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with explainin'; when everythin' is acted out right in the road?〃



There was quite a gathering of neighbors at the Bascoms'

on this particular July afternoon。  No invitations had been sent out;

and none were needed。  A common excitement had made it vital

that people should drop in somewhere; and speculate about certain

interesting matters well known to be going on in the community;

but going on in such an underhand and secretive fashion that it

well…nigh destroyed one's faith in human nature。



The sitting…room door was open into the entry; so that

whatever breeze there was might come in; and an unusual

glimpse of the new foreroom rug was afforded the spectators。

Everything was as neat as wax; for Diadema was a housekeeper

of the type fast passing away。  The great coal stove was enveloped

in its usual summer wrapper of purple calico; which; tied neatly

about its ebony neck and portly waist; gave it the appearance

of a buxom colored lady presiding over the assembly。

The kerosene lamps stood in a row on the high; narrow mantelpiece;

each chimney protected from the flies by a brown paper bag

inverted over its head。  Two plaster Samuels praying under

the pink mosquito netting adorned the ends of the shelf。

There were screens at all the windows; and Diadema fidgeted

nervously when a visitor came in the mosquito netting door;

for fear a fly should sneak in with her。



On the wall were certificates of membership in the Missionary Society;

a picture of Maidens welcoming Washington in the Streets of Alexandria;

in a frame of cucumber seeds; and an interesting document setting forth

the claims of the Dunnell family as old settlers long before the separation

of Maine from Massachusetts;the fact bein' established by an obituary

notice reading; 〃In Saco; December 1791; Dorcas; daughter of Abiathar Dunnell;

two months old of Fits unbaptized。〃



〃He may be goin' to marry Eunice; and he may not;〃 observed Almira Berry;

〃though what she wants of Reuben Hobson is more 'n I can make out。

I never see a widower straighten up as he has this last year。

I guess he's been lookin' round pretty lively; but couldn't find anybody

that was fool enough to give him any encouragement。〃



〃Mebbe she wants to get married;〃 said Hannah Sophia;

in a tone that spoke volumes。  〃When Parson Perkins come

to this parish; one of his first calls was on Eunice Emery。

He always talked like the book o' Revelation; so says he;

‘have you got your weddin' garment on; Miss Emery?' says he。

‘No;' says she; ‘but I ben tryin' to these twenty years。'

She was always full of her jokes; Eunice was!〃



〃The Emerys was always a humorous family;〃

remarked Diadema; as she annihilated a fly with a newspaper。

〃Old Silas Emery was an awful humorous man。  He used to live

up on the island; and there come a freshet one year;

and he said he got his sofy 'n' chairs off; anyhow!〃  That was

just his jokin'。 He hadn't a sign of a sofy in the house;

't was his wife Sophy he meant; she that was Sophy Swett。

Then another time; when I was a little mite of a thin runnin'

in 'n' out o' his yard; he caught holt o' me; and says he;

‘You'd better take care; sissy; when I kill you and two more;

thet'll be three children I've killed!'  Land! you couldn't

drag me inside that yard for years afterwards。

。 。 。 There! she's got a fire in the cook…stove; there's a stream o'

smoke comin' out o' the kitchen chimbley。  I'm willin'

to bet my new rug she's goin' to be married tonight!〃



〃Mebbe she's makin' jell';〃 suggested Hannah Sophia。



〃Jell'!〃 ejaculated Mrs。 Jot scornfully。  〃Do you

s'pose Eunice Emery would build up a fire in the middle o'

the afternoon 'n' go to makin' a jell'; this hot day?

Besides; there ain't a currant gone into her house this week;

as I happen to know。〃



〃It's a dretful thick year for fol'age;〃 mumbled grandpa Bascom;

appearing in the door with his vacant smile。  〃I declare some o'

the maples looks like balls in the air。〃



〃That's the twentieth time he's hed that over since mornin';〃

said Diadema。  〃Here; father; take your hat off 'n' set in the

kitchen door 'n' shell me this mess o' peas。  Now think smart;

'n' put the pods in the basket 'n' the peas in the pan;

don't you mix 'em。〃



The old man hung his hat on the back of the chair; took the pan

in his trembling hands; and began aimlessly to open the pods;

while he chuckled at the hens that gathered round the doorstep

when they heard the peas rattling in the pan。



〃Reuben needs a wife bad enough; if that's all;〃 remarked the

Widow Buzzell; as one who had given the matter some consideration。



〃I should think he did;〃 rejoined old Mrs。 Bascom。

〃Those children 'bout git their livin' off the road in summer;

from the time the dand'lion greens is ready for diggin'

till the blackb'ries 'n' choke…cherries is gone。

Diademy calls 'em in 'n' gives 'em a cooky every time

they go past; 'n' they eat as if they was famished。

Rube Hobson never was any kind of a pervider; 'n' he's

consid'able snug besides。〃



〃He ain't goin' to better himself much;〃 said Almira。

〃Eunice Emery ain't fit to housekeep for a cat。

The pie she took to the pie supper at the church was so tough

that even Deacon Dyer couldn't eat it; and the boys got holt

of her doughnuts; and declared they was goin' fishin' next day

'n' use 'em for sinkers。  She lives from hand to mouth Eunice

Emery does。  She's about as much of a doshy as Rube is。

She'll make tea that's strong enough to bear up an egg; most;

and eat her doughnuts with it three times a day rather than

take the trouble to walk out to the meat or the fish cart。

I know for a fact she don't make riz bread once a year。〃



〃Mebbe her folks likes buttermilk bread best; some do;〃

said the Widow Buzzell。  〃My husband always said; give him

buttermilk bread to work on。  He used to say my riz bread

was so light he'd hev to tread on it to keep it anywheres;

but when you'd eat buttermilk bread he said you'd got somethin'

that stayed by you; you knew where it was every time。

。 。 。 For massy sake! there's the stage stoppin' at the Hobson's door。

I wonder if Rube's first wife's mother has come from Moderation?

