the secret sharer-第2章
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established routine of duties even from the kindest of motives。
My action might have made me appear eccentric。 Goodness only knew
how that absurdly whiskered mate would 〃account〃 for my conduct；
and what the whole ship thought of that informality of their new captain。
I was vexed with myself。
Not from compunction certainly； but； as it were mechanically；
I proceeded to get the ladder in myself。 Now a side ladder
of that sort is a light affair and comes in easily； yet my
vigorous tug； which should have brought it flying on board；
merely recoiled upon my body in a totally unexpected jerk。
What the devil！ 。 。 。 I was so astounded by the immovableness
of that ladder that I remained stockstill； trying to
account for it to myself like that imbecile mate of mine。
In the end； of course； I put my head over the rail。
The side of the ship made an opaque belt of shadow on
the darkling glassy shimmer of the sea。 But I saw at once
something elongated and pale floating very close to the ladder。
Before I could form a guess a faint flash of phosphorescent light；
which seemed to issue suddenly from the naked body of a man；
flickered in the sleeping water with the elusive； silent play
of summer lightning in a night sky。 With a gasp I saw revealed
to my stare a pair of feet； the long legs； a broad livid back
immersed right up to the neck in a greenish cadaverous glow。
One hand； awash； clutched the bottom rung of the ladder。
He was complete but for the head。 A headless corpse！ The cigar
dropped out of my gaping mouth with a tiny plop and a short hiss
quite audible in the absolute stillness of all things under heaven。
At that I suppose he raised up his face； a dimly pale oval
in the shadow of the ship's side。 But even then I could only
barely make out down there the shape of his black…haired head。
However； it was enough for the horrid； frost…bound sensation
which had gripped me about the chest to pass off。
The moment of vain exclamations was past； too。 I only climbed
on the spare spar and leaned over the rail as far as I could；
to bring my eyes nearer to that mystery floating alongside。
As he hung by the ladder； like a resting swimmer； the sea
lightning played about his limbs at every stir； and he appeared
in it ghastly； silvery； fishlike。 He remained as mute as
a fish； too。 He made no motion to get out of the water； either。
It was inconceivable that he should not attempt to come on board；
and strangely troubling to suspect that perhaps he did not want to。
And my first words were prompted by just that troubled incertitude。
〃What's the matter？〃 I asked in my ordinary tone； speaking down to the face
upturned exactly under mine。
〃Cramp；〃 it answered； no louder。 Then slightly anxious； 〃I say；
no need to call anyone。〃
〃I was not going to；〃 I said。
〃Are you alone on deck？〃
〃Yes。〃
I had somehow the impression that he was on the point of letting go the ladder
to swim away beyond my kenmysterious as he came。 But； for the moment；
this being appearing as if he had risen from the bottom of the sea
（it was certainly the nearest land to the ship） wanted only to know the time。
I told him。 And he； down there； tentatively：
〃I suppose your captain's turned in？〃
〃I am sure he isn't；〃 I said。
He seemed to struggle with himself； for I heard something
like the low； bitter murmur of doubt。 〃What's the good？〃
His next words came out with a hesitating effort。
〃Look here； my man。 Could you call him out quietly？〃
I thought the time Had come to declare myself。
〃I am the captain。〃
I heard a 〃By Jove！〃 whispered at the level of the water。
The phosphorescence flashed in the swirl of the water all
about his limbs； his other hand seized the ladder。
〃My name's Leggatt。〃
The voice was calm and resolute。 A good voice。 The self…possession
of that man had somehow induced a corresponding state in myself。
It was very quietly that I remarked：
〃You must be a good swimmer。〃
〃Yes。 I've been in the water practically since nine o'clock。
The question for me now is whether I am to let go this ladder
and go on swimming till I sink from exhaustion； orto come
on board here。〃
I felt this was no mere formula of desperate speech；
but a real alternative in the view of a strong soul。
I should have gathered from this that he was young； indeed； it is
only the young who are ever confronted by such clear issues。
But at the time it was pure intuition on my part。
A mysterious communication was established already between
us twoin the face of that silent； darkened tropical sea。
I was young； too； young enough to make no comment。
The man in the water began suddenly to climb up the ladder；
and I hastened away from the rail to fetch some clothes。
Before entering the cabin I stood still； listening in the lobby at
the foot of the stairs。 A faint snore came through the closed door
of the chief mate's room。 The second mate's door was on the hook；
but the darkness in there was absolutely soundless。 He； too；
was young and could sleep like a stone。 Remained the steward；
but he was not likely to wake up before he was called。
I got a sleeping suit out of my room and； coming back on deck；
saw the naked man from the sea sitting on the main hatch；
glimmering white in the darkness； his elbows on his knees and his
head in his hands。 In a moment he had concealed his damp body
