dream days-第20章

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fellow　like　the　spotty　horse；　ready　to　step　in　at　critical

moments　and　take　up　just　the　part　required　of　him。



In　moments　of　mental　depression；　nothing　is　quite　so

consoling　as　the　honest　smell　of　a　painted　animal；　and

mechanically　I　turned　towards　the　shelf　that　had　been　so　long　the

Ararat　of　our　weather…beaten　Ark。　　The　shelf　was　empty；　the　Ark

had　cast　off　moorings　and　sailed　away　to　Poplar；　and　had　taken

with　it　its　haunting　smell；　as　well　as　that　pleasant　sense　of

disorder　that　the　best　conducted　Ark　is　always　able　to　impart。　

The　sliding　roof　had　rarely　been　known　to　close　entirely。　　There

was　always　a　pair　of　giraffe…legs　sticking　out；　or　an　elephant…

trunk；　taking　from　the　stiffness　of　its　outline；　and　reminding　us

that　our　motley　crowd　of　friends　inside　were　uncomfortably

cramped　for　room　and　only　too　ready　to　leap　in　a　cascade　on　the

floor　and　browse　and　gallop；　flutter　and　bellow　and　neigh；　and　be

their　natural　selves　again。　　I　think　that　none　of　us　ever　really

thought　very　much　of　Ham　and　Shem　and　Japhet。　　They　were　only

there　because　they　were　in　the　story；　but　nobody　really

wanted　them。　　The　Ark　was　built　for　the　animals；　of　course

animals　with　tails；　and　trunks；　and　horns；　and　at　least　three

legs　apiece；　though　some　unfortunates　had　been　unable　to　retain

even　that　number。　　And　in　the　animals　were　of　course　included　the

birdsthe　dove；　for　instance；　grey　with　black　wings；　and　the

red…crested　woodpeckeror　was　it　a　hoo…poe？and　the　insects；

for　there　was　a　dear　beetle；　about　the　same　size　as　the　dove；

that　held　its　own　with　any　of　the　mammalia。



Of　the　doll…department　Charlotte　had　naturally　been　sole　chief

for　a　long　time；　if　the　staff　were　not　in　their　places　to…day；　it

was　not　I　who　had　any　official　right　to　take　notice。　　And　yet　one

may　have　been　member　of　a　Club　for　many　a　year　without　ever

exactly　understanding　the　use　and　object　of　the　other　members；

until　one　enters；　some　Christmas　day　or　other　holiday；　and；

surveying　the　deserted　armchairs；　the　untenanted　sofas；　the

barren　hat…pegs；　realizes；　with　depression；　that　those　other

fellows　had　their　allotted　functions；　after　all。　　Where　was　old

Jerry？　　Where　were　Eugenie；　Rosa；　Sophy；　Esmeralda？　　We　had　long

drifted　apart；　it　was　true；　we　spoke　but　rarely；　perhaps；

absorbed　in　new　ambitions；　new　achievements；　I　had　even　come　to

look　down　on　these　conservative；　unprogressive　members　who　were

so　clearly　content　to　remain　simply　what　they　were。　　And　now　that

their　corners　were　unfilled；　their　chairs　unoccupiedwell；　my

eyes　were　opened　and　I　wanted　'em　back！



However；　it　was　no　business　of　mine。　　If　grievances　were　the

question；　I　hadn't　a　leg　to　stand　upon。　　Though　my　catapults　were

officially　confiscated；　I　knew　the　drawer　in　which　they　were

incarcerated；　and　where　the　key　of　it　was　hidden；　and　I

could　make　life　a　burden；　if　I　chose；　to　every　living　thing

within　a　square…mile　radius；　so　long　as　the　catapult　was　restored

to　its　drawer　in　due　and　decent　time。　　But　I　wondered　how　the

others　were　taking　it。　　The　edict　hit　them　more　severely。　　They

should　have　my　moral　countenance　at　any　rate；　if　not　more；　in　any

protest　or　countermine　they　might　be　planning。　　And；　indeed；

something　seemed　possible；　from　the　dogged；　sullen　air　with　which

the　two　of　them　had　trotted　off　in　the　direction　of　the

raspberry…canes。　　Certain　spots　always　had　their　insensible

attraction　for　certain　moods。　　In　love；　one　sought　the　orchard。　

Weary　of　discipline；　sick　of　convention；　impassioned　for　the

road；　the　mining　camp；　the　land　across　the　border；　one　made　for

