the uncommercial traveller-第66章

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things　（and　no　worse）；　no　coming　event　cast　its　shadow　before。



I　might　but　a　few　moments　previously　have　imitated　Sterne；　and

said；　'〃And　yet；　methinks；　Eugenius；〃　…　laying　my　forefinger

wistfully　on　his　coat…sleeve；　thus；　…　〃and　yet；　methinks；　Eugenius；

'tis　but　sorry　work　to　part　with　thee；　for　what　fresh　fields；　。　。　。

my　dear　Eugenius；　。　。　。　can　be　fresher　than　thou　art；　and　in　what

pastures　new　shall　I　find　Eliza；　or　call　her；　Eugenius；　if　thou

wilt；　Annie？〃'　…　I　say　I　might　have　done　this；　but　Eugenius　was

gone；　and　I　hadn't　done　it。



I　was　resting　on　a　skylight　on　the　hurricane…deck；　watching　the

working　of　the　ship　very　slowly　about；　that　she　might　head　for

England。　　It　was　high　noon　on　a　most　brilliant　day　in　April；　and

the　beautiful　bay　was　glorious　and　glowing。　　Full　many　a　time；　on

shore　there；　had　I　seen　the　snow　come　down；　down；　down　（itself　like

down）；　until　it　lay　deep　in　all　the　ways　of　men；　and　particularly；

as　it　seemed；　in　my　way；　for　I　had　not　gone　dry…shod　many　hours　for

months。　　Within　two　or　three　days　last　past　had　I　watched　the

feathery　fall　setting　in　with　the　ardour　of　a　new　idea；　instead　of

dragging　at　the　skirts　of　a　worn…out　winter；　and　permitting

glimpses　of　a　fresh　young　spring。　　But　a　bright　sun　and　a　clear　sky

had　melted　the　snow　in　the　great　crucible　of　nature；　and　it　had

been　poured　out　again　that　morning　over　sea　and　land；　transformed

into　myriads　of　gold　and　silver　sparkles。



The　ship　was　fragrant　with　flowers。　　Something　of　the　old　Mexican

passion　for　flowers　may　have　gradually　passed　into　North　America；

where　flowers　are　luxuriously　grown；　and　tastefully　combined　in　the

richest　profusion；　but；　be　that　as　it　may；　such　gorgeous　farewells

in　flowers　had　come　on　board；　that　the　small　officer's　cabin　on

deck；　which　I　tenanted；　bloomed　over　into　the　adjacent　scuppers；

and　banks　of　other　flowers　that　it　couldn't　hold　made　a　garden　of

the　unoccupied　tables　in　the　passengers'　saloon。　　These　delicious

scents　of　the　shore；　mingling　with　the　fresh　airs　of　the　sea；　made

the　atmosphere　a　dreamy；　an　enchanting　one。　　And　so；　with　the　watch

aloft　setting　all　the　sails；　and　with　the　screw　below　revolving　at

a　mighty　rate；　and　occasionally　giving　the　ship　an　angry　shake　for

resisting；　I　fell　into　my　idlest　ways；　and　lost　myself。



As；　for　instance；　whether　it　was　I　lying　there；　or　some　other

entity　even　more　mysterious；　was　a　matter　I　was　far　too　lazy　to

look　into。　　What　did　it　signify　to　me　if　it　were　I？　or　to　the　more

mysterious　entity；　if　it　were　he？　　Equally　as　to　the　remembrances

that　drowsily　floated　by　me；　or　by　him；　why　ask　when　or　where　the

things　happened？　　Was　it　not　enough　that　they　befell　at　some　time；

somewhere？



There　was　that　assisting　at　the　church　service　on　board　another

steamship；　one　Sunday；　in　a　stiff　breeze。　　Perhaps　on　the　passage

out。　　No　matter。　　Pleasant　to　hear　the　ship's　bells　go　as　like

church…bells　as　they　could；　pleasant　to　see　the　watch　off　duty

mustered　and　come　in：　　best　hats；　best　Guernseys；　washed　hands　and

faces；　smoothed　heads。　　But　then　arose　a　set　of　circumstances　so

rampantly　comical；　that　no　check　which　the　gravest　intentions　could

put　upon　them　would　hold　them　in　hand。　　Thus　the　scene。　　Some

seventy　passengers　assembled　at　the　saloon　tables。　　Prayer…books　on

tables。　　Ship　rolling　heavily。　　Pause。　　No　minister。　　Rumour　has

