the ragged trousered philanthropists-第84章

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to　get　a　better　price　for　their　work；　and　the　men　might　have　had　better　wages　and　conditions。　　The　hands；　however；　made　no　such　allowances　or　excuses　as　these　for　Misery　and　Rushton。　　They　never　thought　or　spoke　of　them　except　with　hatred　and　curses。　　But　whenever　either　of　them　came　to　the　‘job'　the　‘coddies'　cringed　and　grovelled　before　them；　greeting　them　with　disgustingly　servile　salutations；　plentifully　interspersed　with　the　word　‘Sir'；　greetings　which　were　frequently　either　ignored　altogether　or　answered　with　an　inarticulate　grunt。　　They　said　‘Sir'　at　nearly　every　second　word：　it　made　one　feel　sick　to　hear　them　because　it　was　not　courtesy：　they　were　never　courteous　to　each　other；　it　was　simply　abject　servility　and　self…contempt。

One　of　the　results　of　all　the　frenzied　hurrying　was　that　every　now　and　then　there　was　an　accident：　somebody　got　hurt：　and　it　was　strange　that　accidents　were　not　more　frequent；　considering　the　risk；　that　were　taken。　　When　they　happened　to　be　working　on　ladders　in　busy　streets　they　were　not　often　allowed　to　have　anyone　to　stand　at　the　foot；　and　the　consequence　was　that　all　sorts　and　conditions　of　people　came　into　violent　collision　with　the　bottoms　of　the　ladders。　　Small　boys　playing　in　the　reckless　manner　characteristic　of　their　years　rushed　up　against　them。　　Errand　boys；　absorbed　in　the　perusal　of　penny　instalments　of　the　adventures　of　Claude　Duval；　and　carrying　large　baskets　of　green…groceries；　wandered　into　them。　　Blind　men　fell　foul　of　them。　Adventurous　schoolboys　climbed　up　them。　　People　with　large　feet　became　entangled　in　them。　　Fat　persons　of　both　sexes　who　thought　it　unlucky　to　walk　underneath；　tried　to　negotiate　the　narrow　strip　of　pavement　between　the　foot　of　the　ladder　and　the　kerb；　and　in　their　passage　knocked　up　against　the　ladder　and　sometimes　fell　into　the　road。　Nursemaids　wheeling　perambulators　…　lolling　over　the　handle；　which　they　usually　held　with　their　left　hands；　the　right　holding　a　copy　of　Orange　Blossoms　or　some　halfpenny　paper；　and　so　interested　in　the　story　of　the　Marquis　of　Lymejuice　…　a　young　man　of　noble　presence　and　fabulous　wealth；　with　a　drooping　golden　moustache　and　very　long　legs；　who；　notwithstanding　the　diabolical　machinations　of　Lady　Sibyl　Malvoise；　who　loves　him　as　well　as　a　woman　with　a　name　like　that　is　capable　of　loving　anyone；　is　determined　to　wed　none　other　than　the　scullery…maid　at　the　Village　Inn　…　inevitably　bashed　the　perambulators　into　the　ladders。　　Even　when　the　girls　were　not　reading　they　nearly　always　ran　into　the　ladders；　which　seemed　to　possess　a　magnetic　attraction　for　perambulators　and　go…carts　of　all　kinds；　whether　propelled　by　nurses　or　mothers。　　Sometimes　they　would　advance　very　cautiously　towards　the　ladder：　then；　when　they　got　very　near；　hesitate　a　little　whether　to　go　under　or　run　the　risk　of　falling　into　the　street　by　essaying　the　narrow　passage：　then　they　would　get　very　close　up　to　the　foot　of　the　ladder；　and　dodge　and　dance　about；　and　give　the　cart　little　pushes　from　side　to　side；　until　at　last　the　magnetic　influence　exerted　itself　and　the　perambulator　crashed　into　the　ladder；　perhaps　at　the　very　moment　that　the　man　at　the　top　was　stretching　out　to　do　some　part　of　the　work　almost　beyond　his　reach。

Once　Harlow　had　just　started　painting　some　rainpipes　from　the　top　of　a　40…ft　ladder　when　one　of　several　small　boys　who　were　playing　in　the　street　ran　violently　against　the　foot。　　Harlow　was　so　startled　that　he　dropped　his　brushes　and　clutched　wildly　at　the　ladder；　which　turned　completely　round　and　slid　about　six　feet　along　the　parapet　into　the　angle　of　the　wall；　with　Harlow　hanging　beneath　by　his　hands。　　The　paint　pot　was　hanging　by　a　hook　from　one　of　the　rungs；　and　the　jerk　scattered　the　brown　paint　it　contained　all　over　Harlow　and　all　over　the　brickwork　of　the　front　of　the　house。　　He　managed　to　descend　safely　by　clasping　his　legs　round　the　sides　of　the　ladder　and　sliding　down。　When　Misery　came　there　was　a　row　about　what　he　called　carelessness。　And　the　next　day　Harlow　had　to　wear　his　Sunday　trousers　to　work。

