a simpleton-第12章

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perplexed；　for　lo！　a　teapot　of　some　base　material；　but　simple　and
elegant　in　form；　being　an　exact　reproduction　of　a　melon；　and　inside
this　teapot　a　canvas　bag　containing　ten　guineas　in　silver；　and　a
wash…leather　bag　containing　twenty　guineas　in　gold；　and　a　slip　of
paper；　which　Rosa；　being　now　half　recovered　from　her　stupefaction；
read　out　to　her　father　and　Dr。　Staines：


〃People　that　buy　presents　blindfold　give　duplicates　and
triplicates；　and　men　seldom　choose　to　a　woman's　taste；　so　be
pleased　to　accept　the　enclosed　tea…leaves；　and　buy　for　yourself。
The　teapot　you　can　put　on　the　hob；　for　it　is　nickel。〃


Rosa　looked　sore　puzzled　again。　　〃Papa；〃　said　she；　timidly；　〃have
we　any　friend　that　isa　littlederanged？〃

〃A　lot。〃

〃Oh；　then；　that　accounts。〃

〃Why　no；　love；〃　said　Christopher。　　〃I　have　heard　of　much　learning
making　a　man　mad；　but　never　of　much　good　sense。〃

〃What！　　Do　you　call　this　sensible？〃

〃Don't　you？〃

〃I'll　read　it　again；〃　said　Rosa。　　〃WellyesI　declareit　is　not
so　mad　as　I　thought；　but　it　is　very　eccentric。〃

Lusignan　suggested　there　was　nothing　so　eccentric　as　common　sense；
especially　in　time　of　wedding。　　〃This；〃　said　he；　〃comes　from　the
City。　　It　is　a　friend　of　mine；　some　old　fox；　he　is　throwing　dust　in
your　eyes　with　his　reasons；　his　real　reason　was　that　his　time　is
money；　it　would　have　cost　the　old　rogue　a　hundred　pounds'　worth　of
timeyou　know　the　City；　Christopherto　go　out　and　choose　the　girl
a　present；　so　he　has　sent　his　clerk　out　with　a　check　to　buy　a
pewter　teapot；　and　fill　it　with　specie。〃

〃Pewter！〃　cried　Rosa。　　〃No　such　thing！　　It's　nickel。　　What　is
nickel；　I　wonder？〃

The　handwriting　afforded　no　clew；　so　there　the　discussion　ended：
but　it　was　a　nice　little　mystery；　and　very　convenient；　made
conversation。　　Rosa　had　many　an　animated　discussion　about　it　with
her　female　friends。

The　wedding…day　came　at　last。　　The　sun　shoneACTUALLY；　as　Rosa
observed。　　The　carriages　drove　up。　　The　bridesmaids；　principally
old　schoolfellows　and　impassioned　correspondents　of　Rosa；　were
pretty；　and　dressed　alike　and　delightfully；　but　the　bride　was
peerless；　her　Southern　beauty　literally　shone　in　that　white　satin
dress　and　veil；　and　her　head　was　regal　with　the　Crown　of　orange…
blossoms。　　Another　crown　she　hadtrue　virgin　modesty。　　A　low
murmur　burst　from　the　men　the　moment　they　saw　her；　the　old　women
forgave　her　beauty　on　the　spot；　and　the　young　women　almost　pardoned
it；　she　was　so　sweet　and　womanly；　and　so　sisterly　to　her　own　sex。

When　they　started　for　the　church　she　began　to　tremble；　she　scarce
knew　why；　and　when　the　solemn　words　were　said；　and　the　ring　was　put
on　her　finger；　she　cried　a　little；　and　looked　half　imploringly　at
her　bridesmaids　once；　as　if　seared　at　leaving　them　for　an　untried
and　mysterious　life　with　no　woman　near。

They　were　married。　　Then　came　the　breakfast；　that　hour　of
uneasiness　and　blushing　to　such　a　bride　as　this；　but　at　last　she
was　released。　　She　sped　up…stairs；　thanking　goodness　it　was　over。
Down　came　her　last　box。　　The　bride　followed　in　a　plain　travelling
dress；　which　her　glorious　eyes　and　brows　and　her　rich　glowing
cheeks　seemed　to　illumine：　she　was　handed　into　the　carriage；　the
bridegroom　followed。　　All　the　young　guests　clustered　about　the
door；　armed　with　white　shoesslippers　are　gone　by。

