the daisy chain, or aspirations-第117章

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not　think　it　fine　in　me。〃

Ethel　privately　thought　that　no　power　on　earth　could　prevent　him　from
doing　that。

It　was　not　consistent　with　cautious　sounding；　that　Norman　was　always
looking　appealingly　towards　her；　and；　indeed；　she　could　not　wait　long
with　such　a　question　on　her　mind。　　She　remained　with　her　father　in
the　drawing…room；　when　the　rest　were　gone　upstairs；　and；　plunging　at
once　into　the　matter；　she　said；　〃Papa；　there　is　something　that　Norman
cannot　bear　to　say　to　you　himself。〃

〃Humming…birds　to　wit？〃　said　Dr。　May。

〃No；　indeed；　but　he　wants　to　be　doing　something　at　once。　　What　should
you　think　ofofthere　are　two　things；　one　isgoing　out　as　a
missionary〃

〃Humming…birds　in　another　shape；〃　said　the　doctor；　startled；　but
smiling；　so　as　to　pique　her。

〃You　mean　to　treat　it　as　a　boy's　fancy！〃　said　she。

〃It　is　rather　suspicious；〃　he　said。　　〃Well；　what　is　the　other　of　his
two　things？〃

〃The　other　is；　to　begin　studying　medicine　at　once；　so　as　to　help
you。〃

〃Heyday！〃　cried　Dr。　May；　drawing　up　his　tall　vigorous　figure；　〃does
he　think　me　so　very　ancient　and　superannuated？〃

What　could　possess　him　to　be　so　provoking　and　unsentimental　to…night？
Was　it　her　own　bad　management？　　She　longed　to　put　an　end　to　the
conversation；　and　answered；　〃No；　but　he　thinks　it　hard　that　none　of
your　sons　should　be　willing　to　relieve　you。〃

〃It　won't　be　Norman；〃　said　Dr。　May。　　〃He　is　not　made　of　the　stuff。
If　he　survived　the　course　of　study；　every　patient　he　lost；　he　would
bring　himself　in　guilty　of　murder；　and　there　would　soon　be　an　end　of
him！〃

〃He　says　that　a　man　can　force　himself　to　anything　that　is　his　duty。〃

〃This　is　not　going　to　be　his　duty；　if　I　can　make　it　otherwise。　　What
is　the　meaning　of　all　this？　　No；　I　need　not　ask；　poor　boy；　it　is　what
I　was　afraid　of！〃

〃It　is　far　deeper；〃　said　Ethel；　and　she　related　great　part　of　what
she　had　heard　in　the　afternoon。　　It　was　not　easy　to　make　her　father
listenhis　line　was　to　be　positively　indignant；　rather　than
compassionate；　when　he　heard　of　the　doubts　that　had　assailed　poor
Norman。　　〃Foolish　boy；　what　business　had　he　to　meddle　with　those
accursed　books；　when　he　knew　what　they　were　made　ofit　was　tasting
poison；　it　was　running　into　temptation！　　He　had　no　right　to　expect　to
come　out　safe〃　and　then　he　grasped　tightly　hold　of　Ethel's　hands；
and；　as　if　the　terror　had　suddenly　flashed　on　him；　asked　her；　with
dilated　eye　and　trembling　voice；　whether　she　were　sure　that　he　was
safe；　and　held　the　faith。

Ethel　repeated　his　asseveration；　and　her　father　covered　his　face　with
his　hands　in　thanksgiving。

After　this；　he　seemed　somewhat　inclined　to　hold　poor　Oxford　in
horror；　only；　as　he　observed；　it　would　be　going　out　of　the　frying…pan
into　the　fire；　to　take　refuge　at　Parisa　recurrence　to　the　notion　of
Norman's　medical　studies；　that　showed　him　rather　enticed　by　the
proposal。

He　sent　Ethel　to　bed；　saying　he　should　talk　to　Norman　and　find　out
what　was　the　meaning　of　it；　and　she　walked　upstairs；　much　ashamed　of
having　so　ill　served　her　brother；　as　almost　to　have　made　him
ridiculous。

Dr　May　and　Norman　never　failed　to　come　to　an　understanding；　and　after
they　had　had　a　long　drive　into　the　country　together；　Dr　May　told
Ethel　that　he　was　afraid；　of　what　he　ought　not　to　be　afraid　of；　that
she　was　right；　that　the　lad　was　very　much　in　earnest　now　at　any　rate；
and　if　he　should　continue　in　the　same　mind；　he　hoped　he　should　not　be
so　weak　as　to　hold　him　from　a　blessed　work。

From　Norman；　Ethel　heard　the　warmest　gratitude　for　his　father's
kindness。　　Nothing　could　be　done　yet；　he　must　wait　patiently　for　the
present；　but　he　was　to　write　to　his　uncle；　Mr。　Arnott；　in　New
Zealand；　and；　without　pledging　himself；　to　make　inquiries　as　to　the
mission；　and　in　the　meantime；　return　to　Oxford；　where；　to　his　other
studies；　he　was　to　add　a　course　of　medical　lectures；　which；　as　Dr。
May　said；　would　do　him　no　harm；　would　occupy　his　mind；　and　might　turn
to　use　wherever　he
was。

