mark twain, a biography, 1900-1907-第31章

按键盘上方向键 ← 或 → 可快速上下翻页，按键盘上的 Enter 键可回到本书目录页，按键盘上方向键 ↑ 可回到本页顶部！
————未阅读完？加入书签已便下次继续阅读！


in　the　midst　of　his　march；　and　without　a　suggestion　of　a　smile　added：

〃What　an　amusing　creature　the　human　being　is！〃

It　is　absolutely　impossible；　of　course；　to　preserve　the　atmosphere　and
personality　of　such　talks　as　thisthe　delicacies　of　his　speech　and
manner　which　carried　an　ineffable　charm。　　It　was　difficult；　indeed；　to
record　the　substance。　　I　did　not　know　shorthand；　and　I　should　not　have
taken　notes　at　such　times　in　any　case；　but　I　had　trained　myself　in
similar　work　to　preserve；　with　a　fair　degree　of　accuracy；　the　form　of
phrase；　and　to　some　extent　its　wording；　if　I　could　get　hold　of　pencil　and
paper　soon　enough　afterward。　　In　time　I　acquired　a　sort　of　phonographic
faculty；　though　it　always　seemed　to　me　that　the　bouquet；　the　subtleness
of　speech；　was　lacking　in　the　result。　　Sometimes；　indeed；　he　would
dictate　next　morning　the　substance　of　these　experimental　reflections；　or
I　would　find　among　his　papers　memoranda　and　fragmentary　manuscripts　where
he　had　set　them　down　himself；　either　before　or　after　he　had　tried　them
verbally。　　In　these　cases　I　have　not　hesitated　to　amend　my　notes　where　it
seemed　to　lend　reality　to　his　utterance；　though；　even　so；　there　is　always
lackingand　must　bethe　wonder　of　his　personality。




CCXLV

IN　THE　DAY'S　ROUND

A　number　of　dictations　of　this　period　were　about　Susy；　her　childhood；　and
the　biography　she　had　written　of　him；　most　of　which　he　included　in　his
chapters。　　More　than　once　after　such　dictations　he　reproached　himself
bitterly　for　the　misfortunes　of　his　house。　　He　consoled　himself　a　little
by　saying　that　Susy　had　died　at　the　right　time；　in　the　flower　of　youth
and　happiness；　but　he　blamed　himself　for　the　lack　of　those　things　which
might　have　made　her　childhood　still　more　bright。　　Once　he　spoke　of　the
biography　she　had　begun；　and　added：

〃Oh；　I　wish　I　had　paid　more　attention　to　that　little　girl's　work！　　If　I
had　only　encouraged　her　now　and　then；　what　it　would　have　meant　to　her；
and　what　a　beautiful　thing　it　would　have　been　to　have　had　her　story　of　me
told　in　her　own　way；　year　after　year！　　If　I　had　shown　her　that　I　cared；
she　might　have　gone　on　with　it。　　We　are　always　too　busy　for　our　children；
we　never　give　them　the　time　nor　the　interest　they　deserve。　　We　lavish
gifts　upon　them；　but　the　most　precious　gift…our　personal　association；
which　means　so　much　to　them…we　give　grudgingly　and　throw　it　away　on　those
who　care　for　it　so　little。〃　　Then；　after　a　moment　of　silence：　〃But　we　are
repaid　for　it　at　last。　　There　comes　a　time　when　we　want　their　company　and
their　interest。　　We　want　it　more　than　anything　in　the　world；　and　we　are
likely　to　be　starved　for　it；　just　as　they　were　starved　so　long　ago。　
There　is　no　appreciation　of　my　books　that　is　so　precious　to　me　as
appreciation　from　my　children。　　Theirs　is　the　praise　we　want；　and　the
praise　we　are　least　likely　to　get。〃

His　moods　of　remorse　seemed　to　overwhelm　him　at　times。　　He　spoke　of
Henry's　death　and　little　Langdon's；　and　charged　himself　with　both。
He　declared　that　for　years　he　had　filled　Mrs。　Clemens's　life　with
privations；　that　the　sorrow　of　Susy's　death　had　hastened　her　own　end。　
How　darkly　he　painted　it！　　One　saw　the　jester；　who　for　forty　years　had
been　making　the　world　laugh；　performing　always　before　a　background　of
tragedy。

But　such　moods　were　evanescent。　　He　was　oftener　gay　than　somber。　　One
morning　before　we　settled　down　to　work　he　related　with　apparent　joy　how
he　had　made　a　failure　of　story…telling　at　a　party　the　night　before。　　An
artist　had　told　him　a　yarn；　he　said；　which　he　had　considered　the　most
amusing　thing　in　the　world。　　But　he　had　not　been　satisfied　with　it；　and
had　attempted　to　improve　on　it　at　the　party。　　He　had　told　it　with　what　he
considered　the　nicest　elaboration　of　detail　and　artistic　effect；　and　when
he　had　concluded　and　expected　applause；　only　a　sickening　silence　had
followed。

