memoirs of carwin the biloquist-第7章

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series　of　heroic　labours。　　Hitherto　every　new　stage　in　my　intellectual　progress　had　added　vigour　to　his　hopes；　and　he　cherished　a　stronger　belief　than　formerly　that　my　career　would　terminate　auspiciously。　　This；　however；　was　necessarily　distant。　Many　preliminaries　must　first　be　settled；　many　arduous　accomplishments　be　first　obtained；　and　my　virtue　be　subjected　to　severe　trials。　　At　present　it　was　not　in　his　power　to　be　more　explicit；　but　if　my　reflections　suggested　no　better　plan；　he　advised　me　to　settle　my　affairs　in　Spain；　and　return　to　him　immediately。　　My　knowledge　of　this　country　would　be　of　the　highest　use；　on　the　supposition　of　my　ultimately　arriving　at　the　honours　to　which　he　had　alluded；　and　some　of　these　preparatory　measures　could　be　taken　only　with　his　assistance；　and　in　his　company。

This　intimation　was　eagerly　obeyed；　and；　in　a　short　time；　I　arrived　at　Dublin。　　Meanwhile　my　mind　had　copious　occupation　in　commenting　on　my　friend's　letter。　　This　scheme；　whatever　it　was；　seemed　to　be　suggested　by　my　mention　of　a　plan　of　colonization；　and　my　preference　of　that　mode　of　producing　extensive　and　permanent　effects　on　the　condition　of　mankind。　　It　was　easy　therefore　to　conjecture　that　this　mode　had　been　pursued　under　some　mysterious　modifications　and　conditions。

It　had　always　excited　my　wonder　that　so　obvious　an　expedient　had　been　overlooked。　　The　globe　which　we　inhabit　was　very　imperfectly　known。　　The　regions　and　nations　unexplored；　it　was　reasonable　to　believe；　surpassed　in　extent；　and　perhaps　in　populousness；　those　with　which　we　were　familiar。　　The　order　of　Jesuits　had　furnished　an　example　of　all　the　errors　and　excellencies　of　such　a　scheme。　　Their　plan　was　founded　on　erroneous　notions　of　religion　and　policy；　and　they　had　absurdly　chosen　a　scene*　within　reach　of　the　injustice　and　ambition　of　an　European　tyrant。

It　was　wise　and　easy　to　profit　by　their　example。　　Resting　on　the　two　props　of　fidelity　and　zeal；　an　association　might　exist　for　ages　in　the　heart　of　Europe；　whose　influence　might　be　felt；　and　might　be　boundless；　in　some　region　of　the　southern　hemisphere；　and　by　whom　a　moral　and　political　structure　might　be　raised；　the　growth　of　pure　wisdom；　and　totally　unlike　those　fragments　of　Roman　and　Gothic　barbarism；　which　cover　the　face　of　what　are　called　the　civilized　nations。　　The　belief　now　rose　in　my　mind　that　some　such　scheme　had　actually　been　prosecuted；　and　that　Ludloe　was　a　coadjutor。　　On　this　supposition；　the　caution　with　which　he　approached　to　his　point；　the　arduous　probation　which　a　candidate　for　a　part　on　this　stage　must　undergo；　and　the　rigours　of　that　test　by　which　his　fortitude　and　virtue　must　be　tried；　were　easily　explained。　　I　was　too　deeply　imbued　with　veneration　for　the　effects　of　such　schemes；　and　too　sanguine　in　my　confidence　in　the　rectitude　of　Ludloe；　to　refuse　my　concurrence　in　any　scheme　by　which　my　qualifications　might　at　length　be　raised　to　a　due　point。

Our　interview　was　frank　and　affectionate。　　I　found　him　situated　just　as　formerly。　　His　aspect；　manners；　and　deportment　were　the　same。　　I　entered　once　more　on　my　former　mode　of　life；　but　our　intercourse　became　more　frequent。　　We　constantly　breakfasted　together；　and　our　conversation　was　usually　prolonged　through　half　the　morning。

For　a　time　our　topics　were　general。　　I　thought　proper　to　leave　to　him　the　introduction　of　more　interesting　themes：　　this；　however；　he　betrayed　no　inclination　to　do。　　His　reserve　excited　some　surprise；　and　I　began　to　suspect　that　whatever　design　he　had　formed　with　regard　to　me；　had　been　laid　aside。　　To　ascertain　this　question；　I　ventured；　at　length；　to　recall　his　attention　to　the　subject　of　his　last　letter；　and　to　enquire　whether　subsequent　reflection　had　made　any　change　in　his　views。

