lazy tour of two idle apprentices-第2章

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and　no　charge　for　advice；'　and　with　Doctor　Mantle's　'Laboratory　of

Medical；　Chemical；　and　Botanical　Science'　…　both　healing

institutions　established　on　one　pair　of　trestles；　one　board；　and

one　sun…blind。　　With　the　renowned　phrenologist　from　London；　begging

to　be　favoured　（at　sixpence　each）　with　the　company　of　clients　of

both　sexes；　to　whom；　on　examination　of　their　heads；　he　would　make

revelations　'enabling　him　or　her　to　know　themselves。'　　Through　all

these　bargains　and　blessings；　the　recruiting…sergeant　watchfully

elbowed　his　way；　a　thread　of　War　in　the　peaceful　skein。　　Likewise

on　the　walls　were　printed　hints　that　the　Oxford　Blues　might　not　be

indisposed　to　hear　of　a　few　fine　active　young　men；　and　that　whereas

the　standard　of　that　distinguished　corps　is　full　six　feet；　'growing

lads　of　five　feet　eleven'　need　not　absolutely　despair　of　being

accepted。



Scenting　the　morning　air　more　pleasantly　than　the　buried　majesty　of

Denmark　did；　Messrs。　Idle　and　Goodchild　rode　away　from　Carlisle　at

eight　o'clock　one　forenoon；　bound　for　the　village　of　Hesket；

Newmarket；　some　fourteen　miles　distant。　　Goodchild　（who　had　already

begun　to　doubt　whether　he　was　idle：　　as　his　way　always　is　when　he

has　nothing　to　do）　had　read　of　a　certain　black　old　Cumberland　hill

or　mountain；　called　Carrock；　or　Carrock　Fell；　and　had　arrived　at

the　conclusion　that　it　would　be　the　culminating　triumph　of　Idleness

to　ascend　the　same。　　Thomas　Idle；　dwelling　on　the　pains　inseparable

from　that　achievement；　had　expressed　the　strongest　doubts　of　the

expediency；　and　even　of　the　sanity；　of　the　enterprise；　but

Goodchild　had　carried　his　point；　and　they　rode　away。



Up　hill　and　down　hill；　and　twisting　to　the　right；　and　twisting　to

the　left；　and　with　old　Skiddaw　（who　has　vaunted　himself　a　great

deal　more　than　his　merits　deserve；　but　that　is　rather　the　way　of

the　Lake　country）；　dodging　the　apprentices　in　a　picturesque　and

pleasant　manner。　　Good；　weather…proof；　warm；　pleasant　houses；　well

white…limed；　scantily　dotting　the　road。　　Clean　children　coming　out

to　look；　carrying　other　clean　children　as　big　as　themselves。

Harvest　still　lying　out　and　much　rained　upon；　here　and　there；

harvest　still　unreaped。　　Well…cultivated　gardens　attached　to　the

cottages；　with　plenty　of　produce　forced　out　of　their　hard　soil。

Lonely　nooks；　and　wild；　but　people　can　be　born；　and　married；　and

buried　in　such　nooks；　and　can　live　and　love；　and　be　loved；　there　as

elsewhere；　thank　God！　（Mr。　Goodchild's　remark。）　　By…and…by；　the

village。　　Black；　coarse…stoned；　rough…windowed　houses；　some　with

outer　staircases；　like　Swiss　houses；　a　sinuous　and　stony　gutter

winding　up　hill　and　round　the　corner；　by　way　of　street。　　All　the

children　running　out　directly。　　Women　pausing　in　washing；　to　peep

from　doorways　and　very　little　windows。　　Such　were　the　observations

of　Messrs。　Idle　and　Goodchild；　as　their　conveyance　stopped　at　the

village　shoemaker's。　　Old　Carrock　gloomed　down　upon　it　all　in　a

very　ill…tempered　state；　and　rain　was　beginning。



The　village　shoemaker　declined　to　have　anything　to　do　with　Carrock。

No　visitors　went　up　Carrock。　　No　visitors　came　there　at　all。　　Aa'

