the ragged trousered philanthropists-第78章

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em　went　round　to　the　job　and　swore　that　the　room　had　had　three　coats。　　The　lady　protested　that　it　was　not　so。　　She　had　watched　the　progress　of　the　work。　　Besides；　it　was　impossible；　they　had　only　been　there　three　days。　　The　first　day　they　had　not　put　any　paint　on　at　all；　they　had　done　the　ceiling　and　stripped　the　walls；　the　painting　was　not　started　till　the　second　day。　　How　then　could　it　have　had　three　coats？　　Misery　explained　the　mystery：　he　said　that　for　first　coating　they　had　an　extra　special　very　fast…drying　paint　…　paint　that　dried　so　quickly　that　they　were　able　to　give　the　work　two　coats　in　one　day。　　For　instance；　one　man　did　the　window；　the　other　the　door：　when　these　were　finished　both　men　did　the　skirting；　by　the　time　the　skirting　was　finished　the　door　and　window　were　dry　enough　to　second　coat；　and　then；　on　the　following　day　…　the　finishing　coat！

Of　course；　this　extra　special　quick…drying　paint　was　very　expensive；　but　the　firm　did　not　mind　that。　　They　knew　that　most　of　their　customers　wished　to　have　their　work　finished　as　quickly　as　possible；　and　their　study　was　to　give　satisfaction　to　the　customers。　　This　explanation　satisfied　the　lady　…　a　poverty…stricken　widow　making　a　precarious　living　by　taking　in　lodgers　…　who　was　the　more　easily　deceived　because　she　regarded　Misery　as　a　very　holy　man；　having　seen　him　preaching　in　the　street　on　many　occasions。

There　was　another　job　at　another　boarding…house　that　Owen　and　Easton　did　…　two　rooms　which　had　to　be　painted　three　coats　of　white　paint　and　one　of　enamel；　making　four　coats　altogether。　　That　was　what　the　firm　had　contracted　to　do。　　As　the　old　paint　in　these　rooms　was　of　a　rather　dark　shade　it　was　absolutely　necessary　to　give　the　work　three　coats　before　enamelling　it。　　Misery　wanted　them　to　let　it　go　with　two；　but　Owen　pointed　out　that　if　they　did　so　it　would　be　such　a　ghastly　mess　that　it　would　never　pass。　　After　thinking　the　matter　over　for　a　few　minutes；　Misery　told　them　to　go　on　with　the　third　coat　of　paint。　　Then　he　went　downstairs　and　asked　to　see　the　lady　of　the　house。　　He　explained　to　her　that；　in　consequence　of　the　old　paint　being　so　dark；　he　found　that　it　would　be　necessary；　in　order　to　make　a　good　job　of　it；　to　give　the　work　four　coats　before　enamelling　it。　　Of　course；　they　had　agreed　for　only　three；　but　as　they　always　made　a　point　of　doing　their　work　in　a　first…class　manner　rather　than　not　make　a　good　job；　they　would　give　it　the　extra　coat　for　nothing；　but　he　was　sure　she　would　not　wish　them　to　do　that。　　The　lady　said　that　she　did　not　want　them　to　work　for　nothing；　and　she　wanted　it　done　properly。　　If　it　were　necessary　to　give　it　an　extra　coat；　they　must　do　so　and　she　would　pay　for　it。　　How　much　would　it　be？　　Misery　told　her。　　The　lady　was　satisfied；　and　Misery　was　in　the　seventh　heaven。　　Then　he　went　upstairs　again　and　warned　Owen　and　Easton　to　be　sure　to　say；　if　they　were　asked；　that　the　work　had　had　four　coats。

It　would　not　be　reasonable　to　blame　Misery　or　Rushton　for　not　wishing　to　do　good；　honest　work　…　there　was　no　incentive。　　When　they　secured　a　contract；　if　they　had　thought　first　of　making　the　very　best　possible　job　of　it；　they　would　not　have　made　so　much　profit。　　The　incentive　was　not　to　do　the　work　as　well　as　possible；　but　to　do　as　little　as　possible。　　The　incentive　was　not　to　make　good　work；　but　to　make　good　profit。

The　same　rule　applied　to　the　workers。　　They　could　not　justly　be　blamed　for　not　doing　good　work　…　there　was　no　incentive。　　To　do　good　work　requires　time　and　pains。　　Most　of　them　would　have　liked　to　take　time　and　pains；　because　all　those　who　are　capable　of　doing　good　work　find　pleasure　and　happiness　in　doing　it；　and　have　pride　in　it　when　done：　but　there　was　no　incentive；　unless　the　certainty　of　getting　the　sack　could　be　called　an　incentive；　for　it　was　a　moral　certainty　that　any　man　who　was　caught　taking　time　and　pains　with　his　work　would　be　promptly　presented　with　the　order　of　the　boot。　　But　there　was　plenty　of　incentive　to　hurry　and　scamp　and　slobber　and　botch。