〃A　crowd　like　that　can　make　a　good　deal　of　silence　when　they　combine；〃　he
said；　〃and　it　probably　lasted　as　long　as　ten　seconds；　because　it　seemed
an　hour　and　a　half。　　Then　a　lady　said；　with　evident　feeling；　'Lord；　how
pathetic！'　For　a　moment　I　was　stupefied。　　Then　the　fountains　of　my　great
deeps　were　broken　up；　and　I　rained　laughter　for　forty　days　and　forty
nights　during　as　much　as　three　minutes。　　By　that　time　I　realized　it　was
my　fault。　　I　had　overdone　the　thing。　　I　started　in　to　deceive　them　with
elaborate　burlesque　pathos；　in　order　to　magnify　the　humorous　explosion　at
the　end；　but　I　had　constructed　such　a　fog　of　pathos　that　when　I　got　to
the　humor　you　couldn't　find　it。〃

He　was　likely　to　begin　the　morning　with　some　such　incident　which　perhaps
he　did　not　think　worth　while　to　include　in　his　dictations；　and　sometimes
he　interrupted　his　dictations　to　relate　something　aside；　or　to　outline
some　plan　or　scheme　which　his　thought　had　suggested。

Once；　when　he　was　telling　of　a　magazine　he　had　proposed　to　start；　the
Back　Number；　which　was；　to　contain　reprints　of　exciting　events　from
historynewspaper　gleaningseye…witness　narrations；　which　he　said　never
lost　their　freshness　of　interesthe　suddenly　interrupted　himself　to
propose　that　we　start　such　a　magazine　in　the　near　futurehe　to　be　its
publisher　and　I　its　editor。　　I　think　I　assented；　and　the　dictation
proceeded；　but　the　scheme　disappeared　permanently。

He　usually　had　a　number　of　clippings　or　slips　among　the　many　books　on　the
bed　beside　him　from　which　he　proposed　to　dictate　each　day；　but　he　seldom
could　find　the　one　most　needed。　　Once；　after　a　feverishly　impatient
search　for　a　few　moments；　he　invited　Miss　Hobby　to　leave　the　room
temporarily；　so；　as　he　said；　that　he　might　swear。　　He　got　up　and　we　began
to　explore　the　bed；　his　profanity　increasing　amazingly　with　each　moment。　
It　was　an　enormously　large　bed；　and　he　began　to　disparage　the　size　of　it。

〃One　could　lose　a　dog　in　this　bed；〃　he　declared。

Finally　I　suggested　that　he　turn　over　the　clipping　which　he　had　in　his
hand。　　He　did　so；　and　it　proved　to　be　the　one　he　wanted。　　Its　discovery
was　followed　by　a　period　of　explosions；　only　half　suppressed　as　to
volume。　　Then　he　said：

〃There　ought　to　be　a　room　in　this　house　to　swear　in。　　It's　dangerous　to
have　to　repress　an　emotion　like　that。〃

A　moment　later；　when　Miss　Hobby　returned；　he　was　serene　and　happy　again。　
He　was　usually　gentle　during　the　dictations；　and　patient　with　those
around　himremarkably　so；　I　thought；　as　a　rule。　　But　there　were　moments
that　involved　risk。　　He　had　requested　me　to　interrupt　his　dictation　at
any　time　that　I　found　him　repeating　or　contradicting　himself；　or
misstating　some　fact　known　to　me。　　At　first　I　hesitated　to　do　this；　and
cautiously　mentioned　the　matter　when　he　had　finished。　　Then　he　was　likely
to　say：

〃Why　didn't　you　stop　me？　　Why　did　you　let　me　go　on　making　a　jackass　of
myself　when　you　could　have　saved　me？〃

So　then　I　used　to　take　the　risk　of　getting　struck　by　lightning；　and
nearly　always　stopped　him　at　the　time。　　But　if　it　happened　that　I　upset
his　thought　the　thunderbolt　was　apt　to　fly。　　He　would　say：

〃Now　you've　knocked　everything　out　of　my　head。〃

Then；　of　course；　I　would　apologize　and　say　I　was　sorry；　which　would
rectify　matters；　though　half　an　hour　later　it　might　happen　again。　　I
became　lightning…proof　at　last；　also　I　learned　better　to　select　the
psychological　moment　for　the　correction。

There　was　a　humorous　complexion　to　the　dictations　which　perhaps　I　have
not　conveyed　to　the　reader　at　all；　humor　was　his　natural　breath　and　life；
and　was　not　wholly　absent　in　his　most　somber　intervals。

