the daisy chain, or aspirations-第135章

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girls　would　do；　if　they　might；　or　could；　that　I　long　to　see　them　like
Etheldo　what　they　can。　　And　then　it　strikes　me　that　I　am　doing　the
same；　living　wilfully　in　indulgence；　and　putting　my　trust　in　my　own
misgivings　and　discontent。〃

〃I　should　have　thought　that　discontent　had　as　little　to　do　with　you
as　with　any　living　creature。〃

〃You　don't　know　how　I　could　growl！〃　said　Meta；　laughing。　　〃Though
less　from　having　anything　to　complain　of；　than　from　having　nothing　to
complain　of。〃

〃You　mean；〃　he　said；　pausing；　with　a　seriousness　and　hesitation　that
startled　her〃do　you　mean　that　this　is　not　the　course　of　life　that
you　would　choose？〃

A　sort　of　bashfulness　made　her　put　her　answer　playfully


　　　　　　　　　　〃All　play　and　no　work　makes　Jack　a　mere　toy。


〃Toys　have　a　kindly　mission；　and　I　may　be　good　for　nothing　else；　but
I　would　have　rather　been　a　coffee…pot　than　a　china　shepherdess。〃

The　gaiety　disconcerted　him；　and　he　seemed　to　try　to　be　silent；　or　to
reply　in　the　same　tone；　but　he　could　not　help　returning　to　the
subject。　　〃Then　you　find　no　charm　in　the　refinements　to　which　you
have　been　brought　up？〃

〃Only　too　much；〃　said　Meta。

He　was　silent；　and　fearing　to　have　added　to　his　fine…lady　impression；
she　resumed。　　〃I　mean　that　I　never　could　dislike　anything；　and
kindness　gives　these　things　a　soul；　but；　of　course；　I　should　be
better　satisfied；　if　I　lived　harder；　and　had　work　to　do。〃

〃Meta！〃　he　exclaimed；　〃you　tempt　me　very　much！　　Would　you？　No；　it
is　too　unreasonable。　　Would　you　shareshare　the　work　that　I　have
undertaken？〃

He　turned　aside　and　leaned　against　a　tree；　as　if　not　daring　to　watch
the　effect　of　the　agitated　words　that　had　broken　from　him。　　She　had
little　imagined　whither　his　last　sayings　had　been　tending；　and　stood
still；　breathless　with　the　surprise。

〃Forgive　me；〃　he　said　hastily。　　〃It　was　very　wrong。　　I　never　meant　to
have　vexed　you　by　the　betrayal　of　my　vain　affection。〃

He　seemed　to　be　going；　and　this　roused　her。　　〃Stay；　Norman；〃
exclaimed　she。　　〃Why　should　it　vex　me？　　I　should　like　it　very　much
indeed。〃

He　faced　suddenly　towards　her　〃Meta；　Meta！　is　it　possible？　　Do　you
know　what　you　are　saying？〃

〃I　think　I　do。〃

〃You　must　understand　me；〃　said　Norman；　striving　to　speak　calmly。　〃You
have　beenwords　will　not　express　what　you　have　been　to　me　for　years
past；　but　I　thought　you　too　far　beyond　my　hopes。　　I　knew　I　ought　to
be　removed　from　youI　believed　that　those　who　are　debarred　from
earthly　happiness　are　marked　for　especial　tasks。　　I　never　intended
you　to　know　what　actuated　me；　and　now　the　work　is　undertaken；　and
and　I　cannot　turn　back；〃　he　added　quickly；　as　if　fearing　himself。

〃No　indeed；〃　was　her　steady　reply。

〃Then　I　may　believe　it！〃　cried　Norman。　　〃You　doyou　willyou
deliberately　choose　to　share　it　with　me？〃

〃I　will　try　not　to　be　a　weight　on　you；〃　answered　the　young　girl；　with
a　sweet　mixture　of　resolution　and　humility。　　〃It　would　be　the
greatest　possible　privilege。　　I　really　do　not　think　I　am　a　fine　lady
ingrain；　and　you　will　teach　me　not　to　be　too　unworthy。〃

〃I？　　Oh；　Meta；　you　know　not　what　I　am！　　Yet　with　you；　with　you　to
inspire；　to　strengthen；　to　cheerMeta；　Meta；　life　is　so　much　changed
before　me；　that　I　cannot　understand　it　yetafter　the　long　dreary
hopelessness〃

〃I　can't　think　why〃　Meta　had　half　said；　when　feminine　dignity
checked　the　words；　consciousness　and　confusion　suddenly　assailed　her；
dyed　her　cheeks　crimson；　and　stifled　her　voice。

It　was　the　same　with　Norman；　and　bashfulness　making　a　sudden　prey　of
bothon　they　went　under　its　dominion；　in　a　condition　partaking
equally　of　discomfort　and　felicity；　dreading　the　sound　of　their　own
voices；　afraid　of　each　other's　faces；　feeling　they　were　treating　each
other　very　strangely　and　ungratefully；　yet　without　an　idea　what　to
say　next；　or　the　power　of　speaking　first；　and　therefore　pacing
onwards；　looking　gravely　straight　along　the　path；　as　if　to　prevent
the　rabbits　and　foxgloves　from　guessing　that　anything　had　been
passing　between　them。

