annajanska, the bolshevik empress-第2章

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tight　to　the　Grand　Duchess　with　one　hand；　produces　papers　with
the　other；　and　waves　them　towards　Schneidekind；　who　takes　them
from　him　and　passes　them　on　to　the　General。　He　opens　them　and
reads　them　with　a　grave　expression。

SCHNEIDEKIN。　Be　good　enough　to　wait；　prisoner；　until　the　General
has　read　the　papers　on　your　case。

THE　GRAND　DUCHESS　＇to　the　soldiers＇。　Let　go。　＇To　Strammfest＇。
Tell　them　to　let　go；　or　I'll　upset　the　bench　backwards　and　bash
our　three　heads　on　the　floor。

FIRST　SOLDIER。　No；　little　mother。　Have　mercy　on　the　poor。

STRAMMFEST　＇growling　over　the　edge　of　the　paper　he　is　reading＇。
Hold　your　tongue。

THE　GRAND　DUCHESS　＇blazing＇。　Me；　or　the　soldier？

STRAMMFEST　＇horrified＇。　The　soldier；　madam。

THE　GRAND　DUCHESS。　Tell　him　to　let　go。

STRAMMFEST。　Release　the　lady。

The　soldiers　take　their　hands　off　her。　One　of　them　wipes　his
fevered　brow。　The　other　sucks　his　wrist。

SCHNEIDKIND　＇fiercely＇。　'ttention！

The　two　soldiers　sit　up　stiffly。

THE　GRAND　DUCHESS。　Oh；　let　the　poor　man　suck　his　wrist。　It　may　be
poisoned。　I　bit　it。

STRAMMFEST　＇shocked＇。　You　bit　a　common　soldier！

GRAND　DUCHESS。　Well；　I　offered　to　cauterize　it　with　the　poker　in
the　office　stove。　But　he　was　afraid。　What　more　could　I　do？

SCHNEIDEKIND。　Why　did　you　bite　him；　prisoner？

THE　GRAND　DUCHESS。　He　would　not　let　go。

STRAMMFEST。　Did　he　let　go　when　you　bit　him？

THE　GRAND　DUCHESS。　No。　＇Patting　the　soldier　on　the　back＇。　You
should　give　the　man　a　cross　for　his　devotion。　I　could　not　go　on
eating　him；　so　I　brought　him　along　with　me。

STRAMMFEST。　Prisoner

THE　GRAND　DUCHESS。　Don't　call　me　prisoner；　General　Strammfest。　My
grandmother　dandled　you　on　her　knee。

STRAMMFEST　＇bursting　into　tears＇。　O　God；　yes。　Believe　me；　my
heart　is　what　it　was　then。

THE　GRAND　DUCHESS。　Your　brain　also　is　what　it　was　then。　I　will
not　be　addressed　by　you　as　prisoner。

STRAMMFEST。　I　may　not；　for　your　own　sake；　call　you　by　your
rightful　and　most　sacred　titles。　What　am　I　to　call　you？

THE　GRAND　DUCHESS。　The　Revolution　has　made　us　comrades。　Call　me
comrade。

STRAMMFEST。　I　had　rather　die。

THE　GRAND　DUCHESS。　Then　call　me　Annajanska；　and　I　will　call　you
Peter　Piper；　as　grandmamma　did。

STRAMMFEST　＇painfully　agitated＇。　Schneidekind；　you　must　speak　to
her：　I　cannot＇he　breaks　down。＇

SCHNEIDEKIND　＇officially＇。　The　Republic　of　Beotia　has　been
compelled　to　confine　the　Panjandrum　and　his　family；　for　their　own
safety；　within　certain　bounds。　You　have　broken　those　bounds。

STRAMMFEST　＇taking　the　word　from　him＇。　You　are　I　must　say　ita
prisoner。　What　am　I　to　do　with　you？

