winesburg,ohio-第34章

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In　the　darkness　under　the　roof　of　the　grand…stand；　George　Willard　sat　beside　Helen　White　and　felt　very　keenly　his　own　insignificance　in　the　scheme　of　exis…　tence。　　Now　that　he　had　come　out　of　town　where　the　presence　of　the　people　stirring　about；　busy　with　a　multitude　of　affairs；　had　been　so　irritating；　the　irritation　was　all　gone。　　The　presence　of　Helen　re…　newed　and　refreshed　him。　　It　was　as　though　her　woman's　hand　was　assisting　him　to　make　some　mi…　nute　readjustment　of　the　machinery　of　his　life。　　He　began　to　think　of　the　people　in　the　town　where　he　had　always　lived　with　something　like　reverence。　He　had　reverence　for　Helen。　　He　wanted　to　love　and　to　be　loved　by　her；　but　he　did　not　want　at　the　mo…　ment　to　be　confused　by　her　womanhood。　　In　the　darkness　he　took　hold　of　her　hand　and　when　she　crept　close　put　a　hand　on　her　shoulder。　　A　wind　began　to　blow　and　he　shivered。　　With　all　his　strength　he　tried　to　hold　and　to　understand　the　mood　that　had　come　upon　him。　　In　that　high　place　in　the　dark…　ness　the　two　oddly　sensitive　human　atoms　held　each　other　tightly　and　waited。　　In　the　mind　of　each　was　the　same　thought。　　〃I　have　come　to　this　lonely　place　and　here　is　this　other；〃　was　the　substance　of　the　thing　felt。

In　Winesburg　the　crowded　day　had　run　itself　out　into　the　long　night　of　the　late　fall。　　Farm　horses　jogged　away　along　lonely　country　roads　pulling　their　portion　of　weary　people。　　Clerks　began　to　bring　sam…　ples　of　goods　in　off　the　sidewalks　and　lock　the　doors　of　stores。　　In　the　Opera　House　a　crowd　had　gathered　to　see　a　show　and　further　down　Main　Street　the　fiddlers；　their　instruments　tuned；　sweated　and　worked　to　keep　the　feet　of　youth　flying　over　a　dance　floor。

In　the　darkness　in　the　grand…stand　Helen　White　and　George　Willard　remained　silent。　　Now　and　then　the　spell　that　held　them　was　broken　and　they　turned　and　tried　in　the　dim　light　to　see　into　each　other's　eyes。　　They　kissed　but　that　impulse　did　not　last。　　At　the　upper　end　of　the　Fair　Ground　a　half　dozen　men　worked　over　horses　that　had　raced　during　the　after…　noon。　　The　men　had　built　a　fire　and　were　heating　kettles　of　water。　　Only　their　legs　could　be　seen　as　they　passed　back　and　forth　in　the　light。　　When　the　wind　blew　the　little　flames　of　the　fire　danced　crazily　about。

George　and　Helen　arose　and　walked　away　into　the　darkness。　　They　went　along　a　path　past　a　field　of　corn　that　had　not　yet　been　cut。　　The　wind　whispered　among　the　dry　corn　blades。　　For　a　moment　during　the　walk　back　into　town　the　spell　that　held　them　was　broken。　　When　they　had　come　to　the　crest　of　Waterworks　Hill　they　stopped　by　a　tree　and　George　again　put　his　hands　on　the　girl's　shoulders。　　She　em…　braced　him　eagerly　and　then　again　they　drew　quickly　back　from　that　impulse。　　They　stopped　kiss…　ing　and　stood　a　little　apart。　　Mutual　respect　grew　big　in　them。　　They　were　both　embarrassed　and　to　relieve　their　embarrassment　dropped　into　the　animalism　of　youth。　　They　laughed　and　began　to　pull　and　haul　at　each　other。　　In　some　way　chastened　and　purified　by　the　mood　they　had　been　in；　they　became；　not　man　and　woman；　not　boy　and　girl；　but　excited　little　animals。

