a simpleton-第65章

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and　that　I　was　nearer　death　for　that　woman　than　ever　man　was；　and
lost　my　reason　for　her；　and　went　through　toil　and　privations；
hunger；　exile；　mainly　for　her；　and　then　to　find　the　banns　cried　in
open　church；　with　that　scoundrel！say　no　more；　uncle。　　I　shall
never　reproach　her；　and　never　forgive　her。〃

〃She　was　deceived。〃

〃I　don't　doubt　that；　but　nobody　has　a　right　to　be　so　great　a　fool
as　all　that。〃

〃It　was　not　her　folly；　but　her　innocence；　that　was　imposed　on。　　You
a　philosopher；　and　not　know　that　wisdom　itself　is　sometimes　imposed
on；　and　deceived　by　cunning　folly！　　Have　you　forgotten　your
Milton？


　　　　　〃'At　Wisdom's　gate；　Suspicion　sleeps；
　　　　　　　And　deems　no　ill　where　no　ill　seems。'


Come；　come！　are　you　sure　you　are　not　a　little　to　blame？　　Did　you
write　home　the　moment　you　found　you　were　not　dead？〃

Christopher　colored　high。

〃Evidently　not；〃　said　the　keen　old　man。　　〃Ah；　my　fine　fellow！　have
I　found　the　flaw　in　your　own　armor？〃

〃I　did　wrong；　but　it　was　for　her。　　I　sinned　for　her。　　I　could　not
bear　her　to　be　without　money；　and　I　knew　the　insuranceI　sinned
for　her。　　She　has　sinned　AGAINST　me。〃

〃And　she　had　much　better　have　sinned　against　God；　hadn't　she？　　He
is　more　forgiving　than　we　perfect　creatures　that　cheat　insurance
companies。　　And　so；　my　fine　fellow；　you　hid　the　truth　from　her　for
two　or　three　months。〃

No　answer。

〃Strike　off　those　two　or　three　months；　would　the　banns　have　ever
been　cried？〃

〃Well；　uncle；〃　said　Christopher；　hard　pressed；　〃I　am　glad　she　has
got　a　champion；　and　I　hope　you　will　always　keep　your　eye　on　her。〃

〃I　mean　to。〃

〃Good…morning。〃

〃No；　don't　be　in　a　hurry。　　I　have　something　else　to　say；　not　so
provoking。　　Do　you　know　the　arts　by　which　she　was　made　to　believe
you　wished　her　to　marry　again？〃

〃I　wished　her　to　marry　again！　　Are　you　mad；　uncle？〃

〃Whose　handwriting　is　on　this　envelope？〃

〃Mine；　to　be　sure。〃

〃Now；　read　the　letter。〃

Christopher　read　the　forged　letter。

〃Oh；　monstrous！〃

〃This　was　given　her　with　your　ruby　ring；　and　a　tale　so　artful　that
nothing　we　read　about　the　devil　comes　near　it。　　This　was　what　did
it。　　The　Earl　of　Tadcaster　brought　her　title；　and　wealth；　and
love。〃

〃What；　he　too！　　The　little　cub　I　saved；　and　lost　myself　forblank
him！　blank　him！〃

〃Why；　you　stupid　ninny！　you　forget　you　were　dead；　and　he　could　not
help　loving　her。　　How　could　he？　　Well；　but　you　see　she　refused　him。
And　why？　because　he　came　without　a　forged　letter　from　YOU。　　Do　you
doubt　her　love　for　you？〃

〃Of　course　I　do。　　She　never　loved　me　as　I　loved　her。〃

〃Christopher；　don't　you　say　that　before　me；　or　you　and　I　shall
quarrel。　　Poor　girl！　she　lay；　in　my　sight；　as　near　death　for　you　as
you　were　for　her。　　I'll　show　you　something。〃

He　went　to　a　cabinet；　and　took　out　a　silver　paper；　he　unpinned　it；
and　laid　Rosa's　beautiful　black　hair　upon　her　husband's　knees。
〃Look　at　that；　you　hard…hearted　brute！〃　he　roared　to　Christopher；
who　sat；　anything　but　hard…hearted；　his　eyes　filling　fast；　at　the
sad　proof　of　his　wife's　love　and　suffering。

Rosa　could　bear　no　more。　　She　came　out　with　her　boy　in　her　hand。
〃O　uncle；　do　not　speak　harshly　to　him；　or　you　will　kill　me　quite！〃

She　came　across　the　room；　a　picture　of　timidity　and　penitence；　with
her　whole　eloquent　body　bent　forward　at　an　angle。　　She　kneeled　at
his　knees；　with　streaming　eyes；　and　held　her　boy　up　to　him：　〃Plead
for　your　poor　mother；　my　darling。　　She　mourns　her　fault；　and　will
never　excuse　it。〃

