少年维特之烦恼(英文版)-第6章

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of　country　dances　，　and　it　is　all　right　with　me　directly。〃　〃That　is　what
I　meant　，〃　I　replied　；　〃ill…humour　resembles　indolence：　it　is　natural
to　us　；　but　if　once　we　have　courage　to　exert　ourselves　，　we　find　our
work　run　fresh　from　our　hands　，　and　we　experience　in　the　activity　from
which　we　shrank　a　real　enjoyment。〃　Frederica　listened　very　attentively
：　and　the　young　man　objected　，　that　we　were　not　masters　of　ourselves，
and　still　less　so　of　our　feelings。　〃The　question　is　about　a　disagreeable
feeling　，〃　I　added　，　〃from　which　every　one　would　willingly　escape　，
but　none　know　their　own　power　without　trial。　Invalids　are　glad　to　consult
physicians，　and　submit　to　the　most　scrupulous　regimen，　the　most　nauseous
medicines　，　in　order　to　recover　their　health。〃　I　observed　that　the　good
old　man　inclined　his　head　，　and　exerted　himself　to　hear　our　discourse
；　so　I　raised　my　voice　，　and　addressed　myself　directly　to　him。　We　preach
against　a　great　many　crimes　，〃　I　observed，　〃but　I　never　remember　a　sermon
delivered　against　ill…humour。〃　〃That　may　do　very　well　for　your　town　clergymen，
〃　said　he　：　〃country　people　are　never　ill…humoured　；　though　，　indeed，
it　might　be　useful，　occasionally　，　to　my　wife　for　instance，　and　the
judge。〃　We　all　laughed，　as　did　he　likewise　very　cordially，　till　he　fell
into　a　fit　of　coughing，　which　interrupted　our　conversation　for　a　time。
Herr　Schmidt　resumed　the　subject。　〃You　call　ill　humour　a　crime，〃　he　remarked，
〃but　I　think　you　use　too　strong　a　term。〃　〃Not　at　all，〃　I　replied　，　〃if
that　deserves　the　name　which　is　so　pernicious　to　ourselves　and　our　neighbours。
Is　it　not　enough　that　we　want　the　power　to　make　one　another　happy　，　must
we　deprive　each　other　of　the　pleasure　which　we　can　all　make　for　ourselves？
Show　me　the　man　who　has　the　courage　to　hide　his　ill…humour，　who　bears
the　whole　burden　himself，　without　disturbing　the　peace　of　those　around
him。　No　：　ill…humour　arises　from　an　inward　consciousness　of　our　own　want
of　merit，　from　a　discontent　which　ever　acpanies　that　envy　which　foolish
vanity　engenders。　We　see　people　happy　，　whom　we　have　not　made　so　，　and
cannot　endure　the　sight。〃　Charlotte　looked　at　me　with　a　smile　；　she　observed
the　emotion　with　which　I　spoke：　and　a　tear　in　the　eyes　of　Frederica　stimulated
me　to　proceed。　〃Woe　unto　those，〃　I　said，　〃who　use　their　power　over　a
human　heart　to　destroy　the　simple　pleasures　it　would　naturally　enjoy！
All　the　favours　，　all　the　attentions　，　in　the　world　cannot　pensate
for　the　loss　of　that　happiness　which　a　cruel　tyranny　has　destroyed。〃　My
heart　was　full　as　I　spoke。　A　recollection　of　many　things　which　had　happened
pressed　upon　my　mind，　and　filled　my　eyes　with　tears。　〃We　should　daily
repeat　to　ourselves　，〃　I　exclaimed　，　〃that　we　should　not　interfere　with
our　friends　，　unless　to　leave　them　in　possession　of　their　own　joys　，
and　increase　their　happiness　by　sharing　it　with　them！　But　when　their
souls　are　tormented　by　a　violent　passion，　or　their　hearts　rent　with　grief，
is　it　in　your　power　to　afford　them　the　slightest　consolation？

　　〃And　when　the　last　fatal　malady　seizes　the　being　whose　untimely　grave
you　have　prepared　，　when　she　lies　languid　and　exhausted　before　you　，
her　dim　eyes　raised　to　heaven　，　and　the　damp　of　death　upon　her　pallid
brow，　there　you　stand　at　her　bedside　like　a　condemned　criminal　，　with
the　bitter　feeling　that　your　whole　fortune　could　not　save　her　；　and　the
agonising　thought　wrings　you，　that　all　your　efforts　are　powerless　to
impart　even　a　moment's　strength　to　the　departing　soul　，　or　quicken　her
with　a　transitory　consolation。〃

