latter-day pamphlets-第26章

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her　upon　the　popular　vertexes；　and　act　that　sorry　character；　〃carcass　of　the　drowned　ass　upon　the　mud…deluge〃？　is　by　no　means　an　important　one　for　almost　anybody；hardly　even　for　the　drowned　ass　himself。　　Such　drowned　ass　ought　to　ask　himself；　If　the　function　is　a　sublime　one？　　For　him　too；　though　he　looks　sublime　to　the　vulgar　and　floats　atop；　a　private　situation；　down　out　of　sight　in　his　natural　ooze；　would　be　a　luckier　one。

Crabbe；　speaking　of　constitutional　philosophies；　faith　in　the　ballot…box　and　such　like；　has　this　indignant　passage：　　〃If　any　voice　of　deliverance　or　resuscitation　reach　us；　in　this　our　low　and　all　but　lost　estate；　sunk　almost　beyond　plummet's　sounding　in　the　mud　of　Lethe；　and　oblivious　of　all　noble　objects；　it　will　be　an　intimation　that　we　must　put　away　all　this　abominable　nonsense；　and　understand；　once　more；　that　Constituted　Anarchy；　with　however　many　ballot…boxes；　caucuses；　and　hustings　beer…barrels；　is　a　continual　offence　to　gods　and　men。　　That　to　be　governed　by　small　men　is　not　only　a　misfortune；　but　it　is　a　curse　and　a　sin；　the　effect；　and　alas　the　cause　also；　of　all　manner　of　curses　and　sins。　　That　to　profess　subjection　to　phantasms；　and　pretend　to　accept　guidance　from　fractional　parts　of　tailors；　is　what　Smelfungus　in　his　rude　dialect　calls　it；　'a　damned　_lie_；'　and　nothing　other。　　A　lie　which；　by　long　use　and　wont；　we　have　grown　accustomed　to；　and　do　not　the　least　feel　to　be　a　lie；　having　spoken　and　done　it　continually　everywhere　for　such　a　long　time　past；but　has　Nature　grown　to　accept　it　as　a　veracity；　think　you；　my　friend？　　Have　the　Parcae　fallen　asleep；　because　you　wanted　to　make　money　in　the　City？　　Nature　at　all　moments　knows　well　that　it　is　a　lie；　and　that；　like　all　lies；　it　is　cursed　and　damned　from　the　beginning。

〃Even　so；　ye　indigent　millionnaires；　and　miserable　bankrupt　populations　rolling　in　gold；whose　note…of…hand　will　go　to　any　length　in　Threadneedle　Street；　and　to　whom　in　Heaven's　Bank　the　stern　answer　is；　'No　effects！'　Bankrupt；　I　say；　and　Californias　and　Eldorados　will　not　save　us。　　And　every　time　we　speak　such　lie；　or　do　it　or　look　it；　as　we　have　been　incessantly　doing；　and　many　of　us　with　clear　consciousness；　for　about　a　hundred　and　fifty　years　now；　Nature　marks　down　the　exact　penalty　against　us。　　'Debtor　to　so　much　lying：　　forfeiture　of　existing　stock　of　worth　to　such　extent；approach　to　general　damnation　by　so　much。'　　Till　now；　as　we　look　round　us　over　a　convulsed　anarchic　Europe；　and　at　home　over　an　anarchy　not　yet　convulsed；　but　only　heaving　towards　convulsion；　and　to　judge　by　the　Mosaic　sweating…establishments；　cannibal　Connaughts　and　other　symptoms；　not　far　from　convulsion　now；　we　seem　to　have　pretty　much　_exhausted_　our　accumulated　stock　of　worth；　and　unless　money's　'worth'　and　bullion　at　the　Bank　will　save　us；　to　be　rubbing　very　close　upon　that　ulterior　bourn　which　I　do　not　like　to　name　again！

〃On　behalf　of　nearly　twenty…seven　millions　of　my　fellow…countrymen；　sunk　deep　in　Lethean　sleep；　with　mere　owl…dreams　of　Political　Economy　and　mice…catching；　in　this　pacific　thrice…infernal　slush…element；　and　also　of　certain　select　thousands；　and　hundreds　and　units；　awakened　or　beginning　to　awaken　from　it；　and　with　horror　in　their　hearts　perceiving　where　they　are；　I　beg　to　protest；　and　in　the　name　of　God　to　say；　with　poor　human　ink；　desirous　much　that　I　had　divine　thunder　to　say　it　with；　Awake；　arise；before　you　sink　to　death　eternal！　　Unnamable　destruction；　and　banishment　to　Houndsditch　and　Gehenna；　lies　in　store　for　all　Nations　that；　in　angry　perversity　or　brutal　torpor　and　owlish　blindness；　neglect　the　eternal　message　of　the　gods；　and　vote　for　the　Worse　while　the　Better　is　there。　　Like　owls　they　say；　'Barabbas　will　do；　any　orthodox　Hebrew　of　the　Hebrews；　and　peaceable　believer　in　M'Croudy　and　the　Faith　of　Leave…alone　will　do：　　the　Right　Honorable　Minimus　is　well　enough；　he　shall　be　our　Maximus；　under　him　it　will　be　handy　to　catch　mice；　and　Owldom　shall　continue　a　flourishing　empire。　'〃