It　was　so　they　went　down　the　hill。　　In　the　darkness　they　played　like　two　splendid　young　things　in　a　young　world。　　Once；　running　swiftly　forward；　Helen　tripped　George　and　he　fell。　　He　squirmed　and　shouted。　Shaking　with　laughter；　he　roiled　down　the　hill。　Helen　ran　after　him。　　For　just　a　moment　she　stopped　in　the　darkness。　　There　was　no　way　of　knowing　what　woman's　thoughts　went　through　her　mind　but；　when　the　bottom　of　the　hill　was　reached　and　she　came　up　to　the　boy；　she　took　his　arm　and　walked　beside　him　in　dignified　silence。　　For　some　reason　they　could　not　have　explained　they　had　both　got　from　their　silent　evening　together　the　thing　needed。　Man　or　boy；　woman　or　girl；　they　had　for　a　moment　taken　hold　of　the　thing　that　makes　the　mature　life　of　men　and　women　in　the　modern　world　possible。



DEPARTURE

YOUNG　GEORGE　WILLARD　got　out　of　bed　at　four　in　the　morning。　　It　was　April　and　the　young　tree　leaves　were　just　coming　out　of　their　buds。　　The　trees　along　the　residence　streets　in　Winesburg　are　maple　and　the　seeds　are　winged。　　When　the　wind　blows　they　whirl　crazily　about；　filling　the　air　and　making　a　car…　pet　underfoot。

George　came　downstairs　into　the　hotel　office　car…　rying　a　brown　leather　bag。　　His　trunk　was　packed　for　departure。　　Since　two　o'clock　he　had　been　awake　thinking　of　the　journey　he　was　about　to　take　and　wondering　what　he　would　find　at　the　end　of　his　journey。　　The　boy　who　slept　in　the　hotel　office　lay　on　a　cot　by　the　door。　　His　mouth　was　open　and　he　snored　lustily。　　George　crept　past　the　cot　and　went　out　into　the　silent　deserted　main　street。　　The　east　was　pink　with　the　dawn　and　long　streaks　of　light　climbed　into　the　sky　where　a　few　stars　still　shone。

Beyond　the　last　house　on　Trunion　Pike　in　Wines…　burg　there　is　a　great　stretch　of　open　fields。　　The　fields　are　owned　by　farmers　who　live　in　town　and　drive　homeward　at　evening　along　Trunion　Pike　in　light　creaking　wagons。　　In　the　fields　are　planted　berries　and　small　fruits。　　In　the　late　afternoon　in　the　hot　summers　when　the　road　and　the　fields　are　covered　with　dust；　a　smoky　haze　lies　over　the　great　flat　basin　of　land。　　To　look　across　it　is　like　looking　out　across　the　sea。　　In　the　spring　when　the　land　is　green　the　effect　is　somewhat　different。　　The　land　becomes　a　wide　green　billiard　table　on　which　tiny　human　in…　sects　toil　up　and　down。

All　through　his　boyhood　and　young　manhood　George　Willard　had　been　in　the　habit　of　walking　on　Trunion　Pike。　　He　had　been　in　the　midst　of　the　great　open　place　on　winter　nights　when　it　was　covered　with　snow　and　only　the　moon　looked　down　at　him；　he　had　been　there　in　the　fall　when　bleak　winds　blew　and　on　summer　evenings　when　the　air　vibrated　with　the　song　of　insects。　　On　the　April　morning　he　wanted　to　go　there　again；　to　walk　again　in　the　silence。　　He　did　walk　to　where　the　road　dipped　down　by　a　little　stream　two　miles　from　town　and　then　turned　and　walked　silently　back　again。　　When　he　got　to　Main　Street　clerks　were　sweeping　the　sidewalks　before　the　stores。　　〃Hey；　you　George。　　How　does　it　feel　to　be　going　away？〃　they　asked。

The　westbound　train　leaves　Winesburg　at　seven　forty…five　in　the　morning。　　Tom　Little　is　conductor。　His　train　runs　from　Cleveland　to　where　it　connects　with　a　great　trunk　line　railroad　with　terminals　in　Chicago　and　New　York。　　Tom　has　what　in　railroad　circles　is　called　an　〃easy　run。〃　Every　evening　he　returns　to　his　family。　　In　the　fall　and　spring　he　spends　his　Sundays　fishing　in　Lake　Erie。　　He　has　a　round　red　face　and　small　blue　eyes。　　He　knows　the　people　in　the　towns　along　his　railroad　better　than　a　city　man　knows　the　people　who　live　in　his　apart…　ment　building。

