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the voice of the city-µÚ6ÕÂ

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20£»000¡¡worth¡¡of¡¡paraphernalia¡£



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Blest¡¡be¡¡the¡¡bride¡£









THE¡¡HARBINGER





Long¡¡before¡¡the¡¡springtide¡¡is¡¡felt¡¡in¡¡the¡¡dull¡¡bosom

of¡¡the¡¡yokel¡¡does¡¡the¡¡city¡¡man¡¡know¡¡that¡¡the¡¡grass¡­

green¡¡goddess¡¡is¡¡upon¡¡her¡¡throne¡£¡¡¡¡He¡¡sits¡¡at¡¡his

breakfast¡¡eggs¡¡and¡¡toast£»¡¡begirt¡¡by¡¡stone¡¡walls£»¡¡opens

his¡¡morning¡¡paper¡¡and¡¡sees¡¡journalism¡¡leave¡¡vernal¡­

ism¡¡at¡¡the¡¡post¡£



For£»¡¡whereas£»¡¡spring's¡¡couriers¡¡were¡¡once¡¡the¡¡evi¡­

dence¡¡of¡¡our¡¡finer¡¡senses£»¡¡now¡¡the¡¡Associated¡¡Press

does¡¡the¡¡trick¡£



The¡¡warble¡¡of¡¡the¡¡first¡¡robin¡¡in¡¡Hackensack£»¡¡the

stirring¡¡of¡¡the¡¡maple¡¡sap¡¡in¡¡Bennington£»¡¡the¡¡bud¡­

ding¡¡of¡¡the¡¡pussy¡¡willows¡¡along¡¡Main¡¡Street¡¡in¡¡Syra¡­

cuse£»¡¡the¡¡first¡¡chirp¡¡of¡¡the¡¡bluebird£»¡¡the¡¡swan¡¡song

of¡¡the¡¡Blue¡¡Point£»¡¡the¡¡annual¡¡tornado¡¡in¡¡St¡£¡¡Louis£»

the¡¡plaint¡¡of¡¡the¡¡peach¡¡pessimist¡¡from¡¡Pompton£»¡¡N¡£

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broken¡¡leg¡¡to¡¡the¡¡pond¡¡near¡¡Bilgewater¡¡Junction£»

the¡¡base¡¡attempt¡¡of¡¡the¡¡Drug¡¡Trust¡¡to¡¡boost¡¡the

price¡¡of¡¡quinine¡¡foiled¡¡in¡¡the¡¡House¡¡by¡¡Congressman

Jinks£»¡¡the¡¡first¡¡tall¡¡poplar¡¡struck¡¡by¡¡lightning¡¡and

the¡¡usual¡¡stunned¡¡picknickers¡¡who¡¡had¡¡taken¡¡refuge£»

the¡¡first¡¡crack¡¡of¡¡the¡¡ice¡¡jam¡¡in¡¡the¡¡Allegheny¡¡River£»