There　was　another　job　at　a　lodging…house　…　two　rooms　to　be　painted　and　papered。　　The　landlord　paid　for　the　work；　but　the　tenant　had　the　privilege　of　choosing　the　paper。　　She　could　have　any　pattern　she　liked　so　long　as　the　cost　did　not　exceed　one　shilling　per　roll；　Rushton's　estimate　being　for　paper　of　that　price。　　Misery　sent　her　several　patterns　of　sixpenny　papers；　marked　at　a　shilling；　to　choose　from；　but　she　did　not　fancy　any　of　them；　and　said　that　she　would　come　to　the　shop　to　make　her　selection。　　So　Hunter　tore　round　to　the　shop　in　a　great　hurry　to　get　there　before　her。　　In　his　haste　to　dismount；　he　fell　off　his　bicycle　into　the　muddy　road；　and　nearly　smashed　the　plate…glass　window　with　the　handle…bar　of　the　machine　as　he　placed　it　against　the　shop　front　before　going　in。

Without　waiting　to　clean　the　mud　off　his　clothes；　he　ordered　Budd；　the　pimply…faced　shopman；　to　get　out　rolls　of　all　the　sixpenny　papers　they　had；　and　then　they　both　set　to　work　and　altered　the　price　marked　upon　them　from　sixpence　to　a　shilling。　　Then　they　got　out　a　number　of　shilling　papers　and　altered　the　price　marked　upon　them；　changing　it　from　a　shilling　to　one　and　six。

When　the　unfortunate　woman　arrived；　Misery　was　waiting　for　her　with　a　benign　smile　upon　his　long　visage。　　He　showed　her　all　the　sixpenny　ones；　but　she　did　not　like　any　of　them；　so　after　a　while　Nimrod　suggested　that　perhaps　she　would　like　a　paper　of　a　little　better　quality；　and　she　could　pay　the　trifling　difference　out　of　her　own　pocket。　　Then　he　showed　her　the　shilling　papers　that　he　had　marked　up　to　one　and　sixpence；　and　eventually　the　lady　selected　one　of　these　and　paid　the　extra　sixpence　per　roll　herself；　as　Nimrod　suggested。　　There　were　fifteen　rolls　of　paper　altogether　…　seven　for　one　room　and　eight　for　the　other　…　so　that　in　addition　to　the　ordinary　profit　on　the　sale　of　the　paper　…　about　two　hundred　and　seventy…five　per　cent。　…　the　firm　made　seven　and　sixpence　on　this　transaction。　　They　might　have　done　better　out　of　the　job　itself　if　Slyme　had　not　been　hanging　the　paper　piece…work；　for；　the　two　rooms　being　of　the　same　pattern；　he　could　easily　have　managed　to　do　them　with　fourteen　rolls；　in　fact；　that　was　all　he　did　use；　but　he　cut　up　and　partly　destroyed　the　one　that　was　over　so　that　he　could　charge　for　hanging　it。

Owen　was　working　there　at　the　same　time；　for　the　painting　of　the　rooms　was　not　done　before　Slyme　papered　them；　the　finishing　coat　was　put　on　after　the　paper　was　hung。　　He　noticed　Slyme　destroying　the　paper　and；　guessing　the　reason；　asked　him　how　he　could　reconcile　such　conduct　as　that　with　his　profession　of　religion。

Slyme　replied　that　the　fact　that　he　was　a　Christian　did　not　imply　that　he　never　did　anything　wrong：　if　he　committed　a　sin；　he　was　a　Christian　all　the　same；　and　it　would　be　forgiven　him　for　the　sake　of　the　Blood。　As　for　this　affair　of　the　paper；　it　was　a　matter　between　himself　and　God；　and　Owen　had　no　right　to　set　himself　up　as　a　Judge。

In　addition　to　all　this　work；　there　were　a　number　of　funerals。　　Crass　and　Slyme　did　very　well　out　of　it　all；　working　all　day　white…washing　or　painting；　and　sometimes　part　of　the　night　painting　venetian　blinds　or　polishing　coffins　and　taking　them　home；　to　say　nothing　of　the　lifting　in　of　the　corpses　and　afterwards　acting　as　bearers。

