mark twain, a biography, 1900-1907-第10章

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But　a　much　more　conspicuous　comment　on　the　Philippine　policy　was　the　so…
called　〃Defense　of　General　Funston〃　for　what　Funston　himself　referred　to
as　a　〃dirty　Irish　trick〃；　that　is　to　say；　deception　in　the　capture　of
Aguinaldo。　　Clemens；　who　found　it　hard　enough　to　reconcile　himself　to…
any　form　of　warfare；　was　especially　bitter　concerning　this　particular
campaign。　　The　article　appeared　in　the　North　American　Review　for　May；
1902；　and　stirred　up　a　good　deal　of　a　storm。　　He　wrote　much　more　on　the
subjectvery　much　morebut　it　is　still　unpublished。




CCXXI

THE　RETURN　OF　THE　NATIVE

One　day　in　April；　1902；　Samuel　Clemens　received　the　following　letter　from
the　president　of　the　University　of　Missouri：

MY　DEAR　MR。　CLEMENS；　Although　you　received　the　degree　of　doctor　of
literature　last　fall　from　Yale；　and　have　had　other　honors　conferred　upon
you　by　other　great　universities；　we　want　to　adopt　you　here　as　a　son　of
the　University　of　Missouri。　　In　asking　your　permission　to　confer　upon　you
the　degree　of　LL。D。　　the　University　of　Missouri　does　not　aim　to　confer　an
honor　upon　you　so　much　as　to　show　her　appreciation　of　you。　　The　rules　of
the　University　forbid　us　to　confer　the　degree　upon　any　one　in　absentia。　
I　hope　very　much　that　you　can　so　arrange　your　plans　as　to　be　with　us　on
the　fourth　day　of　next　June；　when　we　shall　hold　our　Annual　Commencement。

　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　Very　truly　yours；
　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　R。　H。　JESSE。


Clemens　had　not　expected　to　make　another　trip　to　the　West；　but　a
proffered　honor　such　as　this　from　one's　native　State　was　not　a　thing　to
be　declined。

It　was　at　the　end　of　May　when　he　arrived　in　St。　Louis；　and　he　was　met　at
the　train　there　by　his　old　river　instructor　and　friend；　Horace　Bixbyas
fresh；　wiry；　and　capable　as　he　had　been　forty…five　years　before。

〃I　have　become　an　old　man。　　You　are　still　thirty…five；〃　Clemens　said。

They　went　to　the　Planters　Hotel；　and　the　news　presently　got　around　that
Mark　Twain　was　there。　　There　followed　a　sort　of　reception　in　the　hotel
lobby；　after　which　Bixby　took　him　across　to　the　rooms　of　the　Pilots
Association；　where　the　rivermen　gathered　in　force　to　celebrate　his
return。　　A　few　of　his　old　comrades　were　still　alive；　among　them　Beck
Jolly。　　The　same　afternoon　he　took　the　train　for　Hannibal。

It　was　a　busy　five　days　that　he　had　in　Hannibal。　　High…school
commencement　day　came　first。　　He　attended；　and　willingly；　or　at　least
patiently；　sat　through　the　various　recitals　and　orations　and
orchestrations；　dreaming　and　remembering；　no　doubt；　other　high…school
commencements　of　more　than　half　a　century　before；　seeing　in　some　of　those
young　people　the　boys　and　girls　he　had　known　in　that　vanished　time。　　A
few　friends　of　his　youth　were　still　there；　but　they　were　among　the
audience　now；　and　no　longer　fresh　and　looking　into　the　future。　　Their
heads　were　white；　and；　like　him；　they　were　looking　down　the　recorded
years。　　Laura　Hawkins　was　there　and　Helen　Kercheval　（Mrs。　Frazer　and　Mrs。
Garth　now）；　and　there　were　others；　but　they　were　few　and　scattering。

He　was　added　to　the　program；　and　he　made　himself　as　one　of　the　graduates；
and　told　them　some　things　of　the　young　people　of　that　earlier　time　that
brought　their　laughter　and　their　tears。

He　was　asked　to　distribute　the　diplomas；　and　he　undertook　the　work　in　his
own　way。　　He　took　an　armful　of　them　and　said　to　the　graduates：

〃Take　one。　　Pick　out　a　good　one。　　Don't　take　two；　but　be　sure　you　get　a
good　one。〃

So　each　took　one　〃unsight　and　unseen〃　aid　made　the　more　exact
distributions　among　themselves　later。

Next　morning　it　was　Saturdayhe　visited　the　old　home　on　Hill　Street；　and
stood　in　the　doorway　all　dressed　in　white　while　a　battalion　of
photographers　made　pictures　of　〃this　return　of　the　native〃　to　the
threshold　of　his　youth。　　　　　　

