resurrection(复活)-第56章

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that　all　these　outward　signs　were　deceitful；　to　alter　his　life　in
such　a　way　that　he　would　not　have　to　be　present　at　such
ceremonials。　But　to　do　what　seemed　so　simple　would　have　cost　a
great　deal。　Besides　encountering　the　perpetual　hostility　of　all
those　who　were　near　to　him；　he　would　have　to　give　up　the　service
and　his　position；　and　sacrifice　his　hopes　of　being　useful　to
humanity　by　his　service；　now　and　in　the　future。　To　make　such　a
sacrifice　one　would　have　to　be　firmly　convinced　of　being　right。

And　he　was　firmly　convinced　he　was　right；　as　no　educated　man　of
our　time　can　help　being　convinced　who　knows　a　little　history　and
how　the　religions；　and　especially　Church　Christianity；
originated。

But　under　the　stress　of　his　daily　life　he；　a　truthful　man；
allowed　a　little　falsehood　to　creep　in。　He　said　that　in　order　to
do　justice　to　an　unreasonable　thing　one　had　to　study　the
unreasonable　thing。　It　was　a　little　falsehood；　but　it　sunk　him
into　the　big　falsehood　in　which　he　was　now　caught。

Before　putting　to　himself　the　question　whether　the　orthodoxy　in
which　he　was　born　and　bred；　and　which　every　one　expected　him　to
accept；　and　without　which　he　could　not　continue　his　useful
occupation；　contained　the　truth；　he　had　already　decided　the
answer。　And　to　clear　up　the　question　he　did　not　read　Voltaire；
Schopenhauer；　Herbert　Spencer；　or　Comte；　but　the　philosophical
works　of　Hegel　and　the　religious　works　of　Vinet　and　Khomyakoff；
and　naturally　found　in　them　what　he　wanted；　i。e。；　something　like
peace　of　mind　and　a　vindication　of　that　religious　teaching　in
which　he　was　educated；　which　his　reason　had　long　ceased　to
accept；　but　without　which　his　whole　life　was　filled　with
unpleasantness　which　could　all　be　removed　by　accepting　the
teaching。

And　so　he　adopted　all　the　usual　sophistries　which　go　to　prove
that　a　single　human　reason　cannot　know　the　truth；　that　the　truth
is　only　revealed　to　an　association　of　men；　and　can　only　be　known
by　revelation；　that　revelation　is　kept　by　the　church；　etc。　And　so
he　managed　to　be　present　at　prayers；　masses　for　the　dead；　to
confess；　make　signs　of　the　cross　in　front　of　icons；　with　a　quiet
mind；　without　being　conscious　of　the　lie；　and　to　continue　in　the
service　which　gave　him　the　feeling　of　being　useful　and　some
comfort　in　his　joyless　family　life。　Although　he　believed　this；　he
felt　with　his　entire　being　that　this　religion　of　his；　more　than
all　else；　was　not　〃the　right　thing；〃　and　that　is　why　his　eyes
always　looked　sad。

And　seeing　Nekhludoff；　whom　he　had　known　before　all　these　lies
had　rooted　themselves　within　him；　reminded　him　of　what　he　then
was。　It　was　especially　after　he　had　hurried　to　hint　at　his
religious　views　that　he　had　most　strongly　felt　all　this　〃not　the
right　thing；〃　and　had　become　painfully　sad。　Nekhludoff　felt　it
also　after　the　first　joy　of　meeting　his　old　friend　had　passed；
and　therefore；　though　they　promised　each　other　to　meet；　they　did
not　take　any　steps　towards　an　interview；　and　did　not　again　see
each　other　during　this　stay　of　Nekhludoff's　in　Petersburg。


