for the term of his natural life-第35章

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to　strike　his　persecutors；　he　had　held　his　hand　now　that　an　unlooked…for　accident　had　placed　the　weapon　of　destruction　in　his　grasp。　　He　had　risked　his　life；　forgone　his　enmities；　almost　changed　his　natureand　his　reward　was　cold　looks　and　harsh　words；　so　soon　as　his　skill　had　paved　the　way　to　freedom。　　This　knowledge　coming　upon　him　while　the　thrill　of　exultation　at　the　astounding　news　of　his　riches　yet　vibrated　in　his　brain；　made　him　grind　his　teeth　with　rage　at　his　own　hard　fate。　　Bound　by　the　purest　and　holiest　of　tiesthe　affection　of　a　son　to　his　motherhe　had　condemned　himself　to　social　death；　rather　than　buy　his　liberty　and　life　by　a　revelation　which　would　shame　the　gentle　creature　whom　he　loved。　　By　a　strange　series　of　accidents；　fortune　had　assisted　him　to　maintain　the　deception　he　had　practised。　His　cousin　had　not　recognized　him。　　The　very　ship　in　which　he　was　believed　to　have　sailed　had　been　lost　with　every　soul　on　board。　　His　identity　had　been　completely　destroyedno　link　remained　which　could　connect　Rufus　Dawes；　the　convict；　with　Richard　Devine；　the　vanished　heir　to　the　wealth　of　the　dead　ship…builder。

Oh；　if　he　had　only　known！　　If；　while　in　the　gloomy　prison；　distracted　by　a　thousand　fears；　and　weighed　down　by　crushing　evidence　of　circumstance；　he　had　but　guessed　that　death　had　stepped　between　Sir　Richard　and　his　vengeance；　he　might　have　spared　himself　the　sacrifice　he　had　made。　　He　had　been　tried　and　condemned　as　a　nameless　sailor；　who　could　call　no　witnesses　in　his　defence；　and　give　no　particulars　as　to　his　previous　history。　　It　was　clear　to　him　now　that　he　might　have　adhered　to　his　statement　of　ignorance　concerning　the　murder；　locked　in　his　breast　the　name　of　the　murderer；　and　have　yet　been　free。　Judges　are　just；　but　popular　opinion　is　powerful；　and　it　was　not　impossible　that　Richard　Devine；　the　millionaire；　would　have　escaped　the　fate　which　had　overtaken　Rufus　Dawes；　the　sailor。　　Into　his　calculations　in　the　prisonwhen；　half…crazed　with　love；　with　terror；　and　despair；　he　had　counted　up　his　chances　of　lifethe　wild　supposition　that　he　had　even　then　inherited　the　wealth　of　the　father　who　had　disowned　him；　had　never　entered。　　The　knowledge　of　that　fact　would　have　altered　the　whole　current　of　his　life；　and　he　learnt　it　for　the　first　time　now　too　late。　　Now；　lying　prone　upon　the　sand；　now；　wandering　aimlessly　up　and　down　among　the　stunted　trees　that　bristled　white　beneath　the　mist…barred　moon；　now；　sittingas　he　had　sat　in　the　prison　long　ago　with　the　head　gripped　hard　between　his　hands；　swaying　his　body　to　and　fro；　he　thought　out　the　frightful　problem　of　his　bitter　life。　　Of　little　use　was　the　heritage　that　he　had　gained。　　A　convict…absconder；　whose　hands　were　hard　with　menial　service；　and　whose　back　was　scarred　with　the　lash；　could　never　be　received　among　the　gently　nurtured。　Let　him　lay　claim　to　his　name　and　rights；　what　then？　　He　was　a　convicted　felon；　and　his　name　and　rights　had　been　taken　from　him　by　the　law。　Let　him　go　and　tell　Maurice　Frere　that　he　was　his　lost　cousin。　He　would　be　laughed　at。　　Let　him　proclaim　aloud　his　birth　and　innocence；　and　the　convict…sheds　would　grin；　and　the　convict　overseer　set　him　to　harder　labour。　　Let　him　even；　by　dint　of　reiteration；　get　his　wild　story　believed；　what　would　happen？　　If　it　was　heard　in　England　after　the　lapse　of　years；　perhapsthat　a　convict　in　the　chain…gang　in　Macquarie　Harboura　man　held　to　be　a　murderer；　and　whose　convict　career　was　one　long　record　of　mutiny　and　punishmentclaimed　to　be　the　heir　to　an　English　fortune；　and　to　own　the　right　to　dispossess　staid　and　worthy　English　folk　of　their　rank　and　station；　with　what　feeling　would　the　announcement　be　received？　　Certainly　not　with　a　desire　to　redeem　this　ruffian　from　his　bonds　and　place　him　in　the　honoured　seat　of　his　dead　father。　　Such　intelligence　would　be　regarded　as　a　calamity；　an　unhappy　blot　upon　a　fair　reputation；　a　disgrace　to　an　honoured　and　unsullied　name。　　Let　him　succeed；　let　him　return　again　to　the　mother　who　had　by　this　time　become　reconciled；　in　a　measure；　to　his　loss；　he　would；　at　the　best；　be　to　her　a　living　shame；　scarcely　less　degrading　than　that　which　she　had　dreaded。