related　that　a　modest　young　clergyman　on　board　has　responded　to　the

captain's　request　that　he　will　officiate。　　Pause　again；　and　very

heavy　rolling。



Closed　double　doors　suddenly　burst　open；　and　two　strong　stewards

skate　in；　supporting　minister　between　them。　　General　appearance　as

of　somebody　picked　up　drunk　and　incapable；　and　under　conveyance　to

station…house。　　Stoppage；　pause；　and　particularly　heavy　rolling。

Stewards　watch　their　opportunity；　and　balance　themselves；　but

cannot　balance　minister；　who；　struggling　with　a　drooping　head　and　a

backward　tendency；　seems　determined　to　return　below；　while　they　are

as　determined　that　he　shall　be　got　to　the　reading…desk　in　mid…

saloon。　　Desk　portable；　sliding　away　down　a　long　table；　and　aiming

itself　at　the　breasts　of　various　members　of　the　congregation。　　Here

the　double　doors；　which　have　been　carefully　closed　by　other

stewards；　fly　open　again；　and　worldly　passenger　tumbles　in；

seemingly　with　pale…ale　designs：　　who；　seeking　friend；　says　'Joe！'

Perceiving　incongruity；　says；　'Hullo！　　Beg　yer　pardon！'　and　tumbles

out　again。　　All　this　time　the　congregation　have　been　breaking　up

into　sects；　…　as　the　manner　of　congregations　often　is；　each　sect

sliding　away　by　itself；　and　all　pounding　the　weakest　sect　which

slid　first　into　the　corner。　　Utmost　point　of　dissent　soon　attained

in　every　corner；　and　violent　rolling。　　Stewards　at　length　make　a

dash；　conduct　minister　to　the　mast　in　the　centre　of　the　saloon；

which　he　embraces　with　both　arms；　skate　out；　and　leave　him　in　that

condition　to　arrange　affairs　with　flock。



There　was　another　Sunday；　when　an　officer　of　the　ship　read　the

service。　　It　was　quiet　and　impressive；　until　we　fell　upon　the

dangerous　and　perfectly　unnecessary　experiment　of　striking　up　a

hymn。　　After　it　was　given　out；　we　all　rose；　but　everybody　left　it

to　somebody　else　to　begin。　　Silence　resulting；　the　officer　（no

singer　himself）　rather　reproachfully　gave　us　the　first　line　again；

upon　which　a　rosy　pippin　of　an　old　gentleman；　remarkable　throughout

the　passage　for　his　cheerful　politeness；　gave　a　little　stamp　with

his　boot　（as　if　he　were　leading　off　a　country　dance）；　and　blithely

warbled　us　into　a　show　of　joining。　　At　the　end　of　the　first　verse

we　became；　through　these　tactics；　so　much　refreshed　and　encouraged；

that　none　of　us；　howsoever　unmelodious；　would　submit　to　be　left　out

of　the　second　verse；　while　as　to　the　third　we　lifted　up　our　voices

in　a　sacred　howl　that　left　it　doubtful　whether　we　were　the　more

boastful　of　the　sentiments　we　united　in　professing；　or　of

professing　them　with　a　most　discordant　defiance　of　time　and　tune。



'Lord　bless　us！'　thought　I；　when　the　fresh　remembrance　of　these

things　made　me　laugh　heartily　alone　in　the　dead　water…gurgling

waste　of　the　night；　what　time　I　was　wedged　into　my　berth　by　a

wooden　bar；　or　I　must　have　rolled　out　of　it；　'what　errand　was　I

then　upon；　and　to　what　Abyssinian　point　had　public　events　then

marched？　　No　matter　as　to　me。　　And　as　to　them；　if　the　wonderful

popular　rage　for　a　plaything　（utterly　confounding　in　its

inscrutable　unreason）　I　had　not　then　lighted　on　a　poor　young　savage

boy；　and　a　poor　old　screw　of　a　horse；　and　hauled　the　first　off　by

the　hair　of　his　princely　head　to　〃inspect〃　the　British　volunteers；

and　hauled　the　second　off　by　the　hair　of　his　equine　tail　to　the

Crystal　Palace；　why　so　much　the　better　for　all　of　us　outside

Bedlam！'



