a simpleton-第6章

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our　own；　neither　public　satire　nor　private　remonstrance　has　ever
shaken　any　of　their　monstrous　fashions。　　Easy；　obliging；　pliable；
and　weaker　of　will　than　men　in　other　things；　do　but　touch　their
dress；　however　objectionable；　and　rock　is　not　harder；　iron　is　not
more　stubborn；　than　these　soft　and　yielding　creatures。　　It　is　no
earthly　use　my　comingI'll　come。〃

He　came　that　very　evening；　and　saw　directly　she　was　worse。　　〃Of
course；〃　said　he；　sadly；　〃you　have　not　taken　my　advice。〃

Rosa　replied　with　a　toss　and　an　evasion；　〃I　was　not　worth　a
prescription！〃

〃A　physician　can　prescribe　without　sending　his　patient　to　the
druggist；　and　when　he　does；　then　it　is　his　words　are　gold。〃

Rosa　shook　her　head　with　an　air　of　lofty　incredulity。

He　looked　ruefully　at　Mr。　Lusignan　and　was　silent。　　Rosa　smiled
sarcastically；　she　thought　he　was　at　his　wit's　end。

Not　quite：　he　was　cudgelling　his　brains　in　search　of　some　horribly
unscientific　argument；　that　might　prevail；　for　he　felt　science
would　fall　dead　upon　so　fair　an　antagonist。　　At　last　his　eye
kindled；　he　had　hit　on　an　argument　unscientific　enough　for　anybody；
he　thought。　　Said　he；　ingratiatingly；　〃You　believe　the　Old
Testament？〃

〃Of　course　I　do；　every　syllable。〃

〃And　the　lessons　it　teaches？〃

〃Certainly！〃

〃Then　let　me　tell　you　a　story　from　that　book。　　A　Syrian　general　had
a　terrible　disease。　　He　consulted　Elisha　by　deputy。　　Elisha　said；
'Bathe　seven　times　in　a　certain　river；　Jordan；　and　you　will　get
well。'　　The　general　did　not　like　this　at　all；　he　wanted　a
prescription；　wanted　to　go　to　the　druggist；　didn't　believe　in
hydropathy　to　begin；　and；　in　any　case；　turned　up　his　nose　at
Jordan。　　What！　bathe　in　an　Israelitish　brook；　when　his　own　country
boasted　noble　rivers；　with　a　reputation　for　sanctity　into　the
bargain？　　In　short；　he　preferred　his　leprosy　to　such　irregular
medicine。　　But　it　happened；　by　some　immense　fortuity；　that　one　of
his　servants；　though　an　Oriental；　was　a　friend；　instead　of　a
flatterer；　and　this　sensible　fellow　said；　'If　the　prophet　told　you
to　do　some　great　and　difficult　thing；　to　get　rid　of　this　fearful
malady；　would　not　you　do　it；　however　distasteful？　and　can　you
hesitate　when　he　merely　says；　Wash　in　the　Jordan；　and　be　healed？'
The　general　listened　to　good　sense；　and　cured　himself。　　Your　case
is　parallel。　　You　would　take　quantities　of　foul　medicine；　you　would
submit　to　some　painful　operation；　if　life　and　health　depended　on
it；　then　why　not　do　a　small　thing　for　a　great　result？　　You　have
only　to　take　off　an　unnatural　machine　which　cripples　your　growing
frame；　and　was　unknown　to　every　one　of　the　women　whose　forms　in
Parian　marble　the　world　admires。　　Off　with　that　monstrosity；　and
your　cure　is　as　certain　as　the　Syrian　general's；　though　science；
and　not　inspiration；　dictates　the　easy　remedy。〃

Rosa　had　listened　impatiently；　and　now　replied　with　some　warmth；
〃This　is　shockingly　profane。　　The　idea　of　comparing　yourself　to
Elisha；　and　me　to　a　horrid　leper！　　Much　obliged！　　Not　that　I　know
what　a　leper　is。〃

〃Come；　come！　that　is　not　fair；〃　said　Mr。　Lusignan。　　〃He　only
compared　the　situation；　not　the　people。〃

〃But；　papa；　the　Bible　is　not　to　be　dragged　into　the　common　affairs
of　life。〃

〃Then　what　on　earth　is　the　use　of　it？〃

〃Oh；　papa！　　Well；　it　is　not　Sunday；　but　I　have　had　a　sermon。　　This
is　the　clergyman；　and　you　are　the　commentatorhe！　he！　　And　so　now
let　us　go　back　from　divinity　to　medicine。　　I　repeat〃　（this　was　the
first　time　she　had　said　it）　〃that　my　other　doctors　give　me　real
prescriptions；　written　in　hieroglyphics。　　You　can't　look　at　them
without　feeling　there　MUST　be　something　in　them。〃

An　angry　spot　rose　on　Christopher's　cheek；　but　he　only　said；　〃And
are　your　other　doctors　satisfied　with　the　progress　your　disorder　is
making　under　their　superintendence？〃

