dream days-第2章

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Harold　was　somewhat　taken　aback。　　In　the　case　of　the　pig；　for

instance；　whose　last　outcry　had　now　passed　into　stillness；　he　had

considered　the　chapter　as　finally　closed。　　Whatever　innocent

mirth　the　holidays　might　hold　in　store　for　Edward；　that

particular　pig；　at　least；　would　not　be　a　contributor。　　And　now　he

was　given　to　understand　that　the　situation　had　not　materially

changed！　　He　would　have　to　revise　his　ideas；　it　seemed。　

Sitting　up　on　end；　he　looked　towards　the　garden　for　assistance　in

the　task。　　Thence；　even　as　he　gazed；　a　tiny　column　of　smoke　rose

straight　up　into　the　still　air。　　The　gardener　had　been　sweeping

that　afternoon；　and　now；　an　unconscious　priest；　was　offering　his

sacrifice　of　autumn　leaves　to　the　calm…eyed　goddess　of　changing

hues　and　chill　forebodings　who　was　moving　slowly　about　the　land

that　golden　afternoon。　　Harold　was　up　and　off　in　a　moment；

forgetting　Nelson；　forgetting　the　pig；　the　mole；　the　Larkin

betrayal；　and　Selina's　strange　fever　of　conscience。　　Here　was

fire；　real　fire；　to　play　with；　and　that　was　even　better　than

messing　with　water；　or　remodelling　the　plastic　surface　of　the

earth。　　Of　all　the　toys　the　world　provides　for　right…minded

persons；　the　original　elements　rank　easily　the　first。



But　Selina　sat　on　where　she　was；　her　chin　on　her　fists；　and

her　fancies　whirled　and　drifted；　here　and　there；　in　curls　and

eddies；　along　with　the　smoke　she　was　watching。　　As　the　quick…

footed　dusk　of　the　short　October　day　stepped　lightly　over　the

garden；　little　red　tongues　of　fire　might　be　seen　to　leap　and

vanish　in　the　smoke。　　Harold；　anon　staggering　under　armfuls　of

leaves；　anon　stoking　vigorously；　was　discernible　only　at　fitful

intervals。　　It　was　another　sort　of　smoke　that　the　inner　eye　of

Selina　was　looking　upon；a　smoke　that　hung　in　sullen　banks　round

the　masts　and　the　hulls　of　the　fighting　ships；　a　smoke　from

beneath　which　came　thunder　and　the　crash　and　the　splinter…rip；

the　shout　of　the　boarding　party；　the　choking　sob　of　the　gunner

stretched　by　his　gun；　a　smoke　from　out　of　which　at　last　she　saw；

as　through　a　riven　pall；　the　radiant　spirit　of　the　Victor；

crowned　with　the　coronal　of　a　perfect　death；　leap　in　full

assurance　up　into　the　ether　that　Immortals　breathe。　　The　dusk　was

glooming　towards　darkness　when　she　rose　and　moved　slowly　down

towards　the　beckoning　fire；　something　of　the　priestess　in　her

stride；　something　of　the　devotee　in　the　set　purpose　of　her　eye。



The　leaves　were　well　alight　by　this　time；　and　Harold　had　just

added　an　old　furze　bush；　which　flamed　and　crackled　stirringly。



〃Go　'n'　get　some　more　sticks；〃　ordered　Selina；　〃and　shavings；　'n'

