a simpleton-第18章

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hard　to　rise　at　all；no；　India　was　the　place。　　〃As　for　me；　I　made
my　fortune　there　in　ten　years。　　Obliged　to　leave　it　nowinvalid
this　many　years；　no　TONE。　　Tried　two　or　three　doctors　in　this
neighborhood；　heard　there　was　a　new　one；　had　written　a　book　on
something。　　Thought　I　would　try　HIM。〃

To　stop　him；　Staines　requested　to　feel　his　pulse；　and　examine　his
tongue　and　eye。

〃You　are　suffering　from　indigestion；〃　said　he。　　〃I　will　write　you　a
prescription；　but　if　you　want　to　get　well；　you　must　simplify　your
diet　very　much。〃

While　he　was　writing　the　prescription；　off　went　this　patient's
tongue；　and　ran　through　the　topics　of　the　day　and　into　his　family
history　again。

Staines　listened　politely。　　He　could　afford　it；　having　only　this
one。

At　last；　the　first　patient；　having　delivered　an　octavo　volume　of
nothing；　rose　to　go；　but　it　seems　that　speaking　an　〃infinite　deal
of　nothing〃　exhausts　the　body；　though　it　does　not　affect　the　mind；
for　the　first　patient　sank　down　in　his　chair　again。　　〃I　have
excited　myself　too　muchfeel　rather　faint。〃

Staines　saw　no　signs　of　coming　syncope；　he　rang　the　bell　quietly；
and　ordered　a　decanter　of　sherry　to　be　brought；　the　first　patient
filled　himself　a　glass；　then　another；　and　went　off；　revived；　to
chatter　elsewhere。　　But　at　the　door　he　said；　〃I　had　always　a
running　account　with　Dr。　Mivar。　　I　suppose　you　don't　object　to　that
system。　　Double　fee　the　first　visit；　single　afterwards。〃

Dr。　Staines　bowed　a　little　stiffly；　he　would　have　preferred　the
money。　　However；　he　looked　at　the　Blue　Book；　and　found　his　visitor
lived　at　47　Manchester　Square；　so　that　removed　his　anxiety。

The　first　patient　called　every　other　day；　chattered　nineteen　to　the
dozen；　was　exhausted；　drank　two　glasses　of　sherry；　and　drove　away。

Soon　after　this　a　second　patient　called。　　This　one　was　a　deputy
patientCollett；　a　retired　butlerkept　a　lodging…house；　and
waited　at　parties；　he　lived　close　by；　but　had　a　married　daughter　in
Chelsea。　　Would　the　doctor　visit　her；　and　HE　would　be　responsible？

Staines　paid　the　woman　a　visit　or　two；　and　treated　her　so
effectually；　that　soon　her　visits　were　paid　to　him。　　She　was　cured；
and　Staines；　who　by　this　time　wanted　to　see　money；　sent　to　Collett。

Collett　did　not　answer。

Staines　wrote　warmly。

Collett　dead　silent。

Staines　employed　a　solicitor。

Collett　said　he　had　recommended　the　patient；　that　was　all。　　He　had
never　said　he　would　pay　her　debts。　　That　was　her　husband's
business。

Now　her　husband　was　the　mate　of　a　ship；　would　not　be　in　England　for
eighteen　months。

The　woman；　visited　by　lawyer's　clerk；　cried　bitterly；　and　said　she
and　her　children　had　scarcely　enough　to　eat。

Lawyer　advised　Staines　to　abandon　the　case；　and　pay　him　two　pounds
fifteen　shillings　expenses。　　He　did　so。

〃This　is　damnable；〃　said　he。　　〃I　must　get　it　out　of　Pettigrew；　by…
the…by；　he　has　not　been　here　this　two　days。〃

He　waited　another　day　for　Pettigrew；　and　then　wrote　to　him。　　No
answer。　　Called。　　Pettigrew　gone　abroad。　　House　in　Manchester
Square　to　let。

Staines　went　to　the　house…agent　with　his　tale。　　Agent　was
impenetrable　at　first；　but；　at　last；　won　by　the　doctor's　manner　and
his　unhappiness；　referred　him　to　Pettigrew's　solicitor；　the
solicitor　was　a　respectable　man；　and　said　he　would　forward　the
claim　to　Pettigrew　in　Paris。

But　by　this　time　Pettigrew　was　chattering　and　guzzling　in　Berlin；
and　thence　he　got　to　St。　Petersburg。　　In　that　stronghold　of
gluttony；　he　gormandized　more　than　ever；　and；　being　unable　to　talk
it　off　his　stomach；　as　in　other　cities；　had　apoplexy；　and　died。

But　long　before　this　Staines　saw　his　money　was　as　irrecoverable　as
his　sherry；　and　he　said　to　Rosa；　〃I　wonder　whether　I　shall　ever
live　to　curse　the　human　race？〃

