confidence-第35章

按键盘上方向键 ← 或 → 可快速上下翻页，按键盘上的 Enter 键可回到本书目录页，按键盘上方向键 ↑ 可回到本页顶部！
————未阅读完？加入书签已便下次继续阅读！


im。　　But　when　once　he　had　spoken；　he　should　have　stood　to　it。　　He　should　n't　have　had　two　opinionsone　for　me；　and　one　for　himself！　　He　put　me　off　my　guard。　　It　was　because　I　still　resisted　him　that　I　went　to　you　again；　that　last　time。　But　I　was　still　afraid　of　you；　and　in　my　heart　I　believed　him。　As　I　say；　I　always　believed　him；　it　was　his　great　influence　upon　me。　　He　is　the　cleverest；　the　most　intelligent；　the　most　brilliant　of　men。　　I　don't　think　that　a　grain　less　than　I　ever　thought　it；〃　he　continued；　turning　again　to　Bernard。　〃I　think　it　only　the　more；　and　I　don't　wonder　that　you　find　a　woman　to　believe　it。　　But　what　have　you　done　but　deceive　me？　It　was　just　my　belief　in　your　intelligence　that　reassured　me。　When　Miss　Vivian　refused　me　a　second　time；　and　I　left　Baden；　it　was　at　first　with　a　sort　of　relief。　　But　there　came　back　a　better　feelinga　feeling　faint　compared　to　this　feeling　of　to…day；　but　strong　enough　to　make　me　uneasy　and　to　fill　me　with　regret。　To　quench　my　regret；　I　kept　thinking　of　what　you　had　said；　and　it　kept　me　quiet。　　Your　word　had　such　weight　with　me！〃

〃How　many　times　more　would　you　have　wished　to　be　refused；　and　how　many　refusals　would　have　been　required　to　give　me　my　liberty？〃　asked　Bernard。

〃That　question　means　nothing；　because　you　never　knew　that　I　had　again　offered　myself　to　Miss　Vivian。〃

〃No；　you　told　me　very　little；　considering　all　that　you　made　me　tell　you。〃

〃I　told　you　beforehand　that　I　should　do　exactly　as　I　chose。〃

〃You　should　have　allowed　me　the　same　liberty！〃

〃Liberty！〃　cried　Gordon。　　〃Had　n't　you　liberty　to　range　the　whole　world　over？　Could　n't　he　have　found　a　thousand　other　women？〃

〃It　is　not　for　me　to　think　so；〃　said　Angela；　smiling　a　little。

Gordon　looked　at　her　a　moment。

〃Ah；　you　cared　for　him　from　the　first！〃　he　cried。

〃I　had　seen　him　before　I　ever　saw　you；〃　said　the　girl。

Bernard　suppressed　an　exclamation。　　There　seemed　to　flash　through　these　words　a　sort　of　retrospective　confession　which　told　him　something　that　she　had　never　directly　told　him。　　She　blushed　as　soon　as　she　had　spoken；　and　Bernard　found　a　beauty　in　this　of　which　the　brightness　blinded　him　to　the　awkward　aspect　of　the　fact　she　had　just　presented　to　Gordon。　At　this　fact　Gordon　stood　staring；　then　at　last　he　apprehended　itlargely。

〃Ah；　then；　it　had　been　a　plot　between　you！〃　he　cried　out。

Bernard　and　Angela　exchanged　a　glance　of　pity。

〃We　had　met　for　five　minutes；　and　had　exchanged　a　few　words　before　I　came　to　Baden。　　It　was　in　Italyat　Siena。　　It　was　a　simple　accident　that　I　never　told　you；〃　Bernard　explained。

〃I　wished　that　nothing　should　be　said　about　it；〃　said　Angela。

〃Ah；　you　loved　him！〃　　Gordon　exclaimed。

Angela　turned　awayshe　went　to　the　window。　　Bernard　followed　her　for　three　seconds　with　his　eyes；　then　he　went　on

〃If　it　were　so；　I　had　no　reason　to　suppose　it。　　You　have　accused　me　of　deceiving　you；　but　I　deceived　only　myself。　　You　say　I　put　you　off　your　guard；　but　you　should　rather　say　you　put　me　on　mine。　It　was；　thanks　to　that；　that　I　fell　into　the　most　senseless；　the　most　brutal　of　delusions。　　The　delusion　passed　away　it　had　contained　the　germ　of　better　things。　　I　saw　my　error；　and　I　bitterly　repented　of　it；　and　on　the　day　you　were　married　I　felt　free。〃

〃Ah；　yes；　I　have　no　doubt　you　waited　for　that！〃　cried　Gordon。　〃It　may　interest　you　to　know　that　my　marriage　is　a　miserable　failure。〃

〃I　am　sorry　to　hear　itbut　I　can't　help　it。〃

〃You　have　seen　it　with　your　own　eyes。　　You　know　all　about　it；　and　I　need　n't　tell　you。〃

〃My　dear　Mr。　Wright；〃　said　Angela；　pleadingly；　turning　round；　〃in　Heaven's　name；　don't　say　that！〃