chunks　of　wood；　'n'　anything　you　can　find。　　Look　herein　the

kitchen…garden　there's　a　pile　of　old　pea…sticks。　　Fetch　as　many

as　you　can　carry；　and　then　go　back　and　bring　some　more！〃



〃But　I　say；〃　began　Harold；　amazedly；　scarce　knowing　his　sister；

and　with　a　vision　of　a　frenzied　gardener；　pea…stickless　and

threatening　retribution。



〃Go　and　fetch　'em　quick！　〃　shouted　Selina；　stamping　with

impatience。



Harold　ran　off　at　once；　true　to　the　stern　system　of　discipline　in

which　he　had　been　nurtured。　　But　his　eyes　were　like　round　O's；

and　as　he　ran　he　talked　fast　to　himself；　in　evident　disorder　of

mind。



The　pea…sticks　made　a　rare　blaze；　and　the　fire；　no　longer

smouldering　sullenly；　leapt　up　and　began　to　assume　the　appearance

of　a　genuine　bonfire。　　Harold；　awed　into　silence　at　first；　began

to　jump　round　it　with　shouts　of　triumph。　　Selina　looked　on

grimly；　with　knitted　brow；　she　was　not　yet　fully　satisfied。　

〃Can't　you　get　any　more　sticks？〃　she　said　presently。　　〃Go　and

hunt　about。　　Get　some　old　hampers　and　matting　and　things　out　of

the　tool…house。　　Smash　up　that　old　cucumber　frame　Edward　shoved

you　into；　the　day　we　were　playing　scouts　and　Mohicans。　　Stop

a　bit！　　Hooray！　　I　know。　　You　come　along　with　me。〃



Hard　by　there　was　a　hot…house；　Aunt　Eliza's　special　pride　and

joy；　and　even　grimly　approved　of　by　the　gardener。　　At　one　end；　in

an　out…house　adjoining；　the　necessary　firing　was　stored；　and　to

this　sacred　fuel；　of　which　we　were　strictly　forbidden　to　touch　a

stick；　Selina　went　straight。　　Harold　followed　obediently；

prepared　for　any　crime　after　that　of　the　pea…sticks；　but　pinching

himself　to　see　if　he　were　really　awake。



〃You　bring　some　coals；〃　said　Selina　briefly；　without　any　palaver

or　pro…and…con　discussion。　　〃Here's　a　basket。　　I'LL　manage　the

faggots！〃



In　a　very　few　minutes　there　was　little　doubt　about　its　being　a

genuine　bonfire　and　no　paltry　makeshift。　　Selina；　a　Maenad　now；

hatless　and　tossing　disordered　locks；　all　the　dross　of　the　young

lady　purged　out　of　her；　stalked　around　the　pyre　of　her　own

purloining；　or　prodded　it　with　a　pea…stick。　　And　as　she　prodded

she　murmured　at　intervals；　〃I　KNEW　there　was　something　we

could　do！　　It　isn't　muchbut　still　it's　SOMETHING！〃



The　gardener　had　gone　home　to　his　tea。　　Aunt　Eliza　had　driven　out

for　hers　a　long　way　off；　and　was　not　expected　back　till　quite

late；　and　this　far　end　of　the　garden　was　not　overlooked　by　any

windows。　　So　the　Tribute　blazed　on　merrily　unchecked。　　Villagers

far　away；　catching　sight　of　the　flare；　muttered　something　about

〃them　young　devils　at　their　tricks　again；〃　and　trudged　on　beer…

wards。　　Never　a　thought　of　what　day　it　was；　never　a　thought　for

Nelson；　who　preserved　their　honest　pint…pots；　to　be　paid　for　in

honest　pence；　and　saved　them　from　litres　and　decimal　coinage。　

Nearer　at　hand；　frightened　rabbits　popped　up　and　vanished　with　a

flick　of　white　tails；　scared　birds　fluttered　among　the

branches；　or　sped　across　the　glade　to　quieter　sleeping…quarters；

but　never　a　bird　nor　a　beast　gave　a　thought　to　the　hero　to　whom

they　owed　it　that　each　year　their　little　homes　of　horsehair；

wool；　or　moss；　were　safe　stablished　'neath　the　flap　of　the

British　flag；　and　that　Game　Laws；　quietly　permanent；　made　la

chasse　a　terror　only　to　their　betters。　　No　one　seemed　to　know；

nor　to　care；　nor　to　sympathise。　　In　all　the　ecstasy　of　her　burnt…

offering　and　sacrifice；　Selina　stood　alone。



And　yetnot　quite　alone！　　For；　as　the　fire　was　roaring　at　its

best；　certain　stars　stepped　delicately　forth　on　the　surface　of

the　immensity　above；　and　peered　down　doubtfullywith　wonder　at

first；　then　with　interest；　then　with　recognition；　with　a　start　of

glad　surprise。　　THEY　at　least　knew　all　about　it；　THEY


understood。　　Among　THEM　the　Name　was　a　daily　familiar

word；　his　story　was　a　part　of　the　music　to　which　they　swung；

himself　was　their　fellow　and　their　mate　and　comrade。　　So　they

peeped；　and　winked；　and　peeped　again；　and　called　to　their　laggard

brothers　to　come　quick　and　see。





。　　　。　　　。　　　。　　　。　　　。　　　。



〃The　best　of　life　is　but　intoxication；〃　and　Selina；　who　during