On　another　occasion　they　were　painting　the　outside　of　a　house　called　‘Gothic　Lodge'。　　At　one　corner　it　had　a　tower　surmounted　by　a　spire　or　steeple；　and　this　steeple　terminated　with　an　ornamental　wrought…iron　pinnacle　which　had　to　be　painted。　　The　ladder　they　had　was　not　quite　long　enough；　and　besides　that；　as　it　had　to　stand　in　a　sort　of　a　courtyard　at　the　base　of　the　tower；　it　was　impossible　to　slant　it　sufficiently：　instead　of　lying　along　the　roof　of　the　steeple；　it　was　sticking　up　in　the　air。

When　Easton　went　up　to　paint　the　pinnacle　he　had　to　stand　on　almost　the　very　top　rung　of　the　ladder；　to　be　exact；　the　third　from　the　top；　and　lean　over　to　steady　himself　by　holding　on　to　the　pinnacle　with　his　left　hand　while　he　used　the　brush　with　his　right。　　As　it　was　only　about　twenty　minutes'　work　there　were　two　men　to　hold　the　foot　of　the　ladder。

It　was　cheaper　to　do　it　this　way　than　to　rig　up　a　proper　scaffold；　which　would　have　entailed　perhaps　two　hours'　work　for　two　or　three　men。　　Of　course　it　was　very　dangerous；　but　that　did　not　matter　at　all；　because　even　if　the　man　fell　it　would　make　no　difference　to　the　firm　…　all　the　men　were　insured　and　somehow　or　other；　although　they　frequently　had　narrow　escapes；　they　did　not　often　come　to　grief。

On　this　occasion；　just　as　Easton　was　finishing　he　felt　the　pinnacle　that　he　was　holding　on　to　give　way；　and　he　got　such　a　fright　that　his　heart　nearly　stopped　beating。　　He　let　go　his　hold　and　steadied　himself　on　the　ladder　as　well　as　he　was　able；　and　when　he　had　descended　three　or　four　steps　…　into　comparative　safety　…　he　remained　clinging　convulsively　to　the　ladder　and　feeling　so　limp　that　he　was　unable　to　go　down　any　further　for　several　minutes。　　When　he　arrived　at　the　bottom　and　the　others　noticed　how　white　and　trembling　he　was；　he　told　them　about　the　pinnacle　being　loose；　and　the　‘coddy'　coming　along　just　then；　they　told　him　about　it；　and　suggested　that　it　should　be　repaired；　as　otherwise　it　might　fall　down　and　hurt　someone：　but　the　‘coddy'　was　afraid　that　if　they　reported　it　they　might　be　blamed　for　breaking　it；　and　the　owner　might　expect　the　firm　to　put　it　right　for　nothing；　so　they　decided　to　say　nothing　about　it。　　The　pinnacle　is　stilt　on　the　apex　of　the　steeple　waiting　for　a　sufficiently　strong　wind　to　blow　it　down　on　somebody's　head。

When　the　other　men　heard　of　Easton's　‘narrow　shave'；　most　of　them　said　that　it　would　have　served　him　bloody　well　right　if　he　had　fallen　and　broken　his　neck：　he　should　have　refused　to　go　up　at　all　without　a　proper　scaffold。　　That　was　what　THEY　would　have　done。　　If　Misery　or　the　coddy　had　ordered　any　of　THEM　to　go　up　and　paint　the　pinnacle　off　that　ladder；　they　would　have　chucked　their　tools　down　and　demanded　their　ha'pence！

That　was　what　they　said；　but　somehow　or　other　it　never　happened　that　any　of　them　ever　‘chucked　their　tools　down'　at　all；　although　such　dangerous　jobs　were　of　very　frequent　occurrence。

The　scamping　business　was　not　confined　to　houses　or　properties　of　an　inferior　class：　it　was　the　general　rule。　　Large　good…class　houses；　villas　and　mansions；　the　residences　of　wealthy　people；　were　done　in　exactly　the　same　way。　　Generally　in　such　places　costly　and　beautiful　materials　were　spoilt　in　the　using。

