the daisy chain, or aspirations-第20章

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on　you；　and　I　can　attend　to　my　own　affairs　very　well　here。〃

〃I'll　tell　you　why　I　proposed　it；〃　said　Margaret。　　〃I　think　it　would
be　a　relief　for　Ethel　to　escape　from　Miss　Winter's　beloved　Friday
questions。〃

〃Great　nonsense　they　are；〃　said　Flora。　　〃Why　don't　you　tell　Miss
Winter　they　are　of　no　use？〃

〃Mamma　never　interfered　with　them；〃　said　Margaret。　〃She　only　kept
Ethel　in　her　own　hands；　and　if　you　would　be　so　kind　as　to　change
sometimes　and　sit　in　the　school…room；　we　could　spare　Ethel；　without
hurting　Miss　Winter's　feelings。〃

〃Well；　I'll　call　Ethel；　if　you　like；　but　I　shall　go　and　practise　in
the　drawing…room。　　The　old　school…room　piano　is　fit　for　nothing　but
Mary　to　hammer　upon。〃

Flora　went　away；　evidently　annoyed；　and　Margaret's　conjectures　on　the
cause　of　it　were　cut　short　by　Ethel　running　in　with　a　slate　in　one
hand　and　two　books　in　the　other；　the　rest　having　all　tumbled　down　on
the　stairs。

〃Oh；　Margaret；　I　am　so　glad　to　come　to　you。　　Miss　Winter　has　set　Mary
to　read　〃To　be；　or　not　to　be；〃　and　it　would　have　driven　me　distracted
to　have　stayed　there。　　I　have　got　a　most　beautiful　sum　in　Compound
Proportion；　about　a　lion；　a　wolf；　and　a　bear　eating　up　a　carcase；　and
as　soon　as　they　have　done　it；　you　shall　hear　me　say　my　ancient
geography；　and　then　we　will　do　a　nice　bit　of　Tasso；　and　if　we　have
any　time　after　that；　I　have　got　such　a　thing　to　tell　youonly　I　must
not　tell　you　now；　or　I　shall　go　on　talking　and　not　finish　my
lessons。〃

It　was　not　till　all　were　done；　that　Ethel　felt　free　to　exclaim；　〃Now
for　what　I　have　been　longing　to　tell　youRichard　is　going　to〃　But
the　fates　were　unpropitious。　　Aubrey　trotted　in；　expecting　to　be
amused；　next　came　Norman；　and　Ethel　gave　up　in　despair；　and；　after
having　affronted　Flora　in　the　morning；　Margaret　was　afraid　of
renewing　the　offence；　by　attempting　to　secure　Ethel　as　her　companion
for　the　afternoon；　so　not　till　after　the　walk　could　Margaret　contrive
to　claim　the　promised；　communication；　telling　Ethel　to　come　and
settle　herself　cosily　by　her。

〃I　should　have　been　very　glad　of　you　last　evening；〃　said　she；　〃for
papa　went　to　sleep；　and　my　book　was　out　of　reach。〃

〃Oh；　I　am　sorry；　how　I　pity　you；　poor　Margaret！〃

〃I　suppose　I　have　grown　lazy；〃　said　Margaret；　〃for　I　don't　mind　those
things　now。　　I　am　never　sorry　for　a　quiet　time　to　recollect　and
consider。〃

〃It　must　be　like　the　waiting　in　the　dark　between　the　slides　of　a
magic　lantern；〃　said　Ethel；　〃I　never　like　to　be　quiet。　I　get　so
unhappy。〃

〃I　am　glad　of　resting　and　recollecting；〃　said　Margaret。　　〃It　has　all
been　so　like　a　dream；　that　merry　morning；　and　then；　slowly　waking　to
find　myself　here　in　dear　mamma's　place；　and　papa　watching　over　me。
Sometimes　I　think　I　have　not　half　understood　what　it　really　is；　and
that　I　don't　realise；　that　if　I　was　up　and　about；　I　should　find　the
house　without　her。〃

〃Yes；　that　is　the　aching　part！〃　said　Ethel。　　〃I　am　happy；　sitting　on
her　bed　here　with　you。　　You　are　a　little　of　her；　besides　being　my　own
dear　Peg…top！　　You　are　very　lucky　to　miss　the　mealtimes　and　the
evenings。〃

〃That　is　the　reason　I　don't　feel　it　wrong　to　like　to　have　papa
sitting　with　me　all　the　evening；〃　said　Margaret；　〃though　it　may　make
it　worse　for　you　to　have　him　away。　　I　don't　think　it　selfish　in　me　to
keep　him。　　He　wants　quiet　so　much；　or　to　talk　a　little　when　it　suits
him；　we　are　too　many　now；　when　he　is　tired。〃

〃Oh；　it　is　best；〃　said　Ethel。　　〃Nothing　that　you　do　is　selfishdon't
talk　of　it；　dear　Margaret。　　It　will　be　something　like　old　times　when
you　come　down　again。〃

〃But　all　this　time　you　are　not　telling　me　what　I　want　so　much　to
hear；〃　said　Margaret；　〃about　Cocksmoor。　　I　am　so　glad　Richard　has
taken　it　up。〃

