the notch on the ax and on being found out-第3章

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become　emphatic　and　cogent；　not　to　say　rather　complacent；　in　such
an　address；　when　it　would　all　go　for　nothing　by　reason　of　the　Odd
Girl's　suddenly　stiffening　from　the　toes　upward；　and　glaring　among
us　like　a　parochial　petrifaction。

Streaker；　the　housemaid；　too；　had　an　attribute　of　a　most
discomfiting　nature。　　I　am　unable　to　say　whether　she　was　of　an
usually　lymphatic　temperament；　or　what　else　was　the　matter　with
her；　but　this　young　woman　became　a　mere　Distillery　for　the
production　of　the　largest　and　most　transparent　tears　I　ever　met
with。　　Combined　with　these　characteristics；　was　a　peculiar　tenacity
of　hold　in　those　specimens；　so　that　they　didn't　fall；　but　hung　upon
her　face　and　nose。　　In　this　condition；　and　mildly　and　deplorably
shaking　her　head；　her　silence　would　throw　me　more　heavily　than　the
Admirable　Crichton　could　have　done　in　a　verbal　disputation　for　a
purse　of　money。　　Cook；　likewise；　always　covered　me　with　confusion
as　with　a　garment；　by　neatly　winding　up　the　session　with　the
protest　that　the　Ouse　was　wearing　her　out；　and　by　meekly　repeating
her　last　wishes　regarding　her　silver　watch。

As　to　our　nightly　life；　the　contagion　of　suspicion　and　fear　was
among　us；　and　there　is　no　such　contagion　under　the　sky。　　Hooded
woman？　　According　to　the　accounts；　we　were　in　a　perfect　Convent　of
hooded　women。　　Noises？　　With　that　contagion　downstairs；　I　myself
have　sat　in　the　dismal　parlor；　listening；　until　I　have　heard　so
many　and　such　strange　noises；　that　they　would　have　chilled　my　blood
if　I　had　not　warmed　it　by　dashing　out　to　make　discoveries。　　Try
this　in　bed；　in　the　dead　of　the　night：　try　this　at　your　own
comfortable　fire…side；　in　the　life　of　the　night。　　You　can　fill　any
house　with　noises；　if　you　will；　until　you　have　a　noise　for　every
nerve　in　your　nervous　system。

I　repeat；　the　contagion　of　suspicion　and　fear　was　among　us；　and
there　is　no　such　contagion　under　the　sky。　　The　women　（their　noses
in　a　chronic　state　of　excoriation　from　smelling…salts）　were　always
primed　and　loaded　for　a　swoon；　and　ready　to　go　off　with　hair…
triggers。　　The　two　elder　detached　the　Odd　Girl　on　all　expeditions
that　were　considered　doubly　hazardous；　and　she　always　established
the　reputation　of　such　adventures　by　coming　back　cataleptic。　　If
Cook　or　Streaker　went　overhead　after　dark；　we　knew　we　should
presently　hear　a　bump　on　the　ceiling；　and　this　took　place　so
constantly；　that　it　was　as　if　a　fighting　man　were　engaged　to　go
about　the　house；　administering　a　touch　of　his　art　which　I　believe
is　called　The　Auctioneer；　to　every　domestic　he　met　with。

It　was　in　vain　to　do　anything。　　It　was　in　vain　to　be　frightened；
for　the　moment　in　one's　own　person；　by　a　real　owl；　and　then　to　show
the　owl。　　It　was　in　vain　to　discover；　by　striking　an　accidental
discord　on　the　piano；　that　Turk　always　howled　at　particular　notes
and　combinations。　　It　was　in　vain　to　be　a　Rhadamanthus　with　the
bells；　and　if　an　unfortunate　bell　rang　without　leave；　to　have　it
down　inexorably　and　silence　it。　　It　was　in　vain　to　fire　up
chimneys；　let　torches　down　the　well；　charge　furiously　into
suspected　rooms　and　recesses。　　We　changed　servants；　and　it　was　no
better。　　The　new　set　ran　away；　and　a　third　set　came；　and　it　was　no
better。　　At　last；　our　comfortable　housekeeping　got　to　be　so
disorganised　and　wretched；　that　I　one　night　dejectedly　said　to　my
sister：　〃Patty；　I　begin　to　despair　of　our　getting　people　to　go　on
with　us　here；　and　I　think　we　must　give　this　up。〃

My　sister；　who　is　a　woman　of　immense　spirit；　replied；　〃No；　John；
don't　give　it　up。　　Don't　be　beaten；　John。　　There　is　another　way。〃

〃And　what　is　that？〃　said　I。

〃John；〃　returned　my　sister；　〃if　we　are　not　to　be　driven　out　of　this
house；　and　that　for　no　reason　whatever；　that　is　apparent　to　you　or
me；　we　must　help　ourselves　and　take　the　house　wholly　and　solely
into　our　own　hands。〃