the　big　meadow。　　Mutinous；　sulky；　charged　with　plots　and

conspiracies；　one　always　got　behind　the　shelter　of　the

raspberry…canes。





。　　　。　　　。　　　。　　　。　　　。　　　。



〃You　can　come　too　if　you　like；〃　said　Harold；　in　a　subdued　sort　of

way；　as　soon　as　he　was　aware　that　I　was　sitting　up　in　bed

watching　him。　　〃We　didn't　think　you'd　care；　'cos　you've　got　to

catapults。　　But　we're　goin'　to　do　what　we've　settled　to　do；　so

it's　no　good　sayin'　we　hadn't　ought　and　that　sort　of　thing；　'cos

we're　goin'　to！〃



The　day　had　passed　in　an　ominous　peacefulness。　　Charlotte　and

Harold　had　kept　out　of　my　way；　as　well　as　out　of　everybody

else's；　in　a　purposeful　manner　that　ought　to　have　bred　suspicion。



In　the　evening　we　had　read　books；　or　fitfully　drawn　ships　and

battles　on　fly…leaves；　apart；　in　separate　corners；　void　of

conversation　or　criticism；　oppressed　by　the　lowering　tidiness　of

the　universe；　till　bedtime　came；　and　disrobement；　and

prayers　even　more　mechanical　than　usual；　and　lastly　bed　itself

without　so　much　as　a　giraffe　under　the　pillow。　　Harold　had

grunted　himself　between　the　sheets　with　an　ostentatious　pretence

of　overpowering　fatigue；　but　I　noticed　that　he　pulled　his　pillow

forward　and　propped　his　head　against　the　brass　bars　of　his　crib；

and；　as　I　was　acquainted　with　most　of　his　tricks　and　subterfuges；

it　was　easy　for　me　to　gather　that　a　painful　wakefulness　was　his

aim　that　night。



I　had　dozed　off；　however；　and　Harold　was　out　and　on　his　feet；

poking　under　the　bed　for　his　shoes；　when　I　sat　up　and　grimly

regarded　him。　　Just　as　he　said　I　could　come　if　I　liked；　Charlotte

slipped　in；　her　face　rigid　and　set。　　And　then　it　was　borne　in

upon　me　that　I　was　not　on　in　this　scene。　　These　youngsters　had

planned　it　all　out；　the　piece　was　their　own；　and　the

mounting；　and　the　cast。　　My　sceptre　had　fallen；　my　rule　had

ceased。　　In　this　magic　hour　of　the　summer　night　laws　went　for

nothing；　codes　were　cancelled；　and　those　who　were　most　in　touch

with　the　moonlight　and　the　warm　June　spirit　and　the　topsy…

turvydom　that　reigns　when　the　clock　strikes　ten；　were　the　true

lords　and　lawmakers。



Humbly；　almost　timidly；　I　followed　without　a　protest　in　the　wake

of　these　two　remorseless；　purposeful　young　persons；　who　were

marching　straight　for　the　schoolroom。　　Here　in　the　moonlight　the

grim　big　box　stood　visiblethe　box　in　which　so　large　a　portion

of　our　past　and　our　personality　lay　entombed；　cold；　swathed　in

paper；　awaiting　the　carrier　of　the　morning　who　should　speed　them

forth　to　the　strange；　cold；　distant　Children's　Hospital；　where

their　little　failings　would　all　be　misunderstood　and　no　one

would　make　allowances。　　A　dreamy　spectator；　I　stood　idly　by

while　Harold　propped　up　the　lid　and　the　two　plunged　in　their　arms

and　probed　and　felt　and　grappled。



〃Here's　Rosa；〃　said　Harold；　suddenly。　　〃I　know　the　feel　of　her

hair。　　Will　you　have　Rosa　out？〃



〃Oh；　give　me　Rosa！〃　cried　Charlotte　with　a　sort　of　gasp。　　And

when　Rosa　had　been　dragged　forth；　quite　unmoved　apparently；

placid　as　ever　in　her　moonfaced　contemplation　of　this　comedy…

world　with　its　ups　and　downs；　Charlotte　retired　with　her　to　the

window…seat；　and　there　in　the　moonlight　the　two　exchanged　their

private　confidences；　leaving　Harold　to　his　exploration　alone。



〃Here's　something　with　sharp　corners；〃　said　Harold；　presently。　

〃Must　be　Leotard；　I　think。　　Better　let　HIM　go。〃



〃Oh；　yes；　we　can't　save　Leotard；〃　assented　Charlotte；

limply。



Poor　old　Leotard！　　I　said　nothing；　of　course；　I　was　not　on　in

this　piece。　　But；　surely；　had　Leotard　heard　and　rightly

understood　all　that　was　going　on　above　him；　he　must　have　sent　up