〃It　all　seems　so　small　to　me；〃　he　said；　as　he　looked　through　the　house；
〃a　boy's　home　is　a　big　place　to　him。　　I　suppose　if　I　should　come　back
again　ten　years　from　now　it　would　be　the　size　of　a　birdhouse。〃

He　went　through　the　rooms　and　up…stairs　where　he　had　slept　and　looked　out
the　window　down　in　the　back　yard　where；　nearly　sixty　years　before；　Tom
Sawyer；　Huck　Finn；　Joe　Harper；　and　the　restthat　is　to　say；　Tom
Blankenship；　John　Briggs；　Will　Pitts；　and　the　Bowen　boysset　out　on
their　nightly　escapades。　　Of　that　lightsome　band　Will　Pitts　and　John
Briggs　still　remained；　with　half　a　dozen　othersschoolmates　of　the　less
adventurous　sort。　　Buck　Brown；　who　had　been　his　rival　in　the　spelling
contests；　was　still　there；　and　John　Robards；　who　had　worn　golden　curls
and　the　medal　for　good　conduct；　and　Ed　Pierce。　　And　while　these　were
assembled　in　a　little　group　on　the　pavement　outside　the　home　a　small　old
man　came　up　and　put　out　his　hand；　and　it　was　Jimmy　MacDaniel；　to　whom　so
long　before；　sitting　on　the　river…bank　and　eating　gingerbread；　he　had
first　told　the　story　of　Jim　Wolfe　and　the　cats。

They　put　him　into　a　carriage；　drove　him　far　and　wide；　and　showed　the
hills　and　resorts　and　rendezvous　of　Tom　Sawyer　and　his　marauding　band。

He　was　entertained　that　evening　by　the　Labinnah　Club　（whose　name　was
achieved　by　a　backward　spelling　of　Hannibal）；　where　he　found　most　of　the
survivors　of　his　youth。　　The　news　report　of　that　occasion　states　that　he
was　introduced　by　Father　McLoughlin；　and　that　he　〃responded　in　a　very
humorous　and　touchingly　pathetic　way；　breaking　down　in　tears　at　the
conclusion。　　Commenting　on　his　boyhood　days　and　referring　to　his　mother
was　too　much　for　the　great　humorist。　　Before　him　as　he　spoke　were　sitting
seven　of　his　boyhood　friends。〃

On　Sunday　morning　Col。　John　Robards　escorted　him　to　the　various　churches
and　Sunday…schools。　　They　were　all　new　churches　to　Samuel　Clemens；　but　he
pretended　not　to　recognize　this　fact。　　In　each　one　he　was　asked　to　speak
a　few　words；　and　he　began　by　saying　how　good　it　was　to　be　back　in　the　old
home　Sunday…school　again；　which　as　a　boy　he　had　always　so　loved；　and　he
would　go　on　and　point　out　the　very　place　he　had　sat；　and　his　escort
hardly　knew　whether　or　not　to　enjoy　the　proceedings。　　At　one　place　he
told　a　moral　story。　　He　said：

Little　boys　and　girls；　I　want　to　tell　you　a　story　which　illustrates　the
value　of　perseveranceof　sticking　to　your　work；　as　it　were。　　It　is　a
story　very　proper　for　a　Sunday…school。　　When　I　was　a　little　boy　in
Hannibal　I　used　to　play　a　good　deal　up　here　on　Holliday's　Hill；　which　of
course　you　all　know。　　John　Briggs　and　I　played　up　there。　　I　don't　suppose
there　are　any　little　boys　as　good　as　we　were　then；　but　of　course　that　is
not　to　be　expected。　　Little　boys　in　those　days　were　'most　always　good
little　boys；　because　those　were　the　good　old　times　when　everything　was
better　than　it　is　now；　but　never　mind　that。　　Well；　once　upon　a　time；　on
Holliday's　Hill；　they　were　blasting　out　rock；　and　a　man　was　drilling　for
a　blast。　　He　sat　there　and　drilled　and　drilled　and　drilled　perseveringly
until　he　had　a　hole　down　deep　enough　for　the　blast。　　Then　he　put　in　the
powder　and　tamped　and　tamped　it　down；　but　maybe　he　tamped　it　a　little　too
hard；　for　the　blast　went　off　and　he　went　up　into　the　air；　and　we　watched
him。　　He　went　up　higher　and　higher　and　got　smaller　and　smaller。　　First　he
looked　as　big　as　a　child；　then　as　big　as　a　dog；　then　as　big　as　a　kitten；
then　as　big　as　a　bird；　and　finally　he　went　out　of　sight。　John　Briggs　was
with　me；　and　we　watched　the　place　where　he　went　out　of　sight；　and　by　and
by　we　saw　him　coming　down　first　as　big　as　a　bird；　then　as　big　as　a
kitten；　then　as　big　as　a　dog；　then　as　big　as　a　child；　and　then　he　was　a
man　again；　and　landed　right　in　his　seat　and　went　to　drilling　just
persevering；　you　see；　and　sticking　to　his　work。　　Little　boys　and　girls；
that's　the　secret　of　success；　just　like　that　poor　but　honest　workman　on
Holliday's　Hill。　　Of　course　you　won't　always　be　appreciated。　　He　wasn't。　
His　employer　was　a　hard　man；　and　on　Saturday　night　when　he　paid　him　he
docked　him　fifteen　minutes　for　the　time　he　was　up　in　the　airbut　never
mind；　he　had　his　reward。

