april hopes-第21章

按键盘上方向键 ← 或 → 可快速上下翻页，按键盘上的 Enter 键可回到本书目录页，按键盘上方向键 ↑ 可回到本页顶部！
————未阅读完？加入书签已便下次继续阅读！



〃And　that's　what　made　it　the　more　odious。　　Do　you　think　I　wished　him　to
be　afraid　of　me？　　Would　that　be　any　pleasure？　　I　should　hate　myself　if　I
had　to　quell　anybody　into　being　unlike　themselves。〃　　She　sat　down　for　a
moment；　and　then　jumped　up　again；　and　went　to　the　window；　for　no　reason；
and　came　back。

〃Yes；〃　said　her　mother　impartially；　〃he's　light；　and　he's　roundabout。　　He
couldn't　come　straight　at　anything。〃

〃And　would　you　have　me　accept　such　abeing？〃

Mrs。　Pasmer　smiled　a　little　at　the　literary　word；　and　continued：　〃But
he's　very　sweet；　and　he's　as　good　as　the　day's　long；　and　he's　very　fond
of　you；　andI　thought　you　liked　him。〃

The　girl　threw　up　her　arms　across　her　eyes。　　〃Oh；　how　can　you　say　such　a
thing；　mamma？〃

She　dropped　into　a　chair　at　the　bedside；　and　let　her　face　fall　into　her
hands；　and　cried。

Her　mother　waited　for　the　gust　of　tears　to　pass　before　she　said；　〃But　if
you　feel　so　about　it〃

〃Mamma！〃　　Alice　sprang　to　her　feet。

〃It　needn't　come　from　you。　　I　could　make　some　excuse　to　see　himwrite
him　a　little　note〃

〃Never！〃　exclaimed　Alice　grandly。　　〃What　I've　done　I've　done　from　my
reason；　and　my　feelings　have　nothing　to　do　with　it。〃

〃Oh；　very　well；〃　said　her　mother；　going　out　of　the　room；　not　wholly
disappointed　with　what　she　viewed　as　a　respite；　and　amused　by　her
daughter's　tragics。　　〃But　if　you　think　that　the　feelings　have　nothing　to
do　with　such　a　matter；　you're　very　much　mistaken。〃　　If　she　believed　that
her　daughter　did　not　know　her　real　motives　in　rejecting　Dan　Mavering；　or
had　not　been　able　to　give　them；　she　did　not　say　so。

The　little　group　of　Aliceolaters　on　the　piazza；　who　began　to　canvass　the
causes　of　Mavering's　going　before　the　top　of　his　hat　disappeared　below
the　bank　on　the　path　leading　to　the　ferry…boat；　were　of　two　minds。　　One
faction　held　that　he　was　going　because　Alice　had　refused　him；　and　that
his　gaiety　up　to　the　last　moment　was　only　a　mask　to　hide　his　despair。
The　other　side　contended　that；　if　he　and　Alice　were　not　actually　engaged；
they　understood　each　other；　and　he　was　going　away　because　he　wanted　to
tell　his　family；　or　something　of　that　kind。　　Between　the　two　opinions
Miss　Cotton　wavered　with　a　sentimental　attraction　to　either。　　〃What　do
you　really　think？〃　she　asked　Mrs。　Brinkley；　arriving　from　lunch　at　the
corner　of　the　piazza　where　the　group　was　seated。

〃Oh；　what　does　it　matter；　at　their　age？〃　she　demanded。

〃But　they're　just　of　the　age　when　it　does　happen　to　matter；〃　suggested
Mrs。　Stamwell。

〃Yes；〃　said　Mrs。　Brinkley；　〃and　that's　what　makes　the　whole　thing　so
perfectly　ridiculous。　　Just　think　of　two　children；　one　of　twenty　and　the
other　of　twenty…three；　proposing　to　decide　their　lifelong　destiny　in　such
a　vital　matter！　　Should　we　trust　their　judgment　in　regard　to　the　smallest
business　affair？　　Of　course　not。　　They're　babes　in　arms；　morally　and
mentally　speaking。　　People　haven't　the　data　for　being　wisely　in　love　till
they've　reached　the　age　when　they　haven't　the　least　wish　to　be　so。　　Oh；　I
suppose　I　thought　that　I　was　a　grown　woman　too　when　I　was　twenty；　I　can
look　back　and　see　that　I　did；　and；　what's　more　preposterous　still；　I
thought　Mr。　Brinkley　was　a　man　at　twenty…four。　　But　we　were　no　more　fit
to　accept　or　reject　each　other　at　that　infantile　period〃

〃Do　you　really　think　so？〃　asked　Miss　Cotton；　only　partially　credulous　of
Mrs。　Brinkley's　irony。

〃Yes；　it　does　seem　out　of　all　reason；〃　admitted　Mrs。　Stamwell。

〃Of　course　it　is；〃　said　Mrs。　Brinkley。　　〃If　she　has　rejected　him；　she's
done　a　very　safe　thing。　　Nobody　should　be　allowed　to　marry　before　fifty。
Then；　if　people　married；　it　would　be　because　they　knew　that　they　loved
each　other。〃