They　started；　the　ladies　flung　their　white　shoes　right　and　left
with　religious　impartiality；　except　that　not　one　of　their　missiles
went　at　the　object。　　The　men；　more　skilful；　sent　a　shower　on　to　the
roof　of　the　carriage；　which　is　the　lucky　spot。　　The　bride　kissed
her　hand；　and　managed　to　put　off　crying；　though　it　cost　her　a
struggle。　　The　party　hurrahed；　enthusiastic　youths　gathered　fallen
shoes；　and　ran　and　hurled　them　again　with　cheerful　yells；　and　away
went　the　happy　pair；　the　bride　leaning　sweetly　and　confidingly　with
both　her　white　hands　on　the　bridegroom's　shoulder；　while　he　dried
the　tears　that　would　run　now　at　leaving　home　and　parent　forever；
and　kissed　her　often；　and　encircled　her　with　his　strong　arm；　and
murmured　comfort；　and　love；　and　pride；　and　joy；　and　sweet　vows　of
lifelong　tenderness　into　her　ears；　that　soon　stole　nearer　his　lips
to　hear；　and　the　fair　cheek　grew　softly　to　his　shoulder。


CHAPTER　VI。


Dr。　Staines　and　Mrs。　Staines　visited　France；　Switzerland；　and　the
Rhine；　and　passed　a　month　of　Elysium　before　they　came　to　London　to
face　their　real　destiny　and　fight　the　battle　of　life。

And　here；　methinks；　a　reader　of　novels　may　perhaps　cry　out　and　say；
〃What　manner　of　man　is　this；　who　marries　his　hero　and　heroine；　and
then；　instead　of　leaving　them　happy　for　life；　and　at　rest　from　his
uneasy　pen　and　all　their　other　troubles；　flows　coolly　on　with　their
adventures？〃

To　this　I　can　only　reply　that　the　old　English　novel　is　no　rule　to
me；　and　life　is；　and　I　respectfully　propose　an　experiment。　　Catch
eight　old　married　people；　four　of　each　sex；　and　say　unto　them；
〃Sir；〃　or　〃Madam；　did　the　more　remarkable　events　of　your　life　come
to　you　before　marriage　or　after？〃　　Most　of　them　will　say　〃after；〃
and　let　that　be　my　excuse　for　treating　the　marriage　of　Christopher
Staines　and　Rosa　Lusignan　as　merely　one　incident　in　their　lives；　an
incident　which；　so　far　from　ending　their　story；　led　by　degrees　to
more　striking　events　than　any　that　occurred　to　them　before　they
were　man　and　wife。

They　returned；　then；　from　their　honey　tour；　and　Staines；　who　was
methodical　and　kept　a　diary；　made　the　following　entry　therein：

〃We　have　now　a　life　of　endurance；　and　self…denial；　and　economy；
before　us；　we　have　to　rent　a　house；　and　furnish　it；　and　live　in　it；
until　professional　income　shall　flow　in　and　make　all　things　easy：
and　we　have　two　thousand　five　hundred　pounds　left　to　do　it　with。〃

They　came　to　a　family　hotel；　and　Dr。　Staines　went　out　directly
after　breakfast　to　look　for　a　house。　　Acting　on　a　friend's　advice；
he　visited　the　streets　and　places　north　of　Oxford　Street；　looking
for　a　good　commodious　house　adapted　to　his　business。　　He　found
three　or　four　at　fair　rents；　neither　cheap　nor　dear；　the　district
being　respectable　and　rather　wealthy；　but　no　longer　fashionable。
He　came　home　with　his　notes；　and　found　Rosa　beaming　in　a　crisp
peignoir；　and　her　lovely　head　its　natural　size　and　shape；　high…bred
and　elegant。　　He　sat　down；　and　with　her　hand　in　his　proceeded　to
describe　the　houses　to　her；　when　a　waiter　threw　open　the　door
〃Mrs。　John　Cole。〃

〃Florence！〃　cried　Rosa；　starting　up。

In　flowed　Florence：　they　both　uttered　a　little　squawk　of　delight；
and　went　at　each　other　like　two　little　tigresses；　and　kissed　in
swift　alternation　with　a　singular　ardor；　drawing　their　crests　back
like　snakes；　and　then　darting　them　forward　and　inflicting　what；　to
the　male　philosopher　looking　on；　seemed　hard　kisses；　violent
kisses；　rather　than　the　tender　ones　to　be　expected　from　two　tender
creatures　embracing　each　other。

〃Darling；〃　said　Rosa；　〃I　knew　you　would　be　the　first。　　Didn't　I
tell　you　so；　Christopher？My　husbandmy　darling　Florry！　　Sit
down；　love；　and　tell　me　everything；　he　has　just　been　looking　out
for　a　house。　　Ah！　you　have　got　all　that　over　long　ago：　she　has　been
married　six　months。　　Florry；　you　are　handsomer　than　ever；　and　what
a　beautiful　dress！　　Ah！　London　is　the　place。　　Real　Brussels；　I
declare；〃　and　she　took　hold　of　her　friend's　lace　and　gloated　on　it。

Christopher　smiled　good…naturedly；　and　said；　〃I　dare　say　you　ladies
have　a　good　deal　to　say　to　each　other。〃