〃Heaven　forbid！〃　said　Rosa。　　〃Oh；　they　use　you　cruelly；　my　poor；
poor　Christie！〃

Thus　for　months　the　young　doctor's　patients　bled　him；　and　that　was
all。

And　Rosa　got　more　and　more　moped　at　being　in　the　house　so　much；　and
pestered　Christopher　to　take　her　out；　and　he　declined：　and；　being　a
man　hard　to　beat；　took　to　writing　on　medical　subjects；　in　hopes　of
getting　some　money　from　the　various　medical　and　scientific
publications；　but　he　found　it　as　hard　to　get　the　wedge　in　there　as
to　get　patients。

At　last　Rosa's　remonstrances　began　to　rise　into　something　that
sounded　like　reproaches。　　One　Sunday　she　came　to　him　in　her　bonnet；
and　interrupted　his　studies；　to　say　he　might　as　well　lay　down　the
pen；　and　talk。　　Nobody　would　publish　anything　he　wrote。

Christopher　frowned；　but　contained　himself；　and　laid　down　the　pen。

〃I　might　as　well　not　be　married　at　all　as　be　a　doctor's　wife。　　You
are　never　seen　out　with　me；　not　even　to　church。　　Do　behave　like　a
Christian；　and　come　to　church　with　me　now。〃

Dr。　Staines　shook　his　head。

〃Why；　I　wouldn't　miss　church　for　all　the　world。　　Any　excitement　is
better　than　always　moping。　　Come　over　the　water　with　me。　　The　time
Jane　and　I　went；　the　clergyman　read　a　paper　that　Mr。　Brown　had
fallen　down　in　a　fit。　　There　was　such　a　rush　directly；　and　I'm　sure
fifty　ladies　went　outfancy；　all　Mrs。　Browns！　　Wasn't　that　fun？〃

〃Fun？　　I　don't　see　it。　　Well；　Rosa；　your　mind　is　evidently　better
adapted　to　diversion　than　mine　is。　　Go　you　to　church；　love；　and
I'll　continue　my　studies。〃

〃Then　all　I　can　say　is；　I　wish　I　was　back　in　my　father's　house。
Husband！　friend！　companion！I　have　none。〃

Then　she　burst　out　crying　violently；　and；　being　shocked　at　what　she
had　said；　and　at　the　agony　it　had　brought　into　her　husband's　face；
she　went　off　into　hysterics；　and　as　his　heart　would　not　let　him
bellow　at　her；　or　empty　a　bucket　on　her　as　he　would　on　another
patient；　she　had　a　good　long　bout　of　them：　and　got　her　way；　for　she
broke　up　his　studies　for　that　day；　at　all　events。

Even　after　the　hysterics　were　got　under；　she　continued　to　moan　and
sigh　very　prettily；　with　her　lovely；　languid　head　pillowed　on　her
husband's　arm；　in　a　word；　though　the　hysterics　were　real；　yet　this
innocent　young　person　had　the　presence　of　mind　to　postpone　entire
convalescence；　and　lay　herself　out　to　be　petted　all　day。　　But　fate
willed　it　otherwise：　while　she　was　sighing　and　moaning；　came　to　the
door　a　scurrying　of　feet；　and　then　a　sharp；　persistent　ringing　that
meant　something。　　The　moaner　cocked　eye　and　ear；　and　said；　in　her
every…day　voice；　which；　coming　so　suddenly；　sounded　very　droll；
〃What　is　that；　I　wonder？〃

Jane　hurried　to　the　street…door；　and　Rosa　recovered　by　magic；　and；
preferring　gossip　to　hysterics；　in　an　almost　gleeful　whisper；
ordered　Christopher　to　open　the　door　of　the　study。　　The　Bijou　was
so　small　that　the　following　dialogue　rang　in　their　ears：

A　boy　in　buttons　gasped　out；　〃Oh；　if　you　please；　will　you　ast　the
doctor　to　come　round　directly；　there's　a　haccident。〃

〃La；　bless　me！〃　said　Jane；　and　never　budged。

〃Yes；　miss。　　It's　our　missus's　little　girl　fallen　right　off　an
i…chair；　and　cut　her　head　dreadful；　and　smothered　in　blood。〃

〃La；　to　be　sure！〃　And　she　waited　steadily　for　more。

〃Ay；　and　missus　she　fainted　right　off；　and　I've　been　to　the　regler
doctor；　which　he's　out；　and　Sarah；　the　housemaid；　said　I　had　better
come　here；　you　was　only　just　set　up；　she　said；　you　wouldn't　have　so
much　to　do；　says　she。〃

〃That　is　all　SHE　knows；〃　said　Jane。　　〃Why；　our　masterthey　pulls
him　in　pieces　which　is　to　have　him　fust。〃

〃What　an　awful　liar！　　Oh；　you　good　girl！〃　whispered　Dr。　Staines　and
Rosa　in　one　breath。