the　world　ganged　awa'　yon。　　The　driver　appealed　to　the　Innkeeper。

The　Innkeeper　had　two　men　working　in　the　fields；　and　one　of　them

should　be　called　in；　to　go　up　Carrock　as　guide。　　Messrs。　Idle　and

Goodchild；　highly　approving；　entered　the　Innkeeper's　house；　to

drink　whiskey　and　eat　oatcake。



The　Innkeeper　was　not　idle　enough　…　was　not　idle　at　all；　which　was

a　great　fault　in　him　…　but　was　a　fine　specimen　of　a　north…country

man；　or　any　kind　of　man。　　He　had　a　ruddy　cheek；　a　bright　eye；　a

well…knit　frame；　an　immense　hand；　a　cheery；　outspeaking　voice；　and

a　straight；　bright；　broad　look。　　He　had　a　drawing…room；　too；

upstairs；　which　was　worth　a　visit　to　the　Cumberland　Fells。　　（This

was　Mr。　Francis　Goodchild's　opinion；　in　which　Mr。　Thomas　Idle　did

not　concur。）



The　ceiling　of　this　drawing…room　was　so　crossed　and　recrossed　by

beams　of　unequal　lengths；　radiating　from　a　centre；　in　a　corner；

that　it　looked　like　a　broken　star…fish。　　The　room　was　comfortably

and　solidly　furnished　with　good　mahogany　and　horsehair。　　It　had　a

snug　fireside；　and　a　couple　of　well…curtained　windows；　looking　out

upon　the　wild　country　behind　the　house。　　What　it　most　developed

was；　an　unexpected　taste　for　little　ornaments　and　nick…nacks；　of

which　it　contained　a　most　surprising　number。　　They　were　not　very

various；　consisting　in　great　part　of　waxen　babies　with　their　limbs

more　or　less　mutilated；　appealing　on　one　leg　to　the　parental

affections　from　under　little　cupping　glasses；　but；　Uncle　Tom　was

there；　in　crockery；　receiving　theological　instructions　from　Miss

Eva；　who　grew　out　of　his　side　like　a　wen；　in　an　exceedingly　rough

state　of　profile　propagandism。　　Engravings　of　Mr。　Hunt's　country

boy；　before　and　after　his　pie；　were　on　the　wall；　divided　by　a

highly…coloured　nautical　piece；　the　subject　of　which　had　all　her

colours　（and　more）　flying；　and　was　making　great　way　through　a　sea

of　a　regular　pattern；　like　a　lady's　collar。　　A　benevolent；　elderly

gentleman　of　the　last　century；　with　a　powdered　head；　kept　guard；　in

oil　and　varnish；　over　a　most　perplexing　piece　of　furniture　on　a

table；　in　appearance　between　a　driving　seat　and　an　angular　knife…

box；　but；　when　opened；　a　musical　instrument　of　tinkling　wires；

exactly　like　David's　harp　packed　for　travelling。　　Everything　became

a　nick…nack　in　this　curious　room。　　The　copper　tea…kettle；　burnished

up　to　the　highest　point　of　glory；　took　his　station　on　a　stand　of

his　own　at　the　greatest　possible　distance　from　the　fireplace；　and

said：　　'By　your　leave；　not　a　kettle；　but　a　bijou。'　　The

Staffordshire…ware　butter…dish　with　the　cover　on；　got　upon　a　little

round　occasional　table　in　a　window；　with　a　worked　top；　and

announced　itself　to　the　two　chairs　accidentally　placed　there；　as　an

aid　to　polite　conversation；　a　graceful　trifle　in　china　to　be

chatted　over　by　callers；　as　they　airily　trifled　away　the　visiting

moments　of　a　butterfly　existence；　in　that　rugged　old　village　on　the

Cumberland　Fells。　　The　very　footstool　could　not　keep　the　floor；　but

got　upon　a　sofa；　and　there…from　proclaimed　itself；　in　high　relief

of　white　and　liver…coloured　wool；　a　favourite　spaniel　coiled　up　for

repose。　　Though；　truly；　in　spite　of　its　bright　glass　eyes；　the

spaniel　was　the　least　successful　assumption　in　the　collection：

being　perfectly　flat；　and　dismally　suggestive　of　a　recent　mistake

in　sitting　down　on　the　part　of　some　corpulent　member　of　the　family。



There　were　books；　too；　in　this　room；　books　on　the　table；　books　on

the　chimney…piece；　books　in　an　open　press　in　the　corner。　　Fielding

was　there；　and　Smollett　was　there；　and　Steele　and　Addison　were

there；　in　dispersed　volumes；　and　there　were　tales　of　those　who　go

down　to　the　sea　in　ships；　for　windy　nights；　and　there　was　really　a

choice　of　good　books　for　rainy　days　or　fine。　　It　was　so　very

pleasant　to　see　these　things　in　such　a　lonesome　by…place　…　so　very