So；　sticking　to　the　ship；　I　was　at　the　trouble　of　asking　myself

would　I　like　to　show　the　grog　distribution　in　'the　fiddle'　at　noon

to　the　Grand　United　Amalgamated　Total　Abstinence　Society？　　Yes；　I

think　I　should。　　I　think　it　would　do　them　good　to　smell　the　rum；

under　the　circumstances。　　Over　the　grog；　mixed　in　a　bucket；

presides　the　boatswain's　mate；　small　tin　can　in　hand。　　Enter　the

crew；　the　guilty　consumers；　the　grown…up　brood　of　Giant　Despair；　in

contradistinction　to　the　band　of　youthful　angel　Hope。　　Some　in

boots；　some　in　leggings；　some　in　tarpaulin　overalls；　some　in

frocks；　some　in　pea…coats；　a　very　few　in　jackets；　most　with

sou'wester　hats；　all　with　something　rough　and　rugged　round　the

throat；　all；　dripping　salt　water　where　they　stand；　all　pelted　by

weather；　besmeared　with　grease；　and　blackened　by　the　sooty　rigging。



Each　man's　knife　in　its　sheath　in　his　girdle；　loosened　for　dinner。

As　the　first　man；　with　a　knowingly　kindled　eye；　watches　the　filling

of　the　poisoned　chalice　（truly　but　a　very　small　tin　mug；　to　be

prosaic）；　and；　tossing　back　his　head；　tosses　the　contents　into

himself；　and　passes　the　empty　chalice　and　passes　on；　so　the　second

man　with　an　anticipatory　wipe　of　his　mouth　on　sleeve　or

handkerchief；　bides　his　turn；　and　drinks　and　hands　and　passes　on；

in　whom；　and　in　each　as　his　turn　approaches；　beams　a　knowingly

kindled　eye；　a　brighter　temper；　and　a　suddenly　awakened　tendency　to

be　jocose　with　some　shipmate。　　Nor　do　I　even　observe　that　the　man

in　charge　of　the　ship's　lamps；　who　in　right　of　his　office　has　a

double　allowance　of　poisoned　chalices；　seems　thereby　vastly

degraded；　even　though　he　empties　the　chalices　into　himself；　one

after　the　other；　much　as　if　he　were　delivering　their　contents　at

some　absorbent　establishment　in　which　he　had　no　personal　interest。

But　vastly　comforted；　I　note　them　all　to　be；　on　deck　presently；

even　to　the　circulation　of　redder　blood　in　their　cold　blue

knuckles；　and　when　I　look　up　at　them　lying　out　on　the　yards；　and

holding　on　for　life　among　the　beating　sails；　I　cannot　for　MY　life

see　the　justice　of　visiting　on　them　…　or　on　me　…　the　drunken　crimes

of　any　number　of　criminals　arraigned　at　the　heaviest　of　assizes。



Abetting　myself　in　my　idle　humour；　I　closed　my　eyes；　and　recalled

life　on　board　of　one　of　those　mail…packets；　as　I　lay；　part　of　that

day；　in　the　Bay　of　New　York；　O！　　The　regular　life　began　…　mine

always　did；　for　I　never　got　to　sleep　afterwards　…　with　the　rigging

of　the　pump　while　it　was　yet　dark；　and　washing　down　of　decks。　　Any

enormous　giant　at　a　prodigious　hydropathic　establishment；

conscientiously　undergoing　the　water…cure　in　all　its　departments；

and　extremely　particular　about　cleaning　his　teeth；　would　make　those

noises。　　Swash；　splash；　scrub；　rub；　toothbrush；　bubble；　swash；

splash；　bubble；　toothbrush；　splash；　splash；　bubble；　rub。　　Then　the

day　would　break；　and；　descending　from　my　berth　by　a　graceful　ladder

composed　of　half…opened　drawers　beneath　it；　I　would　reopen　my　outer

dead…light　and　my　inner　sliding　window　（closed　by　a　watchman　during

the　water…cure）；　and　would　look　out　at　the　long…rolling；　lead…

coloured；　white　topped　waves　over　which　the　dawn；　on　a　cold　winter

morning；　cast　a　level；　lonely　glance；　and　through　which　the　ship

fought　her　melancholy　way　at　a　terrific　rate。　　And　now；　lying　down

again；　awaiting　the　season　for　broiled　ham　and　tea；　I　would　be

compelled　to　listen　to　the　voice　of　conscience；　…　the　screw。



It　might　be；　in　some　cases；　no　more　than　the　voice　of　stomach；　but

I　called　it　in　my　fancy　by　the　higher　name。　　Because　it　seemed　to

me　that　we　were　all　of　us；　all　day　long；　endeavouring　to　stifle　the

voice。　　Because　it　was　under　everybody's　pillow；　everybody's　plate；

everybody's　camp…stool；　everybody's　book；　everybody's　occupation。

Because　we　pretended　not　to　hear　it；　especially　at　meal…times；

evening　whist；　and　morning　conversation　on　deck；　but　it　was　always

among　us　in　an　under　monotone；　not　to　be　drowned　in　pea…soup；　not

to　be　shuffled　with　cards；　not　to　be　diverted　by　books；　not　to　be

knitted　into　any　pattern；　not　to　be　walked　away　from。　　It　was