〃Oceans；〃　said　Rosa。

〃I　will　go　and　hunt　houses　again。〃

〃There's　a　good　husband；〃　said　Mrs。　Cole；　as　soon　as　the　door
closed　on　him；　〃and　such　a　fine　man！　　Why；　he　must　be　six　feet。
Mine　is　rather　short。　　But　he　is　very　good；　refuses　me　nothing。　　My
will　is　law。〃

〃That　is　all　rightyou　are　so　sensible；　but　I　want　governing　a
little；　and　I　like　itactually。　　Did　the　dressmaker　find　it；
dear？〃

〃Oh；　no！　　I　had　it　by　me。　　I　bought　it　at　Brussels　on　our　wedding
tour：　it　is　dearer　there　than　in　London。〃

She　said　this　as　if　〃dearer〃　and　〃better〃　were　synonymous。

〃But　about　your　house；　Rosie　dear？〃

〃Yes；　darling；　I'll　tell　you　all　about　it。　　I　never　saw　a　moire
this　shade　before。　　I　don't　care　for　them　in　general；　but　this　is
so　distingue。〃

Florence　rewarded　her　with　a　kiss。

〃The　house；〃　said　Rosa。　　〃Oh；　he　has　seen　one　in　Portman　Street；
and　one　in　Gloucester　Place。〃

〃Oh；　that　will　never　do；〃　cried　Mrs。　Cole。　　〃It　is　no　use　being　a
physician　in　those　out…of…the…way　places。　　He　must　be　in　Mayfair。〃

〃Must　he？〃

〃Of　course。　　Besides；　then　my　Johnnie　can　call　him　in　when　they　are
just　going　to　die。　　Johnnie　is　a　general　prac。；　and　makes　two
thousand　a　year；　and　he　shall　call　your　one　in；　but　he　must　live　in
Mayfair。　　Why；　Rosie；　you　would　not　be　such　a　goose　as　to　live　in
those　placesthey　are　quite　gone　by。〃

〃I　shall　do　whatever　you　advise　me；　dear。　　Oh；　what　a　comfort　to
have　a　dear　friend：　and　six　months　married；　and　knows　things。　　How
richly　it　is　trimmed！　　Why；　it　is　nearly　all　trimmings。〃

〃That　is　the　fashion。〃

〃Oh！〃

And　after　that　big　word　there　was　no　more　to　be　said。

These　two　ladies　in　their　conversation　gravitated　towards　dress；
and　fell　flat　on　it　every　half…minute。　　That　great　and　elevating
topic　held　them　by　a　silken　cord；　but　it　allowed　them　to　flutter
upwards　into　other　topics；　and　in　those　intervals；　numerous　though
brief；　the　lady　who　had　been　married　six　months　found　time　to
instruct　the　matrimonial　novice　with　great　authority；　and　even　a
shade　of　pomposity。　　〃My　dear；　the　way　ladies　and　gentlemen　get　a
housein　the　first　place；　you　don't　go　about　yourself　like　that；
and　you　never　go　to　the　people　themselves；　or　you　are　sure　to　be
taken　in；　but　to　a　respectable　house…agent。〃

〃Yes；　dear；　that　must　be　the　best　way；　one　would　think。〃

〃Of　course　it　is；　and　you　ask　for　a　house　in　Mayfair；　and　he　shows
you　several；　and　recommends　you　the　best；　and　sees　you　are　not
cheated。〃

〃Thank　you；　love；〃　said　Rosa；　〃now　I　know　what　to　do；　I'll　not
forget　a　word。　　And　the　train　so　beautifully　shaped！　　Ah！　it　is
only　in　London　or　Paris　they　can　make　a　dress　flow　behind　like
that；〃　etc。；　etc。

Dr。　Staines　came　back　to　dinner　in　good　spirits；　he　had　found　a
house　in　Harewood　Square；　good　entrance　hall；　where　his　gratuitous
patients　might　sit　on　benches；　good　dining…room　where　his　superior
patients　might　wait；　and　good　library；　to　be　used　as　a　consulting…
room。　　Rent　only　eighty…five　pounds　per　annum。

But　Rosa　told　him　that　would　never　do；　a　physician　must　be　in　the
fashionable　part　of　the　town。

〃Eventually；〃　said　Christopher；　〃but　surely　at　first　startingand
you　know　they　say　little　boats　should　not　go　too　far　from　shore。〃

Then　Rosa　repeated　all　her　friend's　arguments；　and　seemed　so
unhappy　at　the　idea　of　not　living　near　her；　that　Staines；　who　had
not　yet　said　the　hard　word　〃no〃　to　her；　gave　in；　consoling　his
prudence　with　the　reflection　that；　after　all；　Mr。　Cole　could　put
many　a　guinea　in　his　way；　for　Mr。　Cole　was　middle…aged；though　his
wife　was　young；and　had　really　a　very　large　practice。

So　next　day；　the　newly…wedded　pair　called　on　a　house…agent　in
Mayfair；　and　his　son　and　partner　went　with　them　to　several　places。
The　rents　of　houses　equal　to　that　in　Harewood　Squa