As　time　went　on；　the　number　of　small　jobs　increased；　and　as　the　days　grew　longer　the　men　were　allowed　to　put　in　a　greater　number　of　hours。　Most　of　the　firms　had　some　work；　but　there　was　never　enough　to　keep　all　the　men　in　the　town　employed　at　the　same　time。　　It　worked　like　this：　Every　firm　had　a　certain　number　of　men　who　were　regarded　as　the　regular　hands。　When　there　was　any　work　to　do；　they　got　the　preference　over　strangers　or　outsiders。　　When　things　were　busy；　outsiders　were　taken　on　temporarily。　　When　the　work　fell　off；　these　casual　hands　were　the　first　to　be　‘stood　still'。　　If　it　continued　to　fall　off；　the　old　hands　were　also　stood　still　in　order　of　seniority；　the　older　hands　being　preferred　to　strangers　…　so　long；　of　course；　as　they　were　not　old　in　the　sense　of　being　aged　or　inefficient。

This　kind　of　thing　usually　continued　all　through　the　spring　and　summer。　　In　good　years　the　men　of　all　trades；　carpenters；　bricklayers；　plasterers；　painters　and　so　on；　were　able　to　keep　almost　regularly　at　work；　except　in　wet　weather。

The　difference　between　a　good　and　bad　spring　and　summer　is　that　in　good　years　it　is　sometimes　possible　to　make　a　little　overtime；　and　the　periods　of　unemployment　are　shorter　and　less　frequent　than　in　bad　years。　　It　is　rare　even　in　good　years　for　one　of　the　casual　hands　to　be　employed　by　one　firm　for　more　than　one；　two　or　three　months　without　a　break。　　It　is　usual　for　them　to　put　in　a　month　with　one　firm；　then　a　fortnight　with　another；　then　perhaps　six　weeks　somewhere　else；　and　often　between　there　are　two　or　three　days　or　even　weeks　of　enforced　idleness。　　This　sort　of　thing　goes　on　all　through　spring；　summer　and　autumn。



Chapter　41

The　Easter　Offering。　　The　Beano　Meeting


By　the　beginning　of　April；　Rushton　&　Co。　were　again　working　nine　hours　a　day；　from　seven　in　the　morning　till　five…thirty　at　night；　and　after　Easter　they　started　working　full　time　from　6　A。M。　till　5。30　P。M。；　eleven　and　a　half　hours　…　or；　rather；　ten　hours；　for　they　had　to　lose　half　an　hour　at　breakfast　and　an　hour　at　dinner。

Just　before　Easter　several　of　the　men　asked　Hunter　if　they　might　be　allowed　to　work　on　Good　Friday　and　Easter　Monday；　as；　they　said；　they　had　had　enough　holidays　during　the　winter；　they　had　no　money　to　spare　for　holiday…making；　and　they　did　not　wish　to　lose　two　days'　pay　when　there　was　work　to　be　done。　　Hunter　told　them　that　there　was　not　sufficient　work　in　to　justify　him　in　doing　as　they　requested：　things　were　getting　very　slack　again；　and　Mr　Rushton　had　decided　to　cease　work　from　Thursday　night　till　Tuesday　morning。　　They　were　thus　prevented　from　working　on　Good　Friday；　but　it　is　true　that　not　more　than　one　working　man　in　fifty　went　to　any　religious　service　on　that　day　or　on　any　other　day　during　the　Easter　festival。　　On　the　contrary；　this　festival　was　the　occasion　of　much　cursing　and　blaspheming　on　the　part　of　those　whose　penniless；　poverty…stricken　condition　it　helped　to　aggravate　by　enforcing　unprofitable　idleness　which　they　lacked　the　means　to　enjoy。

During　these　holidays　some　of　the　men　did　little　jobs　on　their　own　account　and　others　put　in　the　whole　time　…　including　Good　Friday　and　Easter　Sunday　…　gardening；　digging　and　planting　their　plots　of　allotment　ground。

When　Owen　arrived　home　one　evening　during　the　week　before　Easter；　Frankie　gave　him　an　envelope　which　he　had　brought　home　from　school。　It　contained　a　printed　leaflet：

　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　CHURCH　OF　THE　WHITED　SEPULCHRE；　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　MUGSBOROUGH

　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　Easter　19

Dear　Sir　（or　Madam）；

In　accordance　with　the　usual　custom　we　invite　you　to　join　with　us　in　presenting　the　Vicar；　the　Rev。　Habbakuk　Bosher；　with　an　Easter　Offering；　as　a　token　of　affection　and　regard。

　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　Yours　faithfully；　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　A。　Cheeseman　｝　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　W。　Taylor　　　　｝　　Churchwardens

Mr　Bosher's　income　from　various　sources　connected　with　the　church　was　over　six　hund