THE　GRAND　DUCHESS。　You　should　have　thought　of　that　before　you
arrested　me。

STRAMMFEST。　Come；　come；　prisoner！　do　you　know　what　will　happen　to
you　if　you　compel　me　to　take　a　sterner　tone　with　you？

THE　GRAND　DUCHESS。　No。　But　I　know　what　will　happen　to　you。

STRAMAIFEST。　Pray　what；　prisoner？

THE　GLAND　DUCHESS。　Clergyman's　sore　throat。

Schneidekind　splutters；　drops　a　paper：　and　conceals　his　laughter
under　the　table。

STRAMMFEST　＇thunderously＇。　Lieutenant　Schneidekind。

SCHNEIDEKIND　＇in　a　stifled　voice＇。　Yes；　Sir。　＇The　table　vibrates
visibly。＇

STRAMMFEST。　Come　out　of　it；　you　fool：　you're　upsetting　the　ink。

Schneidekind　emerges；　red　in　the　face　with　suppressed　mirth。

STRAMMFEST。　Why　don't　you　laugh？　Don't　you　appreciate　Her
Imperial　Highness's　joke？

SCHNEIDEKIND　＇suddenly　becoming　solemn＇。　I　don't　want　to；　sir。

STRAMMFEST。　Laugh　at　once；　sir。　I　order　you　to　laugh。

SCHNEIDEKIND　＇with　a　touch　of　temper＇。　I　really　can't；　sir。　＇He
sits　down　decisively。＇

STRAMMFEST　＇growling　at　him＇。　Yah！　＇He　turns　impressively　to　the
Grand　Duchess。＇　Your　Imperial　Highness　desires　me　to　address　you
as　comrade？

THE　GRAND　DUCHESS　＇rising　and　waving　a　red　handkerchief＇。　Long
live　the　Revolution；　comrade！

STRAMMFEST　＇rising　and　saluting＇。　Proletarians　of　all　lands；
unite。　Lieutenant　Schneidekind；　you　will　rise　and　sing　the
Marseillaise。

SCHNEIDEKIND　＇rising＇。　But　I　cannot；　sir。　I　have　no　voice；　no
ear。

STRAMMFEST。　Then　sit　down；　and　bury　your　shame　in　your
typewriter。　＇Schneidekind　sits　down。＇　Comrade　Annajanska；　you
have　eloped　with　a　young　officer。

THE　GRAND　DUCHESS　＇astounded＇。　General　Strammfest；　you　lie。

STRAMMFEST。　Denial；　comrade；　is　useless。　It　is　through　that
officer　that　your　movements　have　been　traced。　＇The　Grand　Duchess
is　suddenly　enlightened；　and　seems　amused。　Strammfest　continues
an　a　forensic　manner。＇　He　joined　you　at　the　Golden　Anchor　in
Hakonsburg。　You　gave　us　the　slip　there；　but　the　officer　was
traced　to　Potterdam；　where　you　rejoined　him　and　went　alone　to
Premsylople。　What　have　you　done　with　that　unhappy　young　man？
Where　is　he？

THE　GRAND　DUCHESS　＇pretending　to　whisper　an　important　secret＇。
Where　he　has　always　been。

STRAMMFEST　＇eagerly＇。　Where　is　that？

THE　GRAND　DUCHESS　＇impetuously＇。　In　your　imagination。　I　came
alone。　I　am　alone。　Hundreds　of　officers　travel　every　day　from
Hakonsburg　to　Potterdam。　What　do　I　know　about　them？

STRAMMFEST。　They　travel　in　khaki。　They　do　not　travel　in　full
dress　court　uniform　as　this　man　did。

SCHNEIDEKIND。　Only　officers　who　are　eloping　with　grand　duchesses
wear　court　uniform：　otherwise　the　grand　duchesses　could　not　be
seen　with　them。

STRAMMFEST。　Hold　your　tongue。　＇Schneidekind；　in　high　dudgeon；
folds　his　arms　and　retires　from　the　conversation。　The　General
returns　to　his　paper　and　to　his　examination　of　the　Grand
Duchess。＇　This　officer　travelled　with　your　passport。　What　have
you　to　say　to　that？

