misc writings and speeches(米斯克说与写)-第31章
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held intercourse with beings of another world。 I solemnly declare;
therefore; that I never saw a ghost; like Lord Lyttleton; consulted a gipsy;
like Josephine; or heard my name pronounced by an absent person; like Dr
Johnson。 Though it is now almost as usual for gentlemen to appear at the
moment of their death to their friends as to call on them during their life;
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none of my acquaintance have been so polite as to pay me that customary
attention。 I have derived my knowledge neither from the dead nor from
the living; neither from the lines of a hand; nor from the grounds of a tea…
cup; neither from the stars of the firmament; nor from the fiends of the
abyss。 I have never; like the Wesley family; heard 〃that mighty leading
angel;〃 who 〃drew after him the third part of heaven's sons;〃 scratching in
my cupboard。 I have never been enticed to sign any of those delusive
bonds which have been the ruin of so many poor creatures; and; having
always been an indifferent horse man; I have been careful not to venture
myself on a broomstick。
My insight into futurity; like that of George Fox the quaker; and that of
our great and philosophic poet; Lord Byron; is derived from simple
presentiment。 This is a far less artificial process than those which are
employed by some others。 Yet my predictions will; I believe; be found
more correct than theirs; or; at all events; as Sir Benjamin Back bite says
in the play; 〃more circumstantial。〃
I prophesy then; that; in the year 2824; according to our present
reckoning; a grand national Epic Poem; worthy to be compared with the
Iliad; the Aeneid; or the Jerusalem; will be published in London。
Men naturally take an interest in the adventures of every eminent
writer。 I will; therefore; gratify the laudable curiosity; which; on this
occasion; will doubtless be universal; by pre fixing to my account of the
poem a concise memoir of the poet。
Richard Quongti will be born at Westminster on the 1st of July; 2786。
He will be the younger son of the younger branch of one of the most
respectable families in England。 He will be linearly descended from
Quongti; the famous Chinese liberal; who; after the failure of the heroic
attempt of his party to obtain a constitution from the Emperor Fim Fam;
will take refuge in England; in the twenty…third century。 Here his
descendants will obtain considerable note; and one branch of the family
will be raised to the peerage。
Richard; however; though destined to exalt his family to distinction far
nobler than any which wealth or titles can bestow; will be born to a very
scanty fortune。 He will display in his early youth such striking talents as
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will attract the notice of Viscount Quongti; his third cousin; then secretary
of state for the Steam Department。 At the expense of this eminent
nobleman; he will be sent to prosecute his studies at the university of
Tombuctoo。 To that illustrious seat of the muses all the ingenuous youth
of every country will then be attracted by the high scientific character of
Professor Quashaboo; and the eminent literary attainments of Professor
Kissey Kickey。 In spite of this formidable competition; however;
Quongti will acquire the highest honours in every department of
knowledge; and will obtain the esteem of his associates by his amiable and
unaffected manners。 The guardians of the young Duke of Carrington;
premier peer of England; and the last remaining scion of the ancient and
illustrious house of Smith; will be desirous to secure so able an instructor
for their ward。 With the Duke; Quongti will perform the grand tour; and
visit the polished courts of Sydney and Capetown。 After prevailing on
his pupil; with great difficulty; to subdue a violent and imprudent passion
which he had conceived for a Hottentot lady; of great beauty and
accomplishments indeed; but of dubious character; he will travel with him
to the United States of America。 But that tremendous war which will be
fatal to American liberty will; at that time; be raging through the whole
federation。 At New York the travellers will hear of the final defeat and
death of the illustrious champion of freedom; Jonathon Higginbottom; and
of the elevation of Ebenezer Hogsflesh to the perpetual Presidency。 They
will not choose to proceed in a journey which would expose them to the
insults of that brutal soldiery; whose cruelty and rapacity will have
devastated Mexico and Colombia; and now; at length; enslaved their own
country。
On their return to England; A。D。 2810; the death of the Duke will
compel his preceptor to seek for a subsistence by literary labours。 His
fame will be raised by many small productions of considerable merit; and
he will at last obtain a permanent place in the highest class of writers by
his great epic poem。
The celebrated work will become; with unexampled rapidity; a popular
favourite。 The sale will be so beneficial to the author that; instead of
going about the dirty streets on his velocipede; he will be enabled to set up
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his balloon。
The character of this noble poem will be so finely and justly given in
the Tombuctoo Review for April 2825; that I cannot refrain from
translating the passage。 The author will be our poet's old preceptor;
Professor Kissey Kickey。
〃In pathos; in splendour of language; in sweetness of versification; Mr
Quongti has long been considered as unrivalled。 In his exquisite poem on
the Ornithorhynchus Paradoxus all these qualities are displayed in their
greatest perfection。 How exquisitely does that work arrest and embody
the undefined and vague shadows which flit over an imaginative mind。
The cold worldling may not comprehend it; but it will find a response in
the bosom of every youthful poet; of every enthusiastic lover; who has
seen an Ornithorhynchus Paradoxus by moonlight。 But we were yet to
learn that he possessed the comprehension; the judgment; and the fertility
of mind indispensable to the epic poet。
〃It is difficult to conceive a plot more perfect than that of the
'Wellingtoniad。' It is most faithful to the manners of the age to which it
relates。 It preserves exactly all the historical circumstances; and
interweaves them most artfully with all the speciosa miracula of
supernatural agency。〃
Thus far the learned Professor of Humanity in the university of
Tombuctoo。 I fear that the critics of our time will form an opinion
diametrically opposite as to these every points。 Some will; I fear; be
disgusted by the machinery; which is derived from the mythology of
ancient Greece。 I can only say that; in the twenty…ninth century; that
machinery will be universally in use among poets; and that Quongti will
use it; partly in conformity with the general practice; and partly from a
veneration; perhaps excessive; for the great remains of classical antiquity;
which will then; as now; be assiduously read by every man of education;
though Tom Moore's songs will be forgotten; and only three copies of
Lord Byron's works will exist: one in the possession of King George the
Nineteenth; one in the Duke of Carrington's collection; and one in the
library of the British Museum。 Finally; should any good people be
concerned to hear that Pagan fictions will so long retain their influence
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over literature; let them reflect that; as the Bishop of St David's says; in his
〃Proofs of the Inspiration of the Sibylline Verses;〃 read at the last meeting
of the Royal Society of Literature; 〃at all events; a Pagan is not a Papist。〃
Some readers of the present day may think that Quongti is by no
means entitled to the compliments which his Negro critic pays him on his
adherence to the historical circumstances of the time in which he has
chosen his subject; that; where he introduces any trait of our manners; it is
in the wrong place; and that he confounds the customs of our age with
those of much more remote periods。 I can only say that the charge is
infinitely more applicable to Homer; Virgil; and Tasso。 If; therefore; the
reader should detect; in the following abstract of the plot; any little
deviation from strict historical accuracy; let him reflect; for a moment;
whether Agamemnon would not have found as much to censure in the
Iliad;Dido in the Aeneid;or Godfrey in the Jerusalem。 Let him not
suffer his opinions to depend on circumstances which cannot possibly
affect the truth or falsehood of the representation。 If it be impossible for
a single man to kill hundreds in battle; the impossibility is not diminished
by distance of time。 If it be as certain that Rinaldo never disenchanted a
forest in Palestine as it is that the Duke of Wellington never disenchanted
the forest of Soignies; can we; as rational men; tolerate the one story and
ridicule the other? Of this; at least; I am certain; that whatever excuse we
have for admiri