George　came　down　the　little　incline　from　the　New　Willard　House　at　seven　o'clock。　　Tom　Willard　carried　his　bag。　　The　son　had　become　taller　than　the　father。

On　the　station　platform　everyone　shook　the　young　man's　hand。　　More　than　a　dozen　people　waited　about。　　Then　they　talked　of　their　own　affairs。　　Even　Will　Henderson；　who　was　lazy　and　often　slept　until　nine；　had　got　out　of　bed。　　George　was　embarrassed。　Gertrude　Wilmot；　a　tall　thin　woman　of　fifty　who　worked　in　the　Winesburg　post　office；　came　along　the　station　platform。　　She　had　never　before　paid　any　attention　to　George。　　Now　she　stopped　and　put　out　her　hand。　　In　two　words　she　voiced　what　everyone　felt。　　〃Good　luck；〃　she　said　sharply　and　then　turning　went　on　her　way。

When　the　train　came　into　the　station　George　felt　relieved。　　He　scampered　hurriedly　aboard。　　Helen　White　came　running　along　Main　Street　hoping　to　have　a　parting　word　with　him；　but　he　had　found　a　seat　and　did　not　see　her。　　When　the　train　started　Tom　Little　punched　his　ticket；　grinned　and；　although　he　knew　George　well　and　knew　on　what　adventure　he　was　just　setting　out；　made　no　comment。　　Tom　had　seen　a　thousand　George　Willards　go　out　of　their　towns　to　the　city。　　It　was　a　commonplace　enough　incident　with　him。　　In　the　smoking　car　there　was　a　man　who　had　just　invited　Tom　to　go　on　a　fishing　trip　to　Sandusky　Bay。　　He　wanted　to　accept　the　invi…　tation　and　talk　over　details。

George　glanced　up　and　down　the　car　to　be　sure　no　one　was　looking；　then　took　out　his　pocketbook　and　counted　his　money。　　His　mind　was　occupied　with　a　desire　not　to　appear　green。　　Almost　the　last　words　his　father　had　said　to　him　concerned　the　mat…　ter　of　his　behavior　when　he　got　to　the　city。　　〃Be　a　sharp　one；〃　Tom　Willard　had　said。　　〃Keep　your　eyes　on　your　money。　　Be　awake。　　That's　the　ticket。　　Don't　let　anyone　think　you're　a　greenhorn。〃

After　George　counted　his　money　he　looked　out　of　the　window　and　was　surprised　to　see　that　the　train　was　still　in　Winesburg。

The　young　man；　going　out　of　his　town　to　meet　the　adventure　of　life；　began　to　think　but　he　did　not　think　of　anything　very　big　or　dramatic。　　Things　like　his　mother's　death；　his　departure　from　Winesburg；　the　uncertainty　of　his　future　life　in　the　city；　the　seri…　ous　and　larger　aspects　of　his　life　did　not　come　into　his　mind。

He　thought　of　little　thingsTurk　Smollet　wheel…　ing　boards　through　the　main　street　of　his　town　in　the　morning；　a　tall　woman；　beautifully　gowned；　who　had　once　stayed　overnight　at　his　father's　hotel；　Butch　Wheeler　the　lamp　lighter　of　Winesburg　hur…　rying　through　the　streets　on　a　summer　evening　and　holding　a　torch　in　his　hand；　Helen　White　standing　by　a　window　in　the　Winesburg　post　office　and　put…　ting　a　stamp　on　an　envelope。

The　young　man's　mind　was　carried　away　by　his　growing　passion　for　dreams。　　One　looking　at　him　would　not　have　thought　him　particularly　sharp。　With　the　recollection　of　little　things　occupying　his　mind　he　closed　his　eyes　and　leaned　back　in　the　car　seat。　　He　stayed　that　way　for　a　long　time　and　when　he　aroused　himself　and　again　looked　out　of　the　car　window　the　town　of　Winesburg　had　disappeared　and　his　life　there　had　become　but　a　background　on　which　to　paint　the　dreams　of　his　manhood。



End