Dr。　May　had　made　his　call　at　Drydale；　and　was　driving　up　a　rough
lane；　between　furzy　banks；　leading　to　Cocksmoor；　when　he　was　aware　of
a　tall　gentleman　on　one　side　of　the　road　and　a　little　lady　on　the
other；　with　the　whole　space　of　the　cart…track　between　them；　advancing
soberly　towards　him。

〃Hallo！　　Why；　Meta！　　Norman！　what　brings　you　here？　　Where　are　you
going？〃

Norman　perceived　that　he　had　turned　to　the　left　instead　of　to　the
right；　and　was　covered　with　shame。

〃That　is　all　your　wits　are　good　for。　　It　is　well　I　met　you；　or　you
would　have　led　poor　Meta　a　pretty　dance！　　You　will　know　better　than
to　trust　yourself　to　the　mercies　of　a　scholar　another　time。　　Let　me
give　you　a　lift。〃

The　courteous　doctor　sprang　out　to　hand　Meta　in；　but　something　made
him　suddenly　desire　Adams　to　drive　on；　and　then　turning　round　to　the
two　young　people；　he　said；　〃Oh！〃

〃Yes；〃　said　Norman；　taking　her　hand；　and　drawing　her　towards　him。

〃What；　Meta；　my　pretty　one；　is　it　really　so？　　Is　he　to　be　happy　after
all？　　Are　you　to　be　a　Daisy　of　my　own？〃

〃If　you　will　let　me；〃　murmured　Meta；　clinging　to　her　kind　old　friend。

〃No　flower　on　earth　could　come　so　naturally　to　us；〃　said　Dr。　May。
〃And；　dear　child；　at　last　I　may　venture　to　tell　you　that　you　have　a
sanction　that　you　will　value　more　than　mine。　　Yes；　my　dear；　on　the
last　day　of　your　dear　father's　life；　when　some　foreboding　hung　upon
him；　he　spoke　to　me　of　your　prospects；　and　singled　out　this　very
Norman　as　such　as　he　would　prefer。〃

Meta's　tears　prevented　all；　save　the　two　little　words；　〃thank　you；〃
but　she　put　out　her　hand　to　Norman；　as　she　still　rested　on　the
doctor's　arm；　more　as　if　he　had　been　her　mother　than　Norman's　father。

〃Did　he？〃　from　Norman；　was　equally　inexpressive　of　the　almost
incredulous　gratitude　and　tenderness　of　his　feeling。

It　would　not　bear　talking　over　at　that　moment；　and　Dr。　May　presently
broke　the　silence　in　a　playful　tone。　〃So；　Meta；　good　men　don't　like
heiresses？〃

〃Quite　true；〃　said　Meta；　〃it　was　very　much　against　me。〃

〃Or　it　may　be　the　other　way；〃　said　Norman。

〃Eh？　　Good　men　don't　like　heiresseshere's　a　man　who　likes　an
heiresstherefore　here's　a　man　that　is　not　good？　　Ah；　ha！　Meta；　you
can　see　that　is　false　logic；　though　I've　forgotten　mine。　　And　pray；
miss；　what　are　we　to　say　to　your　uncle？〃

〃He　cannot　help　it；〃　said　Meta　quickly。

〃Ha！〃　said　the　doctor；　laughing；　〃we　remember　our　twenty…one　years；
do　we？〃

〃I　did　not　meanI　hope　I　said　nothing　wrong；〃　said　Meta；　in　blushing
distress。　　〃Only　after　what　you　said；　I　can　care　for　nothing　else。〃

〃If　I　could　only　thank　him；〃　said　Norman　fervently。

〃I　believe　you　know　how　to　do　that；　my　boy；〃　said　Dr。　May；　looking
tenderly　at　the　fairy　figure　between　them；　and　ending　with　a　sigh；
remembering；　perhaps；　the　sense　of　protection　with　which　he　had　felt
another　Margaret　lean　on　his　arm。

The　clatter　of　horses'　hoofs　caused　Meta　to　withdraw　her　hand；　and
Norman　to　retreat　to　his　own　side　of　the　lane；　as　Sir　Henry
Walkinghame　and　his　servant　overtook　them。

〃We　will　be　in　good　time　for　the　proceedings；〃　called　out　the　doctor。
〃Tell　them　we　are　coming。〃

〃I　did　not　know　you　were　walking；〃　said　Sir　Henry　to　Meta。

〃It　is　pleasant　in　the　plantations；〃　Dr。　May　answered　for　her；　〃but　I
am　afraid　we　are　late；　and　our　punctual　friends　will　be　in　despair。
Will　you　kindly　say　we　are　at　hand？〃

Sir　Henry　rode　on；　finding　that　he　was　not　to　be　allowed　to　walk　his
horse　with　them；　and　that　Miss　Rivers　had　never　looked　up。

