castle rackrent-第17章

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k　in　at　the　punch…　bowl；　and　observe　that　Jason　and　he　had　been　sitting　over　it　very　good　friends；　so　the　mob　was　content；　and　he　sent　them　out　some　whisky　to　drink　his　health；　and　that　was　the　last　time　his　honour's　health　was　ever　drunk　at　Castle　Rackrent。

The　very　next　day；　being　too　proud；　as　he　said　to　me；　to　stay　an　hour　longer　in　a　house　that　did　not　belong　to　him；　he　sets　off　to　the　Lodge；　and　I　along　with　him　not　many　hours　after。　　And　there　was　great　bemoaning　through　all　O'Shaughlin's　Town；　which　I　stayed　to　witness；　and　gave　my　poor　master　a　full　account　of　when　I　got　to　the　Lodge。　　He　was　very　low；　and　in　his　bed；　when　I　got　there；　and　complained　of　a　great　pain　about　his　heart；　but　I　guessed　it　was　only　trouble　and　all　the　business；　let　alone　vexation；　he　had　gone　through　of　late；　and　knowing　the　nature　of　him　from　a　boy；　I　took　my　pipe；　and　whilst　smoking　it　by　the　chimney　began　telling　him　how　he　was　beloved　and　regretted　in　the　county；　and　it　did　him　a　deal　of　good　to　hear　it。

'Your　honour　has　a　great　many　friends　yet　that　you　don't　know　of；　rich　and　poor；　in　the　county；'　says　I；　'for　as　I　was　coming　along　the　road　I　met　two　gentlemen　in　their　own　carriages；　who　asked　after　you；　knowing　me；　and　wanted　to　know　where　you　was　and　all　about　you；　and　even　how　old　I　was。　　Think　of　that。'

Then　he　wakened　out　of　his　doze；　and　began　questioning　me　who　the　gentlemen　were。　And　the　next　morning　it　came　into　my　head　to　go；　unknown　to　anybody；　with　my　master's　compliments；　round　to　many　of　the　gentlemen's　houses；　where　he　and　my　lady　used　to　visit；　and　people　that　I　knew　were　his　great　friends；　and　would　go　to　Cork　to　serve　him　any　day　in　the　year；　and　I　made　bold　to　try　to　borrow　a　trifle　of　cash　from　them。　　They　all　treated　me　very　civil　for　the　most　part；　and　asked　a　great　many　questions　very　kind　about　my　lady　and　Sir　Condy　and　all　the　family；　and　were　greatly　surprised　to　learn　from　me　Castle　Rackrent　was　sold；　and　my　master　at　the　Lodge　for　health；　and　they　all　pitied　him　greatly；　and　he　had　their　good　wishes；　if　that　would　do；　but　money　was　a　thing　they　unfortunately　had　not　any　of　them　at　this　time　to　spare。　　I　had　my　journey　for　my　pains；　and　I；　not　used　to　（walking；　nor　supple　as　formerly；　was　greatly　tired；　but　had　the　satisfaction　of　telling　my　master；　when　I　got　to　the　Lodge；　all　the　civil　things　said　by　high　and　low。

'Thady；'　says　he；　'all　you've　been　telling　me　brings　a　strange　thought　into　my　head。　　I've　a　notion　I　shall　not　be　long　for　this　world　anyhow；　and　I've　a　great　fancy　to　see　my　own　funeral　afore　I　die。'　　I　was　greatly　shocked；　at　the　first　speaking；　to　hear　him　speak　so　light　about　his　funeral；　and　he　to　all　appearance　in　good　health；　but　recollecting　myself；　answered：

'To　be　sure　it　would　be　as　fine　a　sight　as　one　could　see；　I　dared　to　say；　and　one　I　should　be　proud　to　witness；　and　I　did　not　doubt　his　honour's　would　be　as　great　a　funeral　as　ever　Sir　Patrick　O'Shaughlin's　was；　and　such　a　one　as　that　had　never　been　known　in　the　county　afore　or　since。'　　But　I　never　thought　he　was　in　earnest　about　seeing　his　own　funeral　himself　till　the　next　day　he　returns　to　it　again。

'Thady；'　says　he；　'as　far　as　the　wake　goes；　sure　I　might　without　any　great　trouble　have　the　satisfaction　of　seeing　a　bit　of　my　own　funeral。'　　＇A　'wake'　in　England　is　a　meeting　avowedly　for　merriment；　in　Ireland　it　is　a　nocturnal　meeting　avowedly　for　the　purpose　of　watching　and　bewailing　the　dead；　but　in　reality　for　gossiping　and　debauchery。　＇See　GLOSSARY　28＇＇

'Well；　since　your　honour's　honour's　SO　bent　upon　it；'　says　I；　not　willing　to　cross　him；　and　he　in　trouble；　'we　must　see　what　we　can　do。'