If 't is; they must 'a' made up their quarrel; for there was a time

she wouldn't step foot over that doorsill。  She must be goin'

to stay some time; for there's a trunk on the back o' the stage。

。 。 。 No; there ain't nobody gettin' out。  Land; Hannah Sophia;

don't push me clean through the glass!  It beats me why they make winders

so small that three people can't look out of 'em without crowdin'。

Ain't that a wash…boiler he's handin' down?  Well; it's a mercy;

he's ben borrowin' long enough!〃



〃What goes on after dark I ain't responsible for;〃

commented old Mrs。 Bascom; 〃but no new wash…boiler has gone

into Rube Hobson's door in the daytime for many a year;

and I'll be bound it means somethin'。 There goes a broom; too。

Much sweepin' he'll get out o' Eunice; it's a slick 'n'

a promise with her!〃



〃When did you begin to suspicion this; Diademy?〃 asked Almira Berry。

〃I've got as much faculty as the next one; but anybody that lives on the river

road has just got to give up knowin' anything。  You can't keep runnin'

to the store every day; and if you could you don't find out much nowadays。

Bill Peters don't take no more interest in his neighbors than a cow

does in election。〃



〃I can't get mother Bascom to see it as I do;〃 said Diadema;

〃but for one thing she's ben carryin' home bundles 'bout every

other night for a month; though she's ben too smart to buy anythin'

here at this store。  She had Packard's horse to go to Saco last week。

When she got home; jest at dusk; she drove int' the barn;

'n' bimeby Pitt Packard come to git his horse;'t was her own

buggy she went with。  She looked over here when she went int'

the house; 'n' she ketched my eye; though 't was half a mile away;

so she never took a thing in with her; but soon as't was dark she made

three trips out to the barn with a lantern; 'n' any fool could tell

't her arms was full o' pa'cels by the way she carried the lantern。

The Hobsons and the Emerys have married one another more 'n once;

as fur as that goes。  I declare if I was goin' to get married I

should want to be relation to somebody besides my own folks。〃



〃The reason I can hardly credit it;〃 said Hannah Sophia;

〃is because Eunice never had a beau in her life; that I can

remember of。  Cyse Higgins set up with her for a spell;

but it never amounted to nothin'。 It seems queer; too; for she

was always so fond o' seein' men folks round that when Pitt

Packard was shinglin' her barn she used to go out nights

'n' rip some o' the shingles off; so 't he'd hev more days'

work on it。〃



〃I always said 't was she that begun on Rube Hobson;

not him on her;〃 remarked the Widow Buzzell。

〃Their land joinin' made courtin' come dretful handy。

His critters used to git in her field 'bout every other day

(I always suspicioned she broke the fence down herself);

and then she'd hev to go over and git him to drive 'em out。

She's wed his onion bed for him two summers; as I happen to know;

for I've been ou' doors more 'n common this summer; tryin'

to fetch my constitution up。  Diademy; don't you want to look

out the back way 'n' see if Rube's come home yet?〃



〃He ain't;〃 said old Mrs。 Bascom; 〃so you needn't look;

can't you see the curtains is all down?  He's gone up to the Mills;

'n' it's my opinion he's gone to speak to the minister。〃



〃He hed somethin' in the back o' the wagon covered up with an old

linen lap robe; 't ain't at all likely he 'd 'a' hed that if he'd ben goin'

to the minister's;〃 objected Mrs。 Jot。



〃Anybody'd think you was born yesterday; to hear you talk; Diademy;〃

retorted her mother…in…law。 〃When you 've set in one spot's long's

I hev; p'raps you'll hev the use o' your faculties!  Men folks has more

'n one way o' gettin' married; 'specially when they 're ashamed of it。

。 。 。 Well; I vow; there's the little Hobson girls comin' out o'

the door this minute; 'n' they 're all dressed up; and Mote don't seem

to be with 'em。〃



Every woman in the room rose to her feet; and Diadema removed

her murderous eye from a fly which she had been endeavoring to locate

for some moments。



〃I guess they 're goin' up to the church to meet their father 'n' Eunice;

poor little things;〃 ventured the Widow Buzzell。



〃P'raps they be;〃 said old Mrs。 Bascom sarcastically;

〃p'raps they be goin' to church; takin' a three…quart

tin pail 'n' a brown paper bundle along with 'em。

。 。 。 They 're comin' over the bridge; just as I s'posed。

。 。 。 Now; if they come past this house; you head 'em off;

Almiry; 'n' see if you can git some satisfaction out of 'em。

。 。 。 They ain't hardly old enough to hold their tongues。〃



An exciting interview soon took place in the middle of the road;

and Almira r

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