the crime of sylvestre bonnard-第29章

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rremediably　damaged。〃

The　doctor　tries　to　prove　to　me；　with　the　help　of　enormous　Greek　and　Latin　words；　that　I　am　really　in　a　very　good　condition。　　It　would；　of　course；　be　useless　to　attempt　any　demonstration　of　this　kind　in　so　lucid　a　language　as　French。　　However；　I　allow　him　to　persuade　me　at　last；　and　I　see　him　to　the　door。

〃Good！　good！〃　exclaimed　Therese；　〃that　is　the　way　to　put　the　doctor　out　of　the　house！　　Just　do　the　same　thing　once　or　twice　again；　and　he　will　not　come　to　see　you　any　moreand　so　much　the　better？〃

〃Well；　Therese；　now　that　I　have　become　such　a　hearty　man　again；　do　not　refuse　to　give　me　my　letters。　　I　am　sure　there　must　be　quite　a　big　bundle　of　letters；　and　it　would　be　very　wicked　to　keep　me　any　longer　from　reading　them。〃

Therese；　after　some　little　grumbling；　gave　me　my　letters。　　But　what　did　it　matter？I　looked　at　all　the　envelopes；　and　saw　that　no　one　of　them　had　been　addressed　by　the　little　hand　which　I　so　much　wish　I　could　see　here　now；　turning　over　the　pages　of　the　Vecellio。　　I　pushed　the　whole　bundle　of　letters　away：　　they　had　no　more　interest　for　me。


April…June


It　was　a　hotly　contested　engagement。

〃Wait；　Monsieur；　until　I　have　put　on　my　clean　things；〃　exclaimed　Therese；　〃and　I　will　go　out　with　you　this　time　also；　I　will　carry　your　folding…stool　as　I　have　been　doing　these　last　few　days；　and　we　will　go　and　sit　down　somewhere　in　the　sun。〃

Therese　actually　thinks　me　infirm。　　I　have　been　sick；　it　is　true；　but　there　is　an　end　to　all　things！　　Madame　Malady　has　taken　her　departure　quite　awhile　ago；　and　it　is　now　more　than　three　months　since　her　pale　and　gracious…visaged　handmaid；　Dame　Convalescence；　politely　bade　me　farewell。　　If　I　were　to　listen　to　my　housekeeper；　I　should　become　a　veritable　Monsieur　Argant；　and　I　should　wear　a　nightcap　with　ribbons　for　the　rest　of　my　life。。。。　　No　more　of　this！　I　propose　to　go　out　by　myself！　　Therese　will　not　hear　of　it。　　She　takes　my　folding…stool；　and　wants　to　follow　me。

〃Therese；　to…morrow；　if　you　like；　we　will　take　our　seats　on　the　sunny　side　of　the　wall　of　La　Petite　Provence　and　stay　there　just　as　long　as　you　please。　　But　to…day　I　have　some　very　important　affairs　to　attend　to。〃

〃So　much　the　better！　　But　your　affairs　are　not　the　only　affairs　in　this　world。〃

I　beg；　I　scold；　I　make　my　escape。

It　is　quite　a　pleasant　day。　　With　the　aid　of　a　cab　and　the　help　of　almighty　God；　I　trust　to　be　able　to　fulfil　my　purpose。

There　is　the　wall　on　which　is　painted　in　great　blue　letters　the　words　〃Pensionnat　de　Demoiselles　tenu　par　Mademoiselle　Virginie　Prefere。〃　　There　is　the　iron　gate　which　would　give　free　entrance　into　the　court…yard　if　it　were　ever　opened。　　But　the　lock　is　rusty；　and　sheets　of　zinc　put　up　behind　the　bars　protect　the　indiscreet　observation　those　dear　little　souls　to　whom　Mademoiselle　Prefere　doubtless　teaches　modesty；　sincerity；　justice；　and　disinterestedness。　There　is　a　window；　with　iron　bars　before　it；　and　panes　daubed　over　with　white　paintthe　window　of　the　domestic　offices；　like　a　glazed　eyethe　only　aperture　of　the　building　opening　upon　the　exterior　world。　　As　for　the　house…door；　through　which　I　entered　so　often；　but　which　is　now　closed　against　me　for　ever；　it　is　just　as　I　saw　it　the　last　time；　with　its　little　iron…grated　wicket。　　The　single　stone　step　in　front　of　it　is　deeply　worn；　and；　without　having　very　good　eyes　behind　my　spectacles；　I　can　see　the　little　white　scratches　on　the　stone　which　have　been　made　by　the　nails　in　the　shoes　of　the　girls　going　in　and　out。　　And　why　cannot　I　also　go　in？　　I　have　a　feeling　that　Jeanne　must　be　suffering　a　great　deal　in　this　dismal　house；　and　that　she　calls　my　name　in　secret。　　I　cannot　go　away　from　the　gate！　　A　strange　anxiety　takes　hold　of　me。　　I　pull　the　bell。　The　scared…looking　servant　comes　to　the　door；　even　more　scared…　looking　than　when　I　saw　her　the　last　time。　　Strict　orders　have　been　given；　I　am　not　to　be　allowed　to　see　Mademoiselle　Jeanne。　　I　beg　the　servant　to　be　so　kind　as　to　tell　me　how　the　child　is。　　The　servant；　after　looking　to　her　right　and　then　to　her　left；　tells　me　that　Mademoiselle　Jeanne　is　well；　and　then　shuts　the　door　in　my　face。　　And　I　am　all　alone　in　the　street　again。