But　poetry　was　there　as　well。　　His　presence　was　full　of　it：　the　grandeur
of　his　figure；　the　grace　of　his　movement；　the　music　of　his　measured
speech。　　Sometimes　there　were　long　pauses　when　he　was　wandering　in
distant　valleys　of　thought　and　did　not　speak　at　all。　　At　such　times　he
had　a　habit　of　folding　and　refolding　the　sleeve　of　his　dressing…gown
around　his　wrist；　regarding　it　intently；　as　it　seemed。　　His　hands　were　so
fair　and　shapely；　the　palms　and　finger…tips　as　pink　as　those　of　a　child。　
Then　when　he　spoke　he　was　likely　to　fling　back　his　great；　white　mane；　his
eyes　half　closed　yet　showing　a　gleam　of　fire　between　the　lids；　his
clenched　fist　lifted；　or　his　index…finger　pointing；　to　give　force　and
meaning　to　his　words。　　I　cannot　recall　the　picture　too　often；　or　remind
myself　too　frequently　how　precious　it　was　to　be　there；　and　to　see　him　and
to　hear　him。　　I　do　not　know　why　I　have　not　said　before　that　he　smoked
continually　during　these　dictationsprobably　as　an　aid　to　thought
though　he　smoked　at　most　other　times；　for　that　matter。　　His　cigars　were
of　that　delicious　fragrance　which　characterizes　domestic　tobacco；　but　I
had　learned　early　to　take　refuge　in　another　brand　when　he　offered　me　one。　
They　were　black　and　strong　and　inexpensive；　and　it　was　only　his　early
training　in　the　printing…office　and　on　the　river　that　had　seasoned　him　to
tobacco　of　that　temper。　　Rich；　admiring　friends　used　to　send　him
quantities　of　expensive　imported　cigars；　but　he　seldom　touched　them；　and
they　crumbled　away　or　were　smoked　by　visitors。　　Once；　to　a　minister　who
proposed　to　send　him　something　very　special；　he　wrote：

　　　　　I　should　accept　your　hospitable　offer　at　once　but　for　the　fact　that
　　　　　I　couldn't　do　it　and　remain　honest。　　That　is　to　say；　if　I　allowed
　　　　　you　to　send　me　what　you　believed　to　be　good　cigars　it　would
　　　　　distinctly　mean　that　I　meant　to　smoke　them；　whereas　I　should　do
　　　　　nothing　of　the　kind。　　I　know　a　good　cigar　better　than　you　do；　for　I
　　　　　have　had　60　years'　experience。

　　　　　No；　that　is　not　what　I　mean；　I　mean　I　know　a　bad　cigar　better　than
　　　　　anybody　else。　　I　judge　by　the　price　only；　if　it　costs　above　5　cents
　　　　　I　know　it　to　be　either　foreign　or　half　foreign　&　unsmokableby　me。　
　　　　　I　have　many　boxes　of　Havana　cigars；　of　all　prices　from　20　cents
　　　　　apiece　up　to　1。66　apiece；　I　bought　none　of　them；　they　were　all
　　　　　presents；　they　are　an　accumulation　of　several　years。　　I　have　never
　　　　　smoked　one　of　them　&　never　shall；　I　work　them　off　on　the　visitor。　
　　　　　You　shall　have　a　chance　when　you　come。

He　smoked　a　pipe　a　good　deal；　and　he　preferred　it　to　be　old　and　violent；
and　once；　when　he　had　bought　a　new；　expensive　English　brier…root　he
regarded　it　doubtfully　for　a　time；　and　then　handed　it　over　to　me；　saying：

〃I'd　like　to　have　you　smoke　that　a　year　or　two；　and　when　it　gets　so　you
can't　stand　it；　maybe　it　will　suit　me。〃

I　am　happy　to　add　that　subsequently　he　presented　me　with　the　pipe
altogether；　for　it　apparently　never　seemed　to　get　qualified　for　his
taste；　perhaps　because　the　tobacco　used　was　too　mild。

One　day；　after　the　dictation；　word　was　brought　up　that　a　newspaper　man
was　down…stairs　who　wished　to　see　him　concerning　a　report　that　Chauncey
Depew　was　to　resign　his　Senatorial　seat　and　Mark　Twain　was　to　be
nominated　in　his　place。　　The　fancy　of　this　appealed　to　him；　and　the
reporter　was　allowed　to　come　up。　　He　was　a　young　man；　and　seemed　rather
nervous；　and　did　not　wish　to　state　where　the　report　had　originated。　　His
chief　anxiety　was　apparently　to　have　Mark　Twain's　comment　on　the　matter。　
Clemens　said　very　little　at　the　time。　　He　did　not　wish　to　be　a　Senator；
he　was　too　busy　just　now　dictating　biography；　and　a