over the teacups-第25章

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steam…engine　be　without　a　crank？　　I　suppose　the　first　fool　that

looked　on　the　first　crank　that　was　ever　made　asked　what　that　crooked；

queer…looking　thing　was　good　for。　　When　the　wheels　got　moving　he

found　out。　　Tell　us　something　about　that　book　which　has　so　much　to

say　concerning　cranks。〃



Hereupon　I　requested　Delilah　to　carry　back　Morhof；　and　replace　him　in

the　wide　gap　he　had　left　in　the　bookshelf。　　She　was　then　to　find　and

bring　down　the　volume　I　had　been　speaking　of。



Delilah　took　the　wisdom　of　the　seventeenth　century　in　her　arms；　and

departed　on　her　errand。　　The　book　she　brought　down　was　given　me　some

years　ago　by　a　gentleman　who　had　sagaciously　foreseen　that　it　was

just　one　of　those　works　which　I　might　hesitate　about　buying；　but

should　be　well　pleased　to　own。　　He　guessed　well；　the　book　has　been　a

great　source　of　instruction　and　entertainment　to　me。　　I　wonder　that

so　much　time　and　cost　should　have　been　expended　upon　a　work　which

might　have　borne　a　title　like　the　Encomium　Moriae　of　Erasmus；　and　yet

it　is　such　a　wonderful　museum　of　the　productions　of　the　squinting

brains　belonging　to　the　class　of　persons　commonly　known　as　cranks

that　we　could　hardly　spare　one　of　its　five　hundred　octavo　pages。



Those　of　us　who　are　in　the　habit　of　receiving　letters　from　all　sorts

of　would…be…literary　peopleletters　of　inquiry；　many　of　them　with

reference　to　matters　we　are　supposed　to　understandcan　readily　see

how　it　was　that　Mr。　De　Morgan；　never　too　busy　to　be　good…natured　with

the　people　who　pesteredor　amused…him　with　their　queer　fancies；

received　such　a　number　of　letters　from　persons　who　thought　they　had

made　great　discoveries；　from　those　who　felt　that　they　and　their

inventions　and　contrivances　had　been　overlooked；　and　who　sought　in

his　large　charity　of　disposition　and　great　receptiveness　a　balm　for

their　wounded　feelings　and　a　ray　of　hope　for　their　darkened

prospects。



The　book　before　us　is　made　up　from　papers　published　in　〃The

Athenaeum；〃　with　additions　by　the　author。　　Soon　after　opening　it　we

come　to　names　with　which　we　are　familiar；　the　first　of　these；　that　of

Cornelius　Agrippa；　being　connected　with　the　occult　and　mystic

doctrines　dealt　with　by　many　of　De　Morgan's　correspondents。　　But　the

name　most　likely　to　arrest　us　is　that　of　Giordano　Bruno；　the　same

philosopher；　heretic；　and　martyr　whose　statue　has　recently　been

erected　in　Rome；　to　the　great　horror　of　the　Pope　and　his　prelates　in

the　Old　World　and　in　the　New。　　De　Morgan's　pithy　account　of　him　will

interest　the　company　：　〃Giordano　Bruno　was　all　paradox。　　He　was；　as

has　been　said；　a　vorticist　before　Descartes；　an　optimist　before

Leibnitz；　a　Copernican　before　Galileo。　　It　would　be　easy　to　collect　a

hundred　strange　opinions　of　his。　　He　was　born　about　1550；　and　was

roasted　alive　at　Rome；　February　17；　1600；　for　the　maintenance　and

defence　of　the　Holy　Church；　and　the　rights　and　liberties　of　the

same。〃



Number　Seven　could　not　contain　himself　when　the　reading　had　reached

this　point。　　He　rose　from　his　chair；　and　tinkled　his　spoon　against

the　side　of　his　teacup。　　It　may　have　been　a　fancy；　but　I　thought　it

returned　a　sound　which　Mr。　Richard　Briggs　would　have　recognized　as

implying　an　organic　defect。　　But　Number　Seven　did　not　seem　to　notice

it；　or；　if　be　did；　to　mind　it。



〃Why　did　n't　we　all　have　a　chance　to　help　erect　that　statue？〃　he

cried。　　〃A　murdered　heretic　at　the　beginning　of　the　seventeenth

century；　a　hero　of　knowledge　in　the　nineteenth；I　drink　to　the

memory　of　the　roasted　crank；　Giordano　Bruno！〃



Number　Seven　lifted　his　teacup　to　his　lips；　and　most　of　us　followed

his　example。



After　this　outburst　of　emotion　and　eloquence　had　subsided；　and　the

teaspoons　lay　quietly　in　their　saucers；　I　went　on　with　my　extract

from　the　book　I　had　in　hand。



I　think；　I　said；　that　the　passage　which　follows　will　be　new　and

instructive　to　most　of　the　company。　　De　Morgan's　interpretation　of

the　cabalistic　sentence；　made　up　as　you　will　find　it；　is　about　as

ingenious　a　piece　of　fanciful　exposition　as　you　will　be　likely　to

meet　with　anywhere　in　any　book；　new　or　old。　　I　am　the　more　willing　to

mention　it　as　it　suggests　a　puzzle　which　some　of　the　company　may　like

to　work　upon。　　Observe　the　character　and　position　of　the　two

distinguished　philosophers　who　did　not　think　their　time　thrown　away

in　laboring　at　this　seemingly　puerile　task。



〃There　is　a　kind　of　Cabbala　Alphabetica　which　the　investigators　of

the　numerals　in　words　would　do　well　to　take　up；　it　is　the　formation

of　sentences　which　contain　all　the　letters　of　the　alphabet；　and　each

only　once。　　No　one　has　done　it　with　v　and　j　treated　as　consonants；

but　you　and　I　can　do　it。　　Dr。　Whewell　and　I　amused　ourselves　some

years　ago　with　attempts。　　He　could　not　make　sense；　though　he　joined

words　he　gave　me　Phiz；　styx；　wrong；　buck；　flame；　quiz。



〃I　gave　him　the　following；　which　he　agreed　was　'admirable　sense；'

