the kentons-第23章

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than　I've　been。〃

〃You　don't　mean　you've　been　trying　to　find　it　out！〃

〃Ah；　now　I'm　not　sure　about　the　superior　delicacy！〃

〃Oh；　how　good！〃　　said　Miss　Rasmith。　　〃　What　a　pity　you　should　be　wasted
in　a　calling　that　limits　you　so　much。〃

〃You　call　it　limiting？　　I　didn't　know　but　I　had　gone　too　far。〃

〃Not　at　all！　　You　know　there's　nothing　I　like　so　much　as　those　little
digs。〃

〃I　had　forgotten。　　Then　you　won't　mind　my　saying　that　this　surveillance
seems　to　me　rather　more　than　I　have　any　right　to　from　you。〃

〃How　exquisitely　you　put　it！　　Who　else　could　have　told　me　to　mind　my　own
business　so　delightfully？　　Well；　it　isn't　my　business。　　I　acknowledge
that；　and　I　spoke　only　because　I　knew　you　would　be　sorry　if　you　had　gone
too　far。　　I　remembered　our　promise　to　be　friends。〃

She　threw　a　touch　of　real　feeling　into　her　tone；　and　he　responded；　〃Yes；
and　I　thank　you　for　it；　though　it　isn't　easy。〃

She　put　out　her　hand　to　him；　and；　as　he　questioningly　took　it；　she
pressed　his　with　animation。　　〃　Of　course　it　isn't！　　Or　it　wouldn't　be　for
any　other　man。　　But　don't　you　suppose　I　appreciate　that　supreme　courage
of　yours？　　There　is　nobody　else…nobody！who　could　stand　up　to　an
impertinence　and　turn　it　to　praise　by　such　humility。〃

〃Don't　go　too　far；　or　I　shall　be　turning　your　praise　to　impertinence　by
my　humility。　　You're　quite　right；　though；　about　the　main　matter。　　I
needn't　suppose　anything　so　preposterous　as　you　suggest；　to　feel　that
people　are　best　left　alone　to　outlive　their　troubles；　unless　they　are　of
the　most　obvious　kind。〃

〃Now；　if　I　thought　I　had　done　anything　to　stop　you　from　offering　that
sort　of　helpfulness　which　makes　you　a　blessing　to　everybody；　I　should
never　forgive　myself。〃

〃Nothing　so　dire　as　that；　I　believe。　　But　if　you've　made　me　question　the
propriety　of　applying　the　blessing　in　all　cases；　you　have　done　a　very
good　thing。〃

Miss　Rasmith　was　silent　and　apparently　serious。　　After　a　moment　she　said；
〃And　I；　for　my　part；　promise　to　let　poor　little　Boyne　alone。〃

Breckon　laughed。　　〃Don't　burlesque　it！　　Besides；　I　haven't　promised
anything。〃

〃That　is　very　true；〃　said　Miss　Rasmith；　and　she　laughed；　too。




XVI。

In　one　of　those　dramatic　reveries　which　we　all　hold　with　ourselves　when
fortune　has　pressingly　placed　us；　Ellen　Kenton　had　imagined　it　possible
for　her　to　tell　her　story　to　the　man　who　had　so　gently　and　truly　tried　to
be　her　friend。　　It　was　mostly　in　the　way　of　explaining　to　him　how　she　was
unworthy　of　his　friendship　that　the　story　was　told；　and　she　fancied
telling　it　without　being　scandalized　at　violating　the　conventions　that
should　have　kept　her　from　even　dreaming　of　such　a　thing。　　It　was　all
exalted　to　a　plane　where　there　was　no　question　of　fit　or　unfit　in　doing
it；　but　only　the　occasion；　and　he　would　never　hear　of　the　unworthiness
which　she　wished　to　ascribe　to　herself。　　Sometimes　he　mournfully　left　her
when　she　persisted；　left　her　forever；　and　sometimes　he　refused；　and
retained　with　her　in　a　sublime　kindness；　a　noble　amity；　lofty　and　serene；
which　did　not　seek　to　become　anything　else。　　In　this　case　she　would　break
from　her　reveries　with　self…accusing　cries；　under　her　breath；　of　〃Silly；
silly！　　Oh；　how　disgusting！〃　　and　if　at　that　moment　Breckon　were　really
coming　up　to　sit　by　her；　she　would　blush　to　her　hair；　and　wish　to　run
away；　and　failing　the　force　for　this；　would　sit　cold　and　blank　to　his
civilities；　and　have　to　be　skilfully　and　gradually　talked　back　to　self…
respect　and　self…tolerance。

