confidence-第16章

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t　attention。　The　rumor　of　it　spread　through　the　rooms；　and　the　crowd　about　the　roulette　received　a　large　contingent　of　spectators。　Bernard　felt　that　they　were　looking　more　or　less　eagerly　for　a　turn　of　the　tide；　but　he　was　in　the　humor　for　disappointing　them；　and　he　left　the　place；　while　his　luck　was　still　running　high；　with　ten　thousand　francs　in　his　pocket。　　It　was　very　late　when　he　returned　to　the　innso　late　that　he　forbore　to　knock　at　Gordon's　door。　　But　though　he　betook　himself　to　his　own　quarters；　he　was　far　from　finding；　or　even　seeking；　immediate　rest。　He　knocked　about；　as　he　would　have　said；　for　half　the　night　not　because　he　was　delighted　at　having　won　ten　thousand　francs；　but　rather　because　all　of　a　sudden　he　found　himself　disgusted　at　the　manner　in　which　he　had　spent　the　evening。　It　was　extremely　characteristic　of　Bernard　Longueville　that　his　pleasure　should　suddenly　transform　itself　into　flatness。　　What　he　felt　was　not　regret　or　repentance。　He　had　it　not　in　the　least　on　his　conscience　that　he　had　given　countenance　to　the　reprehensible　practice　of　gaming。　It　was　annoyance　that　he　had　passed　out　of　his　own　control　that　he　had　obeyed　a　force　which　he　was　unable　to　measure　at　the　time。　　He　had　been　drunk　and　he　was　turning　sober。　In　spite　of　a　great　momentary　appearance　of　frankness　and　a　lively　relish　of　any　conjunction　of　agreeable　circumstances　exerting　a　pressure　to　which　one　could　respond；　Bernard　had　really　little　taste　for　giving　himself　up；　and　he　never　did　so　without　very　soon　wishing　to　take　himself　back。　He　had　now　given　himself　to　something　that　was　not　himself；　and　the　fact　that　he　had　gained　ten　thousand　francs　by　it　was　an　insufficient　salve　to　an　aching　sense　of　having　ceased　to　be　his　own　master。　　He　had　not　been　playing　he　had　been　played　with。　　He　had　been　the　sport　of　a　blind；　brutal　chance；　and　he　felt　humiliated　by　having　been　favored　by　so　rudely…operating　a　divinity。　　Good　luck　and　bad　luck？　Bernard　felt　very　scornful　of　the　distinction；　save　that　good　luck　seemed　to　him　rather　the　more　vulgar。　　As　the　night　went　on　his　disgust　deepened；　and　at　last　the　weariness　it　brought　with　it　sent　him　to　sleep。　　He　slept　very　late；　and　woke　up　to　a　disagreeable　consciousness。　　At　first；　before　collecting　his　thoughts；　he　could　not　imagine　what　he　had　on　his　mindwas　it　that　he　had　spoken　ill　of　Angela　Vivian？　It　brought　him　extraordinary　relief　to　remember　that　he　had　gone　to　bed　in　extreme　ill…humor　with　his　exploits　at　roulette。　After　he　had　dressed　himself　and　just　as　he　was　leaving　his　room；　a　servant　brought　him　a　note　superscribed　in　Gordon's　handa　note　of　which　the　following　proved　to　be　the　contents。

〃Seven　o'clock；　A。M。

〃My　dear　Bernard：　　Circumstances　have　determined　me　to　leave　Baden　immediately；　and　I　shall　take　the　train　that　starts　an　hour　hence。　　I　am　told　that　you　came　in　very　late　last　night；　so　I　won't　disturb　you　for　a　painful　parting　at　this　unnatural　hour。　I　came　to　this　decision　last　evening；　and　I　put　up　my　things；　so　I　have　nothing　to　do　but　to　take　myself　off。　　I　shall　go　to　Basel；　but　after　that　I　don't　know　where；　and　in　so　comfortless　an　uncertainty　I　don't　ask　you　to　follow　me。　Perhaps　I　shall　go　to　America；　but　in　any　case　I　shall　see　you　sooner　or　later。　　Meanwhile；　my　dear　Bernard；　be　as　happy　as　your　brilliant　talents　should　properly　make　you；　and　believe　me　yours　ever；

G。W。

〃P。S。　It　is　perhaps　as　well　that　I　should　say　that　I　am　leaving　in　consequence　of　something　that　happened　last　evening；　but　not　by　any　traceable　processin　consequence　of　the　talk　we　had　together。　I　may　also　add　that　I　am　in　very　good　health　and　spirits。〃