Ethel　was　surprised　to　find　that　Norman　wrote　to　Flora　an　expression
of　his　resolution；　that；　if　he　found　he　could　be　spared　from
assisting　his　father　as　a　physician；　he　would　give　himself　up　to　the
mission　in　New　Zealand。　　Why　should　he　tell　any　one　so　unsympathetic
as　Flora；　who　would　think　him　wasted　in　either　case？




CHAPTER　XVII。



Do　not　fear：　Heaven　is　as　near；
By　water；　as　by　land。LONGFELLOW。


The　fifth　of　May　was　poor　Harry's　eighteenth　birthday；　and；　as　usual；
was　a　holiday。　　Etheldred　privately　thought　his　memory　more　likely　to
be　respected；　if　Blanche　and　Aubrey　were　employed；　than　if　they　were
left　in　idleness；　but　Mary　would　have　been　wretched　had　the
celebration　been　omitted；　and　a　leisure　day　was　never　unwelcome。

Dr。　Spencer　carried　off　Blanche　and　Aubrey　for　a　walk；　and　Ethel
found　Mary　at　her　great　resortHarry's　cupboarddusting　and
arranging　his　books；　and　the　array　of　birthday　gifts；　to　which；　even
to…day；　she　had　not　failed　to　add　the　marker　that　had　been　in　hand　at
Christmas。　　Ethel　entreated　her　to　come　down；　and　Mary　promised；　and
presently　appeared；　looking　so　melancholy；　that；　as　a　sedative；　Ethel
set　her　down　to　the　basket　of　scraps　to　find　materials　for　a　tippet
for　some　one　at　Cocksmoor；　intending；　as　soon　as　Margaret　should　be
dressed；　to　resign　her　morning　to　the　others；　invite　Miss　Bracy　to
the　drawing…room；　and　read　aloud。

Gertrude　was　waiting　for　her　walk；　till　nurse　should　have　dressed
Margaret；　and　was　frisking　about　the　lawn；　sometimes　looking　in　at
the　drawing…room　window　at　her　sisters；　sometimes　chattering　to　Adams
at　his　work；　or　laughing　to　herself　and　the　flowers；　in　that　overflow
of　mirth；　that　seemed　always　bubbling　up　within　her。

She　was　standing　in　rapt　contemplation　of　a　pear…tree　in　full
blossom；　her　hands　tightly　clasped　behind　the　back；　for　greater
safety　from　the　temptation；　when；　hearing　the　shrubbery　gate　open；
she　turned；　expecting　to　see　her　papa；　but　was　frightened　at　the
sight　of　two　strangers；　and　began　to　run　off　at　full　speed。

〃Stop！　　Blanche！　　Blanche；　don't　you　know　me？〃　　The　voice　was　that
tone　of　her　brother's；　and　she　stood　and　looked；　but　it　came　from　a
tall；　ruddy　youth；　in　a　shabby　rough　blue　coat；　followed　by　a
grizzled　old　seaman。　　She　was　too　much　terrified　and　perplexed　even
to　run。

〃What's　the　matter！　　Blanche；　it　is　I！　　Why；　don't　you　know　me
Harry？〃

〃Poor　brother　Harry　is　drowned；〃　she　answered；　and；　with　one　bound；
he　was　beside　her；　and；　snatching　her　up；　devoured　her　with　kisses。

〃Put　me　downput　me　down；　please；〃　was　all　she　could　say。

〃It　is　not　Blanche！　　What？　the　little　Daisy；　I　do　believe！〃

〃Yes；　I　am　Gertrude；　but　please　let　me　go；〃　and；　at　the　same　time；
Adams　hurried　up；　as　if　he　thought　her　being　kidnapped；　but　his
aspect　changed　at　the　glad　cry；　〃Ha！　Adams'　how　are　you？　　Are　they
all　well？〃

〃'Tisn't　never　Master　Harry！　　Bless　me！〃　as　Harry's　hand　gave　him
sensible　proof；　〃when　we　had　given　you　up　for　lost！〃

〃My　father　well？〃　Harry　asked；　hurrying　the　words　one　over　the　other。

〃Quite　well；　sir；　but　he　never　held　up　his　head　since　he　heard　it；
and　poor　Miss　Mary　has　so　moped　about。　　If　ever　I　thought　to　see　the
like〃

〃So　they　did　not　get　my　letter；　but　I　can't　stop。　　Jennings　will　tell
you。　　Take　care　of　him。　　Come；　Daisy〃　for　he　had　kept　her　unwilling
hand　all　the　time。　　〃But　what's　that　for？〃　pointing　to　the　black
ribbons；　and；　stopping　short；　startled。

〃Because　of　poor　Harry；〃　said　the　bewildered　child。

〃Oh；　that's　right！〃　cried　he；　striding　on；　and　dragging　her　in　a
breathless　run；　as　he　threw　open　the　well…known　doors；　and；　she
escaping　from　him；　hid　her　face　in　Mary's　lap；　screaming；　〃He　says　he
is　Harry！　he　says　he　is　not　drowned！〃