The　cause　was　soon　decided。　　All　Philip's　logic　was　nothing；
compared　with　mighty　nature。　　Christopher　gave　one　great　sob；　and
took　his　darling　to　his　heart；　without　one　word；　and　he　and　Rosa
clung　together；　and　cried　over　each　other。　　Philip　slipped　out　of
the　room；　and　left　the　restored　ones　together。


I　have　something　more　to　say　about　my　hero　and　heroine；　but　must
first　deal　with　other　characters；　not　wholly　uninteresting　to　the
reader；　I　hope。

Dr。　Staines　directed　Phoebe　Falcon　how　to　treat　her　husband。　　No
medicine；　no　stimulants；　very　wholesome　food；　in　moderation；　and
the　temperature　of　the　body　regulated　by　tepid　water。　　Under　these
instructions；　the　injured　but　still　devoted　wife　was　the　real
healer。　　He　pulled　through；　but　was　lame　for　life；　and　ridiculously
lame；　for　he　went　with　a　spring　halt；a　sort　of　hop…and…go…one
that　made　the　girls　laugh；　and　vexed　Adonis。

Phoebe　found　the　diamonds；　and　offered　them　all　to　Staines；　in
expiation　of　his　villany。　　〃See；〃　she　said；　〃he　has　only　spent
one。〃

Staines　said　he　was　glad　of　it；　for　her　sake；　for　he　must　be　just
to　his　own　family。　　He　sold　them　for　three　thousand　two　hundred
pounds；　but　for　the　big　diamond　he　got　twelve　thousand　pounds；　and
I　believe　it　was　worth　double　the　money。

Counting　the　two　sums；　and　deducting　six　hundred　for　the　stone　Mr。
Falcon　had　embezzled；　he　gave　her　over　seven　thousand　pounds。

She　stared　at　him；　and　changed　color　at　so　large　a　sum。　　〃But　I
have　no　claim　on　that；　sir。〃

〃That　is　a　good　joke；〃　said　he。　　〃Why；　you　and　I　are　partners　in
the　whole　thingyou　and　I　and　Dick。　　Was　it　not　with　his　horse　and
rifle　I　bought　the　big　diamond？　　Poor　dear；　honest；　manly　Dick！
No；　the　money　is　honestly　yours；　Mrs。　Falcon；　but　don't　trust　a
penny　to　your　husband。〃

〃He　will　never　see　it；　sir。　　I　shall　take　him　back；　and　give　him
all　his　heart　can　ask　for；　with　this；　but　he　will　be　little　more
than　a　servant　in　the　house　now；　as　long　as　Dick　is　single；　I　know
that；〃　and　she　could　still　cry　at　the　humiliation　of　her　villain。

Staines　made　her　promise　to　write　to　him；　and　she　did　write　him　a
sweet；　womanly　letter；　to　say　that　they　were　making　an　enormous
fortune；　and　hoped　to　end　their　days　in　England。　　Dick　sent　his
kind　love　and　thanks。

I　will　add；　what　she　only　said　by　implication；　that　she　was　happy
after　all。　　She　still　contrived　to　love　the　thing　she　could　not
respect。　　Once；　when　an　officious　friend　pitied　her　for　her
husband's　lameness；　she　said；　〃Find　me　a　face　like　his。　　The　lamer
the　better；　he　can't　run　after　the　girls；　like　SOME。〃

Dr。　Staines　called　on　Lady　Cicely　Treherne；　the　footman　stared。　　He
left　his　card。

A　week　afterwards；　she　called　on　him。　　She　had　a　pink　tinge　in　her
cheeks；　a　general　animation；　and　her　face　full　of　brightness　and
archness。

〃Bless　me！〃　said　he　bluntly；　〃is　this　you？　　How　you　are　improved！〃

〃Yes；〃　said　she；　〃and　I　am　come　to　thank　you　for　your　pwescwiption：
I　followed　it　to　the　lettaa。〃

〃Woe　is　me！　　I　have　forgotten　it。〃

〃You　diwected　me　to　mawwy　a　nice　man。〃

〃Never：　I　hate　a　nice　man。〃

〃No；　noan　Iwishman：　and　I　have　done　it。〃

〃Good　gracious！　you　don't　mean　that！　　I　must　be　more　cautious　in　my
prescriptions。　　After　all；　it　seems　to　agree。〃