Bernard　lost　no　time　in　learning　that　his　friend　had　in　fact　departed　by　the　eight　o'clock　trainthe　morning　was　now　well　advanced；　and　then；　over　his　breakfast；　he　gave　himself　up　to　meditative　surprise。　　What　had　happened　during　the　evening　what　had　happened　after　their　conversation　in　Gordon's　room？　He　had　gone　to　Mrs。　Vivian'swhat　had　happened　there？　Bernard　found　it　difficult　to　believe　that　he　had　gone　there　simply　to　notify　her　that；　having　talked　it　over　with　an　intimate　friend；　he　gave　up　her　daughter；　or　to　mention　to　the　young　lady　herself　that　he　had　ceased　to　desire　the　honor　of　her　hand。　Gordon　alluded　to　some　definite　occurrence；　yet　it　was　inconceivable　that　he　should　have　allowed　himself　to　be　determined　by　Bernard's　wordshis　diffident　and　irresponsible　impression。　Bernard　resented　this　idea　as　an　injury　to　himself；　yet　it　was　difficult　to　imagine　what　else　could　have　happened。　There　was　Gordon's　word　for　it；　however；　that　there　was　no　〃traceable〃　connection　between　the　circumstances　which　led　to　his　sudden　departure　and　the　information　he　had　succeeded　in　extracting　from　his　friend。　　What　did　he　mean　by　a　〃traceable〃　connection？　　Gordon　never　used　words　idly；　and　he　meant　to　make　of　this　point　an　intelligible　distinction。　It　was　this　sense　of　his　usual　accuracy　of　expression　that　assisted　Bernard　in　fitting　a　meaning　to　his　late　companion's　letter。　　He　intended　to　intimate　that　he　had　come　back　to　Baden　with　his　mind　made　up　to　relinquish　his　suit；　and　that　he　had　questioned　Bernard　simply　from　moral　curiosity　for　the　sake　of　intellectual　satisfaction。　　Nothing　was　altered　by　the　fact　that　Bernard　had　told　him　a　sorry　tale；　it　had　not　modified　his　behaviorthat　effect　would　have　been　traceable。　It　had　simply　affected　his　imagination；　which　was　a　consequence　of　the　imponderable　sort。　　This　view　of　the　case　was　supported　by　Gordon's　mention　of　his　good　spirits。　　A　man　always　had　good　spirits　when　he　had　acted　in　harmony　with　a　conviction。　Of　course；　after　renouncing　the　attempt　to　make　himself　acceptable　to　Miss　Vivian；　the　only　possible　thing　for　Gordon　had　been　to　leave　Baden。　　Bernard；　continuing　to　meditate；　at　last　convinced　himself　that　there　had　been　no　explicit　rupture；　that　Gordon's　last　visit　had　simply　been　a　visit　of　farewell；　that　its　character　had　sufficiently　signified　his　withdrawal；　and　that　he　had　now　gone　away　because；　after　giving　the　girl　up；　he　wished　very　naturally　not　to　meet　her　again。　　This　was；　on　Bernard's　part；　a　sufficiently　coherent　view　of　the　case；　but　nevertheless；　an　hour　afterward；　as　he　strolled　along　the　Lichtenthal　Alley；　he　found　himself　stopping　suddenly　and　exclaiming　under　his　breath〃Have　I　done　her　an　injury？　Have　I　affected　her　prospects？〃　　Later　in　the　day　he　said　to　himself　half　a　dozen　times　that　he　had　simply　warned　Gordon　against　an　incongruous　union。






CHAPTER　XV

Now　that　gordon　was　gone；　at　any　rate；　gone　for　good；　and　not　to　return；　he　felt　a　sudden　and　singular　sense　of　freedom。　It　was　a　feeling　of　unbounded　expansion；　quite　out　of　proportion；　as　he　said　to　himself；　to　any　assignable　cause。　Everything　suddenly　appeared　to　have　become　very　optional；　but　he　was　quite　at　a　loss　what　to　do　with　his　liberty。　It　seemed　a　harmless　use　to　make　of　it；　in　the　afternoon；　to　go　and　pay　another　visit　to　the　ladies　who　lived　at　the　confectioner's。　Here；　however；　he　met　a　reception　which　introduced　a　fresh　element　of　perplexity　into　the　situation　that　Gordon　had　left　behind　him。　　The　door　was　opened　to　him　by　Mrs。　Vivian's　maid…servant；　a　sturdy　daughter　of　the　Schwartzwald；　who　informed　him　that　the　ladieswith　much　regretwere　unable　to　receive　any　one。

〃They　are　very　busyand　they　are　ill；〃　said　the　young　woman；　by　way　of　explanation。

Bernard　was　disappointed；　and　he　felt　like　arguing　the　case。

〃Surely；〃　he　said；　〃they　are　not　both　ill　and　busy！　　When　you　make　excuses；　you　should　make　them　agree　with　each　other。〃

The　Teutonic　soubrette　fixed　her　round　blue　eyes　a　minute　upon　the　patch　of　blue　sky　revealed　to　her　by　her　open　door。

〃I　say　what　I　can；　lieber　Herr。　　It　's　not　my　fault　if　I　'm　not　so　clever　as　a　French　mamsell。　　One　of　the　ladies　is　busy；　the　other　is　ill。　There　you　have　it。〃