At　the　same　moment　Ethel　was　in　his　arms；　and　his　voice　was　sobbing；
〃Ethel！　　Mary！　home！　　Where's　papa？〃　　One　moment's　almost　agonising
joy　in　the　certainty　of　his　identity！　but　ere　she　could　look　or
think；　he　was　crying；　〃Mary！　oh；　Ethel；　see〃

Mary　had　not　moved；　but　sat　as　if　turned　to　stone；　with　breath
suspended；　wide…stretched　eyes；　and　death…like　cheeksEthel　sprang
to　her；　〃Mary；　Mary　dear；　it　is　Harry！　　It　is　himself！　　Don't　you
see？　　Speak　to　her；　Harry。〃

He　seemed　almost　afraid　to　do　so；　but；　recovering　himself；　exclaimed；
〃Mary；　dear　old　Polly；　here　I　am！　　Oh；　won't　you　speak　to　me？〃　he
added　piteously；　as　he　threw　his　arm　round　her　and　kissed　her；
startled　at　the　cold　touch　of　her　cheek。

The　spell　seemed　broken；　and；　with　a　wild　hoarse　shriek　that　rang
through　the　house；　she　struggled　to　regain　her　breath；　but　it　would
only　come　in　painful；　audible　catches；　as　she　held　Harry's　hand
convulsively。

〃What　have　I　done？〃　he　exclaimed；　in　distress。

〃What's　this！　　Who　is　this　frightening　my　dear？〃　was　old　nurse's
exclamation；　as　she　and　James　came　at　the　outcry。

〃Oh；　nurse；　what　have　I　done　to　her？〃　repeated　Harry。

〃It　is　joyit　is　sudden　joy！〃　said　Ethel。　　〃See；　she　is　better
now〃

〃Master　Harry！　　Well；　I　never！〃　and　James；　〃with　one　wring　of　the
hand；　retreated；　while　old　nurse　was　nearly　hugged　to　death；
declaring　all　the　time　that　he　didn't　ought　to　have　come　in　such　a
way；　terrifying　every　one　out　of　their　senses！　and　as　for　poor　Miss
May

〃Where　is　she？　〃　cried　Harry；　starting　at　the　sight　of　the　vacant
sofa。

〃Only　upstairs；〃　said　Ethel；　〃but　where's　Alan？　　Is　not　he　come？〃

〃Oh；　Ethel；　don't　you　know？〃　His　face　told　but　too　plainly。

〃Nurse！　nurse；　how　shall　we　tell　her？〃　said　Ethel。

〃Poor　dear！〃　exclaimed　nurse；　sounding　her　tongue　on　the　roof　of　her
mouth。　　〃She'll　never　abear　it　without　her　papa。　　Wait　for　him；　I
should　say。　　But　bless　me；　Miss　Mary；　to　see　you　go　on　like　that；
when　Master　Harry　is　come　back　such　a　bonny
man！〃

〃I'm　better　now；〃　said　Mary；　with　an　effort。　　〃Oh；　Harry！　speak　to　me
again。〃

〃But　Margaret！〃　said　Ethel；　while　the　brother　was　holding　Mary　in　his
embrace；　and　she　lay　tremulous　with　the　new　ecstasy　upon　his　breast
〃but　Margaret。　　Nurse；　you　must　go　up；　or　she　will　suspect。　　I'll
come　when　I　can；　speak　quietly。　　Oh！　poor　Margaret！　　If　Richard　would
but　come　in！〃

Ethel　walked　up　and　down　the　room；　divided　between　a　tumult　of　joy；
grief；　dread；　and　perplexity。　　At　that　moment　a　little　voice　said　at
the　door；　〃Please；　Margaret　wants　Harry　to　come　up　directly。〃

They　looked　one　upon　another　in　consternation。　They　had　never　thought
of　the　child；　who；　of　course；　had　flown　up　at　once　with　the　tidings。

〃Go　up；　Miss　Ethel；〃　said　nurse。

〃Oh！　nurse；　I　can't　be　the　first。　　Come；　Harry；　come。〃

Hand…in…hand；　they　silently　ascended　the　stairs；　and　Ethel　pushed
open　the　door。　　Margaret　was　on　her　couch；　her　whole　form　and　face　in
one　throb　of　expectation。

She　looked　into　Harry's　facethe　eagerness　flitted　like　sunshine　on
the　hillside；　before　a　cloud；　and；　without　a　word；　she　held　out　her
arms。

He　threw　himself　on　his　knees；　and　her　fingers　were　clasped　among　his
thick　curls；　while　his　frame　heaved　with　suppressed　sobs；　〃Oh；　if　he
could　only　have　come　back　to　you。〃

〃Thank　God；〃　she　said；　then　slightly　pushing　him　back；　she　lay
holding　his　hand　in　one　of　hers；　and　resting　the　other　on　his
shoulder；　and　gazing　in　silence　into　his　face。　　Each　was　stillshe
was　g