the complete plays-第112章
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sorry to appear ungallant； but this is Saturday； and you have
been following me about ever since Monday。 I should like the
usual half…holiday。 I shall take it as a personal favour if you
will kindly allow me to close early to…day。
SAPHIR Oh； sir； do not send us from you！
GROS。 Poor； poor girls！ It is best to speak plainly。 I know
that I am loved by you； but I never can love you in return； for
my heart is fixed elsewhere！ Remember the fable of the Magnet
and the Churn。
ANGELA ＇wildly＇ But we don't know the fable of the Magnet and
the Churn！
GROS。 Don't you？ Then I will sing it to you。
No。 13。 A magnet hung in a hardware shop
（Solo and Chorus）
Grosvenor and Maidens
GROSVENOR A magnet hung in a hardware shop；
And all around was a loving crop
Of scissors and needles； nails and knives；
Offering love for all their lives；
But for iron the magnet felt no whim；
Though he charmed iron； it charmed not him；
From needles and nails and knives he'd turn；
For he'd set his love on a Silver Churn！
MAIDENS A Silver Churn！
GROSVENOR A Silver Churn！
His most aesthetic；
Very magnetic
Fancy took this turn
〃If I can wheedle
A knife or a needle；
Why not a Silver Churn？〃
MAIDENS His most aesthetic；
Very magnetic
Fancy took this turn
〃If I can wheedle
A knife or a needle；
Why not a Silver Churn？〃
GROSVENOR ＇He rises； going C。＇
And Iron and Steel expressed surprise；
The needles opened their well…drilled eyes；
The penknives felt 〃shut up〃； no doubt；
The scissors declared themselves 〃cut out〃；
The kettles they boiled with rage； 'tis said；
While ev'ry nail went off its head；
And hither and thither began to roam；
Till a hammer came up and drove them home。
MAIDENS It drove them home？
GROSVENOR It drove them home！
While this magnetic；
Peripatetic
Lover he lived to learn；
By no endeavour
Can magnet ever
Attract a Silver Churn！
MAIDENS While this magnetic；
Peripatetic
Lover he lived to learn；
MAIDENS and
GROSVENOR By no endeavour
Can magnet ever
Attract a Silver Churn！
＇They go off in low spirits； R。U。E。； gazing back at him from time
to time。＇
GROS。 At last they are gone！ What is this mysterious
fascination that I seem to exercise over all I come across？ A
curse on my fatal beauty； for I am sick of conquests！ ＇Goes R。＇
＇Enter PATIENCE； L。 Stops L。C。 on seeing GROSVENOR。＇
GROS。 ＇Turns and sees her。＇ Patience！
PATIENCE I have escaped with difficulty from my Reginald。 I
wanted to see you so much that I might ask you if you still love
me as fondly as ever？
GROS。 Love you？ If the devotion of a lifetime ＇seizing her
hand。＇
PATIENCE ＇indignantly＇ Hold！ Unhand me； or I scream！ ＇He
releases her。＇ If you are a gentleman； pray remember that I am
another's！ ＇very tenderly。＇ But you do love me； don't you？
GROS。 Madly； hopelessly； despairingly！
PATIENCE That's right！ I never can be yours； but that's right！
GROS。 And you love this Bunthorne？
PATIENCE With a heart…whole ecstasy that withers； and scorches；
and burns； and stings！ ＇sadly＇ It is my duty。
GROS。 Admirable girl！ But you are not happy with him？
PATIENCE Happy？ I am miserable beyond description！
GROS。 That's right！ I never can be yours； but that's right！
PATIENCE But go now。 I see dear Reginald approaching。
Farewell； dear Archibald； I cannot tell you how happy it has made
me to know that you still love me。
GROS。 Ah； if I only dared ＇advancing towards her＇
PATIENCE Sir！ this language to one who is promised to another！
＇tenderly＇ Oh； Archibald； think of me sometimes； for my heart is
breaking！ He is unkind to me； and you would be so loving！
GROS。 Loving！ ＇advancing towards her＇
PATIENCE Advance one step； and as I am a good and pure woman； I
scream！ ＇tenderly＇ Farewell； Archibald！ ＇sternly＇ Stop there！
＇tenderly＇ Think of me sometimes！ ＇angrily＇ Advance at your
peril！ Once more； adieu！
＇GROSVENOR sighs； gazes sorrowfully at her； sighs deeply； and
exits； R。 She bursts into tears。＇
＇Enter BUNTHORNE； followed by JANE。 He is moody and
preoccupied。＇
In a doleful train
（Solo）
Jane
JANE In a doleful train
One and one I walk all day；
For I love in vain
None so sorrowful as they
Who can only sigh and say；