But　success　was　almost　impossible。　　He　did　not　dare　to　retrace　his　steps　through　the　hideous　labyrinth　into　which　he　had　plunged。　　Was　he　to　show　his　scarred　shoulders　as　a　proof　that　he　was　a　gentleman　and　an　innocent　man？　Was　he　to　relate　the　nameless　infamies　of　Macquarie　Harbour　as　a　proof　that　he　was　entitled　to　receive　the　hospitalities　of　the　generous；　and　to　sit；　a　respected　guest；　at　the　tables　of　men　of　refinement？　Was　he　to　quote　the　horrible　slang　of　the　prison…ship；　and　retail　the　filthy　jests　of　the　chain…gang　and　the　hulks；　as　a　proof　that　he　was　a　fit　companion　for　pure…minded　women　and　innocent　children？　Suppose　even　that　he　could　conceal　the　name　of　the　real　criminal；　and　show　himself　guiltless　of　the　crime　for　which　he　had　been　condemned；　all　the　wealth　in　the　world　could　not　buy　back　that　blissful　ignorance　of　evil　which　had　once　been　his。　　All　the　wealth　in　the　world　could　not　purchase　the　self…respect　which　had　been　cut　out　of　him　by　the　lash；　or　banish　from　his　brain　the　memory　of　his　degradation。

For　hours　this　agony　of　thought　racked　him。　　He　cried　out　as　though　with　physical　pain；　and　then　lay　in　a　stupor；　exhausted　with　actual　physical　suffering。　　It　was　hopeless　to　think　of　freedom　and　of　honour。　Let　him　keep　silence；　and　pursue　the　life　fate　had　marked　out　for　him。　He　would　return　to　bondage。　　The　law　would　claim　him　as　an　absconder；　and　would　mete　out　to　him　such　punishment　as　was　fitting。　Perhaps　he　might　escape　severest　punishment；　as　a　reward　for　his　exertions　in　saving　the　child。　　He　might　consider　himself　fortunate　if　such　was　permitted　to　him。　　Fortunate！　　Suppose　he　did　not　go　back　at　all；　but　wandered　away　into　the　wilderness　and　died？　　Better　death　than　such　a　doom　as　his。　Yet　need　he　die？　　He　had　caught　goats；　he　could　catch　fish。　He　could　build　a　hut。　　In　here　was；　perchance；　at　the　deserted　settlement　some　remnant　of　seed　corn　that；　planted；　would　give　him　bread。　He　had　built　a　boat；　he　had　made　an　oven；　he　had　fenced　in　a　hut。　Surely　he　could　contrive　to　live　alone　savage　and　free。　　Alone！　He　had　contrived　all　these　marvels　alone！　　Was　not　the　boat　he　himself　had　built　below　upon　the　shore？　　Why　not　escape　in　her；　and　leave　to　their　fate　the　miserable　creatures　who　had　treated　him　with　such　ingratitude？

The　idea　flashed　into　his　brain；　as　though　someone　had　spoken　the　words　into　his　ear。　　Twenty　strides　would　place　him　in　possession　of　the　boat；　and　half　an　hour's　drifting　with　the　current　would　take　him　beyond　pursuit。　Once　outside　the　Bar；　he　would　make　for　the　westward；　in　the　hopes　of　falling　in　with　some　whaler。　　He　would　doubtless　meet　with　one　before　many　days；　and　he　was　well　supplied　with　provision　and　water　in　the　meantime。　　A　tale　of　shipwreck　would　satisfy　the　sailors；　andhe　pausedhe　had　forgotten　that　the　rags　which　he　wore　would　betray　him。　With　an　exclamation　of　despair；　he　started　from　the　posture　in　which　he　was　lying。　　He　thrust　out　his　hands　to　raise　himself；　and　his　fingers　came　in　contact　with　something　soft。　　He　had　been　lying　at　the　foot　of　some　loose　stones　that　were　piled　cairnwise　beside　a　low…growing　bush；　and　the　object　that　he　had　touched　was　protruding　from　beneath　these　stones。　　He　caught　it　and　dragged　it　forth。　It　was　the　shirt　of　poor　Bates。　　With　trembling　hands　he　tore　away　the　stones；　and　pulled　forth　the　rest　of　the　garments。　　They　seemed　as　though　they　had　been　left　purposely　for　him。　　Heaven　had　sent　him　the　very　disguise　he　needed。