I　certainly　think　the　words　would　never　have　come　together　except　in

this　way：　I　quartz　pyx　who　fling　muck　beds。　　I　long　thought　that　no

human　being　could　say　this　under　any　circumstances。　　At　last　I

happened　to　be　reading　a　religious　writer；as　he　thought　himself；

who　threw　aspersions　on　his　opponents　thick　and　threefold。　　Heyday

came　into　my　head；　this　fellow　flings　muck　beds；　he　must　be　a　quartz

pyx。　　And　then　I　remembered　that　a　pyx　is　a　sacred　vessel；　and　quartz

is　a　hard　stone；　as　hard　as　the　heart　of　a　religious　foe…curser。　　So

that　the　line　is　the　motto　of　the　ferocious　sectarian　who　turns　his

religious　vessels　into　mud…holders；　for　the　benefit　of　those　who　will

not　see　what　he　sees。〃



There　are　several　other　sentences　given；　in　which　all　the　letters

（except　v　and　j　as　consonants）　are　employed；　of　which　the　following

is　the　best：　Get　nymph；　quiz　sad　brow；　fix　luck；which　in　more　sober

English　would　be；　Marry；　be　cheerful；　watch　your　business。　　There　is

more　edification；　mare　religion；　in　this　than　in　all　the　666

interpretations　put　together。〃



There　is　something　very　pleasant　in　the　thought　of　these　two　sages

playing　at　jackstraws　with　the　letters　of　the　alphabet。　　The　task

which　De　Morgan　and　Dr。　Whewell；　〃the　omniscient；〃　set　themselves

would　not　be　unworthy　of　our　own　ingenious　scholars；　and　it　might　be

worth　while　for　some　one　of　our　popular　periodicals　to　offer　a　prize

for　the　best　sentence　using　up　the　whole　alphabet；　under　the　same

conditions　as　those　submitted　to　by　our　two　philosophers。



This　whole　book　of　De　Morgan's　seems　to　me　full　of　instruction。

There　is　too　much　of　it；　no　doubt；　yet　one　can　put　up　with　the

redundancy　for　the　sake　of　the　multiplicity　of　shades　of　credulity

and　self…deception　it　displays　in　broad　daylight。　　I　suspect　many　of

us　are　conscious　of　a　second　personality　in　our　complex　nature；　which

has　many　traits　resembling　those　found　in　the　writers　of　the　letters

addressed　to　Mr。　De　Horgan。



I　have　not　ventured　very　often　nor　very　deeply　into　the　field　of

metaphysics；　but　if　I　were　disposed　to　make　any　claim　in　that

direction；　it　would　be　the　recognition　of　the　squinting　brain；　the

introduction　of　the　term　〃cerebricity〃　corresponding　to　electricity；

the　idiotic　area　in　the　brain　or　thinking…marrow；　and　my　studies　of

the　second　member　in　the　partnership　of　I…My…Self　&　Co。　　I　add　the

Co。　with　especial　reference　to　a　very　interesting　article　in　a　late

Scribner；　by　my　friend　Mr。　William　James。　　In　this　article　the　reader

will　find　a　full　exposition　of　the　doctrine　of　plural　personality

illustrated　by　striking　cases。　　I　have　long　ago　noticed　and　referred

to　the　fact　of　the　stratification　of　the　currents　of　thought　in　three

layers；　one　over　the　other。　　I　have　recognized　that　where　there　are

two　individuals　talking　together　there　are　really　six　personalities

engaged　in　the　conversation。　　But　the　distinct；　separable；

independent　individualities；　taking　up　conscious　life　one　after　the