〃Admiwably。〃

〃He　loves　you？〃

〃To　distwaction。〃

〃He　amuses　you？〃

〃Pwodigiously。　　Come　and　see。〃


Dr。　and　Mrs。　Staines　live　with　Uncle　Philip。　　The　insurance　money
is　returned；　but　the　diamond　money　makes　them　very　easy。　　Staines
follows　his　profession　now　under　great　advantages：　a　noble　house；
rent　free；　the　curiosity　that　attaches　to　a　man　who　has　been　canted
out　of　a　ship　in　mid…ocean；　and　lives　to　tell　it；　and　then　Lord
Tadcaster；　married　into　another　noble　house；　swears　by　him；　and
talks　of　him；　so　does　Lady　Cicely　Munster；　late　Treherne；　and　when
such　friends　as　these　are　warm；　it　makes　a　physician　the　centre　of
an　important　clientele；　but　his　best　friend　of　all　is　his
unflagging　industry；　and　his　truly　wonderful　diagnosis；　which
resembles　divination。　　He　has　the　ball　at　his　feet；　and　above　all；
that　without　which　worldly　success　soon　palls；　a　happy　home；　a
fireside　warm　with　sympathy。

Mrs。　Staines　is　an　admiring；　sympathizing　wife；　and　an　admirable
housekeeper。　　She　still　utters　inadvertencies　now　and　then；　commits
new　errors　at　odd　times；　but　never　repeats　them　when　exposed。
Observing　which　docility；　Uncle　Philip　has　been　heard　to　express　a
fear　that；　in　twenty　years；　she　will　be　the　wisest　woman　in
England。　　〃But；　thank　heaven！〃　he　adds；　〃I　shall　be　gone　before
that。〃

Her　conduct　and　conversation　afford　this　cynic　constant　food　for
observation；　and　he　has　delivered　himself　oracularly　at　various
stages　of　the　study：　but　I　cannot　say　that　his　observations；　taken
as　a　whole；　present　that　consistency　which　entitles　them　to　be
regarded　as　a　body　of　philosophy。　　Examples：　　In　the　second　month
after　Mrs。　Staines　came　to　live　with　him；　he　delivered　himself
thus：　〃My　niece　Rosa　is　an　anomaly。　　She　gives　you　the　impression
she　is　shallow。　　Mind　your　eye：　in　one　moment　she　will　take　you　out
of　your　depth　or　any　man's　depth。　　She　is　like　those　country
streams　I　used　to　fish　for　pike　when　I　was　young；　you　go　along；
seeing　the　bottom　everywhere；　but　presently　you　come　to　a　corner；
and　it　is　fifteen　deep　all　in　a　moment；　and　souse　you　go　over　head
and　ears：　that's　my　niece　Rosa。〃

In　six　months　he　had　got　to　thisand；　mind　you；　each　successive
dogma　was　delivered　in　a　loud；　aggressive　tone；　and　in　sublime
oblivion　of　the　preceding　oracle〃My　niece　Rosa　is　the　most　artful
woman。　　（You　may　haw！　haw！　haw！　as　much　as　you　like。　　You　have　not
found　out　her　little　gameI　have。）　　What　is　the　aim　of　all　women？
To　be　beloved　by　an　unconscionable　number　of　people。　　Well；　she
sets　up　for　a　simpleton；　and　so　disarms　all　the　brilliant　people；
and　they　love　her。　　Everybody　loves　her。　　Just　you　put　her　down　in
a　room　with　six　clever　women；　and　you　will　see　who　is　the　favorite。
She　looks　as　shallow　as　a　pond；　and　she　is　as　deep　as　the　ocean。〃

At　the　end　of　the　year　he　threw　off　the　mask　altogether。　　〃The
great　sweetener　of　a　man's　life；〃　said　he；　〃is　'a　simpleton。'　　I
shall　not　go　abroad　any　more；　my　house　has　become　attractive：　I've
got　a　simpleton。　　When　I　have　a　headache；　her　eyes　fill　with　tender
concern；　and　she　hovers　about　me　and　pesters　me　with　pillows：　when
I　am　cross　with　her；　she　is　afraid　I　am　ill。　　When　I　die；　and　leave
her　a　lot　of　money；　she　will　howl　for　months；　and　say　I　don't　want
his　money：　'I　waw…waw…waw…waw…want　my　Uncle　Philip；　to　love　me；　and
scold　me。'　　One　day　she　told　me；　with　a　sigh；　I　hadn't　lectured　her
for　a　month。　　'I　am　afraid　I　have　offended　you；'　says　she；　'or　else
worn　you　out；　dear。'　　When　I　am　well；　give　me　a　simpleton；　to　make
me　laugh。　　When　I　am　ill；　give　me　a　simpleton　to　soothe　me　with　her
innocent　tenderness。　　A　simpleton　shall　wipe　the　dews　of　death；　and
close　my　eyes：　and　when　I　cross　the　river　of　death；　let　me　be　met
by　a　band　of　the　heavenly　host；　who　were　all　simpletons　here　on
earth；　and　too　good　for　such　a　hole；　so　now　they　are　in　heaven；　and
their　garments　always　whitebecause　there　are　no　laundresses　there。〃

Arrived　at　this　point；　the　Anglo…Saxon　race　will　retire；　grinning；
to　fresh　pastures；　and　leave　this　champion　of　〃a　Simpleton；〃　to
thunder　paradoxes　in　a　desert。





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