How　many　times　since　then　have　I　wandered　in　the　same　way　under　that　wall；　and　passed　before　the　little　door；full　of　shame　and　despair　to　find　myself　even　weaker　than　that　poor　child；　who　has　no　other　help　of　friend　except　myself　in　the　world！

Finally　I　overcame　my　repugnance　sufficiently　to　call　upon　Maitre　Mouche。　　The　first　thing　I　remarked　was　that　his　office　is　much　more　dusty　and　much　more　mouldy　this　year　that　it　was　last　year。　　The　notary　made　his　appearance　after　a　moment；　with　his　familiar　stiff　gestures；　and　his　restless　eyes　quivering　behind　his　eye…glasses。　I　made　my　complaints　to　him。　　He　answered　me。。。。　　But　why　should　I　write　down；　even　in　a　notebook　which　I　am　going　to　burn；　my　recollections　of　a　downright　scoundrel？　　He　takes　sides　with　Mademoiselle　Prefere；　whose　intelligent　mind　and　irreproachable　character　he　has　long　appreciated。　　He　does　not　feel　himself　in　a　position　to　decide　the　nature　of　the　question　at　issue；　but　he　must　assure　me　that　appearances　have　been　greatly　against　me。　　That　of　course　makes　no　difference　to　me。　　He　adds（and　this　does　make　some　sense　to　me）that　the　small　sum　which　had　been　placed　in　his　hands　to　defray　the　expenses　of　the　education　of　his　ward　has　been　expended；　and　that；　in　view　of　the　circumstances；　he　cannot　but　gently　admire　the　disinterestedness　of　Mademoiselle　Prefere　in　consenting　to　allow　Mademoiselle　Jeanne　to　remain　with　her。

A　magnificent　light；　the　light　of　a　perfect　day；　floods　the　sordid　place　with　its　incorruptible　torrent；　and　illuminates　teh　person　of　that　man！

And　outside　it　pours　down　its　splendour　upon　all　the　wretchedness　of　a　populous　quarter。

How　sweet　it　is；this　light　with　which　my　eyes　have　so　long　been　filled；　and　which　ere　long　I　must　for　ever　cease　to　enjoy！　　I　wander　out　with　my　hands　behind　me；　dreaming　as　I　go；　following　the　line　of　the　fortifications；　and　I　find　myself　after　awhile；　I　know　not　how；　in　an　out…of…the…way　suburb　full　of　miserable　little　gardens。　　By　the　dusty　roadside　I　observe　a　plant　whose　flower；　at　once　dark　and　splendid；　seems　worthy　of　association　with　the　noblest　and　purest　mouning　for　the　dead。　　It　is　a　columbine。　　Our　fathers　called　it　〃Our　Lady's　Glove〃le　gant　de　Notre…Dame。　　Only　such　a　〃Notre…Dame〃　as　might　make　herself　very；　very　small；　for　the　sake　of　appearing　to　little　children；　could　ever　slip　her　dainty　fingers　into　the　narrow　capsue　of　that　flower。

And　there　is　a　big　bumble…bee　who　tries　to　force　himself　into　the　flower；　brutally；　but　his　mouth　cannot　reach　the　nectar；　and　the　poor　glutton　strives　and　strives　in　vain。　　He　has　to　give　up　the　attempt；　and　comes　out　of　the　flower　all　smeared　over　with　pollen。　He　flies　off　in　his　own　heavy　lumbering　way；　but　there　are　not　many　flowers　in　this　portion　of　the　suburbs；　which　has　been　defiled　by　the　soot　and　smoke　of　factories。　　So　he　comes　back　to　the　columbine　again；　and　this　time　he　pierces　the　corolla　and　sucks　the　honey　through　the　little　hole　which　he　has　made；　I　should　never　have　thought　that　a　bumble…bee　had　so　much　sense！　　Why；　that　is　admirble！　　The　more　I　observe；　them；　the　more　do　insects　and　flowers　fill　me　with　astonishment。　　I　am　like　that　good　Rollin　who　went　wild　with　delight　over　the　flowers　of　his　peach…trees。　　I　wish　I　could　have　a　fine　garden；　and　live　at　the　verge　of　a　wood。