THE　GRAND　DUCHESS。　Bosh！　How　could　a　man　travel　with　a　woman's
passport？

STRAMMFEST。　It　is　quite　simple；　as　you　very　well　know。　A　dozen
travellers　arrive　at　the　boundary。　The　official　collects　their
passports。　He　counts　twelve　persons；　then　counts　the　passports。
If　there　are　twelve；　he　is　satisfied。

THE　GRAND　DUCHESS。　Then　how　do　you　know　that　one　of　the　passports
was　mine？

STRAMMFEST。　A　waiter　at　the　Potterdam　Hotel　looked　at　the
officer's　passport　when　he　was　in　his　bath。　It　was　your　passport。

THE　GRAND　DUCHESS。　Stuff！　Why　did　he　not　have　me　arrested？

STRAMMFEST。　When　the　waiter　returned　to　the　hotel　with　the　police
the　officer　had　vanished；　and　you　were　there　with　your　own
passport。　They　knouted　him。

THE　GRAND　DUCHESS。　Oh！　Strammfest；　send　these　men　away。　I　must
speak　to　you　alone。

STRAMMFEST　＇rising　in　horror＇。　No：　this　is　the　last　straw：　I
cannot　consent。　It　is　impossible；　utterly；　eternally　impossible；
that　a　daughter　of　the　Imperial　House　should　speak　to　any　one
alone；　were　it　even　her　own　husband。

THE　GRAND　DUCHESS。　You　forget　that　there　is　an　exception。　She　may
speak　to　a　child　alone。　＇She　rises。＇　Strammfest；　you　have　been
dandled　on　my　grandmother's　knee。　By　that　gracious　action　the
dowager　Panjandrina　made　you　a　child　forever。　So　did　Nature；　by
the　way。　I　order　you　to　speak　to　me　alone。　Do　you　hear？　I　order
you。　For　seven　hundred　years　no　member　of　your　family　has　ever
disobeyed　an　order　from　a　member　of　mine。　Will　you　disobey　me？

STRAMMFEST。　There　is　an　alternative　to　obedience。　The　dead　cannot
disobey。　＇He　takes　out　his　pistol　and　places　the　muzzle　against
his　temple。＇

SCHNEIDEKIND　＇snatching　the　pistol　from　him＇。　For　God's　sake；
General

STRAMMFEST　＇attacking　him　furiously　to　recover　the　weapon＇。　Dog
of　a　subaltern；　restore　that　pistol　and　my　honor。

SCHNEIDEKIND　＇reaching　out　with　the　pistol　to　the　Grand　Duchess＇。
Take　it：　quick：　he　is　as　strong　as　a　bull。

THE　GRAND　DUCHESS　＇snatching　it＇。　Aha！　Leave　the　room；　all　of　you
except　the　General。　At　the　double！　lightning！　electricity！　＇She
fires　shot　after　shot；　spattering　the　bullets　about　the　ankles　of
the　soldiers。　They　fly　precipitately。　She　turns　to　Schneidekind；
who　has　by　this　time　been　flung　on　the　floor　by　the　General。＇　You
too。　＇He　scrambles　up。＇　March。　＇He　flies　to　the　door。＇

SCHNEIDEKIND　＇turning　at　the　door＇。　For　your　own　sake；　comrade

THE　GRAND　DUCHESS　＇indignantly＇。　Comrade！　You！！！　Go。　＇She　fires
two　more　shots。　He　vanishes。＇

STRAMMFEST　＇making　an　impulsive　movement　towards　her＇。　My
Imperial　Mistress

THE　GRAND　DUCHESS。　Stop。　I　have　one　bullet　left；　if　you　attempt
to　take　this　from　me　＇putting　the　pistol　to　her　temple＇。