Miss　Cotton　reflected　a　moment。　　〃It　is　strange　that　such　an　important
question　should　have　to　be　decided　at　an　age　when　the　judgment　is　so　far
from　mature。　　I　never　happened　to　look　at　it　in　that　light　before。〃

〃Yes；〃　said　Mrs。　Brinkleyand　she　made　herself　comfortable　in　an　arm
chair　commanding　a　stretch　of　the　bay　over　which　the　ferry…boat　must
pass〃but　it's　only　part　and　parcel　of　the　whole　affair。　　I'm　sure　that
no　grown　person　can　see　the　ridiculous　young　thingsinexperienced；
ignorant；　featherbrainedthat　nature　intrusts　with　children；　their
immortal　little　souls　and　their　extremely　perishable　little　bodies；
without　rebelling　at　the　whole　system。　　When　you　see　what　most　young
mothers　are；　how　perfectly　unfit　and　incapable；　you　wonder　that　the　whole
race　doesn't　teeth　and　die。　　Yes；　there's　one　thing　I　feel　pretty　sure
ofthat；　as　matters　are　arranged　now；　there　oughtn't　to　be　mothers　at
all；　there　ought　to　be　only　grandmothers。〃

The　group　all　laughed；　even　Miss　Cotton；　but　she　was　the　first　to　become
grave。　　At　the　bottom　of　her　heart　there　was　a　doubt　whether　so　light　a
way　of　treating　serious　things　was　not　a　little　wicked。

〃Perhaps；〃　she　said；　〃we　shall　have　to　go　back　to　the　idea　that
engagements　and　marriages　are　not　intended　to　be　regulated　by　the
judgment；　but　by　the　affections。〃

〃I　don't　know　what's　intended；〃　said　Mrs。　Brinkley；　〃but　I　know　what　is。
In　ninety…nine　cases　out　of　a　hundred　the　affections　have　it　their　own
way；　and　I　must　say　I　don't　think　the　judgment　could　make　a　greater　mess
of　it。　　In　fact；〃　she　continued；　perhaps　provoked　to　the　excess　by　the
deprecation　she　saw　in　Miss　Cotton's　eye；　〃I　consider　every　broken
engagement　nowadays　a　blessing　in　disguise。〃

Miss　Cotton　said　nothing。　　The　other　ladies　said；　〃Why；　Mrs。　Brinkley！〃

〃Yes。　　The　thing　has　gone　altogether　too　far。　　The　pendulum　has　swung　in
that　direction　out　of　all　measure。　　We　are　married　too　much。　　And　as　a
natural　consequence　we　are　divorced　too　much。　　The　whole　case　is　in　a
nutshell：　if　there　were　no　marriages；　there　would　be　no　divorces；　and
that　great　abuse　would　be　corrected；　at　any　rate。〃

All　the　ladies　laughed；　Miss　Cotton　more　and　more　sorrowfully。　　She　liked
to　have　people　talk　as　they　do　in　genteel　novels。　　Mrs。　Brinkley's　bold
expressions　were　a　series　of　violent　shocks　to　her　nature；　and　imparted　a
terrible　vibration　to　the　fabric　of　her　whole　little　rose…coloured　ideal
world；　if　they　had　not　been　the　expressions　of　a　person　whom　a　great　many
unquestionable　persons　accepted；　who　had　such　an　undoubted　standing；　she
would　have　thought　them　very　coarse。　　As　it　was；　they　had　a　great
fascination　for　her。　　〃But　in　a　case　like　that　of〃she　looked　round　and
lowered　her　voice〃our　young　friends；　I'm　sure　you　couldn't　rejoice　if
the　engagement　were　broken　off。〃

〃Well；　I'm　not　going　to　be　'a　mush　of　concession；'　as　Emerson　says；　Miss
Cotton。　　And；　in　the　first　place；　how　do　you　know　they're　engaged？〃

〃Ah；　I　don't；　I　didn't　mean　that　they　were。　　But　wouldn't　it　be　a　little
pathetic　if；　after　all　that　we've　seen　going　on；　his　coming　here
expressly　on　her　account；　and　his　perfect　devotion　to　her　for　the　past
two　weeks；　it　should　end　in　nothing？〃

〃Two　weeks　isn't　a　very　long　time　to　settle　the　business　of　a　lifetime。〃

〃No。〃

〃Perhaps　she's　proposed　delay；　a　little　further　acquaintance。〃

〃Oh；　of　course　that　would　be　perfectly　right。　　Do　you　think　she　did？〃

〃Not　if　she's　as　wise　as　the　rest　of　us　would　have　been　at　her　age。　　But
I　think　she　ought。〃

〃Yes？〃　said　Miss　Cotton　semi…interrogatively。

〃Do　you　think　his　behaviour　last　night　would　naturally　impress　her　with
his　wisdom　and　constancy？〃