CHAPTER　XXIV。

MARIETTE　TEMPTS　NEKHLUDOFF。

When　they　left　the　Senate；　Nekhludoff　and　the　advocate　walked　on
together；　the　advocate　having　given　the　driver　of　his　carriage
orders　to　follow　them。　The　advocate　told　Nekhludoff　the　story　of
the　chief　of　a　Government　department；　about　whom　the　Senators　had
been　talking：　how　the　thing　was　found　out；　and　how　the　man；　who
according　to　law　should　have　been　sent　to　the　mines；　had　been
appointed　Governor　of　a　town　in　Siberia。　Then　he　related　with
particular　pleasure　how　several　high…placed　persons　stole　a　lot
of　money　collected　for　the　erection　of　the　still　unfinished
monument　which　they　had　passed　that　morning；　also；　how　the
mistress　of　So…and…so　got　a　lot　of　money　at　the　Stock　Exchange；
and　how　So…and…so　agreed　with　So…and…so　to　sell　him　his　wife。　The
advocate　began　another　story　about　a　swindle；　and　all　sorts　of
crimes　committed　by　persons　in　high　places；　who；　instead　of　being
in　prison；　sat　on　presidential　chairs　in　all　sorts　of　Government
institutions。　These　tales；　of　which　the　advocate　seemed　to　have
an　unending　supply；　gave　him　much　pleasure；　showing　as　they　did；
with　perfect　clearness；　that　his　means　of　getting　money　were
quite　just　and　innocent　compared　to　the　means　which　the　highest
officials　in　Petersburg　made　use　of。　The　advocate　was　therefore
surprised　when　Nekhludoff　took　an　isvostchik　before　hearing　the
end　of　the　story；　said　good…bye；　and　left　him。　Nekhludoff　felt
very　sad。　It　was　chiefly　the　rejection　of　the　appeal　by　the
Senate；　confirming　the　senseless　torments　that　the　innocent
Maslova　was　enduring；　that　saddened　him；　and　also　the　fact　that
this　rejection　made　it　still　harder　for　him　to　unite　his　fate
with　hers。　The　stories　about　existing　evils；　which　the　advocate
recounted　with　such　relish；　heightened　his　sadness；　and　so　did
the　cold；　unkind　look　that　the　once　sweet…natured；　frank；　noble
Selenin　had　given　him；　and　which　kept　recurring　to　his　mind。

On　his　return　the　doorkeeper　handed　him　a　note；　and　said；　rather
scornfully；　that　some　kind　of　woman　had　written　it　in　the　hall。
It　was　a　note　from　Shoustova's　mother。　She　wrote　that　she　had
come　to　thank　her　daughter's　benefactor　and　saviour；　and　to
implore　him　to　come　to　see　them　on　the　Vasilievsky；　Sth　Line；
house　No。　。　This　was　very　necessary　because　of　Vera　Doukhova。
He　need　not　be　afraid　that　they　would　weary　him　with　expressions
of　gratitude。　They　would　not　speak　their　gratitude；　but　be　simply
glad　to　see　him。　Would　he　not　come　next　morning；　if　he　could？

There　was　another　note　from　Bogotyreff；　a　former　fellow…officer；
aide…de…camp　to　the　Emperor；　whom　Nekhludoff　had　asked　to　hand
personally　to　the　Emperor　his　petition　on　behalf　of　the
sectarians。　Bogotyreff　wrote；　in　his　large；　firm　hand；　that　he
would　put　the　petition　into　the　Emperor's　own　hands；　as　he　had
promised；　but　that　it　had　occurred　to　him　that　it　might　be　better
for　Nekhludoff　first　to　go　and　see　the　person　on　whom　the　matter
depended。

After　the　impressions　received　during　the　last　few　days；
Nekhludoff　felt　perfectly　hopeless　of　getting　anything　done。　The
plans　he　had　formed　in　Moscow　seemed　now　something　like　the
dreams　of　youth；　which　are　inevitably　followed　by　disillusion
when　life　comes　to　be　faced。　Still；　being　now　in　Petersburg；　he
considered　it　his　duty　to　do　all　he　had　intended；　and　he　resolved
next　day；　after　consulting　Bogotyreff；　to　act　on　his　advice　and
see　the　person　on　whom　the　case　of　the　sectarians　depended。

He　got　out　the　sectarians'　petition　from　his　portfolio；　and　began
reading　it　over；　when　there　was　a　knock　at　his　door；　and　a
footman　came　in　with　a　message　from　the　Countess　Katerina
Ivanovna；　who　asked　him　to　come　up　and　have　a　cup　of　tea　with
her。

Nekhludoff　said　he　would　come　at　once；　and　having　put　the　papers
back　into　the　portfolio；　he　went　up　to　his　aunt's。　He　looked　out
of　a　window　on　his　way；　and　saw　Mariette's　pair　of　bays　standing
in　front　of　the　house；　and　he　suddenly　brightened　and　felt
inclined　to　smile。

Mariette；　with　a　hat　on　her　head；　not　in　black　but　with　a　light
dress　of　many　shades；　sat　with　a　cup　in　her　hand　beside　the
Countess's　easy　chair；　prattling　about　something　while　her
beautiful；　laughing　eyes　glistened。　She　had　said　something
funnysomething　indecently　funnyjust　as　Nekhludoff　entered　the
room。　He　knew　it　by　the　way　she　laughed；　and　by　the　way　the
good…natured　Countess　Katerina　Ivanovna's　fat　body　was　shaking
with　laughter；　while　Mariette；　her　smiling　mouth　slightly　drawn
to　one　side；　her　head　a　little　bent；　a　peculiarly　mischievous
expression　in　her　merry；　energetic　face；　sat　silently　looking　at
her　companion。　From　a　few　words　which　he　overheard；　Nekhludoff
guessed　that　they　were　talking　of　the　second　piece　of　Petersburg
news；　the　episode　of　the　Siberian　Governor；　and　that　it　was　in
reference　to　this　subject　that　Mariette　had　said　something　so
funny　that　the　Countess　could　not　control　herself　for　a　long
time。