〃Ah；　well；〃　said　Buttons；　〃any　way；　Sarah　says　she　knows　you　are
clever；　'cos　her　little　girl　as　lives　with　her　mother；　and　calls
Sarah　aunt；　has　bin　to　your　'spensary　with　ringworm；　and　you　cured
her　right　off。〃

〃Ay；　and　a　good　many　more；〃　said　Jane；　loftily。　　She　was　a
housemaid　of　imagination；　and　while　Staines　was　putting　some　lint
and　an　instrument　case　into　his　pocket；　she　proceeded　to　relate　a
number　of　miraculous　cures。　　Dr。　Staines　interrupted　them　by
suddenly　emerging；　and　inviting　Buttons　to　take　him　to　the　house。

Mrs。　Staines　was　so　pleased　with　Jane　for　cracking　up　the　doctor；
that　she　gave　her　five　shillings；　and；　after　that；　used　to　talk　to
her　a　great　deal　more　than　to　the　cook；　which　judicious　conduct
presently　set　all　three　by　the　ears。

Buttons　took　the　doctor　to　a　fine　house　in　the　same　street；　and
told　him　his　mistress's　name　on　the　wayMrs。　Lucas。　　He　was　taken
up　to　the　nursery；　and　found　Mrs。　Lucas　seated；　crying　and
lamenting；　and　a　woman　holding　a　little　girl　of　about　seven；　whose
brow　had　been　cut　open　by　the　fender；　on　which　she　had　fallen　from
a　chair；　it　looked　very　ugly；　and　was　even　now　bleeding。

Dr。　Staines　lost　no　time；　he　examined　the　wound　keenly；　and　then
said　kindly　to　Mrs。　Lucas；　〃I　am　happy　to　tell　you　it　is　not
serious。〃　　He　then　asked　for　a　large　basin　and　some　tepid　water；
and　bathed　it　so　softly　and　soothingly　that　the　child　soon　became
composed；　and　the　mother　discovered　the　artist　at　once。　　He
compressed　the　wound；　and　explained　to　Mrs。　Lucas　that　the
principal　thing　really　was　to　avoid　an　ugly　scar。　　〃There　is　no
danger；〃　said　he。　　He　then　bound　the　wound　neatly　up；　and　had　the
girl　put　to　bed。　　〃You　will　not　wake　her　at　any　particular　hour；
nurse。　　Let　her　sleep。　　Have　a　little　strong　beef…tea　ready；　and
give　it　her　at　any　hour；　night　or　day；　she　asks　for　it。　　But　do　not
force　it　on　her；　or　you　will　do　her　more　harm　than　good。　　She　had
better　sleep　before　she　eats。〃

Mrs。　Lucas　begged　him　to　come　every　morning；　and；　as　he　was　going；
she　shook　hands　with　him；　and　the　soft　palm　deposited　a　hard
substance　wrapped　in　paper。　　He　took　it　with　professional　gravity
and　seeming　unconsciousness；　but；　once　outside　the　house；　went　home
on　wings。　　He　ran　up　to　the　drawing…room；　and　found　his　wife
seated；　and　playing　at　reading。　　He　threw　himself　on　his　knees；　and
the　fee　into　her　lap；　and；　while　she　unfolded　the　paper　with　an
ejaculation　of　pleasure；　he　said；　〃Darling；　the　first　real　patient
the　first　real　fee。　　It　is　yours　to　buy　the　new　bonnet。〃

〃Oh；　I'm　so　glad！〃　said　she；　with　her　eyes　glistening。　　〃But　I'm
afraid　one　can't　get　a　bonnet　fit　to　wearfor　a　guinea。〃

Dr。　Staines　visited　his　little　patient　every　day；　and　received　his
guinea。　　Mrs。　Lucas　also　called　him　in　for　her　own　little　ailments；
and　they　were　the　best　possible　kind　of　ailments：　for；　being
imaginary；　there　was　no　limit　to　them。

Then　did　Mrs。　Staines　turn　jealous　of　her　husband。　　〃They　never　ask
me；〃　said　she；　〃and　I　am　moped　to　death。〃

〃It　is　hard；〃　said　Christopher；　sadly。　　〃But　have　a　little
patience。　　Society　will　come　to　you　long　before　practice　comes　to
me。〃

About　two　o'clock　one　afternoon　a　carriage　and　pair　drove　up；　and　a
gorgeous　footman　delivered　a　card〃Lady　Cicely　Treherne。〃

Of　course　Mrs。　Staines　was　at　home；　and　only　withheld　by　propriety
from　bounding　into　the　passage　to　meet　her　school…fellow。　　However；
she　composed　herself　in　the　drawing…room；　and　presently　the　door
was　opened；　and　a　very　tall　young　woman；　richly　but　not　gayly
dressed；　drifted　into　the　room；　and　stood　there　a　statue　of
composure。

Rosa　had　risen　to　fly　to　her；　but　the　reverence　a　girl　of　eighteen
strikes　into　a　child　of　twelve　hung　about　her　still；　and　she　came
timidly　forward；　blushing　and