Woe is me； alackaday！
BUN。 ＇seeing PATIENCE＇ Crying； eh？ What are you crying about？
PATIENCE I've only been thinking how dearly I love you！
BUN。 Love me！ Bah！
JANE Love him！ Bah！
BUN。 ＇to JANE＇ Don't you interfere。
JANE He always crushes me！
PATIENCE ＇going to him＇ What is the matter； dear Reginald？ If
you have any sorrow； tell it to me； that I may share it with you。
＇sighing＇ It is my duty！
BUN。 ＇snappishly＇ Whom were you talking with just now？
PATIENCE With dear Archibald。
BUN。 ＇furiously＇ With dear Archibald！ Upon my honour； this is
too much！
JANE A great deal too much！
BUN。 ＇angrily to JANE＇ Do be quiet！
JANE Crushed again！
PATIENCE I think he is the noblest； purest； and most perfect
being I have ever met。 But I don't love him。 It is true that he
is devotedly attached to me； but I don't love him。 Whenever he
grows affectionate； I scream。 It is my duty！ ＇sighing＇
BUN。 I dare say！
JANE So do I！ I dare say！
PATIENCE Why； how could I love him and love you too？ You can't
love two people at once！
BUN。 Oh； can't you； though！
PATIENCE No； you can't； I only wish you could。
BUN。 I don't believe you know what love is！
PATIENCE ＇sighing＇ Yes； I do。 There was a happy time when I
didn't； but a bitter experience has taught me。
＇BUNTHORNE； noticing that JANE is not looking at him； goes off
quickly up R。 She turns； sees him； and runs after him。＇
No。 14。 Love is a plaintive song
（Solo）
Patience
PATIENCE Love is a plaintive song；
Sung by a suff'ring maid；
Telling a tale of wrong；
Telling of hope betrayed；
Tuned to each changing note；
Sorry when he is sad；
Blind to his ev'ry mote；
Merry when he is glad！
Merry when he is glad！
Love that no wrong can cure；
Love that is always new；
That is the love that's pure；
That is the love that's true！
Love that no wrong can cure；
Love that is always new；
That is the love that's pure；
That is the love； the love that's true！
Rendering good for ill；
Smiling at ev'ry frown；
Yielding your own self…will；
Laughing your teardrops down；
Never a selfish whim；
Trouble； or pain to stir；
Everything for him；
Nothing at all for her！
Nothing at all for her！
Love that will aye endure；
Though the rewards be few；
That is the love that's pure；
That is the love that's true！
Love that will aye endure；
Though the rewards be few；
That is the love that's pure；
That is the love； the love that's true！
＇At the end of ballad exit PATIENCE； L。； weeping。 Enter
BUNTHORNE； R。； JANE following。＇
BUN。 Everything has gone wrong with me since that smug…faced
idiot came here。 Before that I was admired I may say； loved。
JANE Too mild adored！
BUN。 Do let a poet soliloquize！ The damozels used to follow me
wherever I went； now they all follow him！
JANE Not all！ I am still faithful to you。
BUN。 Yes； and a pretty damozel you are！
JANE No； not pretty。 Massive。 Cheer up！ I will never leave
you； I swear it！
BUN。 Oh； thank you！ I know what it is； it's his confounded
mildness。 They find me too highly spiced； if you please！ And no
doubt I am highly spiced。
JANE Not for my taste！
BUN。 ＇savagely＇ No； but I am for theirs。 But I will show the
world I can be as mild as he。 If they want insipidity； they
shall have it。 I'll meet this fellow on his own ground and beat
him on it。
JANE You shall。 And I will help you。
BUN。 You will？ Jane； there's a good deal of good in you； after
all！
No。 15。 So go to him and say to him
（Duet）
Jane and Bunthorne
＇Dance＇
JANE So go to him and say to him； with compliment ironical
BUNTHORNE Sing 〃Hey to you
Good…day to you〃
And that's what I shall say！
JANE 〃Your style is much too sanctified your cut is too
canonical〃
BUNTHORNE Sing 〃Bah to you
Ha！ ha！ to you〃
And that's what I shall say！
JANE 〃I was the beau ideal of the morbid young aesthetical
To doubt my inspiration was regarded as heretical
Until you cut me out with your placidity emetical。〃
BUNTHORNE Sing 〃Booh to you
Pooh； pooh to you〃
And that's what I shall say！
Sing 〃Booh to you
Pooh； pooh to you〃
And that's what I shall say！
JANE BUNTHORNE
Sing 〃Hey to you good…day to you〃 〃Hey；
Sing 〃Bah to you ha！ ha！ to you〃 Good…day
Sing 〃Booh to you pooh； pooh to you〃 Bah。
And that's what you should say！ ha！ ha！
Sing 〃Hey to you good…day to yo