〃That　he　has。　　We　are　to　go　every　Friday；　and　hire　a　room；　and　teach
the　children。　　Once　a　week　will　do　a　great　deal；　if　we　can　but　make
them　wish　to　learn。　　It　is　a　much　better　plan　than　mine；　for　if　they
care　about　it；　they　can　come　to　school　here　on　Sunday。〃

〃It　is　excellent；〃　said　Margaret；　〃and　if　he　is　at　home　till　Easter；
it　will　give　it　a　start；　and　put　you　in　the　way　of　it；　and　get　you
through　the　short　days　and　dark　evenings；　when　you　could　not　so　well
walk　home　without　him。〃

〃Yes；　and　then　we　can　all　teach；　Flora；　and　Mary；　and　you；　when　you
are　well　again。　Richard　says　it　will　be　disagreeable；　but　I　don't
think　sothey　are　such　unsophisticated　people。　　That　Granny　Hall　is
such　a　funny　old　woman；　and　the　whole　place　wants　nothing　but　a
little　care；　to　do　very　well。〃

〃You　must　prepare　for　disappointments；　dear　Ethel。〃

〃I　know；　I　know　nothing　is　done　without　drawbacks；　but　I　am　so　glad
to　make　some　beginning。〃

〃So　am　I。　　Do　you　know；　mamma　and　I　were　one　day　talking　over　those
kind　of　things；　and　she　said　she　had　always　regretted　that　she　had　so
many　duties　at　home；　that　she　could　not　attend　as　much　to　the　poor　as
she　would　like；　but　she　hoped　now　we　girls　were　growing　up；　we　should
be　able　to　do　more。

〃Did　she？〃　was　all　Ethel　said；　but　she　was　deeply　gratified。

〃I've　been　wanting　to　tell　you。　　I　knew　you　would　like　to　hear　it。
It　seems　to　set　us　to　work　so　happily。〃

〃I　only　wish　we　could　begin；〃　said　Ethel；　〃but　Richard　is　so　slow！
Of　course　we　can't　act　without　papa's　consent　and　Mr。　Wilmot's　help；
and　he　says　papa　must　not　be　worried　about　it；　he　must　watch　for　his
own　time　to　speak　about　it。〃

〃Yes〃　said　Margaret。

I　knowI　would　not　have　it　otherwise；　but　what　is　tiresome　is　this。
Richard　is　very　good；　but　he　is　so　dreadfully　hard　to　stir　up；　and
what's　worse；　so　very　much　afraid　of　papa；　that　while　he　is　thinking
about　opportunities；　they　will　all　go　by；　and　then　it　will　be　Easter；
and　nothing　done！〃

〃He　is　not　so　much　afraid　of　papa　as　he　was；〃　said　Margaret。　　〃He　has
felt　himself　useful　and　a　comfort；　and　papa　is　gentler；　and　that　has
cheered　him　out　of　the　desponding　way　that　kept　him　back　from
proposing　anything。〃

〃Perhaps；〃　said　Ethel；　〃but　I　wish　it　was　you。　　Can't　you？　you　always
know　how　to　manage。〃

〃No；　it　is　Richard's　affair；　and　he　must　do　as　he　thinks　fit。　　Don't
sigh；　dear　Ethelperhaps　he　may　soon　speak；　and；　if　not；　you　can　be
preparing　in　a　quiet　way　all　the　time。　　Don't　you　remember　how　dear
mamma　used　to　tell　us　that　things；　hastily　begun；　never　turn　out
well？〃

〃But　this　is　not　hasty。　　I've　been　thinking　about　it　these　six
weeks；〃　said　Ethel。　　〃If　one　does　nothing　but　think；　it　is　all　no
better　than　a　vision。　　I　want　to　be　doing。〃

〃Well；　you　can　be　doinglaying　a　sound　foundation；〃　said　Margaret。
〃The　more　you　consider；　and　the　wiser　you　make　yourself；　the　better
it　will　be　when　you　do　set　to　work。〃

〃You　mean　by　curing　myself　of　my　slovenly　ways　and　impatient　temper？〃

〃I　don't　know　that　I　was　exactly　thinking　of　that；〃　said　Margaret；
〃but　that　ought　to　be　the　way。　　If　we　are　not　just　the　thing　in　our
niche　at　home；　I　don't　think　we　can　do　much　real　good　elsewhere。〃

〃It　would　be　hollow；　show…goodness；〃　said　Ethel。　　〃Yes；　that　is　true；
and　it　comes　across　me　now；　and　then　what　a　horrid　wretch　I　am；　to　be
wanting　to　undertake　so　much；　when　I　leave　so　much　undone。　　But；　do
you　know；　Margaret；　there's　no　one　such　a　help　in　those　ways　as
Richard。　　Though　he　is　so　precise；　he　is　never　tiresome。　　He　makes　me
see　things；　and　do　them　neatly；　without　plaguing　me；　and　putting　me
in　a　rage。　　I'm　not　ready　to　bite　off　my　own　fingers；　or　kick　all　the
rattle…traps　over　and　leave　them；　as　I　am　when　Miss　Winter　scolds　me；
or　nurse；　or　even　Flora　sometimes；　but　it　is　as　if　I　was　gratifying
him；　and　his　funny　little　old　bachelor　tidyisms　divert　me；　besides；
he　teaches　me　the　theory；　and　never　lays　hold　of　my　poor　fingers；
and；　when　they　won't　bend　the　wrong　way；　calls　them　frogs。〃