the¡¡finding¡¡of¡¡a¡¡violet¡¡in¡¡its¡¡mossy¡¡bed¡¡by

the¡¡correspondent¡¡at¡¡Round¡¡Corners¡¡¡­¡¡these¡¡are¡¡the

advance¡¡signs¡¡of¡¡the¡¡burgeoning¡¡season¡¡that¡¡are¡¡wired

into¡¡the¡¡wise¡¡city£»¡¡while¡¡the¡¡farmer¡¡sees¡¡nothing¡¡but

winter¡¡upon¡¡his¡¡dreary¡¡fields¡£



But¡¡these¡¡be¡¡mere¡¡externals¡£¡¡¡¡The¡¡true¡¡harbinger

is¡¡the¡¡heart¡£¡¡¡¡When¡¡Strephon¡¡seeks¡¡his¡¡Chloe¡¡and

Mike¡¡his¡¡Maggie£»¡¡then¡¡only¡¡is¡¡spring¡¡arrived¡¡and¡¡the

newspaper¡¡report¡¡of¡¡the¡¡five¡­foot¡¡rattler¡¡killed¡¡in

Squire¡¡Pettigrew's¡¡pasture¡¡confirmed¡£



Ere¡¡the¡¡first¡¡violet¡¡blew£»¡¡Mr¡£¡¡Peters£»¡¡Mr¡£¡¡Ragsdale

and¡¡Mr¡£¡¡Kidd¡¡sat¡¡together¡¡on¡¡a¡¡bench¡¡in¡¡Union

Square¡¡and¡¡conspired¡£¡¡¡¡Mr¡£¡¡Peters¡¡was¡¡the¡¡D'Artag¡­

nan¡¡of¡¡the¡¡loafers¡¡there¡£¡¡¡¡He¡¡was¡¡the¡¡dingiest£»¡¡the

laziest£»¡¡the¡¡sorriest¡¡brown¡¡blot¡¡against¡¡the¡¡green¡¡back¡­

ground¡¡of¡¡any¡¡bench¡¡in¡¡the¡¡park¡£¡¡¡¡But¡¡just¡¡then¡¡he

was¡¡the¡¡most¡¡important¡¡of¡¡the¡¡trio¡£



Mr¡£¡¡Peters¡¡had¡¡a¡¡wife¡£¡¡¡¡This¡¡had¡¡not¡¡heretofore

affected¡¡his¡¡standing¡¡with¡¡Ragsy¡¡and¡¡Kidd¡£¡¡¡¡But¡¡to¡­

day¡¡it¡¡invested¡¡him¡¡with¡¡a¡¡peculiar¡¡interest¡£¡¡¡¡His

friends£»¡¡having¡¡escaped¡¡matrimony£»¡¡had¡¡shown¡¡a

disposition¡¡to¡¡deride¡¡Mr¡£¡¡Peters¡¡for¡¡his¡¡venture¡¡on

that¡¡troubled¡¡sea¡£¡¡¡¡But¡¡at¡¡last¡¡they¡¡had¡¡been¡¡forced

to¡¡acknowledge¡¡that¡¡either¡¡he¡¡had¡¡been¡¡gifted¡¡with

a¡¡large¡¡foresight¡¡or¡¡that¡¡he¡¡was¡¡one¡¡of¡¡Fortune's

lucky¡¡sons¡£



For£»¡¡Mrs¡£¡¡Peters¡¡had¡¡a¡¡dollar¡£¡¡¡¡A¡¡whole¡¡dollar¡¡bill£»

good¡¡and¡¡receivable¡¡by¡¡the¡¡Government¡¡for¡¡customs£»

taxes¡¡and¡¡all¡¡public¡¡dues¡£¡¡¡¡How¡¡to¡¡get¡¡possession¡¡of

that¡¡dollar¡¡was¡¡the¡¡question¡¡up¡¡for¡¡discussion¡¡by¡¡the

three¡¡musty¡¡musketeers¡£



¡¨How¡¡do¡¡you¡¡know¡¡it¡¡was¡¡a¡¡dollar£¿¡¨¡¡asked¡¡Ragsy£»

the¡¡immensity¡¡of¡¡the¡¡sum¡¡inclining¡¡him¡¡to¡¡scepticism¡£



¡¨The¡¡coalman¡¡seen¡¡her¡¡have¡¡it£»¡¨¡¡said¡¡Mr¡£¡¡Peters¡£

¡¨She¡¡went¡¡out¡¡and¡¡done¡¡some¡¡washing¡¡yesterday¡£

And¡¡look¡¡what¡¡she¡¡give¡¡me¡¡for¡¡breakfast¡¡¡­¡¡the¡¡heel

of¡¡a¡¡loaf¡¡and¡¡a¡¡cup¡¡of¡¡coffee£»¡¡and¡¡her¡¡with¡¡a¡¡dollar£¡¡¨



¡¨It's¡¡fierce£»¡¨¡¡said¡¡Ragsy¡£



¡¨Say¡¡we¡¡go¡¡up¡¡and¡¡punch¡¡'er¡¡and¡¡stick¡¡a¡¡towel

in¡¡'er¡¡mouth¡¡and¡¡cop¡¡the¡¡coin¡¨¡¡suggested¡¡Kidd£»