One　thing　is　undeniable；　and　must　be　continually　repeated　till　it　get　to　be　understood　again：　　Of　all　constitutions；　forms　of　government；　and　political　methods　among　men；　the　question　to　be　asked　is　even　this；　What　kind　of　man　do　you　set　over　us？　　All　questions　are　answered　in　the　answer　to　this。　Another　thing　is　worth　attending　to：　　No　people　or　populace；　with　never　such　ballot…boxes；　can　select　such　man　for　you；　only　the　man　of　worth　can　recognize　worth　in　men；to　the　commonplace　man　of　no　or　of　little　worth；　you；　unless　you　wish　to　be　_mis_led；　need　not　apply　on　such　an　occasion。　Those　poor　Tenpound　Franchisers　of　yours；　they　are　not　even　in　earnest；　the　poor　sniffing　sniggering　Honorable　Gentlemen　they　send　to　Parliament　are　as　little　so。　　Tenpound　Franchisers　full　of　mere　beer　and　balderdash；　Honorable　Gentlemen　come　to　Parliament　as　to　an　Almack's　series　of　evening　parties；　or　big　cockmain　（battle　of　all　the　cocks）　very　amusing　to　witness　and　bet　upon：　　what　can　or　could　men　in　that　predicament　ever　do　for　you？　Nay；　if　they　were　in　life…and…death　earnest；　what　could　it　avail　you　in　such　a　case？　　I　tell　you；　a　million　blockheads　looking　authoritatively　into　one　man　of　what　you　call　genius；　or　noble　sense；　will　make　nothing　but　nonsense　out　of　him　and　his　qualities；　and　his　virtues　and　defects；　if　they　look　till　the　end　of　time。　　He　understands　them；　sees　what　they　are；　but　that　they　should　understand　him；　and　see　with　rounded　outline　what　his　limits　are；this；　which　would　mean　that　they　are　bigger　than　he；　is　forever　denied　them。　　Their　one　good　understanding　of　him　is　that　they　at　last　should　loyally　say；　〃We　do　not　quite　understand　thee；　we　perceive　thee　to　be　nobler　and　wiser　and　bigger　than　we；　and　will　loyally　follow　thee。〃

The　question　therefore　arises；　Whether；　since　reform　of　parliament　and　such　like　have　done　so　little　in　that　respect；　the　problem　might　not　be　with　some　hope　attacked　in　the　direct　manner？　　Suppose　all　our　Institutions；　and　Public　Methods　of　Procedure；　to　continue　for　the　present　as　they　are；　and　suppose　farther　a　Reform　Premier；　and　the　English　Nation　once　awakening　under　him　to　a　due　sense　of　the　infinite　importance；　nay　the　vital　necessity　there　is　of　getting　able　and　abler　men：might　not　some　heroic　wisdom；　and　actual　〃ability〃　to　do　what　must　be　done；　prove　discoverable　to　said　Premier；　and　so　the　indispensable　Heaven's…blessing　descend　to　us　from　_above_；　since　none　has　yet　sprung　from　below？　　From　above　we　shall　have　to　try　it；　the　other　is　exhausted；a　hopeless　method　that！　　The　utmost　passion　of　the　house…inmates；　ignorant　of　masonry　and　architecture；　cannot　avail　to　cure　the　house　of　smoke：　　not　if　_they_　vote　and　agitate　forever；　and　bestir　themselves　to　the　length　even　of　street…barricades；　will　the　_smoke_　in　the　least　abate：　　how　can　it？　　Their　passion　exercised　in　such　ways；　till　Doomsday；　will　avail　them　nothing。　　Let　their　passion　rage　steadily　against　the　existing　major…domos　to　this　effect；　〃_Find_　us　men　skilled　in　house…building；　acquainted　with　the　laws　of　atmospheric　suction；　and　capable　to　cure　smoke；〃　something　might　come　of　it！　　In　the　lucky　circumstance　of　having　one　man　of　real　intellect　and　courage　to　put　at　the　head　of　the　movement；　much　would　come　of　it；a　New　Downing　Street；　fit　for　the　British　Nation　and　its　bitter　necessities　in　this　Now　Era；　would　come；　and　from　that；　in　answer　to　continuous　sacred　fidelity　and　valiant　toil；　all　good　whatsoever　would　gradually　come。