〃He　is　a　capital　master　for　you；〃　said　Margaret；　much　amused　and
pleased；　for　Richard　was　her　especial　darling；　and　she　triumphed　in
any　eulogy　from　those　who　ordinarily　were　too　apt　to　regard　his
dullness　with　superior　compassion。

〃If　he　would　only　read　our　books；　and　enter　into　poetry　and　delight
in　it；　but　it　is　all　nonsense　to　him；〃　said　Ethel。　　〃I　can't　think
how　people　can　be　so　different；　but；　oh！　here　he　comes。　　Ritchie；　you
should　not　come　upon　us　before　we　are　aware。〃

〃What？　I　should　have　heard　no　good　of　myself？〃

〃Great　good；〃　said　Margaret〃she　was　telling　me　you　would　make　a
neat…handed　woman　of　her　in　time。〃

〃I　don't　see　why　she　should　not　be　as　neat　as　other　people；〃　said
Richard　gravely。　　〃Has　she　been　telling　you　our　plan？〃

And　it　was　again　happily　discussed；　Ethel；　satisfied　by　finding　him
fully　set　upon　the　design；　and　Margaret　giving　cordial　sympathy　and
counsel。　　When　Ethel　was　called　away；　Margaret　said；　〃I　am　so　glad
you　have　taken　it　up；　not　only　for　the　sake　of　Cocksmoor；　but　of
Ethel。　　It　is　good　for　her　not　to　spend　her　high　soul　in　dreams。〃

〃I　am　afraid　she　does　not　know　what　she　undertakes；〃　said　Richard。

〃She　does　not；　but　you　will　keep　her　from　being　turned　back。　　It　is
just　the　thing　to　prevent　her　energies　from　running　to　waste；　and　her
being　so　much　with　you；　and　working　under　you；　is　exactly　what　one
would　have　chosen。〃

〃By　contraries！〃　said　Richard；　smiling。　　〃That　is　what　I　was　afraid
of。　　I　don't　half　understand　or　follow　her；　and　when　I　think　a　thing
nonsense；　I　see　you　all　calling　it　very　fine；　and　I　don't　know　what
to　make　of　it〃

〃You　are　making　yourself　out　more　dull　than　you　are；〃　said　Margaret
affectionately。

〃I　know　I　am　stupid；　and　seem　tame　and　cold；〃　said　Richard；　〃and　you
are　the　only　one　that　does　not　care　about　it。　　That　is　what　makes　me
wish　Norman　was　the　eldest。　　If　I　were　as　clever　as　he；　I　could　do　so
much　with　Ethel；　and　be　so　much　more　to　papa。〃

〃No；　you　would　not。　　You　would　have　other　things　in　your　head。　　You
would　not　be　the　dear；　dear　old　Ritchie　that　you　are。　　You　would　not
be　a　calm；　cautious；　steady　balance　to　the　quicksilver　heads　some　of
us　have　got。　　No；　no；　Norman's　a　very　fine　fellow；　a　very　dear
fellow；　but　he　would　not　do　half　so　well　for　our　eldesthe　is　too
easily　up；　and　down　again。〃

〃And　I　am　getting　into　my　old　way　of　repining；〃　said　Richard。　　〃I
don't　mind　so　much；　since　my　father　has　at　least　one　son　to　be　proud
of；　and　I　can　be　of　some　use　to　him　now。〃

〃Of　the　greatest；　and　to　all　of　us。　　I　am　so　glad　you　can　stay　after
Christmas；　and　papa　was　pleased　at　your　offering；　and　said　he　could
not　spare　you　at　all；　though　he　would　have　tried；　if　it　had　been　any
real　advantage　to　you。〃

〃Well；　I　hope　he　will　approve。　　I　must　speak　to　him　as　soon　as　I　can
find　him　with　his　mind　tolerably　disengaged。〃

The　scene　that　ensued　that　evening　in　the　magic　lantern　before
Margaret's　bed；　did　not　promise　much　for　the　freedom　of　her　father's
mind。　　Harry　entered　with　a　resolute　manner。　　〃Margaret；　I　wanted　to
speak　to　you；〃　said　he；　spreading　himself　out；　with　an　elbow　on　each
arm　of　the　chair。　　〃I　want　you　to　speak　to　papa　about　my　going　to
sea。　　It　is　high　time　to　see　about　itI　shall　be　thirteen　on　the
fourth　of　May。〃

〃And　you　mean　it　seriously；　Harry？〃

〃Yes；　of　course　I　do；　really　and　truly；　and　if　it　is　to　come　to　pass；
it　is　time　to　take　measures。　　Don't　you　see；　Margaret？〃

〃It　is　time；　as　you　say；〃　answered　Margaret　ref