〃Poor　Sir　Henry！〃　said　Dr。　May。

〃He　has　no　right　to　be　surprised；〃　said　Meta；　very　low。

〃And　so　you　were　marching　right　upon　Drydale！〃　continued　Dr。　May；　not
able　to　help　laughing。　　〃It　was　a　happy　dispensation　that　I　met　you。〃

〃Oh；　I　am　so　glad　of　it！〃　said　Meta。

〃Though　to　be　sure　you　were　disarming　suspicion　by　so　cautiously
keeping　the　road　between　you。　　I　should　never　have　guessed　what　you
had　been　at。〃

There　was　a　little　pause；　then　Meta　said；　rather　tremulously；
〃PleaseI　think　it　should　be　known　at　once。〃

〃Our　idle　deeds　confessed　without　loss　of　time；　miss？〃

Norman　came　across　the　path；　saying；　〃Meta　is　rightit　should　be
known。〃

〃I　don't　think　Uncle　Cosham　would　object；　especially　hearing　it　while
he　is　here；〃　said　Meta　〃and　if　he　knew　what　you　told　us。〃

〃He　goes　to…morrow；　does　he　not？〃　said　Dr。　May。

A　silence　of　perplexity　ensued。　　Meta；　brave　as　she　was；　hardly　knew
her　uncle　enough　to　volunteer；　and　Norman　was　privately　devising　a
beginning　by　the　way　of　George；　when　Dr。　May　said；　〃Well；　since　it　is
not　a　case　for　putting　Ethel　in　the　forefront；　I　must　e'en　get　it
over　for　you；　I　suppose。〃

〃Oh；　thank　you；〃　they　cried　both　at　once；　feeling　that　he　was　the
proper　person　in　every　way；　and　Norman　added；　〃The　sooner　the　better；
if　Meta〃

〃Oh；　yes；　yes；　the　sooner　the　better；〃　exclaimed　Meta。　　〃And　let　me
tell　Florapoor　dear　Florashe　is　always　so　kind。〃

A　testimony　that　was　welcome　to　Dr。　May；　who　had　once；　at　least；　been
under　the　impression　that　Flora　courted　Sir　Henry's　attentions　to　her
sister…in…law。

Further　consultation　was　hindered　by　Tom　and　Blanche　bursting　upon
them　from　the　common；　both　echoing　Norman's　former　reproach　of　〃A
pretty　guide！〃　and　while　Blanche　explained　the　sufferings　of　all　the
assembly　at　their　tardiness；　Tom；　without　knowing　it；　elucidated　what
had　been　a　mystery　to　the　doctor；　namely；　how　they　ever　met；　by　his
indignation　at　Norman's　having　assumed　the　guidance　for　which　he　was
so　unfit。

〃A　shocking　leader；　Meta　will　never　trust　him　again；〃　said　Dr。　May。

Still　Blanche　thought　them　not　nearly　sufficiently　sensible　of　their
enormities；　and　preached　eagerly　about　their　danger　of　losing
standing…room；　when　they　emerged　on　the　moor；　and　beheld　a　crowd；
above　whose　heads　rose　the　apex　of　a　triangle；　formed　by　three　poles；
sustaining　a　rope　and　huge　stone。

〃Here　comes　Dr。　Spencer；〃　she　said。　　〃I　hope　he　will　scold　you。〃

Whatever　Dr。　Spencer　might　have　suffered；　he　was　far　too　polite　to
scold；　and　a　glance　between　the　two　physicians　ended　in　a　merry
twinkle　of　his　bright　eyes。

〃This　way；〃　he　said；　〃we　are　all　ready。〃

〃But　where's　my　little　Daisy？〃　said　Dr。　May。

〃You'll　see　her　in　a　minute。　　She　is　as　good　as　gold。〃

He　drew　them　on　up　the　bankpeople　making　way　for　themtill　he　had
stationed　them　among　the　others　of　their　own　party；　beside　the　deep
trench　that　traced　the　foundation；　around　a　space　that　seemed　far　too
small。

Nearly　at　the　same　moment　began　the　soft　clear　sound　of　chanting
wafted　upon　the　wind；　then　dying　awaycarried　off　by　some　eddying
breeze；　then　clear；　and　coming　nearer　and　nearer。


　　　　　　　　　　　　　I　will　not　suffer　mine　eyes　to　sleep；
　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　Nor　mine　eye…lids　to　slumber：
　　　　　　　　　　　　　Neither　the　temples　of　my　head　to　take　any　rest；
　　　　　　　　　　　　　Until　I　find　out　a　place　for　the　temple　of　the　Lord：
　　　　　　　　　　　　　An　habitation　for　the　mighty　God　of　Jacob。


Few；　who　knew　the　history　of　Cocksmoor；　could　help　glancing　towards
the　slight　girl；　who　stood；　with　bent　head；　her　hand　clasped　over
little　Aubrey's；　while；　all　that　was　not　prayer　and　thanksgiving　in
her　mind；　was　applying　the　words　to　him；　whose　head　rested　in　t