in a sleeping suit of the same gray…stripe pattern as the one
I was wearing and followed me like my double on the poop。
Together we moved right aft； barefooted； silent。
〃What is it？〃 I asked in a deadened voice； taking the lighted lamp
out of the binnacle； and raising it to his face。
〃An ugly business。〃
He had rather regular features； a good mouth； light eyes under
somewhat heavy； dark eyebrows； a smooth； square forehead； no growth
on his cheeks； a small； brown mustache； and a well…shaped； round chin。
His expression was concentrated； meditative； under the inspecting
light of the lamp I held up to his face； such as a man thinking
hard in solitude might wear。 My sleeping suit was just right
for his size。 A well…knit young fellow of twenty…five at most。
He caught his lower lip with the edge of white； even teeth。
〃Yes；〃 I said； replacing the lamp in the binnacle。
The warm； heavy tropical night closed upon his head again。
〃There's a ship over there；〃 he murmured。
〃Yes； I know。 The Sephora。 Did you know of us？〃
〃Hadn't the slightest idea。 I am the mate of her〃
He paused and corrected himself。 〃I should say I WAS。〃
〃Aha！ Something wrong？〃
〃Yes。 Very wrong indeed。 I've killed a man。〃
〃What do you mean？ Just now？〃
〃No； on the passage。 Weeks ago。 Thirty…nine south。
When I say a man〃
〃Fit of temper；〃 I suggested； confidently。
The shadowy； dark head； like mine； seemed to nod imperceptibly
above the ghostly gray of my sleeping suit。 It was； in the night；
as though I had been faced by my own reflection in the depths
of a somber and immense mirror。
〃A pretty thing to have to own up to for a Conway boy；〃
murmured my double； distinctly。
〃You're a Conway boy？〃
〃I am；〃 he said； as if startled。 Then； slowly 。 。 。 〃Perhaps you too〃
It was so； but being a couple of years older I had left before
he joined。 After a quick interchange of dates a silence fell；
and I thought suddenly of my absurd mate with his terrific whiskers
and the 〃Bless my soulyou don't say so〃 type of intellect。
My double gave me an inkling of his thoughts by saying：
〃My father's a parson in Norfolk。 Do you see me before a judge
and jury on that charge？ For myself I can't see the necessity。
There are fellows that an angel from heavenAnd I am not that。
He was one of those creatures that are just simmering
all the time with a silly sort of wickedness。
Miserable devils that have no business to live at all。
He wouldn't do his duty and wouldn't let anybody else do theirs。
But what's the good of talking！ You know well enough the sort
of ill…conditioned snarling cur〃
He appealed to me as if our experiences had been as identical as our clothes。
And I knew well enough the pestiferous danger of such a character where there
are no means of legal repression。 And I knew well enough also that my double
there was no homicidal ruffian。 I did not think of asking him for details；
and he told me the story roughly in brusque； disconnected sentences。
I needed no more。 I saw it all going on as though I were myself inside
that other sleeping suit。
〃It happened while we were setting a reefed foresail； at dusk。
Reefed foresail！ You understand the sort of weather。 The only sail we
had left to keep the ship running； so you may guess what it had been
like for days。 Anxious sort of job； that。 He gave me some of his cursed
insolence at the sheet。 I tell you I was overdone with this terrific weather
that seemed to have no end to it。 Terrific； I tell youand a deep ship。
I believe the fellow himself was half crazed with funk。 It was no time
for gentlemanly reproof； so I turned round and felled him like an ox。
He up and at me。 We closed just as an awful sea made for the ship。
All hands saw it coming and took to the rigging； but I had him by
the throat； and went on shaking him like a rat； the men above us yelling；
‘Look out！ look out！' Then a crash as if the sky had fallen on my head。
They say that for over ten minutes hardly anything was to be seen
of the shipjust the three masts and a bit of the forecastle head
and of the poop all awash driving along in a smother of foam。
It was a miracle that they found us； jammed together behind the forebitts。
It's clear that I meant business； because I was holding him by the throat
still when they picked us up。 He was black in the face。 It was too much
for them。 It seems they rushed us aft together； gripped as we were；
screaming ‘Murder！' like a lot of lunatics； and broke into the cuddy。
And the ship running for her life； touch and go all the time； any minute
her last in a sea fit to turn your hair gray only a…looking at it。
I understand that the skipper； too； started raving like the rest of them。
The man had been deprived of sleep for more than a week； and to have
this sprung on him at the height of a furious gale nearly drove him
out of his mind。 I wonder they didn't fling me overboard after
getting the carcass of their precious shipmate out of my fingers。
They had rather a job to separate us； I've been told。 A sufficiently
fierce story to make an old judge and a respectable jury sit up a bit。
The first thing I heard when I came to myself was the maddening
howling of that endless gale； and on that the voice of the old man。
He was hanging on to my bunk； staring into my face out of his sou'wester。
〃‘Mr。 Leggatt； you have killed a man。 You can act no longer
as chief