her　brief　inebriation　had　lived　in　an　ecstasy　as　golden　as　our

drab　existence　affords；　had　to　experience　the　inevitable

bitterness　of　awakening　sobriety；　when　the　dying　down　of　the

flames　into　sullen　embers　coincided　with　the　frenzied　entrance　of

Aunt　Eliza　on　the　scene。　　It　was　not　so　much　that　she　was　at　once

and　forever　disrated；　broke；　sent　before　the　mast；　and　branded　as

one　on　whom　no　reliance　could　be　placed；　even　with　Edward　safe　at

school；　and　myself　under　the　distant　vigilance　of　an　aunt；　that

her　pocket　money　was　stopped　indefinitely；　and　her　new　Church

Service；　the　pride　of　her　last　birthday；　removed　from　her　own

custody　and　placed　under　the　control　of　a　Trust。　　She　sorrowed

rather　because　she　had　dragged　poor　Harold；　against　his　better

judgment；　into　a　most　horrible　scrape；　and　moreover　because；　when

the　reaction　had　fairly　set　in；　when　the　exaltation　had　fizzled

away　and　the　young…lady　portion　of　her　had　crept　timorously　back

to　its　wonted　lodging；　she　could　only　see　herself　as　a　plain

fool；　unjustified；　undeniable；　without　a　shadow　of　an　excuse　or

explanation。



As　for　Harold；　youth　and　a　short　memory　made　his　case　less

pitiful　than　it　seemed　to　his　more　sensitive　sister。　　True；　he

started　upstairs　to　his　lonely　cot　bellowing　dismally；　before　him

a　dreary　future　of　pains　and　penalties；　sufficient　to　last　to　the

crack　of　doom。　　Outside　his　door；　however；　he　tumbled　over

Augustus　the　cat；　and　made　capture　of　him；　and　at　once　his

mourning　was　changed　into　a　song　of　triumph；　as　he　conveyed　his

prize　into　port。　　For　Augustus；　who　detested　above　all　things

going　to　bed　with　little　boys；　was　ever　more　knave　than　fool；　and

the　trapper　who　was　wily　enough　to　ensnare　him　had　achieved

something　notable。　　Augustus；　when　he　realized　that　his　fate　was

sealed；　and　his　night's　lodging　settled；　wisely　made　the　best　of

things；　and　listened；　with　a　languorous　air　of　complete

comprehension；　to　the　incoherent　babble　concerning　pigs　and

heroes；　moles　and　bonfires；　which　served　Harold　for　a　self…sung

lullaby。　　Yet　it　may　be　doubted　whether　Augustus　was　one　of　those

rare　fellows　who　thoroughly　understood。



But　Selina　knew　no　more　of　this　source　of　consolation　than　of　the

sympathy　with　which　the　stars　were　winking　above　her；　and　it　was

only　after　some　sad　interval　oftime；　and　on　a　very　moist

pillow；　that　she　drifted　into　that　quaint　inconsequent　country

where　you　may　meet　your　own　pet　hero　strolling　down　the　road；　and

commit　what　hair…brained　oddities　you　like；　and　everybody

understands　and　appreciates。





DIES　IRAE



Those　memorable　days　that　move　in　procession；　their　heads　just

out　of　the　mist　of　years　long　deadthe　most　of　them　are　full…

eyed　as　the　dandelion　that　from　dawn　to　shade　has　steeped　itself

in　sunlight。　　Here　and　there　in　their　ranks；　however；　moves　a

forlorn　one　who　is　blindblind　in　the　sense　of　the　dulled

window…pane　on　which　the　pelting　raindrops　have　mingled　and　run

down；　obscuring　sunshine　and　the　circling　birds；　happy　fields；

and　storied　garden；　blind　with　the　spatter　of　a　misery

uncomprehended；　unanalysed；　only　felt　as　something　corporeal　in

its　buffeting　effects。



Martha　began　it；　and　yet　Martha　was　not　really　to　blame。　　Indeed；

that　was　half　the　trouble　of　itno　solid　person　stood　full

in　view；　to　be　blamed　and　to　make　atonement。　　There　was　only　a

wretched；　impalpable　condition　to　deal　with。　　Breakfast　was　just

over；　the　sun　was　summoning　us；　imperious　as　a　herald　with

clamour　of　trumpet；　I　ran　upstairs　to　her　with　a　broken　bootlace

in　my　hand；　and　there　she　was；　crying　in　a　corner；　her　head　in

her　apron。　　Nothing　could　be　got　from　her　but　the　same　dismal

succession　of　sobs　that　would　not　have　done；　that　struck　and　hurt

like　a　physical　beating；　and　meanwhile　the　sun　was　getting

impatient；　and　I　wanted　my　bootlace。



Inquiry　below　stairs　revealed　the　cause。　　Martha's　brother　was

dead；　it　seemedher　sailor　brother　Billy；　drowned　in　one　of

those　strange　far…off　seas　it　was　our　dream　to　navigate　one　day。　

We　had　known　Billy　well；　and　appreciated　him。　　When　an

approaching　visit　of　Billy　to　his　sister　had　been