He　told　all　this　in　his　solemn；　grave　way；　though　the　Sunday…school　was
in　a　storm　of　enjoyment　when　he　finished。　　There　still　remains　a　doubt　in
Hannibal　as　to　its　perfect　suitability；　but　there　is　no　doubt　as　to　its
acceptability。

That　Sunday　afternoon；　with　John　Briggs；　he　walked　over　Holliday's　Hill
the　Cardiff　Hill　of　Tom　Sawyer。　　It　was　jest　such　a　Sunday　as　that　one
when　they　had　so　nearly　demolished　the　negro　driver　and　had　damaged　a
cooper…shop。　　They　calculated　that　nearly　three　thousand　Sundays　had
passed　since　then；　and　now　here　they　were　once　more；　two　old　men　with　the
hills　still　fresh　and　green；　the　river　still　sweeping　by　and　rippling　in
the　sun。　　Standing　there　together　and　looking　across　to　the　low…lying
Illinois　shore；　and　to　the　green　islands　where　they　had　played；　and　to
Lover's　Leap　on　the　south；　the　man　who　had　been　Sam　Clemens　said：

〃John；　that　is　one　of　the　loveliest　sights　I　ever　saw。　　Down　there　by　the
island　is　the　place　we　used　to　swim；　and　yonder　is　where　a　man　was
drowned；　and　there's　where　the　steamboat　sank。　　Down　there　on　Lover's
Leap　is　where　the　Millerites　put　on　their　robes　one　night　to　go　to
heaven。　　None　of　them　went　that　night；　but　I　suppose　most　of　them　have
gone　now。〃

John　Briggs　said：

〃Sam；　do　you　remember　the　day　we　stole　the　peaches　from　old　man　Price　and
one　of　his　bow…legged　niggers　came　after　us　with　the　dogs；　and　how　we
made　up　our　minds　that　we'd　catch　that　nigger　and　drown　him？〃

They　came　to　the　place　where　they　had　pried　out　the　great　rock　that　had
so　nearly　brought　them　to　grief。　　Sam　Clemens　said：

〃John；　if　we　had　killed　that　man　we'd　have　had　a　dead　nigger　on　our　hands
without　a　cent　to　pay　for　him。〃

And　so　they　talked　on　of　this　thing　and　that；　and　by　and　by　they　drove
along　the　river；　and　Sam　Clemens　pointed　out　the　place　where　he　swam　it
and　was　taken　with　a　cramp　on　the　return　swim；　and　believed　for　a　while
that　his　career　was　about　to　close。

〃Once；　near　the　shore；　I　thought　I　would　let　down；〃　he　said；　〃but　was
afraid　to；　knowing　that　if　the　water　was　deep　I　was　a　goner；　but　finally
my　knees　struck　the　sand　and　I　crawled　out。　　That　was　the　closest　call　I
ever　had。〃

They　drove　by　the　place　where　the　haunted　house　had　stood。　　They　drank
from　a　well　they　had　always　known；　and　from　the　bucket　as　they　had　always
drunk；　talking　and　always　talking；　fondling　lovingly　and　lingeringly　that
most　beautiful　of　all　our　possessions；　the　past。

〃Sam；〃　said　John；　when　they　parted；　〃this　is　probably　the　last　time　we
shall　meet　on　this　earth。　　God　bless　you。　　Perhaps　somewhere　we　shall
renew　our　friendship。〃

〃John；〃　was　the　answer；　〃this　day　has　been　worth　thousands　of　dollars　to
me。　　We　were　like　brothers　once；　and　I　feel　that　we　are　the　same　now。　
Good…by；　John。　　I'll　try　to　meet　yousomewhere。〃




CCXXII

A　PROPHET　HONORED　IN　HIS　COUNTRY

Clemens　left　next　day　for　Columbia。　　Committees　met　him　at　Rensselaer；
Monroe　City；　Clapper；　Stoutsville；　Paris；　Madison；　Moberlyat　every
station　along　the　line　of　his　travel。　　At　each　place　crowds　were　gathered
when　the　train　pulled　in；　to　cheer　and　wave　and　to　present　him　with
flowers。　　Sometimes　he　spoke　a　few