the daisy chain, or aspirations-第147章

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in　the　same　sphere；　and　when　I　felt　that　she　was　more　to　papa　than　I
could　be；　I　looked　beyond　home　for　praise。　　I　don't　think　the　things
I　did　were　bad　in　themselvesbrought　up　as　I　have　been；　they　could
hardly　be　so。　　I　knew　what　merits　praise　and　blame　too　well　for　that…
…but　oh！　the　motive。　　I　do　believe　I　cared　very　much　for　Cocksmoor。
I　thought　it　would　be　a　grand　thing　to　bring　about；　but；　you　see；　as
it　has　turned　out；　all　I　thought　I　had　done　for　it　was　in　vain；　and
Ethel　has　been　the　real　person　and　does　not　know　it。　　I　used　to　think
Ethel　so　inferior　to　me。　　I　left　her　all　my　work　at　home。　　If　it　had
not　been　for　that；　she　might　have　been　happy　with　Norman　Ogilviefor
never　were　two　people　better　matched；　and　now　she　has　done　what　I
never　thought　to　have　left　to　anotherwatched　over　our　own　Margaret。
Oh！　how　shall　I　ever　bear　to　see　her？〃

〃My　dear；　I　am　sure　nothing　can　be　more　affectionate　than　Ethel。　　She
does　not　think　these　things。〃

〃She　does；〃　said　Flora。　　〃She　always　knew　me　better　than　I　did
myself。　　Her　straightforward　words　should　often　have　been　rebukes　to
me。　　I　shall　see　in　every　look　and　tone　the　opinion　I　have　deserved。
I　have　shrunk　from　her　steadfast　looks　ever　since　I　myself　learned
what　I　was。　　I　could　not　bear　them　nowand　yetoh；　aunt；　you　must
bring　her！　　Ethel！　my　dear；　dear　old　Kingmy　darling's　godmother
the　last　who　was　with　Margaret！〃

She　had　fallen　into　one　of　those　fits　of　weeping　when　it　was
impossible　to　attempt　anything　but　soothing　her；　but；　though　she　was
so　much　exhausted　that　Mrs。　Arnott　expected　to　be　in　great　disgrace
with　Dr。　May　for　having　let　her　talk　herself　into　this　condition；　she
found　that　he　was　satisfied　to　find　that　she　had　so　far　relieved　her
mind；　and　declared　that　she　would　be　better　now。

The　effect　of　the　conversation　was；　that　the　next　day；　the　last　of
the　twelve　Christmas　days；　when　Ethel；　whose　yearning　after　her
sister　was　almost　equally　divided　between　dread　and　eagerness
eagerness　for　her　embrace；　and　dread　of　the　chill　of　her　reserve；
came　once　again　in　hopes　of　an　interview。　　Dr。　May　called　her　at
once。　　〃I　shall　take　you　in　without　any　preparation；〃　he　said；　〃that
she　may　not　have　time　to　be　flurried。　　Only；　be　quiet　and　natural。〃

Did　he　know　what　a　mountain　there　was　in　her　throat　when　he　seemed　to
think　it　so　easy　to　be　natural？

She　found　him　leading　her　into　a　darkened　room；　and　heard　his
cheerful　tones　saying；　〃I　have　brought　Ethel　to　you！〃

〃Ethel！　oh！〃　said　a　low；　weak　voice；　with　a　sound　as　of　expecting　a
treat；　and　Ethel　was　within　a　curtain；　where　she　began；　in　the
dimness；　to　see　something　white　moving；　and　her　hands　were　clasped　by
two　long　thin　ones。　　〃There！〃　said　Dr。　May；　〃now；　if　you　will　be
good；　I　will　leave　you　alone。　　Nurse　is　by　to　look　after　you；　and　you
know　she　always　separates　naughty　children。〃

Either　the　recurrence　to　nursery　language；　or　the　mere　sisterly　touch
after　long　separation；　seemed　to　annihilate　all　the　imaginary　mutual
dread；　and；　as　Ethel　bent　lower　and　lower；　and　Flora's　arms　were
round　her；　the　only　feeling　was　of　being　together　again；　and　both　at
once　made　the　childish　gesture　of　affection；　and　murmured　the　old　pet
names　of　〃Flossy；〃　and　〃King；〃　that　belonged　to　almost　forgotten
days；　when　they　were　baby　sisters；　then　kissed　each　other　again。

〃I　can't　see　you；〃　said　Ethel；　drawing　herself　up　a　little。　　〃Why；
Flora；　you　look　like　a　little　white　shadow！〃

〃I　have　had　such　weak　eyes；〃　said　Flora；　〃and　this　dim　light　is
comfortable。　　I　see　your　old　sharp　face　quite　plain。〃

〃But　what　can　you　do　here？〃

〃Do？　　Oh；　dear　Ethel；　I　have　not　had　much　of　doing。　　Papa　says　I　have
three　years'　rest　to　make　up。〃

〃Poor　Flora！〃　said　Ethel；　〃but　I　should　have　thought　it　tiresome；
especially　for　you。〃