〃But；　the　servants；〃　said　I。

〃Have　no　servants；〃　said　my　sister；　boldly。

Like　most　people　in　my　grade　of　life；　I　had　never　thought　of　the
possibility　of　going　on　without　those　faithful　obstructions。　　The
notion　was　so　new　to　me　when　suggested；　that　I　looked　very
doubtful。

〃We　know　they　come　here　to　be　frightened　and　infect　one　another；
and　we　know　they　are　frightened　and　do　infect　one　another；〃　said　my
sister。

〃With　the　exception　of　Bottles；〃　I　observed；　in　a　meditative　tone。

（The　deaf　stable…man。　　I　kept　him　in　my　service；　and　still　keep
him；　as　a　phenomenon　of　moroseness　not　to　be　matched　in　England。）

〃To　be　sure；　John；〃　assented　my　sister；　〃except　Bottles。　　And　what
does　that　go　to　prove？　　Bottles　talks　to　nobody；　and　hears　nobody
unless　he　is　absolutely　roared　at；　and　what　alarm　has　Bottles　ever
given；　or　taken？　　None。〃

This　was　perfectly　true；　the　individual　in　question　having　retired；
every　night　at　ten　o'clock；　to　his　bed　over　the　coach…house；　with
no　other　company　than　a　pitchfork　and　a　pail　of　water。　　That　the
pail　of　water　would　have　been　over　me；　and　the　pitchfork　through
me；　if　I　had　put　myself　without　announcement　in　Bottles's　way　after
that　minute；　I　had　deposited　in　my　own　mind　as　a　fact　worth
remembering。　　Neither　had　Bottles　ever　taken　the　least　notice　of
any　of　our　many　uproars。　　An　imperturbable　and　speechless　man；　he
had　sat　at　his　supper；　with　Streaker　present　in　a　swoon；　and　the
Odd　Girl　marble；　and　had　only　put　another　potato　in　his　cheek；　or
profited　by　the　general　misery　to　help　himself　to　beefsteak　pie。

〃And　so；〃　continued　my　sister；　〃I　exempt　Bottles。　　And　considering；
John；　that　the　house　is　too　large；　and　perhaps　too　lonely；　to　be
kept　well　in　hand　by　Bottles；　you；　and　me；　I　propose　that　we　cast
about　among　our　friends　for　a　certain　selected　number　of　the　most
reliable　and　willingform　a　Society　here　for　three　monthswait
upon　ourselves　and　one　anotherlive　cheerfully　and　sociallyand
see　what　happens。〃

I　was　so　charmed　with　my　sister；　that　I　embraced　her　on　the　spot；
and　went　into　her　plan　with　the　greatest　ardor。

We　were　then　in　the　third　week　of　November；　but；　we　took　our
measures　so　vigorously；　and　were　so　well　seconded　by　the　friends　in
whom　we　confided；　that　there　was　still　a　week　of　the　month
unexpired；　when　our　party　all　came　down　together　merrily；　and
mustered　in　the　haunted　house。

I　will　mention；　in　this　place；　two　small　changes　that　I　made　while
my　sister　and　I　were　yet　alone。　　It　occurring　to　me　as　not
improbable　that　Turk　howled　in　the　house　at　night；　partly　because
he　wanted　to　get　out　of　it；　I　stationed　him　in　his　kennel　outside；
but　unchained；　and　I　seriously　warned　the　village　that　any　man　who
came　in　his　way　must　not　expect　to　leave　him　without　a　rip　in　his
own　throat。　　I　then　casually　asked　Ikey　if　he　were　a　judge　of　a
gun？　　On　his　saying；　〃Yes；　sir；　I　knows　a　good　gun　when　I　sees
her；〃　I　begged　the　favor　of　his　stepping　up　to　the　house　and
looking　at　mine。

〃SHE'S　a　true　one；　sir；〃　said　Ikey；　after　inspecting　a　double…
barrelled　rifle　that　I　bought　in　New　York　a　few　years　ago。　　〃No
mistake　about　HER；　sir。〃

〃Ikey；〃　said　I；　〃don't　mention　it；　I　have　seen　something　in　this
house。〃

〃No；　sir？〃　he　whispered；　greedily　opening　his　eyes。　　〃'Ooded　lady；
sir？〃

〃Don't　be　frightened；〃　said　I。　　〃It　was　a　figure　rather　like　you。〃

〃Lord；　sir？〃

〃Ikey！〃　said　I；　shaking　hands　with　him　warmly；　I　may　say
affectionately；　〃if　there　is　any　truth　in　these　ghost…stories；　the
greatest　service　I　can　do　you；　is；　to　fire　at　that　figure。　　And　I
promise　you；　by　Heaven　and　earth；　I　will　do　it　with　this　gun　if　I
see　it　again！〃