The　recurrence　of　these　reveries　and　their　consequence　in　her　made　it
difficult　for　him　to　put　in　effect　the　promise　he　had　given　himself　in
Miss　Rasmith's　presence。　　If　Ellen　had　been　eager　to　welcome　his　coming；
it　would　have　been　very　simple　to　keep　away　from　her；　but　as　she　appeared
anxious　to　escape　him；　and　had　to　be　entreated；　as　it　were；　to　suffer　his
society；　something　better　than　his　curiosity　was　piqued；　though　that　was
piqued；　too。　　He　believed　that　he　saw　her　lapsing　again　into　that　morbid
state　from　which　he　had　seemed　once　able　to　save　her；　and　he　could　not
help　trying　again。　　He　was　the　more　bound　to　do　so　by　the　ironical
observance　of　Miss　Rasmith；　who　had　to　be　defied　first；　and　then
propitiated；　certainly；　when　she　saw　him　apparently　breaking　faith　with
her；　she　had　a　right　to　some　sort　of　explanation；　but　certainly　also　she
had　no　right　to　a　blind　and　unreasoning　submission　from　him。　　His
embarrassment　was　heightened　by　her　interest　in　Miss　Kenton；　whom；　with
an　admirable　show　of　now　finding　her　safe　from　Breckon's　attractions；　she
was　always　wishing　to　study　from　his　observation。　　What　was　she　really
like？　　The　girl　had　a　perfect　fascination　for　her；　she　envied　him　his
opportunities　of　knowing　her；　and　his　privileges　of　making　that
melancholy　face　light　up　with　that　heart…breaking　smile；　and　of　banishing
that　delicious　shyness　with　which　she　always　seemed　to　meet　him。　　Miss
Rasmith　had　noticed　it；　how　could　she　help　noticing　it？

Breckon　wished　to　himself　that　she　had　been　able　to　help　noticing　it；　or
were　more　capable　of　minding　her　own　business　than　she　showed　herself；
and　his　heart　closed　about　Ellen　with　a　tenderness　that　was　dangerously
indignant。　　At　the　same　time　he　felt　himself　withheld　by　Miss　Rasmith's
witness　from　being　all　to　the　girl　that　he　wished　to　be；　and　that　he　now
seemed　to　have　been　in　those　first　days　of　storm；　while　Miss　Rasmith　and
her　mother　were　still　keeping　their　cabin。　　He　foresaw　that　it　would　end
in　Miss　Rasmith's　sympathetic　nature　not　being　able　to　withhold　itself
from　Ellen's　need　of　cheerful　companionship；　and　he　was　surprised；　as
little　as　he　was　pleased；　one　morning；　when　he　came　to　take　the　chair
beside　her　to　find　Miss　Rasmith　in　it；　talking　and　laughing　to　the　girl；
who　perversely　showed　herself　amused。　　Miss　Rasmith　made　as　if　to　offer
him　the　seat；　but　he　had　to　go　away　disappointed；　after　standing　long
enough　before　them　to　be　aware　that　they　were　suspending　some　topic　while
he　stayed。

He　naturally　supposed　the　topic　to　be　himself；　but　it　was　not　so；　or　at
least　not　directly　so。　　It　was　only　himself　as　related　to　the　scolding　he
had　given　Miss　Rasmith　for　trifling　with　the　innocence　of　Boyne；　which
she　wished　Miss　Kenton　to　understand　as　the　effect　of　a　real　affection
for　her　brother。　　She　loved　all　boys；　and　Boyne　was　simply　the　most
delightful　creature　in　the　world。　　She　went　on　to　explain　how　delightful
he　was；　and　showed　a　such　an　appreciation　of　the　infantile　sweetness
mingled　with　the　mature　severity　of　Boyne's　character　that　Ellen　could
not　help　being　pleased　and　won。　　She　told　some　little　stories　of　Boyne
that　threw　a　light　also　their　home　life　in　Tuskingum；　and　Miss　Rasmith
declared　herself　perfectly　fascinated；　and　wished　that　she　could　go　and
live　in　Tuskingum。　　She　protested　that　she　should　not　find　it　dull；　Boyne
alone　would　be　entertainment　enough；　and　she　figured　a　circumstance　so
idyllic　from　the　hints　she　had　gathered；　that　Ellen's　brow　darkened　in
silent　denial；　and　Miss　Rasmith　felt　herself；　as　the　children　say　in　the
game；　very　hot　in　her　proximity　to　the　girl's　secret。　　She　would　have
liked　to　know　it；　but　whether　she　felt　that　she　could　know　it　when　she
liked　enough；　or　whether　she　should　not　be　so　safe　with　Breckon　in
knowing　it；　she　veered　suddenly　away；　and　said　that　she　was　so　glad　to
have　Boyne's　family　know　the　peculiar　nature　of　her　devotion；　which　did
not　necessarily　mean　running　away　with　him；　though　it　might　come　to　that。　
She　supposed　she　was　a　little　morbid　about　it　from　what　Mr。　Breckon　had
been　saying；　he　had　a　conscience　that　would　break　the　peace　of　a　whole
community；　though　he　was　the　greatest　possible　favorite；　not　only　with
his　own　congregation；　which　simply　worshipped　him；　but　with　the　best
society；　where　he　was　in　constant　request。