　　At　these　words　the　remembrance　of　a　similar　scene　at　which　I　had　been
once　present　fell　with　full　force　upon　my　heart。　I　buried　my　face　in　my
handkerchief，　and　hastened　from　the　room　，　and　was　only　recalled　to
my　recollection　by　Charlotte's　voice，　who　reminded　me　that　it　was　time
to　return　home。　With　what　tenderness　she　chid　me　on　the　way　for　the　too
eager　interest　I　took　in　everything　！　She　declared　it　would　do　me　injury，
and　that　I　ought　to　spare　myself。　Yes　，　my　angel　！　I　will　do　so　for
your　sake。

　　JULY　6。　She　is　still　with　her　dying　friend，　and　is　still　the　same
bright，　beautiful　creature　whose　presence　softens　pain　，　and　sheds　happiness
around　whichever　way　she　turns。　She　went　out　yesterday　with　her　little
sisters　：　I　knew　it，　and　went　to　meet　them；　and　we　walked　together。
In　about　an　hour　and　a　half　we　returned　to　the　town。　We　stopped　at　the
spring　I　am　so　fond　of，　and　which　is　now　a　thousand　times　dearer　to　me
than　ever。　Charlotte　seated　herself　upon　the　low　wall　，　and　we　gathered
about　her。　I　looked　around，　and　recalled　the　time　when　my　heart　was　unoccupied
and　free。　〃Dear　fountain！〃　I　said，　〃since　that　time　I　have　no　more　e
to　enjoy　cool　repose　by　thy　fresh　stream：　I　have　passed　thee　with　careless
steps　，　and　scarcely　bestowed　a　glance　upon　thee。〃　I　looked　down　，　and
observed　Charlotte's　little　sister，　Jane　，　ing　up　the　steps　with
a　glass　of　water。　I　turned　toward　Charlotte　，　and　I　felt　her　influence
over　me。　Jane　at　the　moment　approached　with　the　glass。　Her　sister　，　Marianne，
wished　to　take　it　from　her。　〃No　！〃　cried　the　child　，　with　the　sweetest
expression　of　face，　〃Charlotte　must　drink　first。〃

　　The　affection　and　simplicity　with　which　this　was　uttered　so　charmed
me，　that　I　sought　to　express　my　feelings　by　catching　up　the　child　and
kissing　her　heartily。　She　was　frightened，　and　began　to　cry。　〃You　should
not　do　that　，〃　said　Charlotte：　I　felt　perplexed。　〃e，　Jane　，〃　she
continued　，　taking　her　hand，　and　leading　her　down　the　steps　again　，
〃it　is　no　matter：　wash　yourself　quickly　in　the　fresh　water。〃　I　stood
and　watched　them；　and　when　I　saw　the　little　dear　rubbing　her　cheeks　with
her　wet　hands　，　in　full　belief　that　all　the　impurities　contracted　from
my　ugly　beard　would　be　washed　off　by　the　miraculous　water　，　and　how，
though　Charlotte　said　it　would　do　，　she　continued　still　to　wash　with
all　her　might　，　as　though　she　thought　too　much　were　better　than　too　little，
I　assure　you，　Wilhelm，　I　never　attended　a　baptism　with　greater　reverence
；　and，　when　Charlotte　came　up　from　the　well　，　I　could　have　prostrated
myself　as　before　the　prophet　of　an　Eastern　nation。

　　In　the　evening　I　would　not　resist　telling　the　story　to　a　person　who，
I　thought　，　possessed　some　natural　feeling　，　because　he　was　a　man　of
understanding。　But　what　a　mistake　I　made。　He　maintained　it　was　very　wrong
of　Charlotte，　that　we　should　not　deceive　children，　that　such　things
occasioned　countless　mistakes　and　superstitions　，　from　which　we　were
bound　to　protect　the　young。　It　occurred　to　me　then，　that　this　very　man
had　been　baptised　only　a　week　before；　so　I　said　nothing　further，　but
maintained　the　justice　of　my　own　convictions。　We　should　deal　with　children
as　God　deals　with　us，　we　are　happiest　under　the　influence　of　innocent
delusions。