〃I　have　only　now　been　able　to　think　again；〃　said　Flora；　〃and　you　will
say　I　am　taking　to　quoting　poetry。　　Do　you　remember　some　lines　in
that　drama　that　Norman　admired　so　much？〃

〃Philip　von　Artevelde？〃

〃Yes。　　I　can't　recollect　them　now；　though　they　used　to　be　always
running　in　my　headsomething　about　time　to　mend　and　time　to　mourn。〃

〃These？〃　said　Ethel


　　　　　　　　　　　　　　〃He　that　lacks　time　to　mourn；　lacks　time　to　mend。
　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　Eternity　mourns　that。〃


〃I　never　had　time　before　for　either；〃　said　Flora。　　〃You　cannot　think
how　I　used　to　be　haunted　by　those；　when　I　was　chased　from　one　thing
to　another；　all　these　long；　long　eighteen　months。　　I　am　in　no　haste
to　take　up　work　again。〃

〃Mending　as　well　as　mourning；〃　said　Ethel　thoughtfully。

Flora　sighed。

〃And　now　you　have　that　dear　little　Christmas　gift　to〃　Ethel　paused。

〃She　is　not　nearly　so　fine　and　healthy　as　her　sister　was；〃　said
Flora；　〃poor　little　dear。　　You　know；　Ethel；　even　now；　I　shall　have
very　little　time　with　her　in　that　London　life。　　Her　papa　wants　me　so
much；　and　I　must　leave　her　toto　the　nurses。〃　　Flora's　voice
trembled　again。

〃Our　own　dear　old　nurse；〃　said　Ethel。

〃Oh！　　I　wanted　to　thank　you　all　for　sparing　her　to　us；〃　said　Flora。
〃George　wished　it　so　much。　　But　how　does　poor　little　Daisy　bear　it？〃

〃Very　magnanimously；〃　said　Ethel；　smiling。　　〃In　fact；　nurse　has　had
but　little　to　do　with　Daisy　of　late；　and　would　have　been　very　forlorn
at　home。　　It　is　better　for　Aubrey　and　for　her；　not　to　return　to　be
babies　to　comfort　poor　nurse。　　I　have　been　breaking　up　the　nursery；
and　taking　Gertrude　to　live　with　me。〃

〃Have　you　gone　back　there　again？〃

〃It　would　not　have　been　better　for　waiting；〃　said　Ethel；　〃and
Gertrude　was　so　proud　to　come　to　me。　　I　could　not　have　done　it
without　her；　but　papa　must　not　have　vacancy　next　to　him。〃

〃It　has　been　hard　on　you　for　me　to　engross　him；〃　said　Flora；　〃but　oh；
Ethel；　I　could　not　spare　him。　　I　don't　think　even　you　can　tell　what
papa　is。〃

〃You　have　found　it　out；〃　said　Ethel；　in　an　odd；　dry　manner；　which　in
sound；　though　not　in　feeling；　was　a　contrast　to　the　soft；　whispering；
tearful　murmurs　of　her　sister。

〃And　my　aunt！〃　continued　Flora　〃that　I　should　have　taken　up　such　a
great　piece　of　her　short　visit！〃

〃Ah！　it　is　coming　to　an　end　very　fast；〃　said　Ethel；　sighing；　〃but　you
had　the　best　right　to　her；　and　she　and　Meta　have　seen　so　much　of　each
other。　　She　tells　me　she　is　quite　satisfied　about　Meta　now。〃

〃I　am　sorry　to　see　Meta　looking　out　of　spirits；〃　said　Flora。　　〃I
almost　made　her　cry　by　saying　something　about　Norman。　　Is　there
anything　going　wrong？〃

Ethel；　as　usual；　blundered　into　the　subject。　　〃Only　about　Norman's
going　out。〃

Flora　asked　further　questions；　and　she　was　obliged　to　explain。　　It
roused　Flora's　energies　at　once。

〃This　will　never　do！〃　she　said。　　〃They　must　marry；　and　go　with　my
aunt。〃

Ethel　was　aghast。　　〃They　would　not　hear　of　it　now！〃

〃They　must。　　It　is　the　only　reasonable　thing。　　Why；　Norman　would　be
miserable；　and　as　to　Meta　Imagine　his　going　out　and　returninga
year's　work；　such　an　expense　and　loss　of　time；　besides　the　missing
Aunt　Flora。〃

〃If　it　were　not　wrong〃

〃The　waste　would　be　the　wrong　thing。　　Besides〃　and　she　told　of
Margaret's　wishes。

〃But；　Flora；　thinkthe　last　week　in　Februaryand　you　so　ill！〃

〃I　am　not　to　marry　them；〃　said　Flora；　smiling。　　〃If　it　could　be　in　a
fortnight；　they　could　go　and　get　their　outfit　afterwards；　and　come
back　to　us　when　I　am　stronger。　　Let　me　seethere　need　be　no　fuss
about　settlementsMr。　Rivers's　will　arranges　everything　for　her。〃