It　was　not　her　fault　if　she　did　not　overdo　these　history；　but　perhaps　it
was　all　true　about　the　number　of　girls　who　were　ready　and　willing　to
marry　him。　　It　might　even　be　true；　though　she　had　no　direct　authority　for
saying　it；　that　he　had　made　up　his　mind　never　to　marry；　and　that　was　the
reason　why　he　felt　himself　so　safe　in　being　the　nicest　sort　of　friend。　
He　was　safe；　Miss　Rasmith　philosophized；　but　whether　other　people　were　so
safe　was　a　different　question。　　There　were　girls　who　were　said　to　be
dying　for　him；　but　of　course　those　things　were　always　said　about　a
handsome　young　minister。　　She　had　frankly　taken　him　on　his　own　ground；
from　the　beginning；　and　she　believed　that　this　was　what　he　liked。　　At　any
rate；　they　had　agreed　that　they　were　never　to　be　anything　but　the　best　of
friends；　and　they　always　had　been。

Mrs。　Kenton　came　and　shyly　took　the　chair　on　Miss　Rasmith's　other　side；
and　Miss　Rasmith　said　they　had　been　talking　about　Mr。　Breckon；　and　she
repeated　what　she　had　been　saying　to　Ellen。　　Mrs。　Kenton　assented　more
openly　than　Ellen　could　to　her　praises；　but　when　she　went　away；　and　her
daughter　sat　passive；　without　comment　or　apparent　interest；　the　mother
drew　a　long；　involuntary　sigh。

〃Do　you　like　her；　Ellen？〃

〃She　tries　to　be　pleasant；　I　think。〃

〃Do　you　think　she　really　knows　much　about　Mr。　Breckon？〃

〃Oh　yes。　　Why　not？　　She　belongs　to　his　church。〃

〃He　doesn't　seem　to　me　like　a　person　who　would　have　a　parcel　of　girls
tagging　after　him。〃

〃That　is　what　they　do　in　the　East；　Boyne　says。〃

〃I　wish　she　would　let　Boyne　alone。　　She　is　making　a　fool　of　the　child。　
He's　round　with　her　every　moment。　　I　think　she　ought　to　be　ashamed；　such
an　old　thing！〃

Ellen　chose　to　protest；　or　thought　it　fair　to　do　so。　　〃I　don't　believe
she　is　doing　him　any　harm。　　She　just　lets　him　talk　out；　and　everybody
else　checks　him　up　so。　　It　was　nice　of　her　to　come　and　talk　with　me；　when
we　had　all　been　keeping　away　from　her。　　Perhaps　he　sent　her；　though。　　She
says　they　have　always　been　such　good　friends　because　she　wouldn't　be
anything　else　from　the　beginning。〃

〃I　don't　see　why　she　need　have　told　you　that。〃

〃Oh；　it　was　just　to　show　he　was　run　after。　　I　wonder　if　he　thinks　we　are
running　after　him？　　Momma；　I　am　tired　of　him！　　I　wish　he　wouldn't　speak
to　me　any　more。〃

〃Why！　do　you　really　dislike　him；　Ellen？〃

〃No；　not　dislike　him。　　But　it　tires　me　to　have　him　trying　to　amuse　me。　
Don't　you　understand？〃

Mrs。　Kenton　said　yes；　she　understood；　but　she　was　clear　only　of　the　fact
that　Ellen　seemed　flushed　and　weak　at　that　moment。　　She　believed　that　it
was　Miss　Rasmith　and　not　Mr。　Breckon　who　was　to　blame；　but　she　said：
〃Well；　you　needn't　worry　about　it　long。　　It　will　only　be　a　day　or　two　now
till　we　get　to　Boulogne；　and　then　he　will　leave　us。　　Hadn't　you　better　go
down　now；　and　rest　awhile　in　your　berth？　　I　will　bring　your　things。〃

Ellen　rose；　pulling　her　wraps　from　her　skirts　to　give　them　to　her　mother。　
A　voice　from　behind　said　between　their　meeting　shoulders：　〃Oh；　are　you
going　down？　　I　was　just　coming　to　beg　Miss　Kenton　to　take　a　little　walk
with　me；〃　and　they　looked　round　together　and　met　Breckon's　smiling　face。

〃I'm　afraid；〃　Mrs。　Kenton　began；　and　then；　like　a　well…trained　American
mother；　she　stopped　and　left　the　affair　to　her　daughter。

〃Do　you　think　you　can　get　down　with　them；　momma？〃　　the　girl　asked；　and
someho