There　was　a　large　mansion　where　the　interior　woodwork　…　the　doors；　windows　and　staircase　…　had　to　be　finished　in　white　enamel。　　It　was　rather　an　old　house　and　the　woodwork　needed　rubbing　down　and　filling　up　before　being　repainted；　but　of　course　there　was　not　time　for　that；　so　they　painted　it　without　properly　preparing　it　and　when　it　was　enamelled　the　rough；　uneven　surface　of　the　wood　looked　horrible：　but　the　owner　appeared　quite　satisfied　because　it　was　nice　and　shiny。　　The　dining…room　of　the　same　house　was　papered　with　a　beautiful　and　expensive　plush　paper。　　The　ground　of　this　wall…hanging　was　made　to　imitate　crimson　watered　silk；　and　it　was　covered　with　a　raised　pattern　in　plush　of　the　same　colour。　　The　price　marked　on　the　back　of　this　paper　in　the　pattern　book　was　eighteen　shillings　a　roll。　　Slyme　was　paid　sixpence　a　roll　for　hanging　it：　the　room　took　ten　rolls；　so　it　cost　nine　pounds　for　the　paper　and　five　shillings　to　hang　it！　　To　fix　such　a　paper　as　this　properly　the　walls　should　first　be　done　with　a　plain　lining　paper　of　the　same　colour　as　the　ground　of　the　wallpaper　itself；　because　unless　the　paperhanger　‘lapps'　the　joints　…　which　should　not　be　done　…　they　are　apt　to　open　a　little　as　the　paper　dries　and　to　show　the　white　wall　underneath　…　Slyme　suggested　this　lining　to　Misery；　who　would　not　entertain　the　idea　for　a　moment　…　they　had　gone　to　quite　enough　expense　as　it　was；　stripping　the　old　paper　off！

So　Slyme　went　ahead；　and　as　he　had　to　make　his　wages；　he　could　not　spend　a　great　deal　of　time　over　it。　　Some　of　the　joints　were　‘lapped'　and　some　were　butted；　and　two　or　three　weeks　after　the　owner　of　the　house　moved　in；　as　the　paper　became　more　dry；　the　joints　began　to　open　and　to　show　the　white　plaster　of　the　wall；　and　then　Owen　had　to　go　there　with　a　small　pot　of　crimson　paint　and　a　little　brush；　and　touch　out　the　white　line。

While　he　was　doing　this　he　noticed　and　touched　up　a　number　of　other　faults；　places　where　Slyme　…　in　his　haste　to　get　the　work　done　…　had　slobbered　and　smeared　the　face　of　the　paper　with　fingermarks　and　paste。

The　same　ghastly　mess　was　made　of　several　other　‘jobs'　besides　this　one；　and　presently　they　adopted　the　plan　of　painting　strips　of　colour　on　the　wall　in　the　places　where　the　joints　would　come；　so　that　if　they　opened　the　white　wall　would　not　show：　but　it　was　found　that　the　paste　on　the　back　of　the　paper　dragged　the　paint　off　the　wall；　and　when　the　joints　opened　the　white　streaks　showed　all　the　same；　so　Misery　abandoned　all　attempts　to　prevent　joints　showing；　and　if　a　customer　complained；　he　sent　someone　to　‘touch　it　up'：　but　the　lining　paper　was　never　used；　unless　the　customer　or　the　architect　knew　enough　about　the　work　to　insist　upon　it。

In　other　parts　of　the　same　house　the　ceilings；　the　friezes；　and　the　dados；　were　covered　with　‘embossed'　or　‘relief'　papers。　　These　hangings　require　very　careful　handling；　for　the　raised　parts　are　easily　damaged；　but　the　men　who　fixed　them　were　not　allowed　to　take　the　pains　and　time　necessary　to　make　good　work：　consequently　in　many　places　…　especially　at　the　joints　…　the　pattern　was　flattened　out　and　obliterated。

The　ceiling　of　the　drawing…room　was　done　with　a　very　thick　high…relief　paper　that　was　made　in　sheets　about　two　feet　square。　　These　squares　were　not　very　true　in　shape：　they　had　evidently　warped　in　drying　after　manufacture：　to　make　them　match　anything　like　properly　would　need　considerable　time　and　care。　　But　the　men　were　not　allowed　to　take　the　necessary　time。　　The　result　was　that　when　it　was　finished　it　presented　a　sort　of　‘higgledy…piggledy'　appearance。　　But　it　didn't　matter：　nothing　seemed　to　matter　except　to　get　it　done。　　One　would　think　from　the　way　the　hands　were　driven　and　chivvied　and　hurried　over　the　work　that　they　were　being　paid　five　or　six　shillings　an　hour　instead　of　as　many　pence。

‘Get　it　done！'　shouted　Misery　from　morning　till　night。　　‘For　God's　sake　get　it　done！　　Haven't　you　finished　yet？　　We're　losing　money　over　this　〃job〃！　　If　you　chaps　don't　wake