〃It　would　be　a　good　thing　to　get　rid　of　a　fine　wedding；〃　said　Ethel；
〃but　they　will　never　consent！〃

〃Yes；　they　will；　and　be　grateful。〃

〃Papa　would　be　happier　about　Norman；〃　said　Ethel；　〃but　I　cannot　fancy
his　liking　it。　　And　youyou　can't　spare　Meta；　for　Aunt　Flora　must　go
to　the　Arnotts'　in　a　week　or　two　more。〃

〃Suppose　papa　was　to　let　me　have　you；〃　said　Flora。　　〃If　he　wants　you；
he　must　come　after　you。〃

Ethel　gasped　at　the　thought　that　her　occupation　at　home　was　gone；　but
she　said；　〃If　I　am　not　too　awkward　for　you；　dear　Flora。　　You　will
miss　Meta　terribly。〃

〃I　can't　keep　the　humming…bird　caged；　with　her　heart　far　away；〃　said
Flora。

Dr。　May　came　in　to　break　up　the　conversation；　and　Ethel　quickly
guessed　from　his　manner　that　Norman　had　been　talking　to　him。　　Flora
told　him　that　she　had　been　agreeing　with　Ethel　that　Meta　had　much
better　not　miss　this　opportunity。　　He　was　far　less　startled　than
Ethel　had　expected；　indeed；　the　proposal　was　rather　a　relief　to　his
mind；　and　his　chief　objection　was　the　fear　that　Flora　would　be
fatigued　by　the　extra　bustle；　but　she　promised　not　to　trouble　herself
about　it；　otherwise　than　that　if　Norman　could　not　persuade　Meta；　she
would。　　The　sisters　parted；　much　more　comfortable　than　before。　　Ethel
felt　as　if　she　had　found　something　like　a　dim　reflection　of　Margaret；
and　Flora's　fear　of　Ethel　had　fled　away　from　the　mere　force　of
sisterhood。

As　to　Norman；　he　declared　that　he　had　not　the　audacity　to　make　the
proposal　to　Meta；　though　he　was　only　too　grateful；　so　his　father
carried　it　to　the　humming…bird；　and；　as　soon　as　she　found　that　it　was
not　improper；　nor　would　hurt　any　one's　feelings；　she　gave　ready
consentonly　begging　that　it　might　be　as　best　suited　every　one；
especially　Flora；　and　ending　by　a　whisper　to　her　dear　fatherly
friend；　owning　that　she　was　〃very　gladshe　meant　she　was　very　glad
there　would　be　nobody　there。〃

So　Norman　and　Meta　settled　their　plans　as　they　walked　home　together
from　evening　service；　after　listening　to　the　prophecies　of　the
blessings　to　be　spread　into　the　waste　and　desolate　places；　which
should　yet　become　the　heritage　of　the　Chosen；　and　with　the　evening
star　shining　on　them；　like　a　faint　reflex　of　the　Star　of　the　East；
Who　came　to　be　a　Light　to　lighten　the　Gentiles。




CHAPTER　XXVII。



Euna　delle　facolta　singolari　ed　incommunicabili　della　religione
Cristiana　questa；　di　poter　dare　indirizzo　e　quiete　a　chiunoque；　in
qualsivoglia　congiuntura；　a　qualsivoglia　termine；　ricorra　ad　essa。
Se　al　passato　v'e　rimedio；　essa　lo　prescrive；　lo　somministra；　presta
lume　e　vigore　per　metterlo　in　opera　a　qualunque　costo；　se　non　v'e；
essa　da　il；　modo　di　fare　realmento　e　in　effeto；　cio　che　1'　uom　dice
in　proverbio；　della　necessita　virtu。　　Insegna　a　continuare　con
sapienza　cio　che　e　stato　intrapreso　per　leggerezza；　piega　l'animo　ad
abbracciare　con　propensione　cio　che　e　stato　imposto　dalla　prepotenza；
e　da　ad　un　elezione　che　fu　temeraria；　ma　che　e　irrevocabile；　tutta　la
santita；　tutto　il　consiglio；　diciamolo　pur　francamenta；　tutte　le
gioje　della　vocazione。MANZONI。


The　wedding…day　was　fixed　for　the　20th　of　January；　since　it　was　less
risk　to　Flora　as　an　absolute　invalid；　than　as　convalescent　enough　to
take　any　share　in　the　doings。

Meta　managed　her　correspondence　with　her　own　relatives；　and　obtained
her　uncle's　kind　approval；　since　he　saw　there　could　be　nothing　else；
while　her　aunt　treated　her　as　an　infatuated　victim；　but　wished；　for
her　mother's　sake；　to　meet　her　in　London　before　she　sailed。

The　worst　stroke　of　all　was　to　Bellairs；　who　had　never　chosen　to
believe　that　her　mistress　could　move　without　her；　and　though　mortally
afraid　in　crossing　to　the　Isle　of　Wight；　and　utterly　abhorring　all
〃natives；〃　went　into　hysterics　on　finding　that　her　young　lady　would
take　out　no　maid　but　a　little　ha