Viciously¡£¡¡¡¨Y'¡¡ain't¡¡afraid¡¡of¡¡a¡¡woman£»¡¡are¡¡you£¿¡¨



¡¨She¡¡might¡¡holler¡¡and¡¡have¡¡us¡¡pinched£»¡¨¡¡demurred

Ragsy¡£¡¡¡¡¡¨I¡¡don't¡¡believe¡¡in¡¡slugging¡¡no¡¡woman¡¡in¡¡a

houseful¡¡of¡¡people¡£¡¨



¡¨Gent'men£»¡¨¡¡said¡¡Mr¡£¡¡Peters£»¡¡severely£»¡¡through

his¡¡russet¡¡stubble£»¡¡¡¨remember¡¡that¡¡you¡¡are¡¡speaking

of¡¡my¡¡wife¡£¡¡A¡¡man¡¡who¡¡would¡¡lift¡¡his¡¡hand¡¡to¡¡a

lady¡¡except¡¡in¡¡the¡¡way¡¡of¡¡¡¡¡¨



¡¨Maguire£»¡¨¡¡said¡¡Ragsy£»¡¡pointedly£»¡¡¡¨has¡¡got¡¡his

bock¡¡beer¡¡sign¡¡out¡£¡¡¡¡If¡¡we¡¡had¡¡a¡¡dollar¡¡we¡¡could¡¡¡¡¡¨



¡¨Hush¡¡up£¡¡¨¡¡said¡¡Mr¡£¡¡Peters£»¡¡licking¡¡his¡¡lips¡£

¡¨We¡¡got¡¡to¡¡get¡¡that¡¡case¡¡note¡¡somehow£»¡¡boys¡£¡¡¡¡Ain't

what's¡¡a¡¡man's¡¡wife's¡¡his£¿¡¡¡¡Leave¡¡it¡¡to¡¡me¡£¡¡¡¡I'll¡¡go

over¡¡to¡¡the¡¡house¡¡and¡¡get¡¡it¡£¡¡¡¡Wait¡¡here¡¡for¡¡me¡£¡¨



¡¨I've¡¡seen¡¡'em¡¡give¡¡up¡¡quick£»¡¡and¡¡tell¡¡you¡¡where

it's¡¡hid¡¡if¡¡you¡¡kick¡¡'em¡¡in¡¡the¡¡ribs£»¡¨¡¡said¡¡Kidd¡£



¡¨No¡¡man¡¡would¡¡kick¡¡a¡¡woman£»¡¨¡¡said¡¡Peters£»¡¡vir¡­

tuously¡£¡¡¡¡¡¨A¡¡little¡¡choking¡¡¡­¡¡just¡¡a¡¡touch¡¡on¡¡the

windpipe¡¡¡­¡¡that¡¡gets¡¡away¡¡with¡¡'em¡¡¡­¡¡and¡¡no¡¡marks

left¡£¡¡¡¡Wait¡¡for¡¡me¡£¡¡¡¡I'll¡¡bring¡¡back¡¡that¡¡dollar£»¡¡boys¡£¡¨



High¡¡up¡¡in¡¡a¡¡tenement¡­house¡¡between¡¡Second¡¡Ave¡­

nue¡¡and¡¡the¡¡river¡¡lived¡¡the¡¡Peterses¡¡in¡¡a¡¡back¡¡room

so¡¡gloomy¡¡that¡¡the¡¡landlord¡¡blushed¡¡to¡¡take¡¡the¡¡rent

for¡¡it¡£¡¡¡¡Mrs¡£¡¡Peters¡¡worked¡¡at¡¡sundry¡¡times£»¡¡doing

odd¡¡jobs¡¡of¡¡scrubbing¡¡and¡¡washing¡£¡¡¡¡Mr¡£¡¡Peters¡¡had

a¡¡pure£»¡¡unbroken¡¡record¡¡of¡¡five¡¡years¡¡without¡¡having

earned¡¡a¡¡penny¡£¡¡¡¡And¡¡yet¡¡they¡¡clung¡¡together£»¡¡shar¡­

ing¡¡each¡¡other's¡¡hatred¡¡and¡¡misery£»¡¡being¡¡creatures

of¡¡habit¡£¡¡¡¡Of¡¡habit£»¡¡the¡¡power¡¡that¡¡keeps¡¡the¡¡earth

from¡¡flying¡¡to¡¡pieces£»¡¡though¡¡there¡¡is¡¡some¡¡silly

theory¡¡of¡¡gravitation¡£



Mrs¡£¡¡Peters¡¡reposed¡¡her¡¡200¡¡pounds¡¡on¡¡the¡¡safer

of¡¡the¡¡two¡¡chairs¡¡and¡¡gazed¡¡stolidly¡¡out¡¡the¡¡one¡¡win¡­

dow¡¡at¡¡the¡¡brick¡¡wall¡¡opposite¡£¡¡¡¡Her¡¡eyes¡¡were¡¡red

and¡¡damp¡£¡¡¡¡The¡¡furniture¡¡could¡¡have¡¡been¡¡carried

away¡¡on¡¡a¡¡pushcart£»¡¡but¡¡no¡¡pushcart¡¡man¡¡would¡¡have

removed¡¡it¡¡as¡¡a¡¡gift¡£



The¡¡door¡¡opened¡¡to¡¡admit¡¡Mr¡£¡¡Peters¡£¡¡His¡¡fox¡­

terrier¡¡eyes¡¡expressed¡¡a¡¡wish¡£¡¡¡¡His¡¡wife's¡¡diagnosis