〃Why　should　n't　I　say　it？　　I　came　here　on　purpose　to　say　it。　I　came　here　with　an　intentionwith　a　plan。　　You　know　what　Blanche　is　you　need　n't　pretend；　for　kindness　to　me；　that　you　don't。　You　know　what　a　precious；　what　an　inestimable　wife　she　must　make　me　how　devoted；　how　sympathetic　she　must　be；　and　what　a　household　blessing　at　every　hour　of　the　day。　　Bernard　can　tell　you　all　about　ushe　has　seen　us　in　the　sanctity　of　our　home。〃　Gordon　gave　a　bitter　laugh　and　went　on；　with　the　same　strange；　serious　air　of　explaining　his　plan。　　〃She　despises　me；　she　hates　me；　she　cares　no　more　for　me　than　for　the　button　on　her　glove　by　which　I　mean　that　she　does　n't　care　a　hundredth　part　as　much。　You　may　say　that　it　serves　me　right；　and　that　I　have　got　what　I　deserve。　　I　married　her　because　she　was　silly。　I　wanted　a　silly　wife；　I　had　an　idea　you　were　too　wise。　Oh；　yes；　that　's　what　I　thought　of　you！　　Blanche　knew　why　I　picked　her　out；　and　undertook　to　supply　the　article　required。　Heaven　forgive　her！　　She　has　certainly　kept　her　engagement。　But　you　can　imagine　how　it　must　have　made　her　like　me　knowing　why　I　picked　her　out！　　She　has　disappointed　me　all　the　same。　　I　thought　she　had　a　heart；　but　that　was　a　mistake。　It　does　n't　matter；　though；　because　everything　is　over　between　us。〃

〃What　do　you　mean；　everything　is　over？〃　　Bernard　demanded。

〃Everything　will　be　over　in　a　few　weeks。　　Then　I　can　speak　to　Miss　Vivian　seriously。〃

〃Ah！　　I　am　glad　to　hear　this　is　not　serious；〃　said　Bernard。

〃Miss　Vivian；　wait　a　few　weeks；〃　Gordon　went　on。　　〃Give　me　another　chance　then。　　Then　it　will　be　perfectly　right；　I　shall　be　free。〃

〃You　speak　as　if　you　were　going　to　put　an　end　to　your　wife！〃

〃She　is　rapidly　putting　an　end　to　herself。　　She　means　to　leave　me。〃

〃Poor；　unhappy　man；　do　you　know　what　you　are　saying？〃　Angela　murmured。

〃Perfectly。　　I　came　here　to　say　it。　　She　means　to　leave　me；　and　I　mean　to　offer　her　every　facility。　　She　is　dying　to　take　a　lover；　and　she　has　got　an　excellent　one　waiting　for　her。　Bernard　knows　whom　I　mean；　I　don't　know　whether　you　do。　She　was　ready　to　take　one　three　months　after　our　marriage。　It　is　really　very　good　of　her　to　have　waited　all　this　time；　but　I　don't　think　she　can　go　more　than　a　week　or　two　longer。　She　is　recommended　a　southern　climate；　and　I　am　pretty　sure　that　in　the　course　of　another　ten　days　I　may　count　upon　their　starting　together　for　the　shores　of　the　Mediterranean。　The　shores　of　the　Mediterranean；　you　know；　are　lovely；　and　I　hope　they　will　do　her　a　world　of　good。　　As　soon　as　they　have　left　Paris　I　will　let　you　know；　and　then　you　will　of　course　admit　that；　virtually；　I　am　free。〃

〃I　don't　understand　you。〃

〃I　suppose　you　are　aware；〃　said　Gordon；　〃that　we　have　the　advantage　of　being　natives　of　a　country　in　which　marriages　may　be　legally　dissolved。〃

Angela　stared；　then；　softly

〃Are　you　speaking　of　a　divorce？〃

〃I　believe　that　is　what　they　call　it；〃　Gordon　answered；　gazing　back　at　her　with　his　densely　clouded　blue　eyes。　〃The　lawyers　do　it　for　you；　and　if　she　goes　away　with　Lovelock；　nothing　will　be　more　simple　than　for　me　to　have　it　arranged。〃

Angela　stared；　I　say；　and　Bernard　was　staring；　too。　　Then　the　latter；　turning　away；　broke　out　into　a　tremendous；　irrepressible　laugh。

Gordon　looked　at　him　a　moment；　then　he　said　to　Angela；　with　a　deeper　tremor　in　his　voice

〃He　was　my　dearest　friend。〃

〃I　never　felt　more　devoted　to　you　than　at　this　moment！〃　Bernard　declared；　smiling　still。

Gordon　had　fixed　his　sombre　eyes　upon　the　girl　again。

〃Do　you　understand　me　now？〃

Angela　looked　back　at　him　for　some　instants。

〃Yes；〃　she　murmured　at　last。

〃And　will　you　wait；　and　give　me　another　chance？〃

〃Yes；〃　she　said；　in　the　same　tone。

Bernard　uttered　a　quick　exclamation；　but　Angela　checked　him　with　a　glance；　and　Gordon　looked　from　one　of　them　to　the　other。