So　he　fell　into　a　sort　of　sham　disorder；　which　was　easy　done；　as　he　kept　his　bed；　and　no　one　to　see　him；　and　I　got　my　shister；　who　was　an　old　woman　very　handy　about　the　sick；　and　very　skilful；　to　come　up　to　the　Lodge　to　nurse　him；　and　we　gave　out；　she　knowing　no　better；　that　he　was　just　at　his　latter　end；　and　it　answered　beyond　anything；　and　there　was　a　great　throng　of　people；　men；　women；　and　childer；　and　there　being　only　two　rooms　at　the　Lodge；　except　what　was　locked　up　full　of　Jason's　furniture　and　things；　the　house　was　soon　as　full　and　fuller　than　it　could　hold；　and　the　heat；　and　smoke；　and　noise　wonderful　great；　and　standing　amongst　them　that　were　near　the　bed；　but　not　thinking　at　all　of　the　dead；　I　was　startled　by　the　sound　of　my　master's　voice　from　under　the　greatcoats　that　had　been　thrown　all　at　top；　and　I　went　close　up；　no　one　noticing。

'Thady；'　says　he；　'I've　had　enough　of　this；　I'm　smothering；　and　can't　hear　a　word　of　all　they're　saying　of　the　deceased。'

'God　bless　you；　and　lie　still　and　quiet；'　says　I；　'a　bit　longer；　for　my　shister's　afraid　of　ghosts；　and　would　die　on　the　spot　with　fright　was　she　to　see　you　come　to　life　all　on　a　sudden　this　way　without　the　least　preparation。'

So　he　lays　him　still；　though　well　nigh　stifled；　and　I　made　all　haste　to　tell　the　secret　of　the　joke；　whispering　to　one　and　t'other；　and　there　was　a　great　surprise；　but　not　so　great　as　we　had　laid　out　it　would。　　'And　aren't　we　to　have　the　pipes　and　tobacco；　after　coming　so　far　to…night？'　　said　some；　but　they　were　all　well　enough　pleased　when　his　honour　got　up　to　drink　with　them；　and　sent　for　more　spirits　from　a　shebeen…house　＇'Shebeen…　house；'　a　hedge　alehouse。　　Shebeen　properly　means　weak；　small…　beer；　taplash。＇；　where　they　very　civilly　let　him　have　it　upon　credit。　So　the　night　passed　off　very　merrily；　but　to　my　mind　Sir　Condy　was　rather　upon　the　sad　order　in　the　midst　of　it　all；　not　finding　there　had　been　such　a　great　talk　about　himself　after　his　death　as　he　had　always　expected　to　hear。

The　next　morning；　when　the　house　was　cleared　of　them；　and　none　but　my　shister　and　myself　left　in　the　kitchen　with　Sir　Condy；　one　opens　the　door　and　walks　in；　and　who　should　it　be　but　Judy　M'Quirk　herself！　　I　forgot　to　notice　that　she　had　been　married　long　since；　whilst　young　Captain　Moneygawl　lived　at　the　Lodge；　to　the　captain's　huntsman；　who　after　a　whilst　'listed　and　left　her；　and　was　killed　in　the　wars。　　Poor　Judy　fell　off　greatly　in　her　good　looks　after　her　being　married　a　year　or　two；　and　being　smoke…dried　in　the　cabin；　and　neglecting　herself　like；　it　was　hard　for　Sir　Condy　himself　to　know　her　again　till　she　spoke；　but　when　she　says；　'It's　Judy　M'Quirk；　please　your　honour；　don't　you　remember　her？'

'Oh；　Judy；　is　it　you？'　says　his　honour。　'Yes；　sure；　I　remember　you　very　well；　but　you're　greatly　altered；　Judy；'

'Sure　it's　time　for　me；'　says　she。　'And　I　think　your　honour；　since　I　seen　you　lastbut　that's　a　great　while　agois　altered　too。'

'And　with　reason；　Judy；'　says　Sir　Condy；　fetching　a　sort　of　a　sigh。　'But　how's　this；　Judy？'　　he　goes　on。　　'I　take　it　a　little　amiss　of　you　that　you　were　not　at　my　wake　last　night。'

'Ah；　don't　be　being　jealous　of　that；'　says　she；　'I　didn't　hear　a　sentence　of　your　honour's　wake　till　it　was　all　over；　or　it　would　have　gone　hard　with　me　but　I　would　have　been　at　it；　sure；　but　I　was　forced　to　go　ten　miles　up　the　country　three　days　ago　to　a　wedding　of　a　relation　of　my　own's；　and　didn't　get　home　till　after　the　wake　was　over。　　But；'　says　she；　'it　won't　be　so；　I　hope；　the　next　time；　please　your　honour。'　　＇At　the　coronation　of　one　of　our　monarchs　the　King　complained　of　the　confusion　which　happened　in　the　procession。　　'The　great　officer　who　presided　told　his　Majesty　that　'it　should　not　be　so　next　time。'＇

'That　we　shall　see；　Judy；'　says　his　honour；　'and　maybe　sooner　than　you　think　for；　for　I've　been　very　unwell　this　while　past；　and　don't　reckon　anyway　I'm　long　for　this　world。'