〃You　will　kill　me；〃　she　said；　coughing。

After　saying　〃How　d'you　do？〃　Nekhludoff　sat　down。　He　was　about　to
censure　Mariette　in　his　mind　for　her　levity　when；　noticing　the
serious　and　even　slightly　dissatisfied　look　in　his　eyes；　she
suddenly；　to　please　him；　changed　not　only　the　expression　of　her
face；　but　also　the　attitude　of　her　mind；　for　she　felt　the　wish　to
please　him　as　soon　as　she　looked　at　him。　She　suddenly　turned
serious；　dissatisfied　with　her　life；　as　if　seeking　and　striving
after　something；　it　was　not　that　she　pretended；　but　she　really
reproduced　in　herself　the　very　same　state　of　mind　that　he　was　in；
although　it　would　have　been　impossible　for　her　to　express　in
words　what　was　the　state　of　Nekhludoff's　mind　at　that　moment。

She　asked　him　how　he　had　accomplished　his　tasks。　He　told　her
about　his　failure　in　the　Senate　and　his　meeting　Selenin。

〃Oh；　what　a　pure　soul！　He　is；　indeed；　a　chevalier　sans　peur　et
sans　reproche。　A　pure　soul！〃　said　both　ladies；　using　the　epithet
commonly　applied　to　Selenin　in　Petersburg　society。

〃What　is　his　wife　like？〃　Nekhludoff　asked。

〃His　wife？　Well；　I　do　not　wish　to　judge；　but　she　does　not
understand　him。〃

〃Is　it　possible　that　he；　too；　was　for　rejecting　the　appeal？
Mariette　asked　with　real　sympathy。　〃It　is　dreadful。　How　sorry　I
am　for　her；〃　she　added　with　a　sigh。

He　frowned；　and　in　order　to　change　the　subject　began　to　speak
about　Shoustova；　who　had　been　imprisoned　in　the　fortress　and　was
now　set　free　through　the　influence　of　Mariette's　husband。　He
thanked　her　for　her　trouble；　and　was　going　on　to　say　how　dreadful
he　thought　it；　that　this　woman　and　the　whole　of　her　family　had
suffered　merely；　because　no　one　had　reminded　the　authorities
about　them；　but　Mariette　interrupted　him　and　expressed　her　own
indignation。

〃Say　nothing　about　it　to　me；〃　she　said。　〃When　my　husband　told　me
she　could　be　set　free；　it　was　this　that　struck　me；　'What　was　she
kept　in　prison　for　if　she　is　innocent？'〃　She　went　on　expressing
what　Nekhludoff　was　about　to　say。

〃It　is　revoltingrevolting。〃

Countess　Katerina　Ivanovna　noticed　that　Mariette　was　coquetting
with　her　nephew；　and　this　amused　her。　〃What　do　you　think？〃　she
said；　when　they　were　silent。　〃Supposing　you　come　to　Aline's
to…morrow　night。　Kiesewetter　will　be　there。　And　you；　too；〃　she
said；　turning　to　Mariette。　〃Il　vous　a　remarque；〃　she　went　on　to
her　nephew。　〃He　told　me　that　what　you　say　（I　repeated　it　all　to
him）　is　a　very　good　sign；　and　that　you　will　certainly　come　to
Christ。　You　must　come　absolutely。　Tell　him　to；　Mariette；　and　come
yourself。〃

〃Countess；　in　the　first　place；　I　have　no　right　whatever　to　give
any　kind　of　advice　to　the　Prince；〃　said　Mariette；　and　gave
Nekhludoff　a　look　that　somehow　established　a　full　comprehension
between　them　of　their　attitude　in　relation　to　the　Countess's
words　and　evangelicalism　in　general。　〃Secondly；　I　do　not　much
care；　you　know。〃

Yes；　I　know　you　always　do　things　the　wrong　way　round；　and
according　to　your　own　ideas。〃

〃My　own　ideas？　I　have　faith　like　the　most　simple　peasant　woman；〃
said　Mariette　with　a　smile。　〃And；　thirdly；　I　am　going　to　the
French　Theatre　to…morrow　night。〃

〃Ah！　And　have　you　seen　thatWhat's　her　name？〃　asked　Countess