located¡¡correctly¡¡the¡¡seat¡¡of¡¡it£»¡¡but¡¡misread¡¡it¡¡hun¡­

ger¡¡instead¡¡of¡¡thirst¡£



¡¨You'll¡¡get¡¡nothing¡¡more¡¡to¡¡eat¡¡till¡¡night£»¡¨¡¡she

said£»¡¡looking¡¡out¡¡of¡¡the¡¡window¡¡again¡£¡¡Take¡¡your

hound¡­dog's¡¡face¡¡out¡¡of¡¡the¡¡room¡£¡¨



Mr¡£¡¡Peters's¡¡eye¡¡calculated¡¡the¡¡distance¡¡between

them¡£¡¡¡¡By¡¡taking¡¡her¡¡by¡¡surprise¡¡it¡¡might¡¡be¡¡pos¡­

sible¡¡to¡¡spring¡¡upon¡¡her£»¡¡overthrow¡¡her£»¡¡and¡¡apply

the¡¡throttling¡¡tactics¡¡of¡¡which¡¡he¡¡had¡¡boasted¡¡to

his¡¡waiting¡¡comrades¡£¡¡¡¡True£»¡¡it¡¡had¡¡been¡¡only¡¡a

boast£»¡¡never¡¡yet¡¡had¡¡be¡¡dared¡¡to¡¡lay¡¡violent¡¡bands

upon¡¡her£»¡¡but¡¡with¡¡the¡¡thoughts¡¡of¡¡the¡¡delicious£»¡¡cool

bock¡¡or¡¡Culmbacher¡¡bracing¡¡his¡¡nerves£»¡¡he¡¡was¡¡near

to¡¡upsetting¡¡his¡¡own¡¡theories¡¡of¡¡the¡¡treatment¡¡due¡¡by

a¡¡gentleman¡¡to¡¡a¡¡lady¡£¡¡¡¡But£»¡¡with¡¡his¡¡loafer's¡¡love

for¡¡the¡¡more¡¡artistic¡¡and¡¡less¡¡strenuous¡¡way£»¡¡he¡¡chose

diplomacy¡¡first£»¡¡the¡¡high¡¡card¡¡in¡¡the¡¡game¡¡¡¡the¡¡as¡­

sumed¡¡attitude¡¡of¡¡success¡¡already¡¡attained¡£



¡¨You¡¡have¡¡a¡¡dollar£»¡¨¡¡he¡¡said£»¡¡loftily£»¡¡but¡¡signifi¡­

cantly¡¡in¡¡the¡¡tone¡¡that¡¡goes¡¡with¡¡the¡¡lighting¡¡of¡¡a

cigar¡¡¡­¡¡when¡¡the¡¡properties¡¡are¡¡at¡¡hand¡£¡¨



¡¨I¡¡have£»¡¨¡¡said¡¡Mrs¡£¡¡Peters£»¡¡producing¡¡the¡¡bill

from¡¡her¡¡bosom¡¡and¡¡crackling¡¡it£»¡¡teasingly¡£



¡¨I¡¡am¡¡offered¡¡a¡¡position¡¡in¡¡a¡¡¡¡in¡¡a¡¡tea¡¡store£»¡¨

said¡¡Mr¡£¡¡Peters¡£¡¡¡¡¡¨I¡¡am¡¡to¡¡begin¡¡work¡¡to¡­morrow¡£

But¡¡it¡¡will¡¡be¡¡necessary¡¡for¡¡me¡¡to¡¡buy¡¡a¡¡pair¡¡of¡¡¡¨



¡¨You¡¡are¡¡a¡¡liar£»¡¨¡¡said¡¡Mrs¡£¡¡Peters£»¡¡reinterring

the¡¡note¡£¡¡¡¨No¡¡tea¡¡store£»¡¡nor¡¡no¡¡A¡¡B¡¡C¡¡store£»¡¡nor

no¡¡junk¡¡shop¡¡would¡¡have¡¡you¡£¡¡¡¡I¡¡rubbed¡¡the¡¡skin¡¡off

both¡¡me¡¡hands¡¡washin'¡¡jumpers¡¡and¡¡overalls¡¡to¡¡make

that¡¡dollar¡£¡¡¡¡Do¡¡you¡¡think¡¡it¡¡come¡¡out¡¡of¡¡them¡¡suds

to¡¡buy¡¡the¡¡kind¡¡you¡¡put¡¡into¡¡you£¿¡¡Skiddoo£¡¡¡¡¡Get

your¡¡mind¡¡off¡¡of¡¡money¡£¡¨



Evidently¡¡the¡¡poses¡¡of¡¡Talleyrand¡¡were¡¡not¡¡worth

one¡¡hundred¡¡cents¡¡on¡¡that¡¡dollar¡£¡¡¡¡But¡¡diplomacy¡¡is

dexterous¡£¡¡¡¡The¡¡artistic¡¡temperament¡¡of¡¡Mr¡£¡¡Peters

lifted¡¡him¡¡by¡¡the¡¡straps¡¡of¡¡his¡¡congress¡¡gaiters¡¡and

set¡¡him¡¡on¡¡new¡¡ground¡£¡¡¡¡He¡¡called¡¡up

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