〃Perfectly！　　Papa；　tell　him　what　they　say；　and　I'll　find　him　their
prescriptions。〃　　She　went　to　a　drawer；　and　rummaged；　affecting　not
to　listen。

Lusignan　complied。　　〃First　of　all；　sir；　I　must　tell　you　they　are
confident　it　is　not　the　lungs；　but　the　liver。〃

〃The　what！〃　shouted　Christopher。

〃Ah！〃　screamed　Rosa。　　〃Oh；　don't！bawling！〃

〃And　don't　you　screech；〃　said　her　father；　with　a　look　of　misery　and
apprehension　impartially　distributed　on　the　resounding　pair。

〃You　must　have　misunderstood　them；〃　murmured　Staines；　in　a　voice
that　was　now　barely　audible　a　yard　off。　　〃The　hemorrhage　of　a
bright　red　color；　and　expelled　without　effort　or　nausea？〃

〃From　the　liverthey　have　assured　me　again　and　again；〃　said
Lusignan。

Christopher's　face　still　wore　a　look　of　blank　amazement；　till　Rosa
herself　confirmed　it　positively。

Then　he　cast　a　look　of　agony　upon　her；　and　started　up　in　a　passion；
forgetting　once　more　that　his　host　abhorred　the　sonorous。　　〃Oh；
shame！　shame！〃　he　cried；　〃that　the　noble　profession　of　medicine
should　be　disgraced　by　ignorance　such　as　this。〃　　Then　he　said；
sternly；　〃Sir；　do　not　mistake　my　motives；　but　I　decline　to　have
anything　further　to　do　with　this　case；　until　those　two　gentlemen
have　been　relieved　of　it；　and；　as　this　is　very　harsh；　and　on　my
part　unprecedented；　I　will　give　you　one　reason　out　of　many　I　COULD
give　you。　　Sir；　there　is　no　road　from　the　liver　to　the　throat　by
which　blood　can　travel　in　this　way；　defying　the　laws　of　gravity；
and　they　knew；　from　the　patient；　that　no　strong　expellent　force　has
ever　been　in　operation。　　Their　diagnosis；　therefore；　implies
agnosis；　or　ignorance　too　great　to　be　forgiven。　　I　will　not　share
my　patient　with　two　gentlemen　who　know　so　little　of　medicine；　and
know　nothing　of　anatomy；　which　is　the　A　B　C　of　medicine。　　Can　I　see
their　prescriptions？〃

These　were　handed　to　him。　　〃Good　heavens！〃　said　he；　〃have　you　taken
all　these？〃

〃Most　of　them。〃

〃Why；　then　you　have　drunk　about　two　gallons　of　unwholesome　liquids；
and　eaten　a　pound　or　two　of　unwholesome　solids。　　These　medicines
have　co…operated　with　the　malady。　　The　disorder　lies；　not　in　the
hemorrhage；　but　in　the　precedent　extravasation　that　is　a　drain　on
the　system；　and　how　is　the　loss　to　be　supplied？　　Why；　by　taking　a
little　more　nourishment　than　before；　there　is　no　other　way；　and
probably　Nature；　left　to　herself；　might　have　increased　your
appetite　to　meet　the　occasion。　　But　those　two　worthies　have　struck
that　weapon　out　of　Nature's　hand；　they　have　peppered　away　at　the
poor　ill…used　stomach　with　drugs　and　draughts；　not　very　deleterious
I　grant　you；　but　all　more　or　less　indigestible；　and　all　tending；
not　to　whet　the　appetite；　but　to　clog　the　stomach；　or　turn　the
stomach；　or　pester　the　stomach；　and　so　impair　the　appetite；　and　so
co…operate；　indirectly；　with　the　malady。〃

〃This　is　good　sense；〃　said　Lusignan。　　〃I　declare；　II　wish　I　knew
how　to　get　rid　of　them。〃

〃Oh；　I'll　do　that；　papa。〃

〃No；　no；　it　is　not　worth　a　rumpus。〃

〃I'll　do　it　too　politely　for　that。　　Christopher；　you　are　very
cleverTERRIBLY　clever。　　Whenever　I　threw　their　medicines　away；　I
was　always　a　little　better　that　day。　　I　will　sacrifice　them　to　you。
It　IS　a　sacrifice。　　They　are　both　so　kind　and　chatty；　and　don't
grudge　me　hieroglyphics；　now　you　do。〃

She　sat　down　and　wrote　two　sweet　letters　to　Dr。　Snell　and　Mr。
Wyman；　thanking　them　for　the　great　attention　they　had　paid　her；　but
finding　herself　getting　steadily　worse；　in　spite　of　all　they　had
done　for　her；　she　proposed　to　discontinue　her　medicines　for　a　time；
and　try　change　of　air。