other；　are　brought　out　by　Mr。　James　and　the　authorities　to　which　he

refers　as　I　have　not　elsewhere　seen　them　developed。



Whether　we　shall　ever　find　the　exact　position　of　the　idiotic　centre

or　area　in　the　brain　（if　such　a　spot　exists）　is　uncertain。　　We　know

exactly　where　the　blind　spot　of　the　eye　is　situated；　and　can

demonstrate　it　anatomically　and　physiologically。　　But　we　have　only

analogy　to　lead　us　to　infer　the　possible　or　even　probable　existence

of　an　insensible　spot　in　the　thinking…centre。　　If　there　is　a　focal

point　where　consciousness　is　at　its　highest　development；　it　would　not

be　strange　if　near　by　there　should　prove　to　be　an　anaesthetic

district　or　limited　space　where　no　report　from　the　senses　was

intelligently　interpreted。　　But　all　this　is　mere　hypothesis。



Notwithstanding　the　fact　that　I　am　nominally　the　head　personage　of

the　circle　of　Teacups；　I　do　not　pretend　or　wish　to　deny　that　we　all

look　to　Number　Five　as　our　chief　adviser　in　all　the　literary

questions　that　come　before　us。　　She　reads　more　and　better　than　any　of

us。　　She　is　always　ready　to　welcome　the　first　sign　of　genius；　or　of

talent　which　approaches　genius。　　She　makes　short　work　with　all　the

pretenders　whose　only　excuse　for　appealing　to　the　public　is　that　they

〃want　to　be　famous。〃　　She　is　one　of　the　very　few　persons　to　whom　I　am

willing　to　read　any　one　of　my　own　productions　while　it　is　yet　in

manuscript；　unpublished。　　I　know　she　is　disposed　to　make　more　of　it

than　it　deserves；　but；　on　the　other　hand；　there　are　degrees　in　her

scale　of　judgment；　and　I　can　distinguish　very　easily　what　delights

her　from　what　pleases　only；　or　is；　except　for　her　kindly　feeling　to

the　writer；　indifferent；　or　open　to　severe　comment。　　What　is　curious

is　that　she　seems　to　have　no　literary　aspirations；　no　desire　to　be

known　as　a　writer。　　Yet　Number　Five　has　more　esprit；　more　sparkle；

more　sense　in　her　talk；　than　many　a　famous　authoress　from　whom　we

should　expect　brilliant　conversation。



There　are　mysteries　about　Number　Five。　　I　am　not　going　to　describe

her　personally。　　Whether　she　belongs　naturally　among　the　bright　young

people；　or　in　the　company　of　the　maturer　persons；　who　have　had　a　good

deal　of　experience　of　the　world；　and　have　reached　the　wisdom　of　the

riper　decades　without　losing　the　graces　of　the　earlier　ones；　it　would

be　hard　to　say。　　The　men　and　women；　young　and　old；　who　throng　about

her　forget　their　own　ages。　　〃There　is　no　such　thing　as　time　in　her

presence；〃　said　the　Professor；　the　other　day；　in　speaking　of　her。

Whether　the　Professor　is　in　love　with　her　or　not　is　more　than　I　can

say；　but　I　am　sure　that　he　goes　to　her　for　literary　sympathy　and

counsel；　just　as　I　do。　　The　reader　may　remember　what　Number　Five　said

about　the　possibility　of　her　getting　a　sprained　ankle；　and　her　asking

the　young　Doctor　whether　he　felt　equal　to　taking　charge　of　her　if　she

did。　　I　would　not　for　the　world　insinuate　that　he　wishes　she　would

slip　and　twist　her　foot　a　little；just　a　little；　you　know；　but　so

that　it