STRAMMFEST　＇recoiling；　and　covering　his　eyes　with　his　hands＇。　No
no：　put　it　down：　put　it　down。　I　promise　everything：　I　swear
anything；　but　put　it　down；　I　implore　you。

THE　GRAND　DUCHESS　＇throwing　it　on　the　table＇。　There！

STRAMMFEST　＇uncovering　his　eyes＇。　Thank　God！

THE　GRAND　DUCHESS　＇gently＇。　Strammfest：　I　am　your　comrade。　Am　I
nothing　more　to　you？

STRAMMFEST　＇falling　on　his　knee＇。　You　are；　God　help　me；　all　that
is　left　to　me　of　the　only　power　I　recognize　on　earth　＇he　kisses
her　hand＇。

THE　GRAND　DUCHESS　＇indulgently＇。　Idolater！　When　will　you　learn
that　our　strength　has　never　been　in　ourselves；　but　in　your
illusions　about　us？　＇She　shakes　off　her　kindliness；　and　sits　down
in　his　chair。＇　Now　tell　me；　what　are　your　orders？　And　do　you　mean
to　obey　them？

STRAMMFEST　＇starting　like　a　goaded　ox；　and　blundering　fretfully
about　the　room＇。　How　can　I　obey　six　different　dictators；　and　not
one　gentleman　among　the　lot　of　them？　One　of　them　orders　me　to
make　peace　with　the　foreign　enemy。　Another　orders　me　to　offer　all
the　neutral　countries　48　hours　to　choose　between　adopting　his
views　on　the　single　tax　and　being　instantly　invaded　and
annihilated。　A　third　orders　me　to　go　to　a　damned　Socialist
Conference　and　explain　that　Beotia　will　allow　no　annexations　and
no　indemnities；　and　merely　wishes　to　establish　the　Kingdom　of
Heaven　on　Earth　throughout　the　universe。　＇He　finishes　behind
Schneidekind's　chair。＇

THE　GRAND　DUCHESS。　Damn　their　trifling！

STRAMMFEST。　I　thank　Your　Imperial　Highness　from　the　bottom　of　my
heart　for　that　expression。　Europe　thanks　you。

THE　GRAND　DUCHESS。　M'yes；　but＇rising＇。　Strammfest；　you　know
that　your　causethe　cause　of　the　dynastyis　lost。

STRAMMFEST。　You　must　not　say　so。　It　is　treason；　even　from　you。
＇He　sinks；　discouraged；　into　the　chair；　and　covers　his　face　with
his　hand。＇

THE　GRAND　DUCHESS。　Do　not　deceive　yourself；　General：　never　again
will　a　Panjandrum　reign　in　Beotia。　＇She　walks　slowly　across　the
room；　brooding　bitterly；　and　thinking　aloud。＇　We　are　so　decayed；
so　out　of　date；　so　feeble；　so　wicked　in　our　own　despite；　that　we
have　come　at　last　to　will　our　own　destruction。

STRAMMFEST。　You　are　uttering　blasphemy。

THE　GRAND　DUCHESS。　All　great　truths　begin　as　blasphemies。　All　the
king's　horses　and　all　the　king's　men　cannot　set　up　my　father's
throne　again。　If　they　could；　you　would　have　done　it；　would　you
not？

STRAMMFEST。　God　knows　I　would！

THE　GRAND　DUCHESS。　You　really　mean　that？　You　would　keep　the
people　in　their　hopeless　squalid　misery？　you　would　fill　those
infamous　prisons　again　with　the　noblest　spirits　in　the　land？　you
would　thrust　the　rising　sun　of　liberty　back　into　the　sea　of　blood
from　which　it　has　risen？　And　all　because　there　was　in　the　middle
of　the　dirt　and　ugliness　and　horror　a　little　patch　of　court
splendor　in　which　you　could　stand　with　a　few　orders　on　your
uniform；　and　yawn　day　after　day　and　night　after　night　in
unspeakable　boredom　until　your　grave　yawned　wider　still；　and　you
fell　into　it　because　you　had