no more think these things trivial than
you will think the first…detected signs of coming spring trivial；
though they be but a faint indescribable something in the air and
in the song of the birds； and the tiniest perceptible budding on the
hedge…row branches。 Those slight words and looks and touches
are part of the soul’s language； and the finest language； I believe；
is chiefly made up of unimposing words； such as “light；” “sound；”
“stars；” “music”—words really not worth looking at； or hearing； in
themselves； any more than “chips” or “sawdust。” It is only that
they happen to be the signs of something unspeakably great and
beautiful。 I am of opinion that love is a great and beautiful thing
too； and if you agree with me； the smallest signs of it will not be
chips and sawdust to you： they will rather be like those little
words； “light” and “music；” stirring the long…winding fibres of
your memory and enriching your present with your most precious
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past。
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Chapter LI
Sunday Morning
isbeth’s touch of rheumatism could not be made to appear
Lserious enough to detain Dinah another night from the
Hall Farm； now she had made up her mind to leave her
aunt so soon； and at evening the friends must part。 “For a long
while；” Dinah had said； for she had told Lisbeth of her resolve。
“Then it’ll be for all my life； an’ I shall ne’er see thee again；”
said Lisbeth。 “Long while！ I’n got no long while t’ live。 An’ I shall
be took bad an’ die； an’ thee canst ne’er come a…nigh me； an’ I shall
die a…longing for thee。”
That had been the key…note of her wailing talk all day； for Adam
was not in the house； and so she put no restraint on her
complaining。 She had tried poor Dinah by returning again and
again to the question； why she must go away； and refusing to
accept reasons； which seemed to her nothing but whim and
“contrairiness”； and still more； by regretting that she “couldna’ ha’
one o’ the lads” and be her daughter。
“Thee couldstna put up wi’ Seth；” she said。 “He isna cliver
enough for thee； happen； but he’d ha’ been very good t’ thee—he’s
as handy as can be at doin’ things for me when I’m bad； an’ he’s as
fond o’ the Bible an’ chappellin’ as thee art thysen。 But happen；
thee’dst like a husband better as isna just the cut o’ thysen： the
runnin’ brook isna athirst fo