The　night　had　passed　during　his　reverie；　and　the　first　faint　streaks　of　dawn　began　to　lighten　in　the　sky。　　Haggard　and　pale；　he　rose　to　his　feet；　and　scarcely　daring　to　think　about　what　he　proposed　to　do；　ran　towards　the　boat。　　As　he　ran；　however；　the　voice　that　he　had　heard　encouraged　him。　　〃Your　life　is　of　more　importance　than　theirs。　They　will　die；　but　they　have　been　ungrateful　and　deserve　death。　You　will　escape　out　of　this　Hell；　and　return　to　the　loving　heart　who　mourns　you。　　You　can　do　more　good　to　mankind　than　by　saving　the　lives　of　these　people　who　despise　you。　　Moreover；　they　may　not　die。　They　are　sure　to　be　sent　for。　　Think　of　what　awaits　you　when　you　return　an　absconded　convict！〃

He　was　within　three　feet　of　the　boat；　when　he　suddenly　checked　himself；　and　stood　motionless；　staring　at　the　sand　with　as　much　horror　as　though　he　saw　there　the　Writing　which　foretold　the　doom　of　Belshazzar。　He　had　come　upon　the　sentence　traced　by　Sylvia　the　evening　before；　and　glittering　in　the　low　light　of　the　red　sun　suddenly　risen　from　out　the　sea；　it　seemed　to　him　that　the　letters　had　shaped　themselves　at　his　very　feet；

GOOD　MR。　DAWES。

〃Good　Mr。　Dawes〃！　　What　a　frightful　reproach　there　was　to　him　in　that　simple　sentence！　　What　a　world　of　cowardice；　baseness；　and　cruelty；　had　not　those　eleven　letters　opened　to　him！　　He　heard　the　voice　of　the　child　who　had　nursed　him；　calling　on　him　to　save　her。　　He　saw　her　at　that　instant　standing　between　him　and　the　boat；　as　she　had　stood　when　she　held　out　to　him　the　loaf；　on　the　night　of　his　return　to　the　settlement。

He　staggered　to　the　cavern；　and；　seizing　the　sleeping　Frere　by　the　arm；　shook　him　violently。　　〃Awake！　　awake！〃　he　cried；　〃and　let　us　leave　this　place！〃　Frere；　starting　to　his　feet；　looked　at　the　white　face　and　bloodshot　eyes　of　the　wretched　man　before　him　with　blunt　astonishment。　　〃What's　the　matter　with　you；　man？〃　he　said。　　〃You　look　as　if　you'd　seen　a　ghost！〃

At　the　sound　of　his　voice　Rufus　Dawes　gave　a　long　sigh；　and　drew　his　hand　across　his　eyes。

〃Come；　Sylvia！〃　shouted　Frere。　　〃It's　time　to　get　up。　　I　am　ready　to　go！〃

The　sacrifice　was　complete。　　The　convict　turned　away；　and　two　great　glistening　tears　rolled　down　his　rugged　face；　and　fell　upon　the　sand。




CHAPTER　XVII。

AT　SEA。



An　hour　after　sunrise；　the　frail　boat；　which　was　the　last　hope　of　these　four　human　beings；　drifted　with　the　outgoing　current　towards　the　mouth　of　the　harbour。　　When　first　launched　she　had　come　nigh　swamping；　being　overloaded；　and　it　was　found　necessary　to　leave　behind　a　great　portion　of　the　dried　meat。　　With　what　pangs　this　was　done　can　be　easily　imagined；　for　each　atom　of　food　seemed　to　represent　an　hour　of　life。　　Yet　there　was　no　help　for　it。　　As　Frere　said；　it　was　〃neck　or　nothing　with　them〃。　　They　must　get　away　at　all　hazards。

That　evening　they　camped　at　the　mouth　of　the　Gates；　Dawes　being　afraid　to　risk　a　passage　until　the　slack　of　the　tide；　and　about　ten　o'clock　at　night　adventured　to　cross　the　Bar。　　The　night　was　lovely；　and　the　sea　calm。　It　seemed　as　though　Providence　had　taken　pity　on　them；　for；　notwithstanding　the　insecurity　of　the　craft　and　the　violence　of　the　breakers；　the　dreaded　passage　was　made　with　safety。　　Once；　indeed；　when　they　had　just　entered　the　surf；　a　mighty　wave；　curling　high　above　them；　seemed　about　to　overwhelm　the　frail　structure　of　skins　and　wickerwork；　but　Rufus　Dawes；　keeping　the　nose　of　the　boat　to　the　sea；　and　Frere　baling　with　his　hat；　they　succeeded　in　reaching　deep　water。　A　great　misfortune；　however；　occurred。　　Two　of　the　bark　buckets；　left　by　some　unpardonable　oversight　uncleated；　were　washed　overboard；　and　with　them　nearly　a　fifth　of　th