He　said　that　his　views　were　too　momentous　to　be　hastily　taken　up；　or　hastily　dismissed；　the　station；　my　attainment　of　which　depended　wholly　on　myself；　was　high　above　vulgar　heads；　and　was　to　be　gained　by　years　of　solicitude　and　labour。　　This；　at　least；　was　true　with　regard　to　minds　ordinarily　constituted；　I；　perhaps；　deserved　to　be　regarded　as　an　exception；　and　might　be　able　to　accomplish　in　a　few　months　that　for　which　others　were　obliged　to　toil　during　half　their　lives。

Man；　continued　he；　is　the　slave　of　habit。　　Convince　him　to…day　that　his　duty　leads　straight　forward：　　he　shall　advance；　but　at　every　step　his　belief　shall　fade；　habit　will　resume　its　empire；　and　tomorrow　he　shall　turn　back；　or　betake　himself　to　oblique　paths。

We　know　not　our　strength　till　it　be　tried。　　Virtue；　till　confirmed　by　habit；　is　a　dream。　　You　are　a　man　imbued　by　errors；　and　vincible　by　slight　temptations。　　Deep　enquiries　must　bestow　light　on　your　opinions；　and　the　habit　of　encountering　and　vanquishing　temptation　must　inspire　you　with　fortitude。　　Till　this　be　done；　you　are　unqualified　for　that　post；　in　which　you　will　be　invested　with　divine　attributes；　and　prescribe　the　condition　of　a　large　portion　of　mankind。

Confide　not　in　the　firmness　of　your　principles；　or　the　stedfastness　of　your　integrity。　　Be　always　vigilant　and　fearful。　Never　think　you　have　enough　of　knowledge；　and　let　not　your　caution　slumber　for　a　moment；　for　you　know　not　when　danger　is　near。

I　acknowledged　the　justice　of　his　admonitions；　and　professed　myself　willing　to　undergo　any　ordeal　which　reason　should　prescribe。　What；　I　asked；　were　the　conditions；　on　the　fulfilment　of　which　depended　my　advancement　to　the　station　he　alluded　to？　　Was　it　necessary　to　conceal　from　me　the　nature　and　obligations　of　this　rank？

These　enquiries　sunk　him　more　profoundly　into　meditation　than　I　had　ever　before　witnessed。　　After　a　pause；　in　which　some　perplexity　was　visible；　he　answered：

I　scarcely　know　what　to　say。　　As　to　promises；　I　claim　them　not　from　you。　　We　are　now　arrived　at　a　point；　in　which　it　is　necessary　to　look　around　with　caution；　and　that　consequences　should　be　fully　known。　　A　number　of　persons　are　leagued　together　for　an　end　of　some　moment。　　To　make　yourself　one　of　these　is　submitted　to　your　choice。　Among　the　conditions　of　their　alliance　are　mutual　fidelity　and　secrecy。

Their　existence　depends　upon　this：　　their　existence　is　known　only　to　themselves。　　This　secrecy　must　be　obtained　by　all　the　means　which　are　possible。　　When　I　have　said　thus　much；　I　have　informed　you；　in　some　degree；　of　their　existence；　but　you　are　still　ignorant　of　the　purpose　contemplated　by　this　association；　and　of　all　the　members；　except　myself。　　So　far　no　dangerous　disclosure　is　yet　made：　　but　this　degree　of　concealment　is　not　sufficient。　　Thus　much　is　made　known　to　you；　because　it　is　unavoidable。　　The　individuals　which　compose　this　fraternity　are　not　immortal；　and　the　vacancies　occasioned　by　death　must　be　supplied　from　among　the　living。　　The　candidate　must　be　instructed　and　prepared；　and　they　are　always　at　liberty　to　recede。　　Their　reason　must　approve　the　obligations　and　duties　of　their　station；　or　they　are　unfit　for　it。　　If　they　recede；　one　duty　is　still　incumbent　upon　them：　　they　must　observe　an　inviolable　silence。　　To　this　they　are　not　held　by　any　promise。　They　must　weigh　consequences；　and　freely　decide；　but　they　must　not　fail　to　number　among　these　consequences　their　own　death。

Their　death　will　not　be　prompted　by　vengeance。　　The　executioner　will　say；　he　that　has　once　revealed　the　tale　is　likely　to　reveal　it　a　second　time；　and；　to　prevent　this；　the　betrayer　must　die。　　Nor　is　this　the　only　consequence：　　to　prevent　the　further　revelation；　he；　to　whom　the　secret　was　imparted；　must　likewise　perish。　　He　must　not　console　himself　with　the　belief　that　his　trespass　will　be　unknown。　　The　knowledge　cannot；　by　human　means；　be　withheld　from　this　fraternity。　　Rare；　indeed；　will　it　be　that　his　purpose　to　disclose　is　not　discovered　before　it　can　be　effected；　and　the　disclosure　prevented　by　his　death。