〃Can　I　trust　you？〃　　Gordon　asked。

〃I　will　make　you　happy；〃　said　Angela。

Bernard　wondered　what　under　the　sun　she　meant；　but　he　thought　he　might　safely　add

〃I　will　abide　by　her　choice。〃

Gordon　actually　began　to　smile。

〃It　won't　be　long；　I　think；　two　or　three　weeks。〃

Angela　made　no　answer　to　this；　she　fixed　her　eyes　on　the　floor。

〃I　shall　see　Blanche　as　often　as　possible；〃　she　presently　said。

〃By　all　means！　　The　more　you　see　her　the　better　you　will　understand　me。　〃

〃I　understand　you　very　well　now。　　But　you　have　shaken　me　very　much；　and　you　must　leave　me。　　I　shall　see　you　alsooften。〃

Gordon　took　up　his　hat　and　stick；　he　saw　that　Bernard　did　not　do　the　same。

〃And　Bernard？〃　he　exclaimed。

〃I　shall　ask　him　to　leave　Paris；〃　said　Angela。

〃Will　you　go？〃

〃I　will　do　what　Angela　requests；〃　said　Bernard。

〃You　have　heard　what　she　requests；　it　's　for　you　to　come　now。〃

〃Ah；　you　must　at　least　allow　me　to　take　leave！〃　cried　Bernard。

Gordon　went　to　the　door；　and　when　he　had　opened　it　he　stood　for　a　while；　holding　it　and　looking　at　his　companions。　　Then

〃I　assure　you　she　won't　be　long！〃　he　said　to　Angela；　and　rapidly　passed　out。

The　others　stood　silent　till　they　heard　the　outer　door　of　the　apartment　close　behind　him。

〃And　now　please　to　elucidate！〃　said　Bernard；　folding　his　arms。

Angela　gave　no　answer　for　some　moments；　then　she　turned　upon　him　a　smile　which　appeared　incongruous；　but　which　her　words　presently　helped　to　explain。

〃He　is　intensely　in　love　with　his　wife！〃






CHAPTER　XXIX

This　statement　was　very　effective；　but　it　might　well　have　seemed　at　first　to　do　more　credit　to　her　satiric　powers　than　to　her　faculty　of　observation。　　This　was　the　light　in　which　it　presented　itself　to　Bernard；　but；　little　by　little；　as　she　amplified　the　text；　he　grew　to　think　well　of　it；　and　at　last　he　was　quite　ready　to　place　it；　as　a　triumph　of　sagacity；　on　a　level　with　that　other　discovery　which　she　had　made　the　evening　before　and　with　regard　to　which　his　especial　errand　to…day　had　been　to　congratulate　her　afresh。　It　brought　him；　however；　less　satisfaction　than　it　appeared　to　bring　to　his　clever　companion；　for；　as　he　observed　plausibly　enough；　Gordon　was　quite　out　of　his　head；　and；　this　being　the　case；　of　what　importance　was　the　secret　of　his　heart？

〃The　secret　of　his　heart　and　the　condition　of　his　head　are　one　and　the　same　thing；〃　said　Angela。　　〃He　is　turned　upside　down　by　the　wretchedly　false　position　that　he　has　got　into　with　his　wife。　She　has　treated　him　badly；　but　he　has　treated　her　wrongly。　They　are　in　love　with　each　other；　and　yet　they　both　do　nothing　but　hide　it。　　He　is　not　in　the　least　in　love　with　poor　me　not　to…day　any　more　than　he　was　three　years　ago。　He　thinks　he　is；　because　he　is　full　of　sorrow　and　bitterness；　and　because　the　news　of　our　engagement　has　given　him　a　shock。　But　that　's　only　a　pretexta　chance　to　pour　out　the　grief　and　pain　which　have　been　accumulating　in　his　heart　under　a　sense　of　his　estrangement　from　Blanche。　　He　is　too　proud　to　attribute　his　feelings　to　that　cause；　even　to　himself；　but　he　wanted　to　cry　out　and　say　he　was　hurt；　to　demand　justice　for　a　wrong；　and　the　revelation　of　the　state　of　things　between　you　and　me　which　of　course　strikes　him　as　incongruous；　we　must　allow　largely　for　thatcame　to　him　as　a　sudden　opportunity。　No；　no；〃　the　girl　went　on；　with　a　generous　ardor　in　her　face；　following　further　the　train　of　her　argument；　which　she　appeared　to　find　extremely　attractive；　〃I　know　what　you　are　going　to　say　and　I　deny　it。　　I　am　not　fanciful；　or　sophistical；　or　irrational；　and　I　know　perfectly　what　I　am　about。　　Men　are　so　stupid；　it　's　only　women　that　have　real　discernment。　　Leave　me　alone；　and　I　shall　do　something。　　Blanche　is　silly；　yes；　very　silly；　but　she　is　not　so　bad　as　her　husband　ac