August；　September。


It　occurred　to　me　one　Sunday　morning　to　watch　for　the　moment　when　Mademoiselle　Prefere's　pupils　were　leaving　the　school　in　procession　to　attand　Mass　at　the　parish　church。　　I　watched　them　passing　two　by　two；the　little　ones　first　with　very　serious　faces。　　There　were　three　of　them　all　dressed　exactly　alikedumpy；　plump；　important…　looking　little　creatures；　whom　I　recognized　at　once　as　the　Mouton　girls。　　Their　elder　sister　is　the　artist　who　drew　that　terrrible　head　of　Tatius；　King　of　the　Sabines。　　Beside　the　column；　the　assistant　school…teacher；　with　her　prayer…book　in　her　hand；　was　gesturing　and　frowning。　　Then　came　the　next　oldest　class；　and　finally　the　big　girls；　all　whispering　to　each　other；　as　they　went　by。　　But　I　did　not　see　Jeanne。

I　went　to　police…headquarters　and　inquired　whether　they　chanced　to　have；　filed　away　somewhere　or　other；　any　information　regarding　the　establishment　in　the　Rue　Demours。　　I　succeeded　in　inducing　them　to　send　some　female　inspectors　there。　　These　returned　bringing　with　them　the　most　favourable　reports　about　the　establishment。　　In　their　opinion　the　Prefere　School　was　a　model　school。　　It　is　evident　that　if　I　were　to　force　an　investigation；　Mademoiselle　Prefere　would　receive　academic　honours。


October　3。


This　Thursday　being　a　school…holiday　I　had　teh　chance　of　meeting　the　three　little　Mouton　girls　in　the　vicinity　of　the　Rue　Demours。　　After　bowing　to　their　mother；　I　asked　the　eldest　who　appears　to　be　about　ten　years　old；　how　was　her　playmate；　Mademoiselle　Jeanne　Alexandre。

The　little　Mouton　girl　answered　me；　all　in　a　breath；

〃Jeanne　Alexandre　is　not　my　playmate。　　She　is　only　kept　in　the　school　for　charityso　they　make　her　sweep　the　class…rooms。　　It　was　Mademoiselle　who　said　so。　　And　Jeanne　Alexandre　is　a　bad　girl；　so　they　lock　her　up　in　the　dark　roomand　it　serves　her　rightand　I　am　a　good　girland　I　am　never　locked　up　in　the　dark　room。〃

The　three　little　girls　resumed　their　walk；　and　Madame　Mouton　followed　close　behind　them；　looking　back　over　her　broad　shoulder　at　me；　in　a　very　suspicious　manner。

Alas！　　I　find　myself　reduced　to　expedients　of　a　questionable　character。　　Madame　de　Gabry　will　not　come　back　to　Paris　for　at　least　three　months　more；　at　the　very　soonest。　　Without　her；　I　have　no　tact；　I　have　no　common　senseI　am　nothing　but　a　cumbersome；　clumsy；　mischief…making　machine。

Nevertheless；　I　cannot　possibly　permit　them　to　make　Jeanne　a　boarding…school　servant！


December　28。


The　idea　that　Jeanne　was　obliged　to　sweep　the　rooms　had　become　absolutely　unbearable。

The　weather　was　dark　and　cold。　　Night　had　already　begun。　　I　rang　the　school…door　bell　with　the　tranquillity　of　a　resolute　man。　　The　moment　that　the　timid　servant　opened　the　door；　I　slipped　a　gold　piece　into　her　hand；　and　promised　her　another　if　she　would　arrange　matters　so　that　I　could　see　Mademoiselle　Alexandre。　　Her　answer　was；

〃In　one　hour　from　now；　at　the　grated　window。〃

And　she　slammed　the　door　in　my　face　so　rudely　that　she　knocked　my　hat　into　the　gutter。　　I　waited　for　one　very　long　hour　in　a　violent　snow…storm；　then　I　approached　the　window。　　Nothing！　　The　wind　raged；　and　the　snow　fell　heavily。　　Workmen　passing　by　with　their　implements　on　their　shoulders；　and　their　heads　bent　down　to　keep　the　snow　from　coming　in　their　faces；　rudely　jostled　me。　　Still　nothing。　　I　began　to　fear　I　had　been　observed。　　I　knew　that　I　had　done　wrong　in　bribing　a　servant；　but　I　was　not　a　bit　sorry　for　it。　　Woe　to　the　man　who　does　not　know　how　to　break　through　social　regulations　in　case　of　necessity！　　Another　quarter　of　an　hour　passed。　　Nothing。　　At　last　the　window　was　partly　opened。

〃Is　that　you；　Monsieur　Bonnard？〃

Is　that　you；　Jeanne？tell　me　at　once　what　has　become　of　you。〃

〃I　am　wellvery　well。〃

〃But　what　else！〃