agreeable　to　find　these　evidences　of　a　taste；　however　homely；　that

went　beyond　the　beautiful　cleanliness　and　trimness　of　the　house　…

so　fanciful　to　imagine　what　a　wonder　a　room　must　be　to　the　little

children　born　in　the　gloomy　village　…　what　grand　impressions　of　it

those　of　them　who　became　wanderers　over　the　earth　would　carry　away；

and　how；　at　distant　ends　of　the　world；　some　old　voyagers　would　die；

cherishing　the　belief　that　the　finest　apartment　known　to　men　was

once　in　the　Hesket…Newmarket　Inn；　in　rare　old　Cumberland　…　it　was

such　a　charmingly　lazy　pursuit　to　entertain　these　rambling　thoughts

over　the　choice　oatcake　and　the　genial　whiskey；　that　Mr。　Idle　and

Mr。　Goodchild　never　asked　themselves　how　it　came　to　pass　that　the

men　in　the　fields　were　never　heard　of　more；　how　the　stalwart

landlord　replaced　them　without　explanation；　how　his　dog…cart　came

to　be　waiting　at　the　door；　and　how　everything　was　arranged　without

the　least　arrangement　for　climbing　to　old　Carrock's　shoulders；　and

standing　on　his　head。



Without　a　word　of　inquiry；　therefore；　the　Two　Idle　Apprentices

drifted　out　resignedly　into　a　fine；　soft；　close；　drowsy；

penetrating　rain；　got　into　the　landlord's　light　dog…cart；　and

rattled　off　through　the　village　for　the　foot　of　Carrock。　　The

journey　at　the　outset　was　not　remarkable。　　The　Cumberland　road　went

up　and　down　like　all　other　roads；　the　Cumberland　curs　burst　out

from　backs　of　cottages　and　barked　like　other　curs；　and　the

Cumberland　peasantry　stared　after　the　dog…cart　amazedly；　as　long　as

it　was　in　sight；　like　the　rest　of　their　race。　　The　approach　to　the

foot　of　the　mountain　resembled　the　approaches　to　the　feet　of　most

other　mountains　all　over　the　world。　　The　cultivation　gradually

ceased；　the　trees　grew　gradually　rare；　the　road　became　gradually

rougher；　and　the　sides　of　the　mountain　looked　gradually　more　and

more　lofty；　and　more　and　more　difficult　to　get　up。　　The　dog…cart

was　left　at　a　lonely　farm…house。　　The　landlord　borrowed　a　large

umbrella；　and；　assuming　in　an　instant　the　character　of　the　most

cheerful　and　adventurous　of　guides；　led　the　way　to　the　ascent。　　Mr。

Goodchild　looked　eagerly　at　the　top　of　the　mountain；　and；　feeling

apparently　that　he　was　now　going　to　be　very　lazy　indeed；　shone　all

over　wonderfully　to　the　eye；　under　the　influence　of　the　contentment

within　and　the　moisture　without。　　Only　in　the　bosom　of　Mr。　Thomas

Idle　did　Despondency　now　hold　her　gloomy　state。　　He　kept　it　a

secret；　but　he　would　have　given　a　very　handsome　sum；　when　the

ascent　began；　to　have　been　back　again　at　the　inn。　　The　sides　of

Carrock　looked　fearfully　steep；　and　the　top　of　Carrock　was　hidden

in　mist。　　The　rain　was　falling　faster　and　faster。　　The　knees　of　Mr。

Idle　…　always　weak　on　walking　excursions　…　shivered　and　shook　with

fear　and　damp。　　The　wet　was　already　penetrating　through　the　young

man's　outer　coat　to　a　brand…new　shooting…jacket；　for　which　he　had

reluctantly　paid　the　large　sum　of　two　guineas　on　leaving　town；　he

had　no　stimulating　refreshment　about　him　but　a　small　packet　of

clammy　gingerbread　nuts；　he　had　nobody　to　give　him　an　arm；　nobody

to　push　him　gently　behind；　nobody　to　pull　him　up　tenderly　in　front；

nobody　to　speak　to　who　really　felt　the　difficulties　of　the　ascent；

the　dampness　of　the　rain；　the　denseness　of　the　mist；　and　the

unutterable　folly　of　climbing；　undriven；　up　any　steep　place　in　the

world；　when　there　is　level　ground　within　reach　to　walk　on　instead。

Was　it　for　this　that　Thomas　had　left　London？　　London；　where　there

are　nice　short　walks　in　level　public　gardens；　with　benches　of

repose　set　up　at　convenient　distances　for　weary　travellers　…

London；　where　rugged　stone　is　humanely　pounded　into　little　lumps

for　the　road；　and　intelligently　shaped　into　smooth　slabs　for　the

pavement！　　No！　it　was　not　for　the　laborious　ascent　of　the　crags　of

Carrock　that　Idle　had　left　his　native　city；　and　travelled　to

Cumberland。　　Never