Of　the　Continental　nuisance　called　〃Bureaucracy；〃if　this　should　alarm　any　reader；I　can　see　no　risk　or　possibility　in　England。　　Democracy　is　hot　enough　here；　fierce　enough；　it　is　perennial；　universal；　clearly　invincible　among　us　henceforth。　　No　danger　it　should　let　itself　be　flung　in　chains　by　sham　secretaries　of　the　Pedant　species；　and　accept　their　vile　Age　of　Pinchbeck　for　its　Golden　Age！　　Democracy　clamors；　with　its　Newspapers；　its　Parliaments；　and　all　its　twenty…seven　million　throats；　continually　in　this　Nation　forevermore。　　I　remark；　too；　that；　the　unconscious　purport　of　all　its　clamors　is　even　this；　〃Find　us　men　skilled；〃_make_　a　New　Downing　Street；　fit　for　the　New　Era！


Of　the　Foreign　Office；　in　its　reformed　state；　we　have　not　much　to　say。　Abolition　of　imaginary　work；　and　replacement　of　it　by　real；　is　on　all　hands　understood　to　be　very　urgent　there。　　Large　needless　expenditures　of　money；　immeasurable　ditto　of　hypocrisy　and　grimace；　embassies；　protocols；　worlds　of　extinct　traditions；　empty　pedantries；　foul　cobwebs：but　we　will　by　no　means　apply　the　〃live　coal〃　of　our　witty　friend；　the　Foreign　Office　will　repent；　and　not　be　driven　to　suicide！　　A　truer　time　will　come　for　the　Continental　Nations　too：　　Authorities　based　on　truth；　and　on　the　silent　or　spoken　Worship　of　Human　Nobleness；　will　again　get　themselves　established　there；　all　Sham…Authorities；　and　consequent　Real…Anarchies　based　on　universal　suffrage　and　the　Gospel　according　to　George　Sand；　being　put　away；　and　noble　action；　heroic　new…developments　of　human　faculty　and　industry；　and　blessed　fruit　as　of　Paradise　getting　itself　conquered　from　the　waste　battle…field　of　the　chaotic　elements；　will　once　more；　there　as　here；　begin　to　show　themselves。

When　the　Continental　Nations　have　once　got　to　the　bottom　of　_their_　Augean　Stable；　and　begun　to　have　real　enterprises　based　on　the　eternal　facts　again；　our　Foreign　Office　may　again　have　extensive　concerns　with　them。　　And　at　all　times；　and　even　now；　there　will　remain　the　question　to　be　sincerely　put　and　wisely　answered；　What　essential　concern　_has_　the　British　Nation　with　them　and　their　enterprises？　　Any　concern　at　all；　except　that　of　handsomely　keeping　apart　from　them？　　If　so；　what　are　the　methods　of　best　managing　it？At　present；　as　was　said；　while　Red　Republic　but　clashes　with　foul　Bureaucracy；　and　Nations；　sunk　in　blind　ignavia；　demand　a　universal…suffrage　Parliament　to　heal　their　wretchedness；　and　wild　Anarchy　and　Phallus…Worship　struggle　with　Sham…Kingship　and　extinct　or　galvanized　Catholicism；　and　in　the　Cave　of　the　Winds　all　manner　of　rotten　waifs　and　wrecks　are　hurled　against　each　other；our　English　interest　in　the　controversy；　however　huge　said　controversy　grow；　is　quite　trifling；　we　have　only　in　a　handsome　manner　to　say　to　it：　　〃Tumble　and　rage　along；　ye　rotten　waifs　and　wrecks；　clash　and　collide　as　seems　fittest　to　you；　and　smite　each　other　into　annihilation　at　your　own　good　pleasure。　　In　that　huge　conflict；　dismal　but　unavoidable；　we；　thanks　to　our　heroic　ancestors；　having　got　so　far　ahead　of　you；　have　now　no　interest　at　all。　　Our　decided　notion　is；　the　dead　ought　to　bury　their　dead　in　such　a　case：　　and　so　we　have　the　honor　to　be；　with　distinguished　consideration；　your　entirely　devoted；FLIMNAP；　SEC。　FOREIGN　DEPARTMENT。〃I　really　think　Flimnap；　till　truer　times　come；　ought　to　treat　much　of　his　work　in　this　way：　　cautious　to　give　offence　to　his　neighbors；　resolute　not　to　concern　himself　in　any　of　their　self…annihilating　operations　whatsoever。


Foreign　wars　are　sometimes　unavoidable。　　We　ourselves；　in　the　course　of　natural　merchandising　and　laudable　business；　have　now　and　then　got　into　ambiguous　situations；　into　quarrels　which　needed　to　be　settled；　and　without　fighting　would　not　settle。　　Sugar　Islands；　Spice　Islands；　Indias；　Canadas；　these；　by　the　real　decree　of　Heaven；