〃Not　quite；〃　said　Bernard。　　〃You　must　remember　that　there　are　three　of　them。〃

〃Oh；　the　little　onethe　little　one　weeps。〃

〃Miss　Evers　weeps！〃　exclaimed　Bernard；　to　whom　the　vision　of　this　young　lady　in　tears　had　never　presented　itself。

〃That　happens　to　young　ladies　when　they　are　unhappy；〃　said　the　girl；　and　with　an　artless　yet　significant　smile　she　carried　a　big　red　hand　to　the　left　side　of　a　broad　bosom。

〃I　am　sorry　she　is　unhappy；　but　which　of　the　other　ladies　is　ill？〃

〃The　mother　is　very　busy。〃

〃And　the　daughter　is　ill？〃

The　young　woman　looked　at　him　an　instant；　smiling　again；　and　the　light　in　her　little　blue　eyes　indicated　confusion；　but　not　perversity。

〃No；　the　mamma　is　ill；〃　she　exclaimed；　〃and　the　daughter　is　very　busy。　They　are　preparing　to　leave　Baden。〃

〃To　leave　Baden？　　When　do　they　go？〃

〃I　don't　quite　know；　lieber　Herr；　but　very　soon。〃

With　this　information　Bernard　turned　away。　　He　was　rather　surprised；　but　he　reflected　that　Mrs。　Vivian　had　not　proposed　to　spend　her　life　on　the　banks　of　the　Oos；　and　that　people　were　leaving　Baden　every　day　in　the　year。　　In　the　evening；　at　the　Kursaal；　he　met　Captain　Lovelock；　who　was　wandering　about　with　an　air　of　explosive　sadness。

〃Damn　it；　they　're　goingyes；　they　're　going；〃　said　the　Captain；　after　the　two　young　men　had　exchanged　a　few　allusions　to　current　events。　〃Fancy　their　leaving　us　in　that　heartless　manner！　　It　's　not　the　time　to　run　awayit　's　the　time　to　keep　your　rooms；　if　you　're　so　lucky　as　to　have　any。　　The　races　begin　next　week　and　there　'll　be　a　tremendous　crowd。　All　the　grand…ducal　people　are　coming。　　Miss　Evers　wanted　awfully　to　see　the　Grand　Duke；　and　I　promised　her　an　introduction。　　I　can't　make　out　what　Mrs。　Vivian　is　up　to。　　I　bet　you　a　ten…pound　note　she　's　giving　chase。　Our　friend　Wright　has　come　back　and　gone　off　again；　and　Mrs。　Vivian　means　to　strike　camp　and　follow。　　She　'll　pot　him　yet；　you　see　if　she　does　n't！〃

〃She　is　running　away　from　you；　dangerous　man！〃　said　Bernard。

〃Do　you　mean　on　account　of　Miss　Evers？　　Well；　I　admire　Miss　Evers　I　don't　mind　admitting　that；　but　I　ain't　dangerous；〃　said　Captain　Lovelock；　with　a　lustreless　eye。　〃How　can　a　fellow　be　dangerous　when　he　has　n't　ten　shillings　in　his　pocket？　　Desperation；　do　you　call　it？　　But　Miss　Evers　has　n't　money；　so　far　as　I　have　heard。　　I　don't　ask　you；〃　Lovelock　continued〃I　don't　care　a　damn　whether　she　has　or　not。　She　's　a　devilish　charming　girl；　and　I　don't　mind　telling　you　I　'm　hit。　　I　stand　no　chanceI　know　I　stand　no　chance。　Mrs。　Vivian　's　down　on　me；　and；　by　Jove；　Mrs。　Vivian　's　right。　I　'm　not　the　husband　to　pick　out　for　a　young　woman　of　expensive　habits　and　no　expectations。　　Gordon　Wright's　the　sort　of　young　man　that　's　wanted；　and；　hang　me；　if　Mrs。　Vivian　did　n't　want　him　so　much　for　her　own　daughter；　I　believe　she　'd　try　and　bag　him　for　the　little　one。　　Gad；　I　believe　that　to　keep　me　off　she　would　like　to　cut　him　in　two　and　give　half　to　each　of　them！　I　'm　afraid　of　that　little　woman。　　She　has　got　a　little　voice　like　a　screw…driver。　But　for　all　that；　if　I　could　get　away　from　this　cursed　place；　I　would　keep　the　girl　in　sight　hang　me　if　I　would　n't！　I　'd　cut　the　racesdash　me　if　I　would　n't！　But　I　'm　in　pawn；　if　you　know　what　that　means。　I　owe　a　beastly　lot　of　money　at　the　inn；　and　that　impudent　little　beggar　of　a　landlord　won't　let　me　out　of　his　sight。　The　luck　's　dead　against　me　at　those　filthy　tables；　I　have　n't　won