　　JULY　8。　What　a　child　is　man　that　he　should　be　so　solicitous　about
a　look！　What　a　child　is　man！　We　had　been　to　Walheim　：　the　ladies　went
in　a　carriage　；　but　during　our　walk　I　thought　I　saw　in　Charlotte's　dark
eyes——　I　am　a　fool——　but　forgive　me　！　you　should　see　them，——　those
eyes。　——　However，　to　be　brief（for　my　own　eyes　are　weighed　down　with
sleep　），　you　must　know，　when　the　ladies　stepped　into　their　carriage
again　，　young　W。　Seldstadt　，　Andran　，　and　I　were　standing　about　the
door。　They　are　a　merry　set　of　fellows　，　and　they　were　all　laughing　and
joking　together。　I　watched　Charlotte's　eyes。　They　wandered　from　one　to
the　other　；　but　they　did　not　light　on　me　，　on　me，　who　stood　there　motionless，
and　who　saw　nothing　but　her　！　My　heart　bade　her　a　thousand　times　adieu，
but　she　noticed　me　not。　The　carriage　drove　off；　and　my　eyes　filled　with
tears。　I　looked　after　her　：　suddenly　I　saw　Charlotte's　bonnet　leaning
out　of　the　window　，　and　she　turned　to　look　back，　was　it　at　me　？　My
dear　friend　，　I　know　not　；　and　in　this　uncertainty　I　find　consolation。
Perhaps　she　turned　to　look　at　me。　Perhaps　！　Good…night　——　what　a　child
I　am！

　　JULY　lO。　You　should　see　how　foolish　I　look　in　pany　when　her　name
is　mentioned，　particularly　when　I　am　asked　plainly　how　I　like　her。　How
I　like　her！　I　detest　the　phrase。　What　sort　of　creature　must　he　be　who
merely　liked　Charlotte，　whose　whole　heart　and　senses　were　not　entirely
absorbed　by　her。　Like　her　！　Some　one　asked　me　lately　how　I　liked　Ossian。

　　JULY　11。　Madame　M　——　is　very　ill。　I　pray　for　her　recovery　，　because
Charlotte　shares　my　sufferings。　I　see　her　occasionally　at　my　friend's
house　，　and　to…day　she　has　told　me　the　strangest　circumstance。　Old　M
——　is　a　covetous，　miserly　fellow　，　who　has　long　worried　and　annoyed
the　poor　lady　sadly　；　but　she　has　borne　her　afflictions　patiently。　A
few　days　ago，　when　the　physician　informed　us　that　her　recovery　was　hopeless，
she　sent　for　her　husband（Charlotte　was　present　），　and　addressed　him
thus：　〃I　have　something　to　confess　，　which，　after　my　decease　，　may
occasion　trouble　and　confusion。　I　have　hitherto　conducted　your　household
as　frugally　and　economically　as　possible，　but　you　must　pardon　me　for
having　defrauded　you　for　thirty　years。　At　the　mencement　of　our　married
life，　you　allowed　a　small　sum　for　the　wants　of　the　kitchen　，　and　the
other　household　expenses。　When　our　establishment　increased　and　our　property
grew　larger　，　I　could　not　persuade　you　to　increase　the　weekly　allowance
in　proportion　：　in　short　，　you　know　，　that　，　when　our　wants　were　greatest，
you　required　me　to　supply　everything　with　seven　florins　a　week。　I　took
the　money　from　you　without　an　observation　，　but　made　up　the　weekly　deficiency
from　the　money…chest；　as　nobody　would　suspect　your　wife　of　robbing　the
household　bank。　But　I　have　wasted　nothing　，　and　should　have　been　content
to　meet　my　eternal　Judge　without　this　confession，　if　she　，　upon　whom
the　management　of　your　establishment　will　devolve　after　my　decease，　would
be　free　from　embarrassment　upon　your　insisting　that　the　allowance　made
to　me　，　your　former　wife　，　was　sufficient。〃

　　I　talked　with　Charlotte　of　the　inconceivable　manner　in　which　men　allow
themselves　to　be　blinded；　how　any　one　could　avoid　suspecting　some　deception，
when　seven　florins　only　were　allowed　to　defray　expenses　twice　as　great。
But　I　have　myself　known　people　who　believed　，　without　any　visible　astonishment，
that　their　house　possessed　the　prophet's　never…failing　cruse　of　oil。

　　JULY　13。　No　，　I　am　not　deceived。　In　her　dark　eyes　I　read　a　genuine
interest　in　me　and　in　my　fortunes。　Yes，　I　feel　it；　and　I　may　believe
my　own　heart　which　tells　me　——　dare　I　say　it？——　dare　I　pronounce
the　divine　words？——　that　she　loves　me！

　　That　she　loves　me　！　How　the　idea　exalts　me　in　my　own　eyes！　And，
as　you　can　understand　my　feelings　，　I　may　say　to　you　，　how　I　honour
myself　since　she　loves　me　！

　　Is　this　presumption　，　or　is　it　a　consciousness　of　the　truth？　I　do
not　know　a　man　able　to　supplant　me　in　the　heart　of　Charlotte；　and　yet
when　she　speaks　of　her　betrothed　with　so　much　warmth　and　affection，　I
feel　like　the　soldier　who　has　been　stripped　of　his