At　this　Judy　takes　up　the　corner　of　her　apron；　and　puts　it　first　to　one　eye　and　then　to　t'other；　being　to　all　appearance　in　great　trouble；　and　my　shister　put　in　her　word；　and　bid　his　honour　have　a　good　heart；　for　she　was　sure　it　was　only　the　gout　that　Sir　Patrick　used　to　have　flying　about　him；　and　he　ought　to　drink　a　glass　or　a　bottle　extraordinary　to　keep　it　out　of　his　stomach；　and　he　promised　to　take　her　advice；　and　sent　out　for　more　spirits　immediately；　and　Judy　made　a　sign　to　me；　and　I　went　over　to　the　door　to　her；　and　she　said；　'I　wonder　to　see　Sir　Condy　so　low：　has　he　heard　the　news？'

'What　news？'　says　I。

'Didn't　ye　hear　it；　then？'　says　she；　'my　Lady　Rackrent　that　was　is　kilt　＇See　GLOSSARY　29＇　and　lying　for　dead；　and　I　don't　doubt　but　it's　all　over　with　her　by　this　time。'

'Mercy　on　us　all；'　says　I；　'how　was　it？'

'The　jaunting…car　it　was　that　ran　away　with　her；'　says　Judy。　　'I　was　coming　home　that　same　time　from　Biddy　M'Guggin's　marriage；　and　a　great　crowd　of　people　too　upon　the　road；　coming　from　the　fair　of　Crookaghnawaturgh；　and　I　sees　a　jaunting…car　standing　in　the　middle　of　the　road；　and　with　the　two　wheels　off　and　all　tattered。　　〃What's　this？〃　says　I。　　〃Didn't　ye　hear　of　it？〃　　says　they　that　were　looking　on；　〃it's　my　Lady　Rackrent's　car；　that　was　running　away　from　her　husband；　and　the　horse　took　fright　at　a　carrion　that　lay　across　the　road；　and　so　ran　away　with　the　jaunting…car；　and　my　Lady　Rackrent　and　her　maid　screaming；　and　the　horse　ran　with　them　against　a　car　that　was　coming　from　the　fair　with　the　boy　asleep　on　it；　and　the　lady's　petticoat　hanging　out　of　the　jaunting…car　caught；　and　she　was　dragged　I　can't　tell　you　how　far　upon　the　road；　and　it　all　broken　up　with　the　stones　just　going　to　be　pounded；　and　one　of　the　road…makers；　with　his　sledge…hammer　in　his　hand；　stops　the　horse　at　the　last；　but　my　Lady　Rackrent　was　all　kilt　and　smashed；〃　＇KILT　AND　SMASHED。Our　author　is　not　here　guilty　of　an　anti…climax。　The　mere　English　reader；　from　a　similarity　of　sound　between　the　words　'kilt'　and　'killed；'　might　be　induced　to　suppose　that　their　meanings　are　similar；　yet　they　are　not　by　any　means　in　Ireland　synonymous　terms。　　Thus　you　may　hear　a　man　exclaim；　'I'm　kilt　and　murdered！'　but　he　frequently　means　only　that　he　has　received　a　black　eye　or　a　slight　contusion。　　'I'm　kilt　all　over'　means　that　he　is　in　a　worse　state　than　being　simply　'kilt。'　　Thus；　'I'm　kilt　with　the　cold；'　is　nothing　to　'I'm　kilt　all　over　with　the　rheumatism。'＇　and　they　lifted　her　into　a　cabin　hard　by；　and　the　maid　was　found　after　where　she　had　been　thrown　in　the　gripe　of　a　ditch；　her　cap　and　bonnet　all　full　of　bog　water；　and　they　say　my　lady　can't　live　anyway。〃　　Thady；　pray　now　is　it　true　what　I'm　told　for　sartain；　that　Sir　Condy　has　made　over　all　to　your　son　Jason？'

'All；'　says　I。

'All　entirely？'　says　she　again。

'All　entirely'　says　I。

'Then；'　says　she；　'that's　a　great　shame；　but　don't　be　telling　Jason　what　I　say。'

'And　what　is　it　you　say？'　cries　Sir　Condy；　leaning　over　betwixt　us；　which　made　Judy　start　greatly。　'I　know　the　time　when　Judy　M'Quirk　would　never　have　stayed　so　long　talking　at　the　door　and　I　in　the　house。'

'Oh！'　says　Judy；　'for　shame；　Sir　Condy；　times　are　altered　since　then；　and　it's　my　Lady　Rackrent　you　ought　to　be　thinking　of。'

'And　why　should　I　be　thinking　of　her；　that's　not　thinking　of　me　now？'　says　Sir　Condy。

'No　matter　for　that；'　says　Judy；　very　properly；　'it's　time　you　should　be　thinking　of　her；　if　ever　you　mean　to　do　it　at　all；　for　don't　you　know　she's　lying　for　death？'

'My　Lady　Rackrent！'　says　Sir　Condy；　in　a　surprise；　'why　it's　but　two　days　since　we　parted；　as　you　very　well　know；　Thady；　in　her　full　health　and　spirits；　and　s