Be　well　aware　of　your　condition。　　What　I　now；　or　may　hereafter　mention；　mention　not　again。　　Admit　not　even　a　doubt　as　to　the　propriety　of　hiding　it　from　all　the　world。　　There　are　eyes　who　will　discern　this　doubt　amidst　the　closest　folds　of　your　heart；　and　your　life　will　instantly　be　sacrificed。

At　present　be　the　subject　dismissed。　　Reflect　deeply　on　the　duty　which　you　have　already　incurred。　　Think　upon　your　strength　of　mind；　and　be　careful　not　to　lay　yourself　under　impracticable　obligations。　　It　will　always　be　in　your　power　to　recede。　　Even　after　you　are　solemnly　enrolled　a　member；　you　may　consult　the　dictates　of　your　own　understanding；　and　relinquish　your　post；　but　while　you　live；　the　obligation　to　be　silent　will　perpetually　attend　you。

We　seek　not　the　misery　or　death　of　any　one；　but　we　are　swayed　by　an　immutable　calculation。　　Death　is　to　be　abhorred；　but　the　life　of　the　betrayer　is　productive　of　more　evil　than　his　death：　　his　death；　therefore；　we　chuse；　and　our　means　are　instantaneous　and　unerring。

I　love　you。　　The　first　impulse　of　my　love　is　to　dissuade　you　from　seeking　to　know　more。　　Your　mind　will　be　full　of　ideas；　your　hands　will　be　perpetually　busy　to　a　purpose　into　which　no　human　creature；　beyond　the　verge　of　your　brotherhood；　must　pry。　　Believe　me；　who　have　made　the　experiment；　that　compared　with　this　task；　the　task　of　inviolable　secrecy；　all　others　are　easy。　　To　be　dumb　will　not　suffice；　never　to　know　any　remission　in　your　zeal　or　your　watchfulness　will　not　suffice。　　If　the　sagacity　of　others　detect　your　occupations；　however　strenuously　you　may　labour　for　concealment；　your　doom　is　ratified；　as　well　as　that　of　the　wretch　whose　evil　destiny　led　him　to　pursue　you。

Yet　if　your　fidelity　fail　not；　great　will　be　your　recompence。　For　all　your　toils　and　self…devotion；　ample　will　be　the　retribution。　　Hitherto　you　have　been　wrapt　in　darkness　and　storm；　then　will　you　be　exalted　to　a　pure　and　unruffled　element。　　It　is　only　for　a　time　that　temptation　will　environ　you；　and　your　path　will　be　toilsome。　　In　a　few　years　you　will　be　permitted　to　withdraw　to　a　land　of　sages；　and　the　remainder　of　your　life　will　glide　away　in　the　enjoyments　of　beneficence　and　wisdom。

Think　deeply　on　what　I　have　said。　　Investigate　your　own　motives　and　opinions；　and　prepare　to　submit　them　to　the　test　of　numerous　hazards　and　experiments。

Here　my　friend　passed　to　a　new　topic。　　I　was　desirous　of　reverting　to　this　subject；　and　obtaining　further　information　concerning　it；　but　he　assiduously　repelled　all　my　attempts；　and　insisted　on　my　bestowing　deep　and　impartial　attention　on　what　had　already　been　disclosed。　　I　was　not　slow　to　comply　with　his　directions。　　My　mind　refused　to　admit　any　other　theme　of　contemplation　than　this。

As　yet　I　had　no　glimpse　of　the　nature　of　this　fraternity。　　I　was　permitted　to　form　conjectures；　and　previous　incidents　bestowed　but　one　form　upon　my　thoughts。　　In　reviewing　the　sentiments　and　deportment　of　Ludloe；　my　belief　continually　acquired　new　strength。　I　even　recollected　hints　and　ambiguous　allusions　in　his　discourse；　which　were　easily　solved；　on　the　supposition　of　the　existence　of　a　new　model　of　society；　in　some　unsuspected　corner　of　the　world。

I　did　not　fully　perceive　the　necessity　of　secrecy；　but　this　necessity　perhaps　would　be　rendered　apparent；　when　I　should　come　to　know　the　connection　that　subsisted　between　Europe　and　this　imaginary　colony。　　But　what　was　to　be　done？　　I　was　willing　to　abide　by　these　conditions。　　My　understandin