〃No；　I　can't　say　that　it　would；　but〃

〃And　this　Alice　of　yours　is　rather　a　severe　young　person。　　She　has　her
ideas；　and　I'm　afraid　they're　rather　heroic。　　She'd　be　just　with　him；　of
course。　　But　there's　nothing　a　man　dreads　so　much　as　justicesome　men。〃

〃Yes；〃　pursued　Miss　Cotton；　〃but　that　very　disparityI　know　they're　very
unlikedon't　you　think〃

〃Oh　yes；　I　know　the　theory　about　that。　　But　if　they　were　exactly　alike　in
temperament；　they'd　be　sufficiently　unlike　for　the　purposes　of
counterparts。　　That　was　arranged　once　for　all　when　'male　and　female
created　He　them。'　　I've　no　doubt　their　fancy　was　caught　by　all　the　kinds
of　difference　they　find　in　each　other；　that's　just　as　natural　as　it's
silly。　　But　the　misunderstanding；　the　trouble；　the　quarrelling；　the　wear
and　tear　of　spirit；　that　they'd　have　to　go　through　before　they
assimilatedit　makes　me　tired；　as　the　boys　say。　　No：　I　hope；　for　the
young　man's　own　sake；　he's　got　his　conge。〃

〃But　he's　so　kind；　so　good　〃

〃My　dear；　the　world　is　surfeited　with　kind；　good　men。　　There　are　half　a
dozen　of　them　at　the　other　end　of　the　piazza　smoking；　and　there　comes
another　to　join　them；〃　she　added；　as　a　large　figure；　semicircular　in
profile；　advanced　itself　from　a　doorway　toward　a　vacant　chair　among　the
smokers。　　〃The　very　soul　of　kindness　and　goodness。〃　　She　beckoned　toward
her　husband；　who　caught　sight　of　her　gesture。　　〃Now　I　can　tell　you　all
his　mental　processes。　　First；　surprise　at　seeing　some　one　beckoning；　then
astonishment　that　it's　I；　though　who　else　should　beckon　him？then　wonder
what　I　can　want；　then　conjecture　that　I　may　want　him　to　come　here；　then
pride　in　his　conjecture；　rebellion；　compliance。〃

The　ladies　were　in　a　scream　of　laughter　as　Mr。　Brinkley　lumbered　heavily
to　their　group。

〃What　is　it？〃　he　asked。

〃Do　you　believe　in　broken　engagements？　　Now　quickoff…hand！〃

〃Who's　engaged？〃

〃No　matter。〃

〃Well；　you　know　Punch's　advice　to　those　about　to　marry？〃

〃I　knowchestnuts；〃　said　his　wife　scornfully。　　They　dismissed　each　other
with　tender　bluntness；　and　he　went　in　to　get　a　match。

〃Ah；　Mrs。　Brinkley；〃　said　one　of　the　ladies；　〃it　would　be　of　no　use　for
you　to　preach　broken　engagements　to　any　one　who　saw　you　and　Mr。　Brinkley
together。〃　　They　fell　upon　her；　one　after　another；　and　mocked　her　with
the　difference　between　her　doctrine　and　practice；　and　they　were　all　the
more　against　her　because　they　had　been　perhaps　a　little　put　down　by　her
whimsical　sayings。

〃Yes；〃　she　admitted。　　〃But　we've　been　thirty　years　coming　to　the
understanding　that　you　all　admire　so　much；　and　do　you　think　it　was　worth
the　time？〃




XXI。

Mavering　kept　up　until　he　took　leave　of　the　party　of　young　people　who　had
come　over　on　the　ferry…boat　to　Eastport　for　the　frolic　of　seeing　him　off。
It　was　a　tremendous　tour　de　force　to　accept　their　company　as　if　he　were
glad　of　it；　and　to　respond　to　all　their　gay　nothings　gaily；　to　maintain
a　sunny　surface　on　his　turbid　misery。　　They　had　tried　to　make　Alice　come
with　them；　but　her　mother　pleaded　a　bad　headache　for　her；　and　he　had　to
parry　a　hundred　sallies　about　her；　and　from　his　sick　heart　humour　the
popular　insinuation　that　there　was　an　understanding　between　them；　and
that　they　had　agreed　together　she　should　not　come。　　He　had　to　stand　about
on　the　steamboat　wharf　and　listen　to　amiable　innuendoes　for　nearly　an
hour　before　the　steamer　came　in　from　St。　John。　　The　fond　adieux　of　his
friends；　their　offers　to　take　any　message　back；　lasted　during　the
interminable　fifteen　minutes　that　she　lay　at　her　moorings；　and　then　he
showed　himself　at　the　stern　of　the　boat；　and　waved　his　handkerchief　in
acknowledgment　of　the　last　parting　salutations　on　shore。

When　it　was　all　over；　he　went　down　into　his　state…room；　and　shut　himself
in；　and　let　his　misery　rollover　him。　　He　felt　as　if　there　were　a　flood　of
it；　and　it　washed