〃And　suppose　they　call　to　see　whether　you　are　changing　the　air？〃

〃In　that　case；　papa'not　at　home。'〃

The　notes　were　addressed　and　despatched。

Then　Dr。　Staines　brightened　up；　and　said　to　Lusignan；　〃I　am　now
happy　to　tell　you　that　I　have　overrated　the　malady。　　The　sad　change
I　see　in　Miss　Lusignan　is　partly　due　to　the　great　bulk　of
unwholesome　esculents　she　has　been　eating　and　drinking　under　the
head　of　medicines。　　These　discontinued；　she　might　linger　on　for
years；　existing；　though　not　livingthe　tight…laced　cannot　be　said
to　live。　　But　if　she　would　be　healthy　and　happy；　let　her　throw　that
diabolical　machine　into　the　fire。　　It　is　no　use　asking　her　to
loosen　it；　she　can't。　　Once　there；　the　temptation　is　too　strong。
Off　with　it；　and；　take　my　word；　you　will　be　one　of　the　healthiest
and　most　vigorous　young　ladies　in　Europe。〃

Rosa　looked　rueful；　and　almost　sullen。　　She　said　she　had　parted
with　her　doctors　for　him；　but　she　really　could　not　go　about　without
stays。　　〃They　are　as　loose　as　they　can　be。　　See！〃

〃That　part　of　the　programme　is　disposed　of；〃　said　Christopher。
〃Please　go　on　to　No。　2。　　How　about　the　raw　red　line　where　the　loose
machine　has　sawed　you？〃

〃What　red　line？　　No　such　thing！　　Somebody　or　other　has　been　peeping
in　at　my　window。　　I'll　have　the　ivy　cut　down　to…morrow。〃

〃Simpleton！〃　said　Mr。　Lusignan；　angrily。　　〃You　have　let　the　cat　out
of　the　bag。　　There　is　such　a　mark；　then；　and　this　extraordinary
young　man　has　discerned　it　with　the　eye　of　science。〃

〃He　never　discerned　it　at　all；〃　said　Rosa；　red　as　fire；　〃and；　what
is　more；　he　never　will。〃

〃I　don't　want　to。　　I　should　be　very　sorry　to。　　I　hope　it　will　be
gone　in　a　week。〃

〃I　wish　YOU　were　gone　nowexposing　me　in　this　cruel　way；〃　said
Rosa；　angry　with　herself　for　having　said　an　idiotic　thing；　and
furious　with　him　for　having　made　her　say　it。

〃Oh；　Rosa！〃　said　Christopher；　in　a　voice　of　tenderest　reproach。

But　Mr。　Lusignan　interfered　promptly。　　〃Rosa；　no　noise。　　I　will　not
have　you　snapping　at　your　best　friend　and　mine。　　If　you　are
excited；　you　had　better　retire　to　your　own　room　and　compose
yourself。　　I　hate　a　clamor。〃

Rosa　made　a　wry　face　at　this　rebuke；　and　then　began　to　cry　quietly。

Every　tear　was　like　a　drop　of　blood　from　Christopher's　heart。
〃Pray　don't　scold　her；　sir；〃　said　he；　ready　to　snivel　himself。
〃She　meant　nothing　unkind：　it　is　only　her　pretty　sprightly　way；　and
she　did　not　really　imagine　a　love　so　reverent　as　mine〃

〃Don't　YOU　interfere　between　my　father　and　me；〃　said　this
reasonable　young　lady；　now　in　an　ungovernable　state　of　feminine
irritability。

〃No；　Rosa；〃　said　Christopher；　humbly。　　〃Mr。　Lusignan；〃　said　he；　〃I
hope　you　will　tell　her　that；　from　the　very　first；　I　was　unwilling
to　enter　on　this　subject　with　HER。　　Neither　she　nor　I　can　forget　my
double　character。　　I　have　not　said　half　as　much　to　her　as　I　ought；
being　her　physician；　and　yet　you　see　I　have　said　more　than　she　can
bear　from　me；　who；　she　knows；　love　her　and　revere　her。　　Then；　once
for　all；　do　pray　let　me　put　this　delicate　matter　into　your　hands：
it　is　a　case　for　parental　authority。〃

〃Unfatherly　tyranny；　that　means；〃　said　Rosa。　　〃What　business　have
gentlemen　interfering　in　such　things？　　It　is　unheard　of。　　I　will
not　submit　to　it；　even　from　papa。〃

〃Well；　you　need　not　scream　at　me；〃　said　Mr。　Lusignan；　and　he
shrugged　his　shoulders　to　Staines。　　〃She　is　impracticable；　you　see。
If　I　do　my　duty；　there　will　be　a　disturbance。〃

Now　this　roused　the　bile　of　Dr。　Staines。　　〃What；　sir！〃　said　he；
〃you　could　separate　her　and　me　by　your　authority；　here　in　this　very
room；　and　yet；　when　her　life　is　at　stake；　you　abdicate！　　You　could
part　her　from　a　man　who　loved　her　with　every　drop　of　his　heart；
and　she　said　she　loved　him；　or；　at　all　events；　preferred　him　to
others；and　you　cannot　part　her　from