one　feeble；　strangled　cry；　one　faint　appeal　to　be　rescued　from

unfamiliar　little　Annies　and　retained　for　an　audience　certain　to

appreciate　and　never　unduly　critical。



〃Now　I've　got　to　the　Noah's　Ark；〃　panted　Harold；　still　groping

blindly。



〃Try　and　shove　the　lid　back　a　bit；〃　said　Charlotte；　〃and　pull　out

a　dove　or　a　zebra　or　a　giraffe　if　there's　one　handy。〃



Harold　toiled　on　with　grunts　and　contortions；　and　presently

produced　in　triumph　a　small　grey　elephant　and　a　large　beetle　with

a　red　stomach。



〃They're　jammed　in　too　tight；〃　he　complained。　　〃Can't　get　any

more　out。　　But　as　I　came　up　I'm　sure　I　felt　Potiphar！〃　　And　down

he　dived　again。



Potiphar　was　a　finely　modelled　bull　with　a　suede　skin；　rough

and　comfortable　and　warm　in　bed。　　He　was　my　own　special　joy　and

pride；　and　I　thrilled　with　honest　emotion　when　Potiphar　emerged

to　light　once　more；　stout…necked　and　stalwart　as　ever。



〃That'll　have　to　do；〃　said　Charlotte；　getting　up。　　〃We　dursn't

take　any　more；　'cos　we'll　be　found　out　if　we　do。　　Make　the　box

all　right；　and　bring　'em　along。〃



Harold　rammed　down　the　wads　of　paper　and　twists　of　straw　he　had

disturbed；　replaced　the　lid　squarely　and　innocently；　and　picked

up　his　small　salvage；　and　we　sneaked　off　for　the　window　most

generally　in　use　for　prison…breakings　and　nocturnal　escapades。　　A

few　seconds　later　and　we　were　hurrying　silently　in　single　file

along　the　dark　edge　of　the　lawn。



Oh；　the　riot；　the　clamour；　the　crowding　chorus；　of　all　silent

things　that　spoke　by　scent　and　colour　and　budding　thrust　and

foison；　that　moonlit　night　of　June！　　Under　the　laurel…shade　all

was　still　ghostly　enough；　brigand…haunted；　crackling；　whispering

of　night　and　all　its　possibilities　of　terror。　　But　the　open

garden；　when　once　we　were　in　ithow　it　turned　a　glad　new　face　to

welcome　us；　glad　as　of　old　when　the　sunlight　raked　and　searched

it；　new　with　the　unfamiliar　night…aspect　that　yet　welcomed　us　as

guests　to　a　hall　where　the　horns　blew　up　to　a　new；　strange

banquet！　　Was　this　the　same　grass；　could　these　be　the　same

familiar　flower…beds；　alleys；　clumps　of　verdure；　patches　of

sward？　　At　least　this　full　white　light　that　was　flooding　them　was

new；　and　accounted　for　all。　　It　was　Moonlight　Land；　and　Past…Ten…

o'clock　Land；　and　we　were　in　it　and　of　it；　and　all　its　other

denizens　fully　understood；　and；　tongue…free　and　awakened　at　last；

responded　and　comprehended　and　knew。　　The　other　two；　doubtless；

hurrying　forward　full　of　their　mission；　noted　little　of　all

this。　　I；　who　was　only　a　super；　had　leisure　to　take　it　all　in；

and；　though　the　language　and　the　message　of　the　land　were　not　all

clear　to　me　then；　long　afterwards　I　remembered　and　understood。



Under　the　farthest　hedge；　at　the　loose　end　of　things；　where　the

outer　world　began　with　the　paddock；　there　was　darkness　once

againnot　the　blackness　that　crouched　so　solidly　under　the

crowding　laurels；　but　a　duskiness　hung　from　far…spread　arms　of

high…standing　elms。　　There；　where　the　small　grave　made　a　darker

spot　on　the　grey；　I　overtook　them；　only　just　in　time　to　see　Rosa

laid　stiffly　out；　her　cherry　cheeks　pale　in　the　moonlight；　but

her　brave　smile　triumphant　and　undaunted　as　ever。　　It　was　a　tiny

grave　and　a　shallow　one；　to　hold　so　very　much。　　Rosa　once　in；

Potiphar；　who　had　hitherto　stood　erect；　stout…necked；　through　so

many　days　and　such　various　weather；　must　needs　bow　his　head

and　lie　down　meekly　on　his　side。　　The　elephant　and　the　beetle；

equal　now　in　a　silent　land　where　a　vertebra　and　a　red　circulation

counted　for　nothing；　had　to　snuggle　down　where　best　they　might；

only　a　little　less　crowded　than　in　their　native　Ark。



The　eart