The　young　man　thanked　me；　and　took　his　leave　with　some　little
precipitation；　after　declining　a　glass　of　liquor。　　I　imparted　my
secret　to　him；　because　I　had　never　quite　forgotten　his　throwing　his
cap　at　the　bell；　because　I　had；　on　another　occasion；　noticed
something　very　like　a　fur　cap；　lying　not　far　from　the　bell；　one
night　when　it　had　burst　out　ringing；　and　because　I　had　remarked
that　we　were　at　our　ghostliest　whenever　he　came　up　in　the　evening
to　comfort　the　servants。　　Let　me　do　Ikey　no　injustice。　　He　was
afraid　of　the　house；　and　believed　in　its　being　haunted；　and　yet　he
would　play　false　on　the　haunting　side；　so　surely　as　he　got　an
opportunity。　The　Odd　Girl's　case　was　exactly　similar。　　She　went
about　the　house　in　a　state　of　real　terror；　and　yet　lied　monstrously
and　wilfully；　and　invented　many　of　the　alarms　she　spread；　and　made
many　of　the　sounds　we　heard。　　I　had　had　my　eye　on　the　two；　and　I
know　it。　　It　is　not　necessary　for　me；　here；　to　account　for　this
preposterous　state　of　mind；　I　content　myself　with　remarking　that　it
is　familiarly　known　to　every　intelligent　man　who　has　had　fair
medical；　legal；　or　other　watchful　experience；　that　it　is　as　well
established　and　as　common　a　state　of　mind　as　any　with　which
observers　are　acquainted；　and　that　it　is　one　of　the　first　elements；
above　all　others；　rationally　to　be　suspected　in；　and　strictly
looked　for；　and　separated　from；　any　question　of　this　kind。

To　return　to　our　party。　　The　first　thing　we　did　when　we　were　all
assembled；　was；　to　draw　lots　for　bedrooms。　　That　done；　and　every
bedroom；　and；　indeed；　the　whole　house；　having　been　minutely
examined　by　the　whole　body；　we　allotted　the　various　household
duties；　as　if　we　had　been　on　a　gipsy　party；　or　a　yachting　party；　or
a　hunting　party；　or　were　shipwrecked。　　I　then　recounted　the
floating　rumors　concerning　the　hooded　lady；　the　owl；　and　Master　B。：
with　others；　still　more　filmy；　which　had　floated　about　during　our
occupation；　relative　to　some　ridiculous　old　ghost　of　the　female
gender　who　went　up　and　down；　carrying　the　ghost　of　a　round　table；
and　also　to　an　impalpable　Jackass；　whom　nobody　was　ever　able　to
catch。　　Some　of　these　ideas　I　really　believe　our　people　below　had
communicated　to　one　another　in　some　diseased　way；　without　conveying
them　in　words。　　We　then　gravely　called　one　another　to　witness；　that
we　were　not　there　to　be　deceived；　or　to　deceivewhich　we
considered　pretty　much　the　same　thingand　that；　with　a　serious
sense　of　responsibility；　we　would　be　strictly　true　to　one　another；
and　would　strictly　follow　out　the　truth。　　The　understanding　was
established；　that　any　one　who　heard　unusual　noises　in　the　night；
and　who　wished　to　trace　them；　should　knock　at　my　door；　lastly；　that
on　Twelfth　Night；　the　last　night　of　holy　Christmas；　all　our
individual　experiences　since　that　then　present　hour　of　our　coming
together　in　the　haunted　house；　should　be　brought　to　light　for　the
good　of　all；　and　that　we　would　hold　our　peace　on　the　subject　till
then；　unless　on　some　remarkable　provocation　to　break　silence。

We　were；　in　number　and　in　character；　as　follows：

Firstto　get　my　sister　and　myself　out　of　the　waythere　were　we
two。　　In　the　drawing　of　lots；　my　sister　drew　her　own　room；　and　I
drew　Master　B。's。　　Next；　there　was　our　first　cousin　John　Herschel；
so　called　after　the　great　astronomer：　than　whom　I　suppose　a　better
man　at　a　telescope　does　not　breathe。　　With　him；　was　his　wife：　a
charming　creature　to　whom　he　had　been　married　in　the　previous
spring。　　I　thought　it　（under　the　circumstances）　rather　imprudent　to
bring　her；　because　there　is　no　knowing　what　even　a　false　alarm　may
do　at　such　a　time；　but　I　suppose　he　knew　his　own　